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‘I try not to read that many cases, Your Honor.’

foot in mouth.gifWhen judges preside over law school moot court arguments, like the one at Columbia Law School last week, they often dish out this compliment to the student advocates: “You’re better than most of the practicing lawyers who appear before us.”

And maybe they’re not just being nice. If we had gotten to this item a bit earlier — it’s from last week — Roger Phipps would have been a Lawyer of the Day. We’re happy to declare him our Lawyer of Last Week.

Over at the Legal Profession Blog, Professor Alan Childress draws attention to this per curiam opinion (PDF) by the Fifth Circuit. Here’s an excerpt:

[W]e would be remiss if we did not comment on the conduct of Roger Phipps, counsel for Hartz, during oral argument in this case on Tuesday, March 4, 2008. Phipps’ conduct towards the Court during argument was unprofessional. Even more serious was his admission that during his work on the case (including his preparation for argument), he had not read a key Supreme Court case. His cavalier disregard for his client’s interest and for his obligation to the Court was both troubling and disgraceful. [FN4]

Accordingly, we are ordering Phipps to provide his client, Hartz, a copy of our opinion immediately after it is released. In order to ensure compliance, we are further directing him to supply our Court with proof of service.

Ouch. So what did Phipps do to incur the court’s wrath?

Read the text of footnote four, after the jump.

Update: For a postscript to this story, see here.

Here is Roger Phipps’s ill-fated exchange with the court:

Phipps: … so that’s about all I have to say, Your Honor. I don’t have anything other than that. You know, my client lives in Chicago. … She continues to earn a living, and she’s generally unavailable if you call her because she, she’s sort of a traveling doctor.

Judge: That’s not much of thing you come in here and tell us, I guess.

Phipps: Well, my attitude is, the [district court] judge got it right … . And as far as whether even Ricks should apply, I don’t think it should.

Judge: What do you do about Morgan?

Phipps: I don’t, I don’t, I don’t know Morgan, Your Honor.

Judge: You don’t know Morgan?

Phipps: Nope.

Judge: You haven’t read it?

Phipps: I try not to read that many cases, your Honor. Ricks is the only one I read. Oh, Ledbetter, I read Ledbetter, and I read that one that they brought up last night. I don’t know if that’s not Ledbetter, I can’t remember the name of it. Ricks is the one that I go by; it’s my North star. Either it applies or it doesn’t apply. I don’t think it applies.

Judge: I must say, Morgan is a case that is directly relevant to this case. And for you representing the Plaintiff to get up here—it’s a Supreme Court case—and say you haven’t read it. Where did they teach you that?

Phipps: They didn’t teach me much, Your Honor.

Judge: At Tulane, is it?

Phipps: Loyola.

Judge: Okay. Well, I must say, that may be an all time first.

Phipps: That’s why I wore a suit today, Your Honor.

Judge: Alright. We’ve got your attitude, anyway.

As for which Loyola Law School graduated Phipps, there’s some ambiguity on that score. Read the full post over at Legal Profession Blog for more details.

In the end, Professor Childress (jokingly) concludes: “I will just assume that Mr. Phipps is a proud graduate of Loyola-Los Angeles.”

Home of Loyola 2L, of course. Holla atcha boy!

Update: For a postscript to this story, see here.

Never Saw This Argument To The Fifth Circuit Before: “I Try Not To Read That Many Cases, Your Honor” [Legal Profession Blog]
Hartz v. Tulane Educational Fund (PDF) [U.S. Court of Appeals for the Fifth Circuit]

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