Along with his colorful co-defendant, private investigator Anthony Pellicano, prominent entertainment attorney Terry Christensen is now a convicted felon. Earlier today, a federal jury convicted the pair on conspiracy charges relating to illegal wiretapping.

Not a great way to kick off a holiday weekend. And not good news for the 110-lawyer firm that Christensen founded — Christensen, Glaser, Fink, Jacobs, Weil & Shapiro.

(That firm name may ring a bell. Name partner Robert Shapiro famously served on O.J. Simpson’s victorious defense team.)

Private eye Anthony Pellicano, attorney Christensen convicted of wiretap plot [Los Angeles Times via WSJ Law Blog]
Terry N. Christensen bio [Christensen, Glaser, Fink, Jacobs, Weil & Shapiro, LLP]

When it comes to seating juries, desperate times call for desperate measures. Like arresting — and shackling — jury duty deadbeats, which is what’s done in D.C.

Out in Oregon, they conscript jurors from off the street:

A juror shortage forced a judge to look through a phone book before sending sheriff’s deputies out into the street to round up enough people for a trial.

Lane County Presiding Judge Mary Ann Bearden said an unusually large number of criminal trials combined with an equally unusual number of no-shows for jury duty forced her to invoke a little-used state law.

“I dealt with some angry people,” the judge said. “They didn’t think it was fair.”

Their anger is understandable. These folks were out for a nice morning stroll, on a sunny day in August. The next thing they knew, they were jurors on a sex abuse trial — for a man accused of screwing the pooch aggravated animal abuse. And the defendant wasn’t even a federal judge.

Democracy: what a bitch.

Oregon judge tries dialing, rounding up jurors [AP via Seattle Times]

[Ed note: Though Non-Sequiturs is our traditional sign-off, posted at or near the end of the day, we’re not quite done — more posts will follow. We just wanted to give a quick round-up for those leaving the office early.]

* If you happen to be stuck at work over the long weekend, Paul Caron has you covered. It’s much better than trying to figure out which non-contiguous state you like best. [Tax Prof Blog]

* Chief Justice Roberts will be judging a moot court competition. If that sounds odd, consider that the competition is in Florida, home to 27 sweet electoral votes. [BLT: The Blog of Legal Times]

* The Veoh ruling might not help YouTube as much as they hoped. Maybe they should try garlic to battle with Viacom and Sumner Redstone [Law.com]

* Wait, pole-dancing isn’t exercise but beach volleyball is an Olympic sport? I’m so confused. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Gustav. Seriously. Running away is always a good option when dealing with nature. [Washington Post]

If going in-house was why you went to law school in the first place, this week’s Job of the Week is something you should check out.

It’s for a corporate attorney looking to move to more of a consulting role. As always, the Job of the Week is brought to you by Lateral Link. For more information about Lateral Link’s team of personal search consultants, or to see about joining their team, click here.

Position: Attorney Consultant

Location: Orange County, CA

Description: A Fortune 500 insurance company is seeking an attorney with at least two years of experience to consult on a variety of corporate matters. The attorney will be expected to develop mutual fund board meeting materials, draft fund and investment adviser procedures, prepare/negotiate related agreements, and work on all fund and adviser-related matters. In addition, the attorney will provide legal advice and other legal support to internal clients and monitor legislation and new laws affecting mutual funds and investment advisers. The role will involve drafting prospectus disclosure, investment adviser disclosure, and documents and materials, along with implementing appropriate procedures to comply with new laws.

For more information about this position, or to apply, please see Position 9656 on Lateral Link. Current members can also contact their personal search consultant directly to discuss this position. Membership in Lateral Link is free, and you can apply at www.laterallink.com.

Facebook just got a lot less cool, and a lot more LinkedIn. Watch out, for your firm may be coming to F-book soon.

The ABA Journal reports that Curtis, Mallet-Prevost, Colt & Mosle has launched a Facebook page to aid in its recruiting efforts:

Looking for a way to better promote itself to the next generation of lawyers, Curtis, Mallet-Prevost, Colt & Mosle has launched a Facebook page as part of its broader law school recruiting efforts.

“We are pleased to be capitalizing on the popularity of the most widely used social networking site,” Nancy Delaney, a Curtis partner who is a member of the firm’s personnel committee, says in a release (PDF) about the page. “As a Firm, we recognized the power of this format of communication and the wide use being made of it by future lawyers.”

Their page has 55 fans at the moment. We would pooh-pooh that, but the Above the Law fan page currently has just 96 fans.

(The ATL group page on Facebook, however, has more robust ranks, with over 800 members.)

Facebook Page is New Twist in Biglaw Recruiting [Robert Ambrogi’s LawSites]
BigLaw Firm Recruits on Facebook [ABA Journal]
Curtis, Mallet, Prevost, Colt & Mosle Facebook Page [Facebook]
CURTIS DEPLOYS FACEBOOK PAGE TO HELP ATTRACT TOP LAW STUDENTS [Curtis, Mallet, Prevost, Colt & Mosle Press Release - PDF]

According to the New York Times, John McCain has tapped Alaska Governor Sarah Palin as his running mate.

Appeal to disaffected Clinton voters? Trying to lock up the Mike Gravel fan base?

Update: Although Governor Palin is not a lawyer, there have already been several legal issues mentioned with regard to her candidacy. Just last month, her own state legislature opened an investigation into allegations that she tried to get her ex-brother-in-law fired from his state trooper job

Law professor Ann Althouse has already gone on record with a furry opinion about Palin’s credentials.

