Poop in a hat right before the test and during the break.

You can't lose!

second

second

I sat for the California Bar Exam a few years back at a Laptop location. Although I had earplugs in, I noticed commotion behind me at one point during the exam on the morning of the second day. The morning of the third day, I noticed the person in front of me was missing, and a person two rows in back of me was missing, and never came to the third day. At lunch on the third day, I struck up a conversation with one of the security guards, who said that the two people had been caught cheating, and were removed, one by use of some force. The person behind me was not actually a guy, but was a girl posing as a guy for her male friend, who paid her to take the exam for him. She apparently used a wig, taped her hooters down, and used his i.d. to get in. Worse part? She was already a practicing attorney. The girl in front of me was caught sharing answers to the MBE in a restroom, by leaving the number and corresponding letter to MBE questions (it was A-E multiple choice) on a tampon left behind a stall.

Not exactly a horror story for me, but shows how stupid you have ot be to have to cheat on a friggin bar exam. If you are that dumb, how'd you even get to the point of having graduated law school?

1:06 - Great story. I thought that only happened with the SAT.

Guys in my high school used to write coded messages on tampons in the bathroom stall all the time, it was no big deal.

-INEVITABLE FRAT STUD

My horror story is as follows:

I sat for the bar. I passed. I had to practice law for a living.

This website is addicting. :(

New Hampshire was a really nice place to take the bar. I'm admitted there, but have never really practiced there (I'm in Mass.). The test is administered in conference rooms in a state office building. They put you in big comfortable leather chairs, and are very friendly. Not bad at all.

Several years ago at the Javits center a number of us sat in the Javits "Annex", a canvas covered temporary building equiped, or so we thought, with HVAC.

The first morning it was freezing, but it gradually heated up because, lo and behold, the AC went out and instead it warmed up to a balmy 90 degrees or so by early afternoon.

The second day was better and more consistent temperature-wise, but a Mr. Softie truck parked outside blarring that damn theme music for what had to have been 45-90 mins. Unbelievably annoying and hard to believe it was coincidental.

People were visibly agitated and many complained.

Thank goodness, I still managed to pass.

The bar sucks, but the studying/worrying before it is much worse. I passed the Cal bar but will be taking the bar in my home state in a couple weeks and have only studied a few days (I've been too tired to study after work). So know that there are others who haven't studied nearly enough and that if you've been doing nothing but studying all summer, you're probably in a lot better shape than others taking the exam (like me!). Good luck!

1:18 is right. Climate control issues are a frequent problem.

Dress in layers, so you can adjust to different test conditions.

I'm cut 'n' pasting my post from the other day, 'cuz it's more appropriate here

At 3 a.m. on the second night of my three-day, two-state bar exam adventure, I woke up to find someone had cut the screen to my living room window, and was in the process of crawling inside. He ran off when I entered the room, but all I could think was, "My God! He's breaking into my dwelling at night with the intent to commit a felony therein!!!" But then it occurred to me that he may have honestly, yet unreasonably, believed that I owed him $50. Given that this was the first thing on my mind, I passed.

1:13(2) - comment of the day.

Taking the NY Bar at the "Pier" (Passenger Ship Terminal) was horror story enough.

No, 1:22 is the comment of the day.

Hilarious!

there is really no need to freak about the ny exam. according to the bar examiners website in july 2007 first time takers from ABA law schools (the majority of takers) pass at about an 87% rate - i think this is higher than the MBE (which was a complete joke).

From an old-timer here, I took the NY bar in 1985 at the pier. I come home from a short after-bar exam vacation to a letter from the authorities telling me that they had lost the multistate portion of my bar exam. No problem, though, because as a special favor I wouldn't have to pay to take the exam again.

Turns out that they lost the multistate portions of everyone's exam who sat at that location.

there is really no need to freak about the ny exam. according to the bar examiners website in july 2007 first time takers from ABA law schools (the majority of takers) pass at about an 87% rate - i think this is higher than the MBE (which was a complete joke).

1:13(2) is sad but true

bar exam was fine as long as you put in the time to study during the summer. it's really not that hard if you prepared.

It does not get much worse than the 2005 Louisiana Bar exam takers who were required to re-take portions of the exam months after they initial sat for the exam because the various bar exam graders lost their exams during Katrina.

I failed as a lateral to a new state--there's my horror story.

1:14 - This web site is addicting what? Even if you pass the bar, you fail.

1:22 is a genius because I say so.

I encourage all of you exam takers to fart as loudly as you can during the first few minutes of the exam. Farts have been funny for centuries, see, e.g., the Caterbury Tales, and you'll lighten the mood (if not the air) for everyone.

My bar exam horror story:

A girl at my table shat herself within the first five minutes of the test. She continued to do so throughout the day and would occasionally get up to go to the restroom, which would only cause the stench to waft my way over and over again.

Thankfully, I brought extra earplugs. They came in handy as nose plugs.

1:43 -- speaking from experience, taking the bar exam to relocate to another jurisdiction sucks and should not be necessary.

http://www.abanet.org/cpr/mjp/comm2_usg.html

Mine is an un-horror story. I took the Vuh-ginia Baah, where you have to wear a suit and tie (but sneakers are OK). I was freaked out. I got my exam, read all the essay questions, and decided there was not one I could answer. I freaked out more.
So, I decided I needed a break, got up and walked out the the large, stadium, bathrooms. I walked in, and saw about 7 dudes puking, some in stalls, some in urinals. That's when I realized that I was actually in pretty good shape. So I walked back to my table, and finished the exam. And passed. Not really so bad I don't think. And I can't imagine ANYTHING that would make me decide to puke in a urinal. Awful.

In preparing for the July '07 exam, Barbri told us, repeatedly, that it was not worth the trouble to put significant effort into studying Commerical Paper or Secured Transactions. I believe they said both subjects combined had been tested less than 6 times in the preceding decades, and hadn't showed up at all for a very long time. I followed that advice. I bet you can tell where this is going.

Essay 3 (of 10): Exclusively Secured Transactions.
Essay 8: Principally Commerical Paper.

I spent the next 4 months convinced I had failed the bar exam. But, as it would turn out, I passed. The end.

