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ATL Gives You A Real Caption Contest

In previous caption contests -- e.g., POTUS and the Easter Bunny and the South Florida Blackout -- there have been complaints about our providing context for the photos. We do read the comments, and we've decided to listen to you, complainers.

So here's a legally-themed photo (a courtroom scene), with no context (for now), and here are the rules: Post your caption entries in the comments. Assuming sufficient response, we'll take our favorites, incorporate them into a poll, and allow you to vote for your favorite.
Pig Trial.jpg

Update: The caption contest is now closed. Finalists on their way.

Comments
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1 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:19 PM

"She's lying, Your Honor. I do like bacon, but I swear I didn't eat her son for breakfast."

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2 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:20 PM

"Honey, I told you do NOT come visit me at work".

3 Posted by Dr Gonzo | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:24 PM

The court frowns on porking your client.

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4 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:24 PM

It was John's first--and last--pro bono matter.

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5 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:25 PM

"You see, Your Honor, my client's house was blown down without even so much as a Notice of Condemnation!"

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6 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:25 PM

Your honor, the fact that Kermit's finger smells like bacon IS relevant.

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7 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:26 PM

Hillary Clinton deeply engaged in the practice of law.

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8 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:26 PM

"Your honor, my client didn't steal the pearls. They were cast before her."

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9 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:26 PM

As her counsel, Bunsen Honeydew, sat with disbelief, Ms. Piggy refused to look at Kermit the Frog chilling testimony in which Kermit described years of emotional, psychological, and physical abuse.

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10 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:26 PM

"Yes, your honor... between lay-offs and de-equitization, our firms is running a little thin on litigators. But I assure you, she's perfectly qualified to second chair this trial."

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11 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:27 PM

"The senator argued, perhaps unconvincingly, that the Big Dig was not a pork barrel project."

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12 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:28 PM

As her counsel, Bunsen Honeydew, sat with disbelief, Ms. Piggy refused to look at Kermit the Frog's chilling testimony in which Kermit described years of emotional, psychological, and physical abuse.

(reposted to correct typo!)

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13 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:28 PM

Res Ipsa Porquitor

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14 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:29 PM

Say hi to the firm's new mascot.

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15 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:29 PM

Joan King meeting up with a BLS toilet lawyer alum.

16 Posted by Dr Gonzo | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:30 PM

BigLaw Partner after being told by court he must represent indigent client: "But your honor, she's not Kosher!"

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17 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:32 PM

If this doesn't get my picture on a law blog, I'm not sure what will.

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18 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:34 PM

Linda Lawyer knew that her client was a lying, cheating, stealing, scumbag CEO of the worst kind. Her only hope was the vaunted "Dress Up As a Pig" gambit she learned in trial advocacy class at Loyola.

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19 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:34 PM

"This is not what I meant when I told you to wear a suit to court!"

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20 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:35 PM

Loyola's Finest.

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21 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:35 PM

The two little piggies looked on while their brother testified against the wolf.

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22 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:37 PM

3:25(1) - Priceless.

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23 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:38 PM

"Summer associates arrive Monday. Be ready"

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24 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:39 PM

and you're sure this blue bowtie doesn't make me look silly??

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25 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:39 PM

Clearly Ms. Bernstein's plastic surgey did not turn out as expected.

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26 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:39 PM

Q: "What did she say when you refused to pay her?"
Witness: "She said, 'It's not over until porky b-oinks you kid!' "

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27 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:41 PM

As her counsel, Bunsen Honeydew, sat with disbelief, Ms. Piggy refused to look at Kermit the Frog during chilling testimony in which Kermit described years of emotional, psychological, and physical abuse.

(reposted to correct the corrected typo, argh!)

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28 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:41 PM

Hostile Work Environment

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29 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:42 PM

"We're going to bleed the defendant like a stuck pi.... Oh. Right. Sorry."

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30 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:42 PM

Object to the characterization "pig", your honor!

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31 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:43 PM

"Your Honor, we intend to prove that Pink Floyd clearly infringed upon my client's trademark."

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32 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:44 PM

You Honor, my name is David Lat, attorney for the defendant, SEN.

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33 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:45 PM

"...and this little piggy will go "wee! wee! wee!" as La eMe gets an early Christmas gift."

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34 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:46 PM

Dangit, I knew I should have work my Kermit the frog suit!

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35 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:46 PM

Tired of everyone making fun of his stuttering problem, Porky Pig finally snapped when, at a recent Tonight Show appearance, the Looney Tunes star assaulted John Melendez because he thought the former Howard Stern sidekick turned announcer was making fun of him. Porky now stands trial on a charge of assault.