Without a professional legal background to pontificate on (compare Joe Biden), we here at ATL will continue to scour our sources to bring you the latest on Palin’s positions about the things that matter to lawyers, big and small. Anyone know her views on SCOTUS nominations?

McCain Chooses Palin as Running Mate [New York Times]
Alaska’s Palin Faces Probe [Wall Street Journal]

For about a year now, ever since he took a mysterious leave of absence in August 2007, we’ve been following the troubles of Judge Samuel B. Kent (S.D. Tex.). A suspension from the Fifth Circuit, allegations of breastfeeding and BJ requests — it hasn’t been pretty.

Yesterday things got even worse for Judge Kent. From the Houston Chronicle:

U.S. District Judge Samuel Kent was indicted Thursday on charges of abusive sexual contact and attempted aggravated sexual abuse of a female employee, making him the first federal judge to be charged with federal sex crimes and the first in Texas indicted in recent history.

Congratulations, Your Honor? It’s a privilege to be FIRST.

The alleged victim — Judge Kent’s former case manager, Cathy McBroom — issued a statement after the indictment came down:

“After a very difficult 17 months, I feel like I have finally been validated. I have listened and read with horror as Judge Kent’s lawyer suggested that what happened to me was ‘enthusiastically consensual,’ ” wrote McBroom, who remains a federal court employee. “I am relieved to find that even federal judges are not above the law, and that sexual abuse in the workplace is never acceptable, no matter the status of the offender.”

Thanks for the shout-out, Cathy!

A little bit more, below the fold.

The tips keep rolling in about firms no offering summer associates. Today’s confirmed casualty report comes from Stroock & Stroock & Lavan.

Unlike Wiley Rein, Winston & Strawn, and other reports we’ve heard that suggest firms are coalescing around a 90% offer rate, Stroock made offers to only 80% of their ‘08 summer class.

Stroock did not directly confirm this number, but they did not deny it either.

Instead, Stroock communications director Jim Ponichtera focused on a different percentage:

In 2007, Stroock made a strategic decision to increase the size of its incoming class. Our summer classes were typically in the 28-30 range, and in 2008 we had 54 summer associates. Part of this was due to our decision to increase the class size, and part of this was due to an unexpectedly high acceptance rate of offers to join our summer program.

At the end of the summer, we extended a record number of entry-level offers - over 50% more than in 2007, which is consistent with our current business plan.

You hear that? 50% more offers.

More on the 20% who didn’t make the cut after the jump,

This marks the end of our review of the firms in the Vault 100. This is the final bunch up for discussion (with prestige scores in parentheses):

91. Lovells (4.494)
92. Thelen Reid Brown Raysman & Steiner LLP (4.489)
93. Hughes Hubbard & Reed LLP (4.478)
94. Kramer Levin Naftalis & Frankel LLP (4.459)
95. Kilpatrick Stockton LLP (4.452)
96. Locke Lord Bissell & Liddell LLP (4.439)
97. Squire, Sanders & Dempsey LLP (4.421)
98. Seyfarth Shaw (4.399)
99. Mintz, Levin, Cohn, Ferris, Glovsky and Popeo PC (4.394)
100. Fenwick & West LLP (4.373)

Discuss. Dissect. Compare. Contrast. Most of all, enjoy.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads - 2009

* The Democratic love fest peaked last night. Senator Barack Obama addressed more than 80,000 people in a Denver football stadium. Our favorite line was his take on “it’s not me, it’s you.” [New York Times]

* A reporter for ABC News wasn’t feeling the love at the Democratic convention this week. Denver police arrested him Wednesday for trespassing while he tried to get interviews on a public sidewalk. His attorneys and the ACLU want all charges dropped. [The Blotter/ABC News]

* Under new Justice Department rules, “federal prosecutors will no longer be able to strong-arm corporate targets to reveal protected conversations with their attorneys.” [CNN]

* Florida lawyers acting badly may make it hard for workers to file overtime violation suits. [National Law Journal]

* Embattled Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick is suing to stop the hearing that would remove him from office. [Washington Post]

* … We hope his lawyers are making him prepay for that. An attorney has filed suit against Mayor Kilpatrick for allegedly stiffing him on a $79,000 legal bill. [Detroit Free Press]

* Tom Cruise is being sued for $11 million by a bunch of German actors who say they were injured in the filming of his last movie. Show me the money! [Onlinewire]

* Rick Reilly continues his transition from inane blather on Sports Illustrated to inane blather on ESPN. [ESPN.com]

* Taxpayers in Texas had to pay money for a judge to deal with Hilary Duff’s birthday party. [Houston Chronicle]

* Target will pay $6 million in damages and make their website accessible to the blind, having already succeeded in making their website perfectly accessible to those who are poor and have low standards. [Law.com]

* The Justice Department is apparently going to try the Joanne Galloway “I strenuously object” argument with SCOTUS. [SCOTUSblog]

To paraphrase Austin Powers, Heller Ehrman is getting to “town bicycle” status. The latest firm to take a ride through Heller’s financials: Mayer, Brown, Rowe & Maw.

According to Am Law Daily, citing sources close to both Heller and Mayer Brown, Heller is “aggressively” pursuing other merger options, with Mayer Brown looking like the most promising match. They add:

The current talks between Mayer Brown and Heller, which began days after Heller’s talks with Baker & McKenzie ended, actually represent a second effort to combine the firms.