1:48 went to my high school and knows how to do it up right

-FART STUD

1:53, are you Unky 4L?

Scored 182 on the MBE - Failed California.

Good luck everyone!

I don't see what the big deal is. Every attorney I know passed the bar.

The first day of my bar exam back in '05 was the MBE. I thought it was hard, and that I had failed. I cried hysterically that night. The next day was essays, which were super easy. My MBE score was high enough that I could have skipped two essays and done a half assed job on the rest and passed. The funny thing about this, though, is that I'm not exceptionally bright. Accordingly, take heart and put your time in ; you too will pass.

1:59 - that is terrifying. what happened, if you don't mind?

Guys in the inner city take the bar and pass all the time.

Guys in the inner city take the bar and pass all the time.

I didn't study hard enough. I was only studying about 8 hours a day. The essays were real hard that year.

- 1:59.

That's solid, 1:53.

When I was taking the NY bar exam at the Javits Center, a girl two tables ahead of me stayed seated and continued working on her exam past the call of time on every single portion of the exam. The proctors never saw her. At one point, another test taker nearby confronted her and she just ignored him and kept working. A few weeks later, I got a call from the bar asking me about her... apparently they had gotten notified and were calling everyone who had been seated in her vicinity to verify the story. I do not know what happened after that, but I hope she was failed and not allowed to take it again.

My sandwich leaked through it bag during the morning session last July. Also, most of the people I know from law school passed the bar. That, to me, is a horror story.

Just dont bring i highlighters with those little tabs. Took cal bar and mid way through my first essay on day one, i got a Rule 12 ethics violation for bringing in "unauthorized paper". apparently I could have written something on the tabs at the end of the highlighter and cheated. I freaked but passed.

Just dont bring i highlighters with those little tabs. Took cal bar and mid way through my first essay on day one, i got a Rule 12 ethics violation for bringing in "unauthorized paper". apparently I could have written something on the tabs at the end of the highlighter and cheated. I freaked but passed.

I took the MO bar, which meant I had to travel to Jefferson City, MO for two days. What a friggin' nightmare. Jeff City = hellhole.

I got my penis caught in a slinky when I took the bar. It took about an hour to get it out. It was hell.

Lat, the story I heard from a BarBri higher-up was that the crazy lady you mentioned above was screaming "I am a covenant and running with the land," over and over...

not surprised about people pooping themselves, though it wasn't because of nerves, IMHO; it was probably all the caffeine the'd been drinking. More than 2 bottles in 4 hours will cause, ahem, the runs. And think how much you drank then.

Yeah, bar exams. good times.

I got the runs on the second day of the NY exam. Went to the bathroom every 30 minutes. Quit about halfway done with my last essay. Handed it in. Passed.

Oh, and I went drinking after the first day, before playing softball in Central Park.

Virginia Bar horror story: recognizing the Salem Civic Center in one of Borat's more (in)famous scenes.

My friend of the family has been proctoring the Washington State bar for years. Apparently, one year a test taker was so nervous that she had a lengthy bout of diarrhea. Undeterred, she continued to take the exam . . . in a toilet stall . . . while the proctor sat in the bathroom. I wonder if she passed.

2:08 - Just curious what did you say when they called you asking about the cheater?

I guess I'm superstitious, but the morning of each exam day (we had three), I would go out and kill a hobo with a hammer.

when i took mcle, the clock i the room wasn't working right. now, most people aren't worried about the mcle clock, but the official policy requires that there be a visible clock. well, one person near the front of the large the room cared, and she convinced the proctors that the exam couldn't start until she had a clock she could see (her watch was a prohibited digital watch). After a few minutes, a disgusted fellow test-taker from the back of the room bounded loudly to the front of the room, slammed his analogue watch down on the table in front of her, and said, "here, can we please start the stupid test now."

Not a horror story, but close enough.

'05 PA Bar: (and no, this isn't taken from the Crim. Barbri lecture) Sat down, guy sitting next to me starts talking about how he DID NOT take Barbri. He thought it wasn't worth it. Instead, he studied his outlines from law school, he says. He then proceeds to ask me about the format of the test. I wonder what happened to that guy...

Not my nightmare, but this happened to the person to my right. 2 hours, 4 essays. Each essay in a separate color-coded book.

20 minutes - I finish my first essay. Person to my right highlighting in first essay book.

45 minutes - I finish my second essay. Person to my right outlining first essay (presumably) on scratch paper.

1 hour, 15 minutes - I finish my third essay. Person to my right writing first essay.

1 hour, 35 minutes - I finish my fourth essay and contemplate where I will get lunch from. Person to my right completing first essay.

1 hour, 50 minutes - My tummy is grumbling because lunch approaching. Person to my right completing second essay.

1 hour, 57 minutes - Maybe I will get chips and a cookie with lunch. Person to my right completing third essay.

2 hours, 0 minutes - Nah, I will get a giant rice krispy square instead of a cookie. Person to my right scribbling maddeningly on fourth essay.

2 hours, 1 minute - I put all my pencils, etc back in clear zip lock bag and wait for proctor to collect essay books. Person to my right discretely scribbling maddeningly on fourth essay.

2 hours, 2 minutes - Off to lunch. Person to my right eerily calm.

Next day - I take MBE. Seat on my right empty.

1:13 - comment of the day? more like comment of the year.

To those worried about the bar exam: There are some indescribably idiotic people with law licenses. They don't know much of anything, including and especially the law. Get your basics down, compose yourself, and you'll be fine. (From some of the posts, it appears you may want to limit your caffeine intake also.)

1:59 = Bullshit. Do not believe.

For NY, at least, Bar Bri said they have never had a student score 140 (raw) or above and not pass. Ever.

1. About a week before barbri ended I accidentally knocked some guy's laptop to the floor. Obviously I felt horrible since even if I could pay for the computer if it broke, it would have been too late for him to submit a claim to the bar people to download softtest on another computer. The guy was surprisingly calm about it and said his computer was okay. He ended up sitting behind me during the actual exam and for the 2 essay days I was so nervous that his computer would break down and he'd kill me.

