When we wrote about her amusing court filing earlier today, we redacted her name. But since she has shown that she has no problem with being identified, even going so far as to comment on our prior post, we’re happy to shout her name from the blogospheric rooftops: ALISON MAYNARD.
Alison Maynard, who ran unsuccessfully for Colorado Attorney General as a Green Party candidate, is known in some circles as “Sunny” Maynard. And with her hilarious motion, Sunny Maynard has brightened the days of thousands of lawyers around the country.
This is why we’re naming her our Lawyer of the Day. Congratulations, Ms. Maynard!
For those of you who didn’t read our prior post, here’s the relevant excerpt from Maynard’s motion:
In the hours since we posted it, we’ve been bombarded by several lengthy email screeds from Maynard. Because most of them contained the words “water rights” and “bill of costs,” they were initially banished to the “Boring Stuff” subfolder of our “Junk Mail” folder.
But we dutifully rescued them, and we even read them. Some excerpts, as well as links with biographical information about Alison Maynard, appear after the jump.
This is the most noteworthy information that Maynard sent to us:
[T]he motion I filed WAS WITHDRAWN last night. That means it is considered as never filed. I filed another motion for extension out of time last night. If you publicize the original motion, you will be out of line, since it is considered never filed, as a matter of law.
In the meantime, I would like you to contact Phillip Doe, the chair of the Citizens’ Progressive Alliance, at (303) xxx-xxxx, or at firstname.lastname@example.org. He will tell you what this case is really about. It is very juicy material for your readers.
Maynard appears to think that our tipsters, who sent the motion to us because it caused them to laugh their asses off, are in cahoots with her enemies:
Know that your “confidential sources” are conducting a racket here in Colorado. Instead of putting on a case on the merits in water court, for instance, they focus all their energy on making me or my clients look bad, conducting a smear campaign, and the like. While the original motion for extension I filed represented a lapse in judgment, you should know that I am working essentially pro bono, in the public interest, to defend Colorado’s water resources and environment against this real estate developer/governmental cabal, which runs this state (and runs the federal government, as well). Call Phil. Let HIM be a source for you. You’ll like him.
Hmmm… We’re not so sure we want to become the “Erin Brockovich” of water rights. We may take a pass on that.
Maynard is REALLY convinced that our sources are out to get her:
I hope you appreciate, too, that MY clients, the members of the Citizens’ Progressive Alliance, do not act in secret, as “confidential sources.” They are not ashamed to reveal who they are, nor am I, even though I have been the target of some of the sociopaths on the other side — and I do not use that word lightly. The people who are communicating with you, one in particular, have caused me intentional harm because I have opposed their schemes.
If you are hearing from David Robbins, for instance, know that this man has spent a considerable portion of his career trying to destroy me. What you have described of your source fits: that’s how he operates, behind the scenes, so no one can pin it on him.
Actually, we didn’t say anything to Maynard about our sources, other than to say that our default rule at ATL is to keep all tipsters anonymous. But whatever.
Maynard makes various allegations against Robbins. We’re not going to run them because we haven’t verified them (and none of them are funny enough to merit the trouble of fact-checking).
Maynard also seems to think — perhaps she is just a touch paranoid — that many of the commenters on the last post are part of the cabal against her:
I’m wondering how many of the other comments on your site were posted by Scott McElroy (lawyer for the Southern Ute Tribe), David Robbins or Jennifer Hunt (one of the law firms for the Southwestern Water Conservation District and Animas-La Plata Water Conservancy District), Susan Schneider (lawyer for the U.S. Dept. of Justice), Janice Sheftel (another lawyer for the SWCD), Dan Israel (lawyer for the Ute Mountain Ute Tribe), Eve McDonald or Carol Angel (lawyers for the State of Colorado), John Bezdek (another lawyer with the Dept. of Justice), the whole cast of thousands who are engaged in this racket.
I think I neglected to tell you that, in obtaining funding for the Animas-La Plata project, these characters solemnly told the United States Congress that they were giving up irrigation as a use. They could not get environmental approvals for the project if irrigation was retained, so they removed it and Congress approved the project. Of course, now they have an irrigation project from which irrigation has been removed as a legal use! The problem for these lawyers, ethically, is that, despite their and their clients’ statements under oath to Congress, as well as their failure even to mention that they were seeking diligence as to irrigation in their application in this case in the water court, in the trial in 2006 they told the court they never really meant it: they did NOT give up irrigation as a use! They still sought a finding of diligence as to irrigation! And they got it. They got everything they wanted, of course, because that’s the way it is in Colorado.
Okay, most of that went WAY over our head. We appreciate Ms. Maynard’s commitment to her cause — but we think she needs to lighten up a bit.
How can we reconcile this deadly earnest, possibly paranoid environmental crusader with the fun-loving, wine-swilling, emoticon-using lawyer who filed such a delightful and charming motion?
This Is WAY Better Than ‘The Dog Ate My Pleading’
ALISON “SUNNY” MAYNARD: Candidate for Colorado attorney general [Krystle Russin]
On the Spot: Green candidate accuses Salazar of campaign-finance violations [CSIndy]
Attorney General Race Rife with Collusion Charges [Media Visions - Colorado]