Before anybody starts requesting new business cards, it must be noted that Heller merger rumors tend to be as bankable as that Nigerian guy who needs your account number. In the past few months, Heller has been linked to Winston & Strawn, Proskauer Rose, and Baker & McKenzie. Given that a Heller/Mayer Brown merger has fallen through before, this latest rumor could be more about smoke screen than actual fire.

Just last week, Heller announced that it was postponing start dates until after Martin Luther King Day. We’ll keep you updated on Heller’s continuing efforts to be saved.

Heller Ehrman, Mayer Brown In Merger Talks [Am Law Daily]

[Ed. note: This post is by guest writer LIAM HILL (no relation to Kashmir), who will be writing a series of posts about fashion and style. Fashion is a popular topic these days. See, e.g., the undershirts post (200 comments).

Perhaps it's because Fashion Week is about to get under way in New York. You can follow goings-on over at our sister site, Fashionista, which will be covering the collections live from Bryant Park.]

With the economic downturn, lawyer layoffs, and pushed-back start dates, I've been wondering about the influence that such turmoil has had on -- what else? -- office fashion. I tend to agree with Mark Twain, who said, "Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society." (Well, unless you're in the middle of Times Square, with a guitar and a cowboy hat.)

Leaner times tend to bring out the Brooks Brothers aesthetic, and business casual once again goes where it belongs -- away. Ties and coats return, flip-flops and "commuter shoes" stay home, and "white shoe" again can once mean white shoe (but only on Fridays). Although many will resist the siren song of a more formal workplace, the trend is inevitable. I know you won't believe me, but apparently those who want to take your job already do. At least according to Turnbull & Asser.

Read my interview with James Cook (pictured), Bespoke Manager of Turnbull & Asser, and share your thoughts on the current state of men's fashion, after the jump.

Stealing Swiss Miss from your law firm’s kitchen is not a good idea. If you’re a summer associate, it’s a recipe for getting no-offered.

And stealing food from the law firm refrigerator is also unwise. See here (and note the “FYI” postscript).

Does anyone care to guess — or actually know — the law firm where this sign was posted?

Reasons Not To Steal Food From the Company Fridge [Midtown Lunch]

Am Law Daily highlights the work of James Clark, a fifth-year at Cleary Gottlieb Steen & Hamilton, who took a two-month unpaid leave to volunteer for the Obama campaign in Pennsylvania.

Clark was a community organizer for three different townships in Bucks County, a county Hillary Clinton carried with over 60 percent of the vote. He felt that his Cleary litigation experience helped him in his campaign stint organizing local volunteers:

Volunteers are kind of like junior associates in that you have to clearly articulate what needs to be done so that everyone is on the same page.

Also don’t make any sudden movements. Be firm, yet gentle.

Clark credits Cleary for allowing him the opportunity to work in rural Pennsylvania:

The firm has always made it clear to me that they are committed to the community and they’ve allowed me to sort of be a pro bono rainmaker and go out and find things that are worthwhile.

Can Clark make partner with his book of pro bono business now?

We jest, but only out of jealousy. Taking two months off to do something you feel is important is commendable, regardless of your politics. Keeping your Biglaw job while you do it (Clark is getting married soon) makes you the winner, even though you lost.

ELECTION 2008: Cleary Associate Gives Up Paycheck for Obama [Am Law Daily]

As we mentioned earlier today, we’re doing a series of posts on law firms no-offering their summer associates. Recently we heard this, from an operative in a law school career services office:

The first blow of what we expect to be a horrible recruiting season has landed. Winston & Strawn in Chicago was “oversubscribed” and is handing out no-offers and soft offers.

We contacted the firm for comment. From spokesperson Darryl Van Duch:

I am responding on behalf of firm management regarding your inquiry about Winston’s summer class. In your email you stated that Winston & Strawn in Chicago is oversubscribed, and is handing out no-offers and cold offers.

It is the firm’s policy to not comment on individual personnel issues or hiring issues. However, we felt in this situation it was appropriate to address your statements. As to the issue of cold offers, we have not made and will not make so-called ‘cold’ offers. Additionally, the overall percentage rate of offers we made to summer associates in the firm this year was in the 90s, consistent with prior years.

What we’ve been hearing is roughly consistent with Van Duch’s statement. Tipsters tell us that the firm’s Chicago office no-offered 7 out of 67 summer associates, meaning that 90 percent of summers did receive offers.

Now, 90 percent seems plenty high. But it’s certainly lower than the 95 to 100 percent offer rates that were par for the Biglaw course during recent boom times. According to the NALP directory, the Chicago office of Winston had an offer rate of 100 percent in 2007, with 37 out of 37 summers getting offers.

More ruminations on offer rates, after the jump.

The end of this tale is tragic and grim, but we’ll focus on the salacious over the sad. From the Telegraph:

James Muir-Little, 45, a deputy district judge, resigned his post before the outcome of disciplinary proceedings against him. He had cheated on his own wife with Joanne Hall, 31, a cardiac nurse, after meeting her through and internet website for swingers.

They exchanged naked pictures and sexual fantasies by email before twice meeting for sex at hotels. In one email Mrs Hall promised to be a “dirty little slut” for the judge.

Not to be confused with clean big sluts. Or Nazis German prison workers. They’re popular on the other side of the pond.

The tragic part is that when Joanne Hall’s husband, Gavin Hall, learned of her infidelity, he killed their three-year-old daughter in revenge.