2. After the first day of essays I told my attorney friend that there weren't any crossover questions. He said, "maybe you just totally missed them." I cried.

The guy sitting at my table with me got one line off on his scantron sheet and had gone a good long way before he noticed. Then he tried to erase, but he apparently had one of those pencils with the cheap-ass eraser that doesn't work, so his whole scantron sheet looked like a big black smudgy mess. There was no way a machine could have scored that thing. I felt bad because I had a pink pearl eraser that I happily would have lent him, but I didn't notice this was happening until almost the end of the session. There's no way he passed...

2:13 -- as a fellow MoBar member, I'll second that. The Ramada where they held the bar was this dingy maze of a motel/conference room. In 2006 there was a huge power outage in St. Louis the week before the bar so a bunch of kids ended up living in that motel for the entire preceding week so they could have AC. I stayed at a Hampton Inn that set out a giant jar of pickled eggs at the continental breakfast. Yuck.

2:13, are you suggesting there a parts of Missouri that aren't hell holes? As though St. Loser, Misery is a cultural mecca? As though the state is not one of the worst geographic locations in the nation? And the weather might be the worst on earth.

2:36 - They say that in every course. They know that a calm test taker is better than a worried test taker, but it's more bullshit from Bar/Bri. People with High MBEs and low essays fail just the same as people with low MBEs and high essays.

Why do you think Bar-Bri doesn't release their stats. They claim to teach 80% of the bar takers, so of course they have people with over a 140 MBE fail an exam.

-1:59

2:26, they asked me if I had seen someone writing past time, if so, where was that person seated, and how many times I had seen it happening. I told them what I could remember.

2:28 wins. No contest.

Boring NY story:

Sat next to a normal person for July '07 NY Bar. He was cute. I offered him some of my candy and during breaks we made small talk about rents in Manhattan. Both of us were calm and completed the exam within the allotted time, despite both of us having experienced laptop problems at some point during Day 1. I passed, he probably did too (don't remember his name).

Tip: bring sandwich/simple lunch. Food around Javitz sucks. Oh and a sweater in case it gets cold.

2:45, you owe me a minute of my life

1. Yes, bring your own snacks and lunch. Not only does the food around the Javitts suck, anything decent is a longer walk than is worth it. You'll spend more time walking to and from than eating.

2. When I took the NY bar at the Javitts (I forget which day of the exam), halfway through the morning, I had to poop. I went to the nearest men's room to find that even though all of the urinals were free, every stall was occupied by some popped-collar, baseball-cap-wearing douchebag standing there urinating. I really had to poop. If the men's room hadn't been the one in the test-taking room, I probably would have yelled at these idiots. Leave the stalls for people who have to sit down. Use the urinals for urinating. Asshats.

NJ has only 6 questions on the written part. Evidence questions, con law question, property questions, crim pro, torts etc. 3 questions in am, lunch, 3 questions in pm.

Am session has a question that involved a dying man telling his priest, his ex-wife and several other witnesses how he wanted his estate handled. He also left notes and other evidence of his intent. It was the evidence question.

Standing around at lunch time with friends and one of them says "how about that con law question." Everyone looks at him and says there was no con law question. He still doesn't get it and says it was the question involving the dying guy and right to life. Everyone got real quiet. He totally blew a question, and no, he did not pass.

NJ has only 6 questions on the written part. Evidence questions, con law question, property questions, crim pro, torts etc. 3 questions in am, lunch, 3 questions in pm.

Am session has a question that involved a dying man telling his priest, his ex-wife and several other witnesses how he wanted his estate handled. He also left notes and other evidence of his intent. It was the evidence question.

Standing around at lunch time with friends and one of them says "how about that con law question." Everyone looks at him and says there was no con law question. He still doesn't get it and says it was the question involving the dying guy and right to life. Everyone got real quiet. He totally blew a question, and no, he did not pass.

Make your fellow test takers feel good about themselves: before the big test turn to your neighbor and worriedly ask him or her whether contracts is on the exam.

NJ has only 6 questions on the written part. Evidence questions, con law question, property questions, crim pro, torts etc. 3 questions in am, lunch, 3 questions in pm.

Am session has a question that involved a dying man telling his priest, his ex-wife and several other witnesses how he wanted his estate handled. He also left notes and other evidence of his intent. It was the evidence question.

Standing around at lunch time with friends and one of them says "how about that con law question." Everyone looks at him and says there was no con law question. He still doesn't get it and says it was the question involving the dying guy and right to life. Everyone got real quiet. He totally blew a question, and no, he did not pass.

For Javitz takers:

It was freeeeezing in the area i took it in so bring a sweatshirt, bring earplugs b/c the person near you will be eating something or there will be someone coughing, there's a mcdonalds a few blocks away for lunch. holllla

Boring NJ Story (really, is there any other kind?):

I studied like a manman for the exam. 10-12 hours a day, 6 or 7 days a week. BarBri and PMBR. About two weeks before the exam, I still wasn't getting any more than 50% correct on the PMBR practice exams, and basically flipped out. You could call it a nervous breakdown. I didn't study for the last two weeks, just tried to relax. Ok, I was catatonic on a couch.

Sat at the front of the room in the Meadowlands Convention Center. Totally cliche, but of course the guy at my table was a complete jabberjaw who wouldn't shut up about how much he studied, how ready he was, etc. Nervous jackass. (I know, unlike me, who had gone insane earlier.) I tried to humor him and remain calm.

The first day of the exam was the MBE. I was convinced I failed miserably. Really, I thought there was no way in hell I got over 100. Figured I was done for. Then, the second day, came the essays. They were so easy they could have been a practical joke. Other NJ takers can attest to this. So I walked out thinking, hmmm, maybe it'll all even out and I'll squeak by.

In the end, I did just fine on the MBE, and passed easily. Advice to all is just study, study, study and remain calm. You'll do fine. (And if you're taking the NJ Bar, just concentrate on the MBE all summer and practice NJ essays only the last week. The NJ essays are laughable.)

[End boring NJ story and the worst post on this thread. Thank you.]

Does anyone know how many questions NJ has on the written part?

2:53 - you should make them feel shitty about themselves. Turn to them and say, "Can you believe they added Admiralty and Sharia Law to the exam this year?"

