This Florida attorney pops up in our pages often enough to have his own category. We’re only a few months into 2008, but Jack Thompson is already on the shortlist for Lawyer of the Year.
We’re awarding him a second Lawyer of the Day distinction for today’s sanction [PDF] from the Supreme Court of Florida. But we’re placing him in the Hall of Fame, making him ineligible for consideration in the future, out of fairness to competitors.
The court is requiring him to get “qualified counsel” in the Florida Bar’s case against him. The court directs the Clerk of Court to reject any future filings “submitted by John Bruce Thompson, unless signed by a member in good standing of The Florida Bar other than himself.”
In addition to poor judgment in filing coloring books and gay porn with the court, Thompson lacks the the art of sweet talk:
In one of these filings, he references the “children’s picture book for adults” and reiterates that he “sent a pleading chocked full of pictures to illustrate his verbal points, since the Court seemed unable to grasp the words.”
ATL practice pointer: Don’t insult the intelligence of your judges. In writing. In a filing to the court. Also, do not model your legal language on dialogue from the movie Dirty Harry.
In the conclusion to his latest response, Thompson states, “This Court has been foolish indeed. It’s [sic] bizarre, idiotic show cause order indicates that it is not done being foolish. Fine. Enter the order you want. Make my day.”
Thank you for making ATL’s day, Jack Thompson.