But let’s not dwell on that. More details about the swinger judge, after the jump.

Thanks for all of the tips in response to our Friday post on no-offers. We are investigating various leads and will bring you a series of posts based on what we learn.

We’ll start with Wiley Rein. The firm’s 2008 summer class was oversubscribed, but only four summer associates paid the price. We’d been hearing reports that Wiley gave offers to 34 out of 38 SAs, and the firm has now confirmed the news.

Kay Nash, director of professional development and attorney recruiting at Wiley, said over email:

As is always the case here, everyone who deserved an offer received one, despite our higher numbers this summer. We are confident that we can comfortably accommodate the excellent students to whom we extended offers. We always aim for approximately 25 new associates, but gave a significantly higher number of offers reflecting the strength of our summer class.

A few tipsters pointed out that Wiley’s class may have been oversubscribed due to the huge fees the firm earned as part of the 2006 Blackberry litigation. The settlement pushed Wiley’s profits per partner all the way to number one for 2006.

Thirty-four offers out of an expected 25 slots suggests that Wiley is doing the best they can. But that probably does not mean a lot to the four fallen. We pour out our 40 to the undeserving four.

Earlier: Fall Recruiting Open Thread: No Offer, No Cry

If you have a small penis the only thing you can do about it is buy a gun.

I can finally say that with the authority of judicial precedent behind me. As the WSJ Law Blog reported yesterday, Steve Warshak, founder of Enzyte, was sentenced to 25 for defrauding sad, pathetic men.

I have often watched the late night replay of the Daily Show and Colbert and wished, nay prayed, that somebody would put an end to this stupid ad-campaign so I could get back to Girls Gone Wild promos. Though U.S. District Judge S. Arthur Spiegel ruled that the company would be allowed to stay in business, one expects civil litigation to destroy once and forever the concept of “natural male enhancement.”

There are lots of penis products on television, usually in the form of car commercials. But the lack of subtlety from these Enzyte jerks is just totally out of place for the quiet, drunken depression that marks watching late night television. Get out of my head Smilin’ Bob, I do not believe you!

Now if we could only get rid of commercials telling me that I have to keep it up for 36 hours, life would be better.

Fraudulent Male Enhancement Drug Gets Company Founder 25 Yrs. [WSJ Law Blog]

Over at f/k/a, David Giacalone wonders why few people have taken a stand on Harvey Silverglate’s outrageous contention that the “Harvard Factor” has somehow killed satire in the legal profession.

Stand at my wall and start screaming “Hektor,” why don’t you?

Professor Silverglate reminds me of the guy, Dr. Pritchard I believe, who wrote the poetry textbook in Dead Poets Society. He tries to make objective the subjective art of “comedy,” despite the fact that he is not funny.

Silverglate is annoyed that so many people reacted poorly to the New Yorker cover of Barack Obama dressed up in so-called “muslin” attire. His reasoning for the backlash over the cover is that “elites” — like Obama — have become so stifled in their thinking that they can no longer take a joke.

He specifically calls out the HLS Parody (full disclosure: I was part of the show each of my three years). He states that none of the humor approaches the frankness or “brutality” of previous incarnations.

Excuse me while I stand on my desk and shout “yawp.”

Maybe back in Silverglate’s day, all the good ‘ol boys could sit around and tell watermelon jokes with impunity. Today, at Harvard and I’d imagine most anywhere else, you can still make fun of racial and gender stereotypes, you just have to be a little bit more intelligent and creative about it. Why? Because “Gee golly, them girls sure can’t drive,” just isn’t funny anymore. It’s called progress.

More ad hominem attacks on Silverglate, after the jump.

Our Vault 100 series is winding down. We hope that the insiders have enjoyed the opportunity to brag (or to vent) about their firms. And that the curious have appreciated insights into life at various firms in the top 100.

Here is the next bunch up for discussion (with their prestige scores in parentheses):

81. Crowell & Moring LLP (4.763)
82. Katten Muchin Rosenman LLP (4.754)
83. Stroock & Stroock & Lavan LLP (4.735)
84. Arent Fox PLLC (4.726)
85. McGuireWoods LLP (4.697)
86. Venable LLP (4.676)
87. Dorsey & Whitney LLP (4.575)
88. Dickstein Shapiro LLP (4.554)
89. Baker & Hostetler (4.531)
90. Finnegan, Henderson, Farabow, Garrett & Dunner, L.L.P (4.503)

Are the following statements true or false?

Okay, you know the drill.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads - 2009

* Barack Obama and Joe Biden accept the love of the Democratic Party. [Washington Post]

* Sobering news for the lovefest: “A potential conflict of interest involving Biden and one of the nation’s biggest asbestos litigation law firms.” [Politico]

* Bad Citibank! It owes 53,000 credit card customers $14 million for stealing their positive balances. According to one executive, “Stealing from our customers is a business decision, not a legal decision.” [Courthouse News Service]

* Child killer smiles as he hears death sentence. [CNN]

* Mexican Supreme Court upholds Mexico City’s abortion law. [Guardian]

* A Nepalese family is suing Iraq contractor KBR for human trafficking. [BBC News]

* Beach nudists sue for the right to be naked. [New York Times]

*… Fortunately for them, Orange County Superior Court Judge Shelia Fell likes nudity. [San Diego Union-Tribune]

* Expect McCain’s Veep pick today. [Politico]

The start of the new Supreme Court Term is still over a month away. The nine robed ones are all over the world — teaching in Europe, chilling in New Hampshire, and otherwise getting away from One First Street.