2:59 .. although that information is often difficult to come buy, i read somewhere recently that there were 6

correction at 3:01: *come by

2:41(1) -

It's not all bad. It may just be flyover territory to anyone from the coasts, but STL is a great place to live... as long as you stay out of the north side. Or the east side. Oh and don't go too far south.

I will concede, however, that the weather sucks ~30/52 weeks a year, unless you like stifling humidity.

- 2:13

2:28 - Bar exam . . . Secrets.

I love it.

Took AZ Bar in July 07. Passed. Still no official admittance form 2/08. Suddenly an email stating the Committee on Exams had considered an investigation becuase I had my Barbri DVD in my laptop upon entering the exam area (I admit I forgot to take it out the night before)...evidently was confiscated during lunch and they had failed to inform me (whether it was still in my dvd player or i had removed it and placed it aside with other materials in a ziplock under my chair i dont remember)...the bar exam software locks out every other program anyway! much less how would i find the proper section of the supplemetary lecture anyway without someone seeing i was watching the barbri dvd during the exam.

i had created an appearance of impropriety for having prohibited materials in the testing area (which i technically did minus intent)...i was admonished this was bad but admitted after they firgured out their software works to block dvd players.

moral - dont bring prohibited materials into the testing area, even accidentally. check your dvd drive the night before.

1. I took the NJ exam right after the NY exam at some tacky Romanesque banquet hall somewhere in northern NJ. I can't remember the name of the town, but it was corporate park hell. Since I lived in Manhattan at the time, I opted to rent a car and drive to the town, stay in a hotel the night before, and be fresh and rested, rather than try to drive over to NJ that morning. I stayed in a Wellesley Inn & Suites (maybe it was in Whippany?) because it was cheaper than the other hotels in the area without being a dump. Boy, was that a mistake. I should have sprung for the nicer hotel, but I passed.

2. When taking the MPT at the Javits, I somehow either mixed-up or misheard the amount of time we had in that session. So, I started answering as much as I possibly could thinking I had only 15 minutes left. After furiously typing my answer, the proctor said, "Twenty minutes left" or something like that. I could have taken my time, rather than trying to put down as much an answer as I could in a short time. At that point, I was so exhausted from the stress of that moment, I filled in a bit extra and just said screw it. I passed anyway.

Last year in Albany someone put an MBE book in the toilet bowl of the restroom - it was sealed in a large plastic bag. I think the perp must have had a room in the hotel where the exam was taking place and was able to visit the restroom when no guards were around. Not sure how, but he got busted!

True story from the MA bar in 2001 (happened to my friend.) It's not a horror story, but a tale of hope and perserverance.

Apparently in MA you get seated in alphabetical order. My friend ends up seated next to a woman whom he finds very attractive (and eerily calm, but he ascribes that to her having smoked an entire pack of cigarettes before entering the exam room). During the breaks he made small talk, and eventually got her number. Shortly after the exam, he loses her number and feels like an idiot.

Fast forward to the swearing-in a few months later. Again, everyone has to be lined up in alphabetical order, and her name immediately precedes his so she's standing in front of him, with her mother. He basically asks for her number and digits, with Mom standing right there. After some pestering, he convinces her to go out with him.

Current status: they are happily married, with a kid. :)

And I heard that "covenant running with the land story" about NY too (I heard it in 2001, allegedly it happened "a year or two" before). I also heard a story, I forget which state, where someone freaked out and yelled "I am the fruit of the poisonous tree!" and ran out, never to be seen again.

2:28 - best comment of the day

3:08 here. Meant to say "e-mail and digits." He did not ask her for her number and fingers.

2:13/3:03

I've lived in St. Louis. And I've lived in a lot of places, including on the side of a mountain with no electricity or indoor plumbing when I was in the Peace Corps. St. Louis is still the shittiest place I've ever lived.

That said, I loved Blueberry Hill. Moreover, I'm glad people like it though because it means they're not here.

P.S. "here" means just about anywhere that's not there.

Louisina Bar 1999. In Louisiana there are three days of testing, all essay, no MBE. You are allowed to fail 2 exams and still pass the bar. A friend of mine decided that he would just not study for the Code I exam, the first test on the first day, and so he did not show up until it was time for the Code II exam at 10:00.

He was informed upon arrival, that mandatory check in occurred at 8 AM the day before and since he was not there for it, he would have to wait until February.

A California friend of mine signed up for the CA bar; they cashed his check and proceeded to send him registration information; he spent the summer studying 10-14 hours a day. 2 weeks before the bar called him and told him they had not received his Character and Fitness application. Turns out he had filled out his application online and hit "Save" - but not "Submit." He had to wait until February.

Cal '98, I recall a fellow in Sacramento two or three seats down getting descended on by three proctors all at once. Quickly, one could see he had a index card with a couple of small notes on it.

The conversation was something like this:

"what's this?" says the proctor

"it's a timing sheet. I just made notes to track time." says the kid

"you can't have notes with writing"

"It's a timing sheet, I WROTE DOWN SOME NUMBERS to keep track of time." The guy is starting to get really agitated, looking around the room for support.

"Look, I think you need to close up your book..."

"ITS A FUCKING TIMING SHEET JESUSHCHRIST I WROTE DOWN SOME FUCKING NUMBERS JESUSDONTDOTHISTOME." He's shouting like that kid in the exorcist and half the room is staring.

The other proctors look at the sheet, and one says, "Oh, yeah. Okay, I see that now. Sorry about that."

How that guy ever got back to work I don't know. I walked past the desk later and that's exactly what it was.

AZ 07 again. studied 14 hours a day from graduation through barbri and pmbr. made flashcards, read and highlighted outlines by pool...

first day essays - not terrible - got home, remembered in the crim law essay that losing an eye could be considered mayhem (the collest named crime)

second day - MBE's were incredibly easy. i ended up with a scaled 153. so i did do really well on them.

study hard, stay calm, you'll pass.

