April 2014

Swiss Miss Swiss Mister Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgThanks to everyone who has responded thus far to our call for summer associate stories. We’ve received a number of colorful anecdotes, which we’ll be publishing over the next few days (or weeks, if the supply holds up). If you have a story you’d like to share, please check out the submission guidelines.
We like this one ’cause it’s weird — not just your typical tale of SA inebriation, followed by a drunken hookup and/or fistfight. Check it out:
1. Superhero name: The Swiss Mister
2. Special power: The ability to consume massive quantities of hot chocolate.
3. Summered: Lord, Bissell & Brook, Chicago, “a few years ago”
4. Claim to fame: From a source at the firm:

at the firm, there are kitchens on every floor. the kitchens have various drinks for the people to have while working: coffee, tea, and hot cocoa.

there is a protocol — it’s not that hard. if you are thirsty, or cold, or just want something nice and caffeinated, you go there and get a drink. common sense, right?

well, on this guy’s floor, meeting services noticed that every night, the hot cocoa drawer was empty. they would refill it, and the next night it would be gone again. it was very bizarre… since the coffee and tea are more popular anyway, especially during the summer. the drawer is big. it holds a lot of packets of hot cocoa. but, every night… it was all gone.

it turns out this summer associate was stealing all of the hot cocoa. every day.

Read more — including how he was apprehended, and whether he got an offer — after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “X-Summers: The Swiss Mister”

Susman Godfrey LLP Above the Law blog.JPGThe folks over at litigation powerhouse Susman Godfrey like to toot their own horn. But that’s okay, because they have a lot to boast about. The firm has been tremendously successful, and it pays its people very well (especially in terms of bonuses).
So this news should come as no surprise to anyone. From the Texas Lawyer:

Over the weekend, Houston-based Susman Godfrey joined the growing list of Texas-based firms opting to compensate Texas associates at rates comparable to their New York counterparts.

According to firm spokesman Shawn Raymond, the partners at Susman decided on July 21 to raise associate salaries effective Aug. 1 to $160,000 for first-years, $170,000 for second-years, $175,000 for third-years, $180,000 for fourth-years, and $190,000 for fifth years — after which lawyers at the firm are considered candidates for partnership.

“We want to attract the best and brightest at this firm,” Raymond says when asked about the changes.

That’s one short partnership track — which makes up for the relatively small salary increases after the second year. (And considering that pay levels for Texas associates beyond the second year are still up in the air, it’s not clear that Susman is even below market.)
Susman Godfrey Raises Associate Salaries, Effective Aug. 1 [Texas Lawyer]

Clifford Chance LLP Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgThis story has been making the rounds in New York summer associate circles. We’ve known about it for a while, but we wanted to get more corroboration. Now that we’ve heard the same details from multiple sources, we feel that it’s fair game.
In the style of Page Six, we’re doing it as a blind item.* Here you go:

A partner at Clifford Chance was seen making out with a summer associate at the corporate reception [on Thursday, July 12]. The two were seen leaving together when a fifth-year associate ran out and told the partner: “Dude, you don’t want to do this.”

Now THAT is a good associate. The model associate is like an extension of the partner’s mind — the sober part.
So are summer associates fair game? Read the rest of this post, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Summer Associate of the Day Earlier in the Month: The Clifford Chance Lolita”

patil.jpg* Sex abuse case is lost in translation. [Washington Post via How Appealing]
* A victory for judicial independence in Pakistan? [Jurist]
* God I’m sick of Harry Potter. [WSJ Law Blog]
* Speaking of South Asia, India has elected its first woman president, and she’s a lawyer. [AFP via Yahoo!]
* The NYT on Stephen Abraham. [New York Times]

pile of cash or money Above the Law legal blog.jpgOkay, that’s a bit of an understatement. Check out this interesting study, authored by Steven N. Kaplan and Joshua D. Rauh.
Here’s a money quote (hehe) from their paper (p. 31):

“[T]he representation of top corporate lawyers in the top 0.5% and top 0.1% AGI [adjusted gross income] brackets has increased substantially over time.”