So things have been relatively quiet on the Supreme Court clerk hiring front. There are no new names over at the Clerkship Notification Blog or at Wikipedia (which also seems to be missing a few names that we reported last month).

But there has been some movement. We hear that Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg recently hired David Newman (Yale 2006 / Katzmann / Rakoff (S.D.N.Y.)) as her second law clerk for October Term 2010. (RBG has already completed her OT 2009 hiring.)

Have other justices interrupted their summer vacations to do some clerk hiring? If you’re aware of some news not previously reported in these pages, please share what you know, by email (subject line: “Supreme Court clerk hiring”).

If you’re interested, check out the updated list of Supreme Court clerks for OT 2009 and OT 2010 (with David Newman added), after the jump.

The Vault 100 march continues! In this series of open threads, we list the firms, and you all discuss their upsides and downsides. We’ll be wrapping this puppy up this week.

Here are the next ten (with prestige scores in parentheses):

71. Nixon Peabody LLP (5.218)
72. Hunton & Williams LLP (5.208)
73. Perkins Coie LLP (5.119)
74. Reed Smith LLP (5.057)
75. Patton Boggs LLP (5.050)
76. Chadbourne & Parke LLP (4.997)
77. Bryan Cave LLP (4.969)
78. Thacher Proffitt & Wood LLP (4.967)
79. Howrey LLP (4.926)
80. Schulte Roth & Zabel LLP (4.910)

Usually, we have fun with the “notable perks” chosen by Vault. But as we move down the list, the perks are becoming distinctly less notable — e.g., gym membership discounts, free parking, and “good views.” Oh well.

You know what to do! Have at it in the comments.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads - 2009

* DJ Vlad is suing Rick Ross for an alleged beatdown administered by Ross and four other … creative consultants. You can almost hear DJ “punk-a$$” Vlad’s record label screaming “Noooooooooo.” [MTV News]

* The WSJ’s Ashby Jones wonders if summer programs — and the hiring timetable they’re tied to — are to blame for Biglaw’s financial predicament. [Wall Street Journal (subscription); WSJ Law Blog]

* Sadly, this should come as no surprise: Kafka sheds light on the legal profession. Move over, Above the Law; now there’s Before the Law. [Lexis Hub / BBPL]

* Really, really old laws will soon make it on to the internet. Moses would be so proud. [The Guardian via HuffPost]

* Former New York Giants defensive end Michael Strahan saw his child support payments reduced. The appellate court invoked the “three pony rule,” as in: “no child, no matter how wealthy the parents, needs to be provided [with] more than three ponies.” Maybe now Strahan can afford to fix his teeth. [Law.com]

* Did Hillary Clinton misquote Harriet Tubman? [The Caucus / New York Times]

As we expected, celebrity professors Cass Sunstein and Samatha Power were the winners of last week’s July Couple of the Month voting, running away with over 60 percent of the vote. Congratulations to this nerdy-hot duo!

This week’s set of contestants might be the strongest we’ve seen this season. Their write-ups feature five Harvard degrees, a Rhodes, and one of Biglaw’s most exalted surnames. Here are the names of the newlyweds:

1. Geneviève Treuille and Daniel Wachtell

2. Melissa Langsam and Todd Braunstein

3. Amanda Schwoerke and Stephen Sachs

Read more about these couples — and see their pictures — after the jump.

Remember when “outsourcing” was something that only blue collar workers with “some” high school education had to worry about? Well, those days are long gone, and now the global economy is officially poised to raid Biglaw jobs.

In an opinion (PDF) made public on Tuesday, the ABA declared shipping legal work overseas to be ethically permissible. The New York Law Journal reports that the first causalities will likely be contract attorneys brought in for extra muscle during document intensive litigation.

But we know it won’t stop there. Check in with any other industry that has to face off against a subcontinent of educated, English-speaking professionals willing to do the work for fractions of what Americans demand. It’s not pretty.

To be sure, we can count on the ABA to erect other (largely protectionist) policies, to ensure that high-end legal work remains the sole purview of partners graduates from accredited law schools.

Yet so long as Biglaw remains big business, how long before the work of junior associates can be cost effectively shipped overseas? It’s not like firms want to go to $190K for incoming associates.

People already in the pipeline should be fine. But change is coming to our profession. This ABA decision isn’t the tip of an iceberg, it is the receding sea that anticipates a tsunami.

Make haste for high ground.

ABA Gives Thumbs Up to Legal Outsourcing [Law.com]

Earlier: Biglaw to… Rupees?

Things are looking good these days for Weil, Gotshal & Manges. For the sixth year in a row, it made the top 10 of the Vault 100. It took fourth place in the American Lawyer’s A-List rankings, and turned in a strong showing in the magazine’s midlevel associate survey (#11 out of 80+ New York firms).

And Weil attorneys are an interesting crew, too. Some plunge into rapping careers. And some compete on reality shows!

Meet first-year associate Charlie Herschel. He’s a contestant on the latest season of Survivor, premiering on September 25. From his bio:

Charlie Herschel has been a fan of SURVIVOR since the first season and has been training for it ever since. A lawyer for one of the top 10 most prestigious law firms in the world, Herschel is ready to try his persuasion skills on a different type of jury.

