Biglaw, Nauseating Things, Robert Link, Vermin / Rodents / Pests

Breaking: Cadwalader Overrun By Bed Bugs!!!

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We hear that Cadwalader, Wickersham & Taft is a tough place to work these days. Over the past few years, CTW’s profits per partner have skyrocketed — but such growth has come at a price.
Today the firm is much more of a business, and much less of a partnership. Collegiality is down, and billable hours — as well as associate dissatisfaction — are up.
But these aren’t the only problems plaguing Cadwalader. A source forwarded us an internal CWT email, with this introductory squib:

Just received this from a friend over there. As if the crushing leverage and abuse weren’t enough, CWT has BED BUGS….

Don’t believe us? The office-wide email, sent out about an hour and a half ago by firm chairman Robert O. Link Jr., appears after the jump.


CADWALADER WICKERSHAM & TAFT — OFFICE-WIDE EMAIL ABOUT BED BUGS
Here’s the email. Our commentary appears in brackets.
From: Robert Link
Sent: Monday, June 25, 2007 4:58 PM
To: MAIL-NY_EVERYONE
Subject: 33rd Floor
As many of you are aware, last week there had been reports of bed bugs in
the Word Processing Department on the 33rd floor.
[The paragraph that follows, which discusses the bedbug extermination process in excruciating detail, was obviously written by a lawyer.]
We immediately arranged with Assured Environments, a full-service integrated
pest management firm operating in the metro NY area for over 70 years and a
a specialist in the treatment of bed bugs, to review our problem and make
recommendations on both short and long-term solutions. On Monday evening,
June 18, the Word Processing Department and adjacent areas were sprayed
using a combination of compounds, none of which have an odor, and all of
which are entirely safe for use in an office environment. During the course
of the extermination, a box was identified as the source of the bugs and was
immediately removed from the premises. A single treatment by an
exterminator usually controls bed bugs and prevents reinfestation for
several months. However, since it is almost impossible to penetrate all
hiding places, a few living bed bugs may be seen for a week to 10 days after
treatment, at which point the area is resprayed. On Friday afternoon, we
received information that an insect — which may or may not have been a bed
bug — was seen, again on the 33rd floor. Accordingly, Assured Environments
treated the entire 33rd floor beginning on Saturday morning. A report of an
insect this morning has prompted us to again aggressively treat this problem
and Assured Environments will spray the entire 33rd floor this evening
beginning at 8:00 pm.
The individual who we believe brought the insects into the firm came forward
on Tuesday, June 19, and is no longer associated with the firm.
[Not welcome at Cadwalader: Yale Law School grads, and people with bed bugs.]
Bed bugs, while not usually found in a work environment, can cause
uncomfortable itching. They do not show themselves during daylight hours,
only at night in the dark. The bites of bed bugs closely resemble the bites
that you might expect to get from something like a mosquito. A small,
reddish bump may appear on the skin and in some cases it can produce a
slight itching reaction as well. The best evidence of bed bugs is not the
actual bugs but the waste material left behind that is either a dark brown
or reddish color.
[Uncomfortable itching. Nocturnal activity. Was this really a bed bug outbreak? Or just symptoms of working with Dennis Block?]
Assured Environments has said that it is very unlikely that these bugs could
be transmitted to your home. However, for the next several days, please
closely examine your clothing and any materials you take out of the office.
Note also that Assured Environments has assured us that Cadwalader does not
have any infestation and will continue to proceed with an aggressive course
of action to remedy the situation. Other reports of insects — which we
receive periodically in an office environment — have been carefully
investigated and, in each instance, were identified as fruit flies or gnats.
[Or summer associates.]
Please do not hesitate to contact Elizabeth Hart at [xxxx] if you have any
questions.

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