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36 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:47 PM

Plaintiffs Earl and Oinky Wesson, who are challenging Alabama's bestiality law as unconstitutional, watch as their attorney argues that Massachusetts' legalization of gay marriage obviously and directly leads to the legalization of his clients marriage. In the row behind the couple are 4 of their 8 children (the other 4 inherited their mother's porcine appearance and are held in pigpen outside during trial).

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37 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:47 PM

"Your Honor, the evidence clearly shows that my client stayed home while the others went to the market on the night in question."

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38 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:47 PM

goddamn is kash lazy

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39 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:48 PM

"Excuse me, Justice Thomas, you like what on your Egg McMuffin?"

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40 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:48 PM

Day 6 of the mock trial of 3 Little Pigs v. Big Bad Wolf. Another childhood classic ruined.

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41 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:49 PM

Bring your daughter to work day was always a tough time of the year for Dave.

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42 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:50 PM

Another escort linked to Spitzer appeared in court today.

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43 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:50 PM

Going wee, wee, wee all the way home does not show consciousness of guilt, Your Honor!

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44 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:50 PM

Does anyone in the courtroom not see where this custody hearing is going?

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45 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:52 PM

Jones frowned. Using the "lipstick on a pig" metaphore now seemed a poor choice.

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46 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:52 PM

The little pig and his lawyer watch in stunned disbelief during his trial for the murder of the big bad wolf, as the prosecutor asks for the "bacon penalty"

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47 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:53 PM

Kudos 3:20 thru 3:25

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48 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:53 PM

Pig: I'm sorry, your Honor, my client wasn't aware that it was "Dress Up as Your Favorite Barnyard Animal" Day.
Clinet: What are you talking about?! I dressed up as a lawyer!

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49 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:54 PM

Oh my...was that you?!

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50 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:54 PM

The pink pig your honour? My apologies, I suffer from id visibility syndrome.

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51 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:54 PM

"No opposition to the 550 Petition your honor"

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52 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:54 PM

Ms. Piggy takes Justice Scalia's advice to "Make a good first impression. Dress appropriately and bear yourself with dignity,” by wearing her best blue tie and matching eye shadow.

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53 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:56 PM

Ms. Piggy heeds Justice Scalia's advice to “Make a good first impression. Dress appropriately and bear yourself with dignity,” by wearing her best blue tie and matching eye shadow.

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54 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:56 PM

Pictured: At a break in the trial, equity partner Sherman McCoy (right) informs income partner Jim Jones (left) that there won't be any new shares this year.

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55 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:58 PM

After being arrested for offering Ms. Wells money for sex, Mr. Smith tried, without success, to have his hearing severed from hers.

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56 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 3:58 PM

"Um, your honor? I'm the attorney. My client is the one wearing a pig costume." "Apologies, Counsel. I can't seem to tell the two of you apart."

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57 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:00 PM

On Day 6 of Napoleon's trial for crimes against animality, the defendant sits impassively through the direct examination of the prosecution's star witness, Snowball.

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58 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:01 PM

The children looked on in shocked disbelief as Porky was arraigned after being caught in a tranny sex sting.

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59 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:01 PM

"That'll do, Counsel. That'll do."

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60 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:02 PM

The defense calls Mimi Bobeck to the stand...

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61 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:03 PM

Yes, your honor. This is one of the incest children taken from the Texas Polygamy Compound.

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62 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:04 PM

Vegetarian prosecutor's worst nightmare.

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63 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:04 PM

No cop jokes yet?

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64 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:05 PM

4:01 - Good one.

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65 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:06 PM

Does anybody else smell that?

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66 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:06 PM

Wow, no cop as pig jokes. Such a law and order crowd here. Snore.

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67 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:06 PM

"Man I wish my attorney hadn't dressed as a pig"

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68 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:07 PM

"With her appearance alone she's being a more honest defendant than Ken Lay ever could have been."

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69 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:07 PM

Apologies to the court, your honor, but what happens in Vegas apparently did not stay in Vegas...

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70 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:08 PM

At this time, the defense wishes to call its first witness in the case against the Big Bad Wolf.

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71 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:10 PM

And until justice is served, my client will not rest. Not by the hair on her chinny-chin-chin.

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72 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:11 PM

My apologies your honor, but my client is supposed to smell like that.

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73 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:12 PM

"Your honor, with her appearance alone my client is being more honest than ken lay ever could have been."

(Corrected from above)

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74 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:12 PM

The trial of Judge Halverson turned ugly today when a group of her supporters showed up in the gallery.

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75 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:12 PM

She said she was going to the market and never came home.

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76 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:13 PM

My client did not know that it is illegal to accept wagers on her rotisserie league. She will plead guilty, your honor, if only to spare herself the inevitable grilling she will receive on the stand.