This 29-year-old, marathon-running attorney and University of Pennsylvania graduate says he is above nothing when he gets to the island. Charlie’s strategy is to be authentic but with a twist. “With high risks, come high rewards, but the risks must be calculated.” The middle son of three boys and a native New Yorker, the Ivy Leaguer is not afraid to claw his way to the top.

If Herschel can survive in the Biglaw jungle, Gabon should be a piece of cake. And there’s precedent for lawyers faring well on Survivor. E.g., Yul Kwon (winner of Survivor: Cook Islands, and a year behind us at YLS).

Now, large law firms can be a bit stodgy. Some don’t react well to their associates’ forays into reality television. See, e.g., David Otunga (from I Love New York 2, and no longer at Sidley); Jeremy Anderson (from The Bachelorette, and no longer at Hunton & Williams). But see Denise Gitsham (welcomed back by K&L Gates, after appearing on The Bachelor); Stacy Rotner (still at Sidley, after appearing on The Apprentice; guess it’s more respectable than I Love New York 2).

What was Weil’s response to Charlie Herschel going on Survivor? Find out — and ogle photos of a shirtless Herschel — after the jump.

We have some bad news for this year’s summer associates. Based on Monday’s survey, brought to you by ATL and Lateral Link, about one in four attorneys at your firm didn’t like you.

The number of practicing attorneys who said “Summer associates, hate ‘em” narrowly beat the number of practicing attorneys who said “Summer associates, love ‘em,” by a margin of 25.06% to 24.82%. And while that edge may not be statistically significant, it still has to sting a little.

Among lawyers who had been practicing for more than two years, the gap widened considerably, to 30% vs. 22%.

And in Atlanta, Charlotte, Dallas, and Miami, associates of all ages hated summer associates most of all, to the tune of at least 40%.

Mind you, half of practicing respondents were simply neutral on the question — but that’s still pretty cold comfort, in this season of cold offers.

Read more, below the fold.

Judging from our traffic, readers are enjoying this rundown of the Vault 100. We do aim to please here at ATL. We appreciate those who have offered insights about firms in the comments.

Moving on to the next group (with prestige scores in parentheses):

61. Cahill Gordon & Reindel LLP (5.608)
62. Sonnenschein Nath & Rosenthal LLP (5.583)
63. Bingham McCutchen LLP (5.583)
64. Greenberg Traurig, LLP (5.478)
65. Holland & Knight LLP (5.416)
66. Heller Ehrman LLP (5.346)
67. Foley & Lardner LLP (5.266)
68. Steptoe & Johnson LLP (5.252)
69. K&L Gates LLP (5.242)
70. Kaye Scholer LLP (5.230)

As we move down the Vault list, “notable perks” are becoming less elaborate. This group is dominated by tales of free food, from endless soda at Greenberg Traurig to weekend doughnuts and muffins at Foley. And it appears that Pillsbury lacks a monopoly on cookie benefits; over at Cahill, lawyers are plied with “twice daily cookie trays.”

We note this food-related perk at Bingham: “If any lawyer takes out a more junior lawyer for drinks/dinner, he/she can submit the expense to the mentoring budget AND the senior person can get creditable hours.” Can you expense the roofies?

We invite you to compare and contrast these firms’ work, lifestyle, benefits… and cookies, in the comments.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads - 2009

Yesterday, we criticized law schools for slavishly following the dictates of U.S. News and World Report. But a law firm responding to associate concerns is a different matter entirely.

A tipster informs us that Wiley Rein associates were told that up to 50 pro-bono hours would be credited towards meeting billable targets.

Firm Chairman Richard Wiley delivered the message personally to associates at an afternoon lunch yesterday. The new policy could be a response to the firm’s low pro-bono commitment rating in this month’s AmLaw midlevel survey (subscription).

Is 50 hours a “commitment,” or merely lip-service? How does the new Wiley Rein policy stack up with your firm’s?

American Lawyer Midlevel Associates Survey [American Lawyer (subscription)]

Earlier: The American Lawyer Midlevel Associates Survey: Open Thread

Aside from occasional flurries of Golden Tee dominance, I rarely watch golf unless Tiger Woods is prominently involved. This makes me just like everybody else, a fact that the L.P.G.A has apparently noticed.

After unsuccessful attempts to woo Tiger into a sex-change operation, the L.P.G.A has a new marketing strategy: English-speaking golfers!

Starting in 2009, the ladies’ professional tour will suspend golfers who are not conversant in English.

Lest you think the ability to speak English has little to do with the entertainment value of hitting a ball and then walking after it, think again. Lisa Galloway, deputy commissioner of the tour, thinks that speaking English will help the sport attract sponsors and fans:

For an athlete to be successful today in the sports entertainment world we live in, they need to be great performers on and off the course, and being able to communicate effectively with sponsors and fans is a big part of this.

The lawyers weigh in after the jump.