AZ 07 again. studied 14 hours a day from graduation through barbri and pmbr. made flashcards, read and highlighted outlines by pool...

first day essays - not terrible - got home, remembered in the crim law essay that losing an eye could be considered mayhem (the collest named crime)

second day - MBE's were incredibly easy. i ended up with a scaled 153. so i did do really well on them.

study hard, stay calm, you'll pass.

3:03, kudos for lovin' the Conan as much as I.

-2:28.

NY. i sat behind an asshole that some of my classmates had summered with. they described him as an annoying douchebag.

after we finished the impossible NY law multiple choice questions (think i got maybe 2 of 50 right, they say 10 right is outstanding), douchebag turned around and said "wow, that wasn't bad at all - i don't think there's a single one i didn't know"

i nearly punched him out

3:31 -- I think we all went to school with that kid. He should die of gonorrhea and rot in hell.

Horror story with happy ending from Ohio 1997 bar -- Bar is 2.5 days - with last day being an additional three hours to complete six essays, given 2 at a time (you have 1 hour to complete each pair, dividing up time however you want). On the last day, sometime early in hour 2 (or maybe even late in hour 1), a very pregnant woman a few tables away starts going into labor. She fights through it and continues on until hour 3, where she stays for only a few minutes (basically long enough to write cursory answers to each of the last pair of essays), and then calls for a proctor, who helps her stagger out and call an ambulance.

Happy ending- she passed and we all met her and family at swearing-in ceremony a few months later.

If she can pass, so can you.

not me, i went to school with popped collar frat boy douches pissing in the shitter.

I took the New Jersey bar exam immediately after the New York Bar Exam and had the unfortunate experience of sitting next two two future BIGLAW punks straight out of central casting. One was a most heinously ugly chick and her friend who she kept calling Dmitri. All they did for 20 minutes prior to the exam, within earshot of 2 tables each way, was mock New Jersey, the auditorium (in Secaucus) and comment about how easy the test would be and wonder aloud why they were even there. This was 2001. Well, as you can imagine the NJ bar was much harder than the NY bar and I stole peeks at butt-ugly and Dmitri during the exam and noticed their expressions go from bad to worse. After the first break butt-ugly didn't return. Shortly thereafter Dmitri left. I passed and went on to BIGLAW as well.

NJ does not allow waive ins.

I TOOK THE BAR IN ALBANY AT A FLEABAG HOTEL OUTSIDE TOWN.

TVERY IMPORTANT TIP!!!! ORDER LUNCH THE NIGHT BEFORE TO BE READY FOR YOU WHEN YOU GET TO THE RESTAURANT BECAUSE AT LUNCH BREAK THE RESTAURANT WILL BE A MOB SCENE.

THAT AND RUB ONE OUT IMMEDIATELY BEFORE THE EXAM. CLEARS THE MIND.

I took the bar several years ago, but I hear that the power went out during the middle of the exam last year in Utah. Since law students and lawyers are so laid back and easy going, I'm sure everyone took it in stride and no one complained... Sure...

CA, Summer 2006. dumbasses made me bring a floppy drive, so i had to buy an external, and to test it out, I initialized a disk. Forgot to remove disk, showed proctor on the first day when I discovered it, she said she was going to have to "report" me, and I would have to talk to examiners, I managed to stay calm, later in the day she told me it wasn't a problem, I passed, was sworn in, etc.

So yeah, check your drives.

JT's bar story is as follows:

After enjoying a rendezvous with four of the finer ladies in the Javits Center, JT proceeded to dominate the bar exam. Once complete - two hours early, natch - JT advised the proctor that the essays need not be graded, as each was nothing short of a paragon. The proctor, in his infinite foolishness, told JT that paragon meant "an unusually large pearl." JT then placed the proctor in a rear naked choke hold.

for the love of god can anyone tell me how many questions NJ has on the written part??

i'm taking NJ.

i think historically it has 7 essays...the 6 MBE subjects + Civ Pro.

3:33 we all went, or are going, to school with such a douche

3:51 -

the joke only works once

-2:59

3:36 - "Well, as you can imagine the NJ bar was much harder than the NY bar "

Not in 2004 it wasn't. The NJ exam was a breeze by comparison. No multi-subject essays. The tort question is the tort question, the crim law question is the crim law question.

And if you can't figure out which area of law it is, it is probably con law. Or so said BarBri.

Two guys are camping in Indonesia when a tiger suddenly roars and begins to claw and chew its way into their tent. The first guy heads for the door when he notices that his buddy is putting on a pair of running shoes. The first guy says, “man, there’s no way you’re outrunning that tiger, even with shoes on.” The second guy responds, “I don’t have to outrun the tiger, I just have to outrun you.”

This story was my inspiration for studying for the 2005 NY bar exam; I don’t have to outscore everybody, just the LLMs.

I attended the BarBri classes, spent maybe an hour looking over the material, and then spent three days before the exam reviewing my class notes. It was a pretty relaxing summer. Although I regularly attended the review classes, I missed the trusts and estate material. Everyone said that material was shit, so I didn’t bother to watch the video, planning instead to study the material from the books.

Fast forward to the first day of the NY bar. I’ve always been pretty lucky with tests, so I was reasonably calm and confident. I got about halfway through the NY multiple choice questions when I came upon a question about a last will and testament. The blood drained from face, my skin got clammy, and I felt a strong desire to puke. I had forgotten to study the trusts and estates material, at all. Just slipped my mind. I had a very strong premonition that one of the morning’s essays would be on trust and estates, and I was overwhelmed with a sense of being totally fucked. Feeling totally fucked does not help one take a multiple choice exam.

None of the morning’s essays were on trusts and estates, and I spent the lunch break in my car, chain smoking camels and cramming trusts and estates like my life depended on it. My 45 minutes of cramming did very little to assuage my sense of being totally fucked.

Sure enough, one of the afternoon essays was on trusts and estates. I followed the advice I had been given, setting forth a completely incorrect legal standard, and then analyzing the application of that fictitious legal standard to the facts. I see this all the time now that I practice law.

I passed the exam. Sometimes it is better to be lucky than to be good.

My advice for the bar: (1) if you smoke then wear a nicotine patch, it keeps you from jonesing (plus nicotine helps block stress-induced inhibition of short-term and long-term memory); (2) on the essays, as in life, it is better to say something generally true than exactly false (i.e. know when to shut up); and (3) just be cool – more than likely you will pass, and if failing the bar is the worst thing that ever happens to you then count your blessings.

Good luck.

I turned the entire area around my seat into The Chamber of Farts. Mmmmm, breakfast burrito!

NY 2002. I remember sitting down, and then my deskmate sits next to me, and we still had plenty of time, so I remarked to this guy that generally everyone seems to be pretty calm, no screaming, etc. And he says, funny, he just saw someone throwing up in a garbage can in the john.

Oh, and I passed.

"setting forth a completely incorrect legal standard, and then analyzing the application of that fictitious legal standard to the facts. I see this all the time now that I practice law."

lol.

"i'm taking NJ.

i think historically it has 7 essays...the 6 MBE subjects + Civ Pro. "

I don't see how this is possible. I am taking DE/NJ and my "copy" of the NJ Conviser has shit like Zoning and Commercial Paper in it. I refuse to believe that Conviser put that in there just to be funny.

Utah '05: We had a commercial paper essay. It was freaking brutal. Still passed though (it is Utah after all)...

Conviser's always playing silly jokes. He got you 4:37, didn't he!

Quick trio of semi-interesting bar horror stories. July 05 CA exam - San Mateo Expo center. It resembles a huge cattle warehouse, filled with folding tables/chairs for as far as the eye could see. There were literally thousands of people taking the exam there and no proctor was under 70 years old.

1) Some asshat chick is doing lunges up down the aisle while mumbling something inaudible under her breath, presumably to burn off energy to calm herself, but agitating everyone else. I thought some guy was going to pop her in the mouth at one point. Luckily an 80-something year-old proctor gets on the mic and says that she needs to immediately stop doing those "knee bendy things" and return to her seat so we can all start the exam.

2) During the instruction reading portion that precedes the actual start of the test, a girl 6 rows up from me vomits in the aisle. She didn't even attempt to get up and go to the john. Luckily, she didn't actually hit anyone.

3) Lastly, a couple minutes later while folks are still attending to the vomit girl and cleaning up her mess, I hear a big thud from someone sitting 2 rows in back of me (he's on an aisle seat like me). I turn around and the guy is out cold on the floor. Apparently he passed out and cracked his head pretty badly on the floor.

Vomit girl and lunge girl take the test. Pass out guy is escorted outside so paramedics can attend to his head injury and assess mental condition, all of which is against his desire (he came to rather quickly and insisted he was fine and wanted to still take the test). Apparently, if someone actually loses consciousness, CA does not allow them to continue/take the test. Little CYA with the paramedics is the protocol instead. Bumpy start, but the test (at least in my section) was without further incident for the duration of the remaining 3 days

Compared to these 3 asshats, I felt pretty good about my chances. I passed.

I fell in love with #801 taking the February 2008 NJ bar. #801, are you out there? I'd like to go out for drinks with you.

#802.

Anyone seen the documentary about the California Bar Exam, A lawyer walks into a bar? Pretty interesting. I was mostly rooting for those who ultimately failed to pass, and vice versa.

Best was the whorey but cute Ho-Chunk Indian who basically partied all the time and danced dirty with dudes at clubs instead of studying. They also showed her going to the chiropractor in order to scam insurance company from some car accident that she was in. She also failed, which was pleasing to me. I would normally say that I wouldn't wish failing any bar on anyone, but you would wish it on her. Trust me.

The guy who failed it for the 42nd time was kind of sad, but what do you expect?

re 4:43 - lat can now add on his resume matchmaker

I have a buddy who took the TX bar a couple years ago with a staph infection in his nasal cavity. Dude's nose was almost as big as Obama's ears. Anyway, first day, he brought in a bunch of tissues for the drainage. Few hours into it, he had to sneeze like an elephant, and spewed bloody drainage goo all over his test, the dest, and the chick's material next him. He used the tissues to blot some of the nastiness and apologizes. He passed.

4:54, I spew goo all over chick's "material" all the time. Most of them even like it.

Illinois Bar Exam 2006 in Chicago at the American Dental Association (insert pulling teeth joke). During the morning of day two of the exam, we began to feel a rumbling of our desks and loud pounding sounds. This continued for about an hour. Our desks were literally rattling. Turns out the building two doors down was being demolished. The Bar officials went to talk to the construction supervisor about stopping the demolition (Picture member of the bar association try to convince a teamster to stop working...wait I can’t hear you from the sounds of the heavy machinery). After the lunch they explained that the demolition would be over for the day shortly and they would "take this into consideration" when grading our exams. Everyone I knew in the room passed. Except for the guy who dropped his cell phone during day one in the exam room and, when the exam proctor found it and ask at the end of the day who it belonged to, he went up to claim it. They barred him from the exam for bringing a cell phone into the exam room, in violation of the rules.

4:56 -- a Teamster doing construction or demolition? Considering Teamsters drive trucks, that would be hard to imagine.

3:55 -

thanks. can you let 3:53 know?

- 3:51

Isn't conviser breaking a contract with Epstein about now? I think he owes Epstein a corvette.

Anybody know the ho who wore clackity shoes at the recent Barbri simulated MBE at Javits?

Fucking ho

VA 2006 in the Salem Civic Center on essay day (yes, I wore a suit and tennis shoes and people who wear clicky heals should be thrown out of the exam). Huge storm roll through- rain leaking through the roof eerily close to my computer. Suddenly, power goes out. No AC, no power for laptops, very little light. Voice over the sound system says "Keep typing until your batteries run out. We have papper up here if you need it." Fortunately the power was only out for about 30 minutes, but it was nervewracking.

Few people know this but all bar exams are graded in a large room of cubicles by scantily clad, noble savages. When deciding if a person passes, an eagle flys over head and in a calm, james earl jones-esque voice says either "let the boy pass" or "the boy is not ready to learn the ways of the warrior"

SLOW NEWS DAY!

In other news, an Alabama TTT is considering merging with an Arkansas TTT...

Jesus Christ, how about some news about white guys with asian girls?

- King of WGWAG

156 on BarBri MBE, getting about 90% of the points of law on the state essays.