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77 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:14 PM

Apparently there's been some sort of misunderstanding here, Your Honor. When I told my client to dress for court as she would for work, I was unaware of her profession in the child entertainment industry.

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78 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:15 PM

The slope was slipperier than originally thought.

79 Posted by Turd Ferguson | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:15 PM

Attorney Michael Lewis had his doubts about his client from day one. At first it was her outrageous attire. Then it was her sometimes suggestive tone when discussing the impending trial. But it was upon returning to defendant's table from a obviously contentious side bar that Mr. Lewis heard his client say beathily to herself that "arguing with a lawyer is like mud wrestling with a pig," and then, sotto voce: "after a while you realize that the pig actually enjoys it."

Mr. Lewis now quietly ponders the requirements for withdrawal.

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80 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:15 PM

Which one's the lawyer?

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81 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:16 PM

Along with everyone in the gallery, hapless defense counsel realises that not only his client but also his defense of her is a pig in a poke.

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82 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:16 PM

hahaha 3:41(1) is good, took 3 tries though apparently

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83 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:16 PM

In a shocking deviation from its preference for the electric chair, the defendant (right) was sentenced by the Texas court to a three-hour roasting at 350 degrees, Jack Daniels style.

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84 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:17 PM

Your Honor, would it possible to pause for a second lunch recess? My client is a bit of a... well. You know.

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85 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:17 PM

Paul had admired her as a young child, but he couldn't repress the feeling of shame and filth as a bedraggled Miss Piggy slowly ran her cloven hoof up his leg.

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86 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:18 PM

Although Loverboy may disagree, pig and elephant DNA will splice, and this DNA test proves it your honor.

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87 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:18 PM

"Your Honor,

I would like you to meet my intern from the Tulane class of '09."

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88 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:18 PM

Mad props for 3:52(1) and 4:01(2)

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89 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:19 PM

4:18 - that's clearly a Fordham intern, not Tulane

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90 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:20 PM

As law firms cut their spending on lavish summer associate dinners, they look for new ways to make their firms appear friendly and down to earth. In this scene a summer associate and her supervisor work on a pro bono matter for Heifer International. "I'm just happy to go to court," stated "of counsel" attorney John Johnson.

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91 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:20 PM

"But doing it piggy style is still legal in this state your Honor!"

92 Posted by Turd Ferguson | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:20 PM

Attorney Michael Lewis had his doubts about his client from day one. At first it was her outrageous attire. Then it was her sometimes suggestive tone when discussing the impending trial. But it was upon returning to defendant's table from an obviously contentious side bar that Mr. Lewis heard his client say beathily to herself, "arguing with a lawyer is like mud wrestling with a pig," and then, sotto voce: "after a while you realize that the pig actually enjoys it."

Mr. Lewis now quietly ponders the requirements for withdrawal.

(typos fixed, I hope!)

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93 Posted by benuga | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:22 PM

Yea, that's right. Try and tell them I'm not crazy.

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94 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:22 PM

At this point, Bruce just wishes the damn dream would end.

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95 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:23 PM

ha 4:01(1)

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96 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:23 PM

Lawyer: Look, I know you're upset, but we're not going to win this case. Truth is an absolute defense to slander.

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97 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:24 PM

Clients Never Listen -- Attorney warned told her client that he would be reprimanded for wearing a gold tie to court.

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98 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:25 PM

AK47 on May 5th

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99 Posted by Bitchy McBitchington | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:25 PM

Seen above: The stunned attorney's reaction to the judge's question as to whether, in fact, the attorney had violated the strict no sex with your client rule.

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100 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:25 PM

"This case will settle when my client flies."

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101 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:25 PM

Your Honor, don't judge me by my client - Just bringin' home the bacon, sir.

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102 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:25 PM

"Take the deal, Kinko. I didn't know they'd fill the gallery with witnesses."

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103 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:26 PM

"And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberating and conjugating the Emancipation Proclamation... does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense.

If two legs are in fact good, you must acquit! The defense rests."

Hat tip: Animal Farm, and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Ansg8BFbxc (which is bloody hilarious imho).

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104 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:27 PM

Captain of the University of Iowa cheerleading squad on trial for her "hazin' and grazin'" training program.

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105 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:28 PM

Your Honor, my client has not expressed a desire as to whether she would like to be served with a mustard-based sauce or a vinegar-based sauce.

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106 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:29 PM

Lawyers at top law firms continue to struggle with the definition of "Business Casual"

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107 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:30 PM

Let's just say, your Honor, that my firm has taken its sustainability initiative to a whole new level.

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108 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:31 PM

Hold on counsel, let me guess ... insanity defense?

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109 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:32 PM

Although in court only for a parking violation, defendant (right) was bewildered after the judge screamed from the bench, "Fry the B*****d!"

