Non-Sequiturs: 03.14.07

* “I even got out of community service, suckers!” [AP via HuffPo]
* And somewhere, a torts professor is drafting his “false imprisonment” hypo for upcoming final exams. [Detroit Free Press]
* This is the problem with straight fashion designers. (Serious Note: Sexual violence is one of the few things I NEVER make light of, but I personally see this as a classic he-said/she-said, with a little statutory, which I consider — rightly or wrongly — malum prohibitum, thrown in for good measure.) [Yahoo! News]
* Train wrecks, on the other hand, are free-for-all’s: Lindsay Lohan’s dad is now a free man, and in the past, he’s been such an inspiration in helping her to lay off drugs and to cope with familial dysfunction that there’s no telling what he’s capable of as a redeemed man. [The Showbuzz]

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