Should I quit studying now?

6:07, I think you should study for three and a half more days. Then you should be good.

The worst part of the NY laptop screw-up of 2007 was -- at the Long Island location at least -- that we sat down to take the test at 8:15 and they didn't start the test until 10:30. People were freaking out all over the place. Hwen I asked the woman next to me where she was from, she whispered, "No offense, I really don't want to talk to anyone before the test." She remained seated on her hands for the next 2 hours.

The best part of the test was that there were two evidence question that were "ripped from episodes of Law and Order" and an essay question which was an episode of "Judging Amy." Finally, it paid to goof off and watch TV instead of studying.

The worst part of the NY laptop screw-up of 2007 was -- at the Long Island location at least -- that we sat down to take the test at 8:15 and they didn't start the test until 10:30. People were freaking out all over the place. Hwen I asked the woman next to me where she was from, she whispered, "No offense, I really don't want to talk to anyone before the test." She remained seated on her hands for the next 2 hours.

The best part of the test was that there were two evidence question that were "ripped from episodes of Law and Order" and an essay question which was an episode of "Judging Amy." Finally, it paid to goof off and watch TV instead of studying.

The worst part of the NY laptop screw-up of 2007 was -- at the Long Island location at least -- that we sat down to take the test at 8:15 and they didn't start the test until 10:30. People were freaking out all over the place. Hwen I asked the woman next to me where she was from, she whispered, "No offense, I really don't want to talk to anyone before the test." She remained seated on her hands for the next 2 hours.

The best part of the test was that there were two evidence question that were "ripped from episodes of Law and Order" and an essay question which was an episode of "Judging Amy." Finally, it paid to goof off and watch TV instead of studying.

6:07 - Dan Hennessey? is that you?!

Colorado Bar, 2007. The guy sitting next me has a disturbed look on his face before the exam. So, I politely ask him if everything is ok? He responds, yes, but notes that this is the first time he has ever worn an adult diaper.

I give him props for thinking outside of the box (and being a fucking kook). Thankfully, our Depends-wearing friend passed.

The worst part of "The worst part of the NY laptop screw-up of 2007" guy is when he published the same lengthy story three times in a row.

Note to all '08 test takers: you WILL have time to get up and go to the bathroom. There is NO NEED to wear diapers. Plus, stewing in your own filth has got to be distracting. (Though I imagine there are people who are weird enough to go that extra mile to simulate test-day conditions in their practice tests)

Rumor has it Judge Halverson will be taking the California Bar this year as she is looking to relocate if stripped of her office Don't sit near the scooter accessible seating unless you want a good look.

will she be wearing a towel-sized diaper?

2:28

I am crying laughing at my computer.

Colorado, July '83.

The exam was given in the National Western Stock Show Hall of Education. Yes, the location is in the middle of the stockyards. No Air conditioning, trains rumbling through every 40 minutes or so. MBE on day one, essays on day 2. I typed the essays and had the foresight to bring a 100' extension cord.

I passed and swore I'd never take another bar exam.

Cali 2007.

Dude next to me takes his performance test, rips the pages out (which Bar/bri told us to do) and basically shuffles it constantly for the next 3 hours. Papers are flying everywhere, an important looking one (with the directions on it) flies into the aisle in front of us. He never picks it up.

Good idea? Good idea? Good idea?

He finds it at the end when the proctor --who has been watching the whole time -- instructs him to pick it up and put it in his baggy thing. He looks like I kicked him in the nuts for 3 hours. I felt really bad for him till I realized they curve the Cali bar exam...

Guy next to me in CA in 2005 has his laptop crash on the very first day about an hour in. He was remarkably calm and passed, despite the fact that he initially couldn't get any paper from the 70-year-old proctor, who wanted him to wait until the tech guy came over.

A friend of a friend did something similar to a post above--registered for the CA bar exam but not character and fitness or the actual bar or whatever. Studied all summer and wasn't let in the door.

6:42(2) -- While I hate to let facts screw up a good Halverson jab, she's already a member of the CA bar (though listed under her maiden name and, based on the admission date, she failed her first try):

http://members.calbar.ca.gov/search/member_detail.aspx?x=98146

5:00- yes, we know that most Teamsters are involved in trucking rather than construction work, but clearly the point of the story is that some nerdy bar official was talking to a big burly union worker or foreman.

However, just so you know, the Teamsters have a Building and Construction division, which expressly includes demolition workers. So the workers in question probably really were Teamsters, and you are definitely a pretentious jerk who does not check his/her facts before criticizing others.

Lat: As for the girl who lost her mind and began running up and down the halls of Javits Center: the version I heard had her screaming "the covenant runs with the land, runs with the land" as she...um...ran.

3:36 - I took NY and NJ in 2001. I grew up in NJ and, despite living in NY, am proud to admit it.

Nevertheless, NJ was much easier. They don't even test NJ law, just common law. I had had some prior experience with tests like that before. It was called law school.

Don't be an ignorant douche just because you want to hate on NY Biglaw.

Colorado Bar Exam, July 2004

In an old furniture warehouse north of Denver, kind of shitty neighborhood, auto parts stores, Wendy's, etc.

There were a couple hundred of taking it on laptops. The majority were in a different room. Big, enormous, cavernous rooms for laptop and regular test takers.

Dude sitting next to me and I strike up a conversation. He went to the rich kid high school I nearly got kicked out of, then Standford Law and already had a gig with a well known (in Denver) business law firms. Me? Uhhh, well, I'm still looking. Put it out of my mind as soon as the materials get passed around.

I made the mistake of buying a cheap little digital stop watch and the fucking thing started beeping (not terribly loud) in the exam. I managed to kill it, but during the break sitting behind me this fatso chick with long frizzy orange hair said "Excuse me!" to get my attention and then loudly chastised me and demanded I turn it off. I gave her as flat a look as possible and stared silently till she was about to open her fat mouth again before I said "Fine" and turned around. Bitch.