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110 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:32 PM

As her counsel, Bunsen Honeydew, sat with disbelief, Ms. Piggy refused to look at Kermit the Frog during chilling testimony in which Kermit described years of emotional, psychological, and physical abuse.

(reposted in the hopes it will be funny this time!)

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111 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:32 PM

"Your honor, plaintiffs' argument is hogwash!"

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112 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:33 PM

Wlibur's daughter sits stoically as Zimmerman testifies in his own defense, "Of course, I slaughtered him; that's what you do with a prize pig."

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113 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:33 PM

Swine ipsa loquitur.

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114 Posted by Bitchy McBitchington | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:33 PM

You guys need to make the captions fit the picture more closely. He has obviously just been asked some question or seen something to which he is not sure how to respond. The pig is staring at him waiting for him to respond, but very confident in whatever that response might be.

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115 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:33 PM

Jim was horrified to learn that cocounsel had not read the section of Scalia and Garner's new book on oral argument that he had highlighted - "dress appropriately and bear yourself with dignity."

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116 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:34 PM

After going through several model/actresses to play the unnaturally beautiful Assistant District Attorney character in their hit courtroom drama, the "Law and Order" casting department finally scrapes the bottom of the barrel.

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117 Posted by Bitchy McBitchington | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:34 PM

Neither the pig nor the man at the table are speaking, so any caption where they say something makes no sense.

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118 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:36 PM

Your Honor, Plaintiff's witness, Charlotte, has woven a tangled web of lies. Just week she called my client "some pig."

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119 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:36 PM

If my client hadn't killed that man she would have been eaten. It was self-defense Your Honor.

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120 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:37 PM

No, they don't have pink jumpsuits where you're going. So enjoy it today.

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121 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:37 PM

The first time she ever cross-examined a witness, she immediately took to it like a pig in shit.

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122 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:38 PM

Please make sure "res ipsa porquitur" is on the final ballot.

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123 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:38 PM

In a world of silk purses and pig's ears, cocounsel's wardrobe choice was not a silk purse of the art of trial strategy.

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124 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:39 PM

You Honor, not to worry, I'm Jewish.

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125 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:39 PM

What was I thinking when I told her we had a good case of discrimination against Hebrew National ...

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126 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:40 PM

He realized his tactical mistake when she sat down. Even though she had put on a dress, she was still, in fact, a pig.

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127 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:41 PM

"Your honor, I swear she looked better last night"

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128 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:41 PM

The children's eyes grew wide with uncertainty as Ms. Piggy's hand crept closer to Karl Rove's thigh, confused not so much by the piglet's presence in the courtroom as by the unmistakable fact that Mr. Rove was not wearing any pants.

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129 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:41 PM

And this little piggy, dressed like a hussy, went to court!

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130 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:43 PM

During the recess, Sam pondered business school.

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131 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:43 PM

The defense sat in shock as the prosecution's star witness, Charlotte S. Spider, stated that the supposedly copyrighted material in question had actually been transcribed from a piece of trash onto the web medium, thereby torpedoing their claim that the defendant was, in fact, "Some pig."

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132 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:44 PM

"As you can see your honor, the person in the pink suit is clearly infringing my face"

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133 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:44 PM

The controversial Ad campaign recently launched by the Illinois Trial Lawyers Assocaition, depicts courtrooms as the new battleground for 4H contestants post Tort Reform. Pictured right, the blue ribbon winner smiles confidently as the runner up argues his case.

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134 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:44 PM

If the silk purse does not fit, you must aquit!

135 Posted by Guy Incognito | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:45 PM

"Calling Ms. Piggy to the stand proved less helpful than he had imagined."

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136 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:46 PM

"If the pig suit doesn't fit, you must acquit!"

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137 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:46 PM

All rise for his honor, Judge Wolf.

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138 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:49 PM

Your honor, my client is NOT a pedophile. The little boy misunderstood what she meant when she said "Eat Me, i'm the other white meat."

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139 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:49 PM

Hofstra Magna !!!

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140 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:50 PM

Reminded of the saying "pigs get fed, hogs get slaughtered," Johnny contemplates whether his client is the former or the latter.

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141 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:50 PM

"Your honor, defense calls Detective Mark Fuhrman to testify on his own behalf."

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142 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:51 PM

Attorney John Smith pauses at a critical moment in the trial, trying to figure out how to answer Judge Scalia's question of "Have you been porking your client, Mr. Smith?"

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143 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:51 PM

4:46(2), that is brilliant.

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144 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:51 PM

Making his first appearance in court since returning to private practice, former White House counsel Fred Fielding stated that he is looking forward to the intellectual challenges of trial advocacy after having endured the hare-brained existence as a member of the Bush administration.