Translation: Biglaw partners are taking up more and more space among the ranks of the rich.
What is happening to the pay of law partners? [Volokh Conspiracy]
Related: Sally Struthers Asks: ‘What About the Children Partners?’

Dodgeball Thelen Reid Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpg* She was listed in the NYT wedding announcements as an HLS magna grad — and would have gotten away with it, if it wasn’t for you meddling kids! [Jossip] [FN1]
* Don’t dress up in a giant pink bunny suit and hang out by a bank, unless you want to get yo’self tasered. [FourthAmendment.com]
* Thelen kicks O’Melveny’s ass — in dodgeball. [Legal Pad]
* Not worth a separate post, but here’s a link, plus a comment: “Dickie C is taking the reigns while GW gets poked in the anus. What’s funny about this is how the media reports this as news. As if Dick isn’t always in control.” [AFP]
[FN1] In response to an email we received: our tagline is tongue-in-cheek. We have no reason to doubt the Times’s explanation that the magna mistake resulted from “an editing error,” and not any attempt at deception by the bride.
(Jeez, people, you need to lighten up a bit…)

Legal%20Eagle%20Wedding%20Watch%20NYT%20wedding%20announcements%20Above%20the%20Law.jpgLEWW salutes Laura Marshall Worth, a direct descendant of Chief Justice John Marshall, who celebrated her wedding last weekend. Laura wasted a great law-school admissions essay and became a teacher, so this hat-tip is all she gets.
Here are our three lucky finalist-couples:

1. Rebecca Ingber and Anton Metlitsky
2. Alexandra Flood and Samuel Alcoff
3. Devon Powers and David Bennion

More about these couples, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Legal Eagle Wedding Watch: Deb-acle!”

John O'Quinn John M O'Quinn Anna Nicole Smith Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgLately we’ve been writing a lot about the Lone Star State. So it’s fitting that John O’Quinn, the “legendary and controversial” Texas trial lawyer, is ATL’s Lawyer of the Day.
Why? Here are at least 35.7 million reasons.
Breaking: Wood v. John O’Quinn ruling [Overlawyered]
John M. O’Quinn bio [The O'Quinn Law Firm]
John O’Quinn [Wikipedia]

Michael Vick dog dogfight Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgFrom ESPN.com (gavel bang: commenter):

In another [Michael] Vick-related matter, the quarterback’s camp has begun interviewing candidates to beef up his legal defense team in the event he goes to trial [on federal charges of conspiracy related to an alleged dogfighting venture].

Vick’s longtime personal attorney, Lawrence Woodward, is expected to remain part of the defense team, but advisors have urged that the Falcons star consider adding counsel with experience in the federal courts.

The Vick camp has solicited recommendations and is believed to have interviewed at least one prominent defender from the prestigious Washington, D.C., firm of Wilmer Hale.

And from a second commenter:

WilmerHale for Vick? Wow, doesn’t seem like a dog-fighting defense shop. They do white collar defense, but that’s a different ball game. From their website: “We have defended clients against allegations of insider trading; securities, healthcare, accounting and government contracts fraud; criminal antitrust violations; money laundering; and alleged violations of the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act and other statutes.”

So, any speculation as to which WilmerHale lawyer is being considered by Team Vick? Or a recommendation of a top “dog-fighting defense shop” for the embattled sports star?
NFL, Falcons could ask Vick to focus energies in court [ESPN.com]

X Men small X Summers X Summer Associates Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgYesterday we wrote about a former summer associate in the Chicago office of Katten Muchin Rosenman. He was fired earlier this month, after he allegedly (1) made racially insensitive remarks and (2) engaged in inappropriate physical contact with female summer associates.
With respect to the first allegation, it’s claimed that he first made a racist comment to another summer associate. When she got angry, he supposedly told her he liked “angry black women.”
(Hmm… What’s he doing for the rest of the summer? We hear that Shanetta Cutlar is hiring.)
With respect to the second allegation, it’s claimed that the ex-SA “repeatedly smack[ed] the asses of female summers” or “play[ed] grab ass with female summers.” What was he thinking? This is obviously unacceptable.
(Silly summer. Ass-grabbing is for partners!)
Read the rest, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “The X-Summers: What If the Katten Kreep Met Aquagirl?”

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