Anyway, second day was multi-state. Went smoothly enough, no drama. The exam ends and we all kind of shuffle out down a long corridor. The double doors open up and it's a classic Denver summer storm, dark dark skies, lightning, thunder and big rain drops starting to fall. The crowd starting to gather was gauging the run to the cars when some dude lets out, in his best surfer/stoner drawl, 'See 30% of you in February!'

That was all I needed to hear, I ran the hell to my car, went home, drank 2 40ozs of Mickey's and passed the fuck out. Woke up the next day hung over as shit, cautiously optimistic, broke, no job and no good prospects. Welcome to the law.

Colorado released the results in October. They post the names of people who passed. That was a terrifying fucking scroll down the screen but my bowels practically turned to water when I saw my name.

Do the Barbri and you'll be fine. Do the practice questions and don't let it freak you out too badly. I did my last multistate practice a few days before the bar and scored just under 50%. Freaked but then calmed down.

In the days before the bar there won't be enough time to review everything. Take a deep breath and go with your gut. My gut (and my black, corporate heart) told me to forget Family Law and study Commercial Paper. I was frantically reading Family Law shit in the parking lot but no problem: no Family Law but we did get Commercial Paper. Score!

Oh yeah, buy your lunch at Whole Roods the day before and in the evening between exam days. Save your life.

At Big Law now, so as bleak as it seems it will work out.

Um, am I the only one who has not seen the requirement to register for the moral character and fitness thing to sit for the bar in CA? It doesn't say anywhere that you have to register for it before you can take the bar. You just can't be given a bar number until you are cleared. Right?

lulz, @ 1:38. dont even bother showing up dude.

OH bar July 2005. The in-state law schools have "tailgates" before the exam where they set up a tables of coffee, cookies etc and put their school banner up behind the table. An Ohio State guy walks over to the Capital Law School table and says "hey whats this, February sign ups?" Half the guys standing there had a look on their face that said "if I kill this guy right now, would provocation be a defense?". But he was spared, and passed.

1:38 - you do not need to send in your char & fitness app in CA to sit for the bar, just have to register with the state bar and apply to take the exam.

When I took my 2nd state bar, I couldn't bring myself to study. It was the same year as the first one, so the MBE score carried over. Unfortunately, the state where I went to law school and worked mirrored Federal procedure pretty closely (first bar) and the second state did not.
It was a looong day in Jeff City MO, making things up about Missouri civil procedure. I passed by one point.

Here are my stories:

1. On the first day of the Illinois bar, a girl a few tables away from me projectile vomited while the proctors were giving the instructions. I don't know what happened to her, or her table mates, but no one sat at that table afterwards.

2. While the vomiting was going on, a guy at my table took advantage of the unholy diversion created by vomiting girl and started filling in multiple choice questions. A proctor actually caught him but didn't do anything. Maybe they were worried about causing another vomiting episode, I don't know, but it was pretty lame.

3. In my friend's exam room, the temperature got so hot that a woman had a literal and figurative melt-down. About an hour into the exam, she stood up in the middle of the room, dripping sweat, and threw a screaming tantrum about the tempurature. The proctors actually stopped the exam and made everyone go to different rooms.

The moral of all these stories is: crazy shit will happen, so be prepared. Dress is layers, bring your stomach medication of choice, and try not to be distracted by the tools.

That, and study your ass off. Half the battle (if not the entire battle) is walking in with the confidence that you are prepared. Even if you haven't been studying hard all summer, you can still pull it off if you buckle down for the next two weeks. Good luck!

My horrible bar experience was realizing that the most boring, most poorly edited and longest bar exam story was posted by a fellow Colorado lawyer.

Sweet fancy Moses, that was horrible 1:15 a.m.

I'm 10 years out from the bar 1:13(2) is still comment of the day for me.

Virginia Bar summer 2007 Roanoke, VA

Day 1:
- Observed a guy panic as he realized that everyone else is wearing a suit, he isn't wearing a suit, and he didn't pack a suit.
- Found my seat in the typing room. Looked around and wonder why everyone around me is pregnant. Figured out by my keen sense of deduction that even though we are seated alphabetically, all the pregnant women are exempt from the alphabet and are allowed to sit near the bathroom.
- Forced to listen to numerous conversations involving how pregnant women's unborn children should be given bar licenses because they had to study and sit for the bar too.
- Threw up.
- Struggled to concentrate on the essay portion as the poor women around me tried to stay comfortable by doing calisthenics.
Day 2:
- Proctor calls out a 30 minute warning on the afternoon session of the multi-state when in reality there should be over 2 hours left.
- Heart stopped and gasped in unison with the 800+ others in the room.
- 2 minutes later, proctor gets back on the microphone to declare "Sorry, I guess I'm eager to get out of here too."
- Laughed so that I wouldn't cry.

At least I passed.

149, we must be friends. I know that story well. Fucking classic.

Dude, I'm totally using the "February sign-up" line in ten days.

Brilliant.

I sat for the bar a few years ago, and a man in his mid-fifties sat down beside me. I was making small talk, presumed that he was already a lawyer changing jurisdictions, when he told me that he was just graduating law school. He commented that it was his second career, and that he used to be an auditology surgeon, used to perform surgeries on those tiny bones in the ears. I asked "what would ever make you quit being a surgeon to become a lawyer?" He lifted up his left hand and showed me he was missing 3 fingers. "Don't take up hobbies" was all he said, and then he chuckled.

He was rather good spirited about it. I felt like crap. I spent the whole bar exam imagining what would happen if I lost a body part.

NY bar, July 06, Javits Center

First day, sit down next to a guy who told me it was his second time taking the exam, and that he had been up all night bc his wife just delivered their first child. One of the essays is all about trusts. Second day, guy says to me "I'm so glad that there weren't any trusts questions!" I was like, um yeah me too. There was also a bird flying around the room at one point, I have no idea how it got in but it was super distracting.

Third day went on to CT. In the middle of the morning session, there was a huge crash just to the left of me. Turns out that a very large man and broken his chair and was lying on the ground. The proctors came over to help him but he kept trying to write his essays while kneeling on the floor. I was laughing so hard that I couldn't write for 10 minutes, which was actually a much-needed sanity break. But CT was a breeze compared to NY.

I passed both and you will too if you just take it seriously but don't freak out. Also bring your lunch!