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145 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:52 PM

"It was either this or my pant-suit from Lane Bryant"

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146 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:53 PM

Thomas only needed to look into the eyes of the sad children in the courtroom to know how serious this case was: if the court set a precedent infriging the rights of imaginary story-book characters, there could be no Christmas this year.

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147 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:54 PM

I like 3:39 the best so far. too funny.

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148 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 4:57 PM

Babe gets ready to testify to answer accusations he used performance enhancing drugs as last year's sheep-herding competition.

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149 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:02 PM

This case is a pig.

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150 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:02 PM

It was going to be impossible to pick a jury that didn't already know their baloney has a first name.

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151 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:02 PM

Thomas only needed to look into the eyes of the sad children in the courtroom to know how serious this case was: if the court set a precedent infringing the rights of imaginary story-book characters, there could be no Christmas this year.

(fixed typo)

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152 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:06 PM

The worst part? She's not wearing pants.

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153 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:07 PM

Even the Deliverance rednecks were shocked by Wachtell's training program for new lawyers. "They took it too far," said the toothless guy.

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154 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:07 PM

"And you, sir, are absolutely certain that it was my client you saw fleeing from the scene of the crime?"

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155 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:08 PM

Even the classmates of Attorney Jones' daughter, who were present in court as part of view a parent at work day, were shocked to learn that the defense has pinned its hopes on persuading the jury that the defendant is in fact a barnyard animal incable of forming the mental state required for the offense charge.

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156 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:10 PM

Please tell me there is something more to this defense beyond telling them I am a pig.

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157 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:10 PM

Trial is so much more interesting on shrooms

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158 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:11 PM

Plaintiff's motion to grease the defendant is granted.

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159 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:12 PM

How could you come to court looking like that? Were you born in a...oh forget it.

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160 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:12 PM

That's the $200 Juicy Couture jumpsuit she talked to me about?

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161 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:12 PM

Your Honor, in order to avoid the jury becoming biased against my client, I must request that the jury be sequestered from the following things: barbecue ribs (that includes smoked, honey, AND regular), bacon, baked ham, ham sandwiches, pork sausages, pork chops, pork loin, pork rinds, pork barrel spending, Porky the Pig, the Muppets, Charlotte's Web, Babe, and Babe: Pig in the City.

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162 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:13 PM

Contrary to public opinion, your honor, my client is not happy about being in such deep sh**!

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163 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:14 PM

"Yes Your Honor...just graduated from Northwestern Law School"

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164 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:16 PM

"Yes, your honor, my client has agreed to fully cooperate with the government and squeal on her co-conspirators."

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165 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:16 PM

Your honor, I would like to change cousnel. I believe she can no longer adequately represent me.

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166 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:16 PM

"Your honor, we request that you instruct the jury to arrive at its decision without considering the race, creed, ethnicity or....well, anything about the defendant."

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167 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:16 PM

As a tax attorney, mock trial for kids is the closest I get to Perry Mason.

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168 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:17 PM

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, as we will show, Wilbur is truly some pig. He is many things, but one thing he is not is a murderer. Charlotte died of natural causes."

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169 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:17 PM

Everyone is a winner at Nixon Peabody.

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170 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:18 PM

"Ok, I know I'm not on the partnership track, but this assignment just screams that they want me out..."

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171 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:19 PM

"What was that, your Honor? Why yes, my bologna does have first name."

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172 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:20 PM

"Your honor, defense requests a recess for lunch. I gotta get a hotdog or someth...oh, wait."

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173 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:20 PM

At the conclusion of his case, Larry Lawyer suddenly realized his summer associate had misinformed him: the standard for harassment constituting a hostile work environment was severe and pervasive, not severe and persuasive. Dressing his client as an "ugly sow," which her supervisor admitted calling her for the past nine years, had actually weakened her claim!

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174 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:22 PM

Representative Henry Waxman's daughter stands accused

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175 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:24 PM

Best so far...

4:01(2)
4:12(2)
4:25(1)

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176 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:24 PM

I think it was "sheep's clothing" your client was looking for.

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177 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:24 PM

"Go to law school, dress like me. Get an MBA, look like Porky over here."

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178 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:28 PM

The judge looked confused. The lawyer tried again. "My client works at UPENN State's Philadelphia campus, your honor. The one with the football team and the Wharden business school."

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179 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:28 PM

Judge, I thought we agreed that there would be no press allowed in the courtroom.

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180 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:28 PM

Hey idiots, a caption is different than a quote.

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181 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:29 PM

No, your Honor, my client is not mocking you. We simply believe that she will come off more sympathetically to the jury if we introduce some pink into her wardrobe.

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182 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:30 PM

nominate 3:24(2)

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183 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:31 PM

"I don't know - it was a pretty dark night. I remember the assailant looking a bit different."

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184 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:32 PM

Terrifying children -- not just for pro se plaintiffs anymore!

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185 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:33 PM

Attorney Jame McDougale (left) was shocked by the courts decision to sanction him along with Adam "Bulletproof" Reposa in Bulletproof's latest shenanigans. Judge Simmons noted that "although Mr. Reposa looks much better in the custom, it does not make it appropriate"

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186 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:33 PM

"You honor - my client won't stop looking at me..."

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187 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:35 PM

"I don't think my client is covered by the Equal Protection Clause, your honor. Can I go now?"

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188 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:35 PM

The cast of Eli Stone learns that the network has finally pulled the plug.

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189 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:40 PM

Attorney found to be in contempt of pork.

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190 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:41 PM

They never told me it was a Kangaroo Court. Boy is my face.

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191 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:41 PM

Ralphie's lawyer listens intently as the judge rules that his client will in fact shoot his eye out.

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192 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:42 PM

Sadly, the Court did not buy Plaintiff's argument that United Steel Workers v. Weber should be overturned because some animals are more equal than others.

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193 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:45 PM

Mr. Davis explains to the Court, that while he is aware that nothing happens when you put a dress on a pig, due diligence required that he at least try it the other way around.
-gd3

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194 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:47 PM

Objection, your Honor, blatant Redskins trolling.

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195 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:47 PM

Sorry about your giant pink client, bro.

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196 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:48 PM

Sadly, Gertie was unable to recover for slander as the Court determined that, despite the best efforts of council, she was in fact a fat, disgusting pig.

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197 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:48 PM

Frat Stud (left) sits in disbelief as the court disregards his "Pigs in my high school used to commit serial murder all the time and then claim that they are incapable of prosecution under state criminal law because they are not human" defense.

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198 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:50 PM

Frat Stud (left) sits in disbelief as the court disregards his "Pigs in my high school used to commit serial murder all the time and then claim that they are incapable of prosecution under state criminal law because they are not human all the time, it was no big deal" defense.

(corrected version)

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199 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:54 PM

"Your honor, we think it's pretty obvious who should get custody of the kids..."

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200 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:55 PM

"Your honor, we think it's pretty obvious who should get custody of the kids..."

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201 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 5:59 PM

Judge: NCR Denied - beer-goggles are not a basis for a finding of mental incapacitation.

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202 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:00 PM

Habeas porkus!

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203 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:01 PM

The other white defendant.

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204 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:02 PM

Attorney Smith representing the police officer in question, your honor.

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205 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:06 PM

Don't pork me, bro!

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206 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:08 PM

Best so far:

3:24
4:01(2)
5:10(2)
5:17

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207 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:09 PM

Perhaps her behavior was a bit extreme, but Helen Jones couldn't bear the thought of showing up in the same poo brown outfit as her lawyer for the fourth day in a row.

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208 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:11 PM

If all these kids weren't watching, I would so do you right now.

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209 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:12 PM

Law and Order, after 19 seasons, finally jumps the shark.

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210 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:13 PM

Petunia Pigford wondered if she'd gone overboard with the hair extensions.

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211 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:13 PM

Awaiting the verdict in the truffle embezzlement trial of the century.

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212 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:14 PM

"For the last time, your Honor, I didn't read the goddamn Morgan case because I was too busy sniffing for truffles."

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213 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:18 PM

On trial for drugs and prostitution, Babe found himself following the path of Feldman, Haim, Diamond and so many other child actors who came before him.

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214 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:18 PM

Best so far:
3:20
3:28
3:39 (2)
4:39 (2)
5:12

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215 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:25 PM

(The longer a lawyer and client are together, the more they look like each other.

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216 Posted by legalmaxim | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:25 PM

"Though he bit his upper lip as hard as he could and tried desperately to look away, how could any lawyer stop daydreaming about THAT client molesting THOSE children seated behind him?"

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217 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:25 PM

As "Judge" Springer gaveled the mock trial to order, Northwestern Law School Dean Van Zandt began to wonder whether he had made the right choice in approving the commencement speaker's request to "do something interesting for the kids" on an otherwise-boring graduation day without asking for specifics first.

Brandy the Pig just smiled; the "piglets" would make their surprise appearance any minute. Hopefully "that stuffy Dean" would be so distracted by the slop bombs that she would be able to pull him into the pig pile. Jerry would pay her extra for that. One thing was certain: her costume's tear-away velcro seams would, once again, come in handy...

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218 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:25 PM

Pig says: "My wife is a slut."

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219 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:26 PM

The secretary from Drew Carey awaits her fate at trial as dozens of 12 year old syndication addicts look on in trepidation

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220 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:26 PM

SUTHERLAND to 190k

221 Posted by Maurice Levy | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:27 PM

Bill desperately wanted to make the HamLaw 100.

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222 Posted by legalmaxim | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:28 PM

Oh, you said NY to 190 when pigs FLY? My mistake. I'll try this case, then. Hampton, you're excused.

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223 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:28 PM

6:25, go rot, you sicko.

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224 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:28 PM

H E R P E S
S U T H E R L A N D
H E R P E S
S U T H E R L A N D
H E R P E S
S U T H E R L A N D

Don't infect me, bro!

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225 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:31 PM

6:28(3) is the best post yet.
"Herpes... Sutherland... Don't infect me, bro."

American Law to 190th on USNWR !!!

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226 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:33 PM

After pondering trial strategy, renowned defense attorney, Robert Shapiro, decides not to place his client on the stand in fear that cross examination may impeach his client’s credibility.

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227 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:33 PM

Exxon Executive Maintains That He Has a Right To Be Represented by An Attorney of his Peers.

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228 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:33 PM

By 2011, the unholy political marriage of PETA and Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio had pretty much guaranteed that public defender Julian Basker wouldn't be demanding a jury trial any time in the foreseeable future.

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229 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:41 PM

The ABA's diversity initiatives are finally having a tangible impact in the courtroom.

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230 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:42 PM

The capacity hearing then went into recess earlier than anyone had anticipated . . .

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231 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:44 PM

"It wasn't until take your daughter to work day that the farmer started to suspect his wife was unfaithful."

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232 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:47 PM

"Your Honor - the baby backs my client possesses are NOT child pornography!"

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233 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:47 PM

What's that you're wearing? Its... its... its intoxicating.

- Brought to you by Taco Bell's New Bacon Club Chalupa

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234 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:49 PM

"Your Honor, of course my client can sue for medical malpractice for misdiagnosis of hoof and mouth disease!"

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235 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:50 PM

I swear your honor, this is Michael Jackson, the defendant. And as you will soon see, all these children in the courtroom will attest that he did not touch them inappropriately.

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236 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:50 PM

Sadly, all that the lawyer could think about was how good she was going to smell on the electric chair.

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237 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:55 PM

Unfornately for Kermit, Miss Piggy could never get the saying "food is not love" quite right.

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238 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:58 PM

Upon information and belief, the defendant, Mr. Big Bad Wolf, did on or about the 14th of this month blow on my client's house in the following manner...

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239 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 6:58 PM

No, I said Brioni damit!

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240 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 7:01 PM

. . . the whole store's got the flu. So its either wear the leather jacket, which i knoooow you hate, or this . . .

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241 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 7:13 PM

The suprise appearance of the "missing" victim threw quite a wrench in the proscutor's "pig-in-a-blanket" theory of how the defendant had disposed of the body.

- Transfer

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242 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 7:20 PM

A grand jury can indict a ham sandwich.

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243 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 7:20 PM

6:50 (2) is very funny.
3:20 ain't bad either.

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244 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 7:25 PM

A look in on Ms. Piggy's options back-dating trial.

245 Posted by kawaii | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 7:34 PM

Prominent defense attorney, Law Lawyerson (l), is unsure how to tell the court that his client (pictured right) is kosher.

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246 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 7:36 PM

"Your honor, now can I present the responding officer as my next witness"

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247 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 7:37 PM

"Oink Vey!"

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248 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 7:52 PM

7:01, awesome!

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249 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 8:01 PM

3:44 needs to be in the finals. Well done!

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250 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 8:06 PM

Lawyer: I should not have gone to UPenn State Philly.

Pig: You went to that TTT?

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251 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 8:10 PM

"Oh Kermie, you look so nice in your new suit."

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252 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 8:14 PM

this contest ended at 7:01

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253 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 8:20 PM

Attorney John Walker amazed at Judge's decision to rejcect an insanity defense in third grade teacher Miss. Pignauski, on trial for allegedly harrasing 7 of her students.

Walker was quoted as saying "If pig customs don't make you crazy what does?"

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254 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 8:20 PM

"I don't feel the need to explain myself."

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255 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 8:21 PM

Sutherland Asbill & Loyola.

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256 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 8:22 PM

Sutherland Asbill & Loyola.

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257 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 8:51 PM

6:33(1) needs to be in the finals. Good work.

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258 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:01 PM

what are "sutherlands" and "asbills" and what do othey have to do with this pic?

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259 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:04 PM

Above: Karl and Mrs.Rove in court. The pair were picked up early yesterday afternoon by D.C. Metro police after reports of a pig and "white guy with a bad hairpiece" engaging in "amorous" activity in the back of a 1987 Nissan Sentra. The couple apparently regularly dresses up to "spice things up."

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260 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:08 PM

Above: Karl and Mrs.Rove in court. The pair were picked up early yesterday afternoon by D.C. Metro police after reports of a pig and "white guy with a bad hairpiece" engaging in "amorous" activity in the back of a 1987 Nissan Sentra. The couple apparently regularly dresses up to "spice things up."

-J.Azam

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261 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:14 PM

"Your honor, Rule 11 sanctions are completely out of the question. I was merely being ironic, and I misinterpreted the charges to read 'porkmonger.'"

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262 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:15 PM

Jewish Lawyer to Fried Pork Frank

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263 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:15 PM

She's the firm's hot junior associate Your Honor. It is amazing what she'll do for a good review.

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264 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:20 PM

In a fleeting daydream, Kermit envisions himself a hotshot litigator, impressing his toughest critics. And of course Miss Piggy digs it.

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265 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:21 PM

At first befuddled by his client's sudden transformation into a pig, Ralston quickly remembered that he'd seen this in an episode of Eli Stone.

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266 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:23 PM

Karl Rove is....Still defending a Pig.

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267 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:23 PM

After spending 180 thousand dollars and 3 years at a T10 school to be able to commit his life to social justice, Bill had his first client as a public defender.

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268 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:45 PM

Yes Your Honor, I know he was great in the Shining.

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269 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:49 PM

"Why are you wearing that pig suit?"

"Why are you wearing that lawyer suit?"

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270 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 9:56 PM

Prosecutor Gary Clarkson silently hopes that Judge Henderson would not notice his attempt to substitute a stand-in for the missing victim in the big bestiality trial.

271 Posted by Isiah | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 10:17 PM

No, I wasn't drunk your honor; I was hungry.

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272 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 10:28 PM

Harold Rove (Karl Rove's second cousin) represents Dianna Jessop, a member of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, in a fight to get her 4 children back. Since Child Protective Services took her children, Jessop has discarded her homemade ankle-length dress for more comfortable attire.

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273 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 10:33 PM

"Why, WHY did I let opposing counsel pick wardrobe?!"

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274 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 10:39 PM

The last time the judge asked Roger Phipps where he went to law school, his response ended up on some trashy blog and his alma mater disowned him. This time, with a news photographer just inches away, he bit his tongue -- determined not to look like a fool.


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275 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 11:01 PM

Now realizing full well that his choice of wardrobe for his client had backfired, and that all eyes were upon him to rescue the case from certain disaster, Ronald did what any reasonable attorney would do under such intense pressure. Make shit up.

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276 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 11:20 PM

ha. Rove!!!! YES!

277 Posted by Harvey Birdman | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 11:23 PM

Plaintiff's attorney E. Fudd at once realized that B.B. Wolfe had uncovered the fatal flaw in his case...the house was made of straw...

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278 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 11:48 PM

Whoops. My mistake -- I thought this was kangaroo court.

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279 Posted by guest | Permalink Thursday, May 1, 2008 11:49 PM

10:39 = brilliant!

Also great: 4:46 (2), 6:50(2)

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280 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 12:15 AM

"And do you see the person you described as a 'pink pig' sitting in the court room today?"

"Yes, sir, sitting right there."

"Please let the record reflect that the witness has pointed the defendant."

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281 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 12:23 AM

People always told Sally to dress how she wants people to perceive her...No one could have ever suspected that she had a plushie fetish.

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282 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 12:27 AM

And then, your honor, in a dastardly attempt to demean my client, the defendant told her to squeal like a pig.

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283 Posted by inter alia | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 12:30 AM

Many attorneys are finding that acid helps them cope with job related stress.

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284 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 12:35 AM

"Your honor, I'd like to turn the cross-examination over to senior counsel"

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285 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 1:22 AM

I like to see that there are plenty of people still at work right now to comment on this. I'd like to take this opportunity to echo earlier comments that the caption should really be reflecting something the judge just said. Neither the guy nor the bunny appear to be talking.

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286 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 2:38 AM

Caption (witness testifying)

That's who I got herpes from. The F*ing Easter Bunny. B*tch said she had some good tail...

P. Escobar strikes again.

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287 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 2:41 AM

I'd LOVE to see her fur!

P. Escobar in da house

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288 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 2:44 AM

Hells yes I stole the 7up.

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289 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 2:46 AM

Damnit.....I f*cked a fattie again, didn't I?

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290 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 2:48 AM

F*CK YOU CHARLOTTE. F*CK YOUR WEB TOO

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291 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 2:50 AM

Guess what the other 2 little pigs are doing? Blowing his house down!

NEO

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292 Posted by guest | Permalink Friday, May 2, 2008 4:30 AM

Best so far:
3:24 (2) "pro bono"
3:28 "Res ipsa porquitur"
6:18 child actors
7:01 Vinny/"whole store got the flu"

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