* Those Bratz got a spanking, but not as severe a spanking as Mattel hoped. The jury awarded Mattel $100 million, rather than the $1 billion Quinn Emanuel’s John Quinn had requested. [CNN]

* U.S. District Judge John D. Bates rules Harriet Miers must testify before Congress. The big moment could come as early as next month. [Washington Post]

* Eight of the sixty judges sacked by former Pakistani president Pervez Musharaff have been reinstated. The others are still twiddling their thumbs. [BBC News]

* Barry Bonds wants to knock his case out of the park. His lawyers have moved to dismiss most of the government’s case against him for lying to a grand jury about steroid use. [Associated Press]

* In Mexico City, abortion is legal in theory, but not often in practice. Now the Mexican Supreme Court is considering overturning the one-year-old abortion law. [International Herald Tribune]

* Colorado U.S. attorney files charges in the Obama murder plot. The last name of one of the accused is Adolf. [Smoking Gun]

* How is Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick still in office? [Washington Post]

* Update in the case of the alleged half-ton murderess. Her attorney says she’s too fat to have killed her nephew. [CNN]

With the U.S. economy in the toilet, third tier or otherwise, law firms are building up their bankruptcy practices. They’re eagerly scooping up lateral associates in the field — and partners, too. From the American Lawyer:

A rough 18 months for Mayer Brown got a little worse on Monday, when San Francisco’s Orrick, Herrington & Sutcliffe announced that Raniero “Ron” D’Aversa Jr., the co-chair of Mayer’s restructuring and bankruptcy practice, would join Orrick immediately.

Considered a rising star of the bankruptcy bar, the 44-year-old D’Aversa — whose book of business is said to exceed $5 million by sources familiar with his work and reputation — will be based out of the New York office of Orrick. The firm placed 27th in this year’s Am Law 100 rankings with gross revenues of $772,000 and profits per equity partner of $1.7 million.

Will D’Aversa be taking clients with him? There’s disagreement on that score. Roger Frankel, the (kinda scary-looking) chair of Orrick’s bankruptcy practice, said that “it’s clear that there will be significant clients moving with him.” But Mayer issued a statement claiming that “no disruption of any client relationships is expected.”

Mayer Brown Loses Restructuring Chief to Orrick [American Lawyer]
Ron D’Aversa bio [Orrick, Herrington & Sutcliffe]
Raniero D’Aversa, Jr. bio [Mayer Brown via Google Cache]

Earlier: Job of the Week: Bankruptcy Can Be Good

* Every time a law blogger gets sued subpoenaed, our sphincters tighten up just a little bit more. [Legal Blog Watch]

* Students at Delaware’s Widener Law School hoping to take Con Law with Biden may be sorely disappointed. [WSJ Law Blog]

* And here I thought it was impossible to express dislike for Clarence Thomas and Derek Jeter with the same train of thought. [Cleveland Plain Dealer via How Appealing]

* ATL’s comma police keep it together far better than the average bear. [Gawker]

The constitutionality of the Public Company Accounting Oversight Board, enacted as part of the Sarbanes-Oxley Act, was recently upheld — decision available here (PDF) — by a divided panel of the D.C. Circuit. But those who challenged the Board’s legitimacy are fighting on.

The appellants will either seek rehearing en banc in the D.C. Circuit or certiorari from the Supreme Court. In their efforts, expect them to draw support from the forceful dissent by judicial superstar Brett Kavanaugh (who is, by the way, familiar with this fine website).

If appellants seek succor from the SCOTUS, their pleas may fall upon sympathetic ears. From our colleague, former Skadden and Latham corporate lawyer John Carney, over at Dealbreaker:

Perhaps the most ominous sign for the PCAOB is the fact that Judge Kavanaugh clerked for Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy, who would probably hold the swing vote if the case went to the Supreme Court. His dissenting opinion seems tailor-made to provoke the conservative wing of the court into striking down the board. Unless Congress acts to amend it, we’d bet the autonomous PCAOB is headed for extinction.

You can read the rest of his analysis — which will take you “back to Con Law and the halcyon days of youth,” in the words of one Dealbreaker commenter — over here.

Short Sarbanes-Oxley’s Accounting Board [Dealbreaker]
Free Enterprise Fund v. PBAOB (PDF) [U.S. Court of Appeals for the D.C. Circuit]
Sell Sarbanes-Oxley [New York Sun]
D.C. Circuit Affirms Constitutionality of Accounting Oversight Board [WSJ Law Blog]
Will a Lawsuit Unravel SOX? Firm Brings Constitutional Challenge [WSJ Law Blog]

Here’s a fact pattern: teen steals liquor, teen gets hammered, adult is called to help, adult drives teen home, teen dies, adult gets charged with… negligent homicide?

That’s the reality facing Candice Collard. The 24-year-old woman is being charged with homicide in Utah for failing to help Jess “Micade” Horrocks, 14, who died of alcohol poisoning this past April.

The charge seems especially harsh given that Utah has a criminal statute for failure to render aid. Uintah County Deputy Attorney Greg Lamb said that the homicide charge was warranted because Collard “failed miserably in several areas that could have prevented [Horrocks’s] death.” Lamb admits that his office is taking a “novel” approach to this case, which should make Collard feel swell.

Collard drove the teen 13 miles to Collard’s home instead of 2 miles to the hospital. Horrocks did not receive medical attention until the next day

In retrospect, obviously, Collard’s choice was unwise. But Collard neither procured the alcohol nor sat there and poured it down Horrocks’s throat.

This charge puts the perverse in legal incentives. When ineffective help puts you in danger of a homicide conviction, wouldn’t you rather roll the dice with a failure-to-render-aid charge?

The “go screw yourself, kid” attitude is something we’d expect out of the Bronx, but Utah?

Woman charged in boy’s alcohol-poisoning death [Salt Lake Tribune via Fark]

We bring you more word of postponed start dates for incoming associates. The latest comes from the Philly firm of WolfBlock, as first reported in the Philadelphia Business Journal:

In response to the economic slowdown, Wolf Block has delayed the start date of its entry-level lawyers for two months. The firm said all but one of eight recent law school graduates were told not to report for work until November 10 rather than the normal start date shortly after Labor Day.

Hiring partner Andrew Chirls said the first-year associates, who get paid $135,000 a year, will receive a $5,000 stipend to tide them over.

That works out to $2,500 a month, or $30,000 on an annual basis. But hey, at least they don’t have to work for it.

If you’re interested, there’s more — including info about summer-associate offer rates — after the jump.

Authorities are investigating whether men threatened to kill Senator Barack Obama, or if they were just trying to get a date with Jodie Foster. Either way, U.S. Attorney Troy Eid is certain that the potentially meth-addled gunmen posed no credible threat to Obama or the Democratic National Convention.

We have explored the colossal idiocy of making threats against the President before. However, in a news flash to, you know, Germans, Obama is not the president yet. He is not even the nominee of a major party.

What he is, is a “major candidate” and 18 U.S.C. § 3056, authorizes the Secretary of the Treasury to grant him Secret Service protection and all the other trappings of “dude, not to be messed with.”

Obama has received protection for well over a year, earlier than any other presidential candidate in history.

So, here’s an important safety tip: don’t threaten to harm Obama or McCain or Bob Barr or whomever. Register your displeasure in the traditional way, anonymous comments on various blogs that showcase your cutting wit and deep respect for democracy. The Secret Service doesn’t have a sense of humor.

U.S. attorney ‘confident’ Obama not threatened [Rocky Mountain News]

The makers of KNOW: The Magazine for Paralegals have another legal publication in the works. A tipster forwarded us an e-mail about a “new magazine for women professionals in litigation.”

Imagining the love child of Glamour and the American Lawyer, we expected to see planned articles on hot courtroom studs and legal fashion faux pas. But it sounds like this publication will be more strait-laced. The email announcement claims the magazine will “be chock full of work style and life style balance articles; address women’s issues in the law firm and in-house legal environment and offer informative pieces on current topics in technology, litigation and e-discovery.”

They’re in the naming phase, and are considering the following. Which two are not like the others?

* Women in Litigation
* Chill
* Woman Litigator
* Trial Mama
* American Litigator
* Spirit, The Magazine for Women in e-Discovery
* Equality, The Magazine for Women Litigators
* Legal Women, A Workstyle & Life Balance Magazine

We’re not excited by the bland “Women in Litigation” options, or anything with “e-Discovery” in the title. But “Chill” and “Trial Mama” are truly ridonculous. ATL Idol Exley’s “Clitigator”, or Lat’s beloved “Litigatrix”, would blow all the other entries away. We welcome better title suggestions in the comments.

Among the options offered, we can’t decide which is the worst. What do you think?

Law school deans continue to show the intellectual backbone of phytoplankton when faced with the big fish over at U.S. News & World Report. As the Wall Street Journal reported this morning (subscription), U.S. News is considering changing their law school rankings formula, and the wailing has already begun.

According to the report, U.S. News is considering counting the LSAT scores and GPAs of part-time students. Some law schools admit under performing students into their part-time programs; that way they can keep the tuition dollars flowing in, without jeopardizing their precious place in the rankings.

Brian Leiter sounded the alarm over this proposed change nearly two months ago (and we also covered it back then). Leiter notes that the proposed change could harm the mission of legal education:

For many, probably most, part-time programs serve older, working students, who might not have time for fancy LSAT prep courses, but who bring levels of dedication, seriousness, and pertinent experience that enrich legal education and the legal profession.

There are any number of reasons for law schools to admit, on a part-time basis, students who are unable to meet grade and test score cut-offs. And there are any number of reasons for U.S. News not to care in the slightest.

There is an interesting debate to be had on whether part-time programs enhance the quality of legal education or the legal profession. Instead, we’re getting marginal law schools trying to game a method of data collection, while a magazine tries to punish the offenders.

It’s just another indication that law school can be reduced to a couple of episodes of Law & Order.

Law School Rankings Reviewed to Deter ‘Gaming’ [WSJ (subscription) via WSJ Law Blog]
Proposed Changes to US News Ranking Methodology [Leiter’s Law School Reports]

This post is directed primarily at our male readers. But female readers with opinions about men’s fashion are also welcome to chime in.

To read the question presented, see this post by Bess Levin, over at our sister site, Dealbreaker. For one style columnist’s take on the issue, see here (but it’s a bit of a punt).

Then take our poll below, and share your opinion in the comments. The Dealbreaker post has almost 120 comments thus far. C’mon, ATL readers — we can top that!

This Is Serious [Dealbreaker]
V-neck or crew? The choice isn’t so simple [Memphis Commercial Appeal]

We’re entering the second half of the Vault 100. This is part of a series of open threads to discuss the firms considered to be the profession’s most prestigious. Because we know you love prestige. And the opportunity for “TTT” accusations. [FN1]

Here’s the next bunch of firms, with prestige scores in parentheses:

51. Munger, Tolles & Olson LLP (5.851)
52. Dechert LLP (5.838)
53. Vinson & Elkins LLP (5.822)
54. Goodwin Procter LLP (5.815)
55. Jenner & Block LLP (5.778)
56. Pillsbury Winthrop Shaw Pittman LLP (5.728)
57. Alston & Bird LLP (5.715)
58. Fish & Richardson P.C. (5.706)
59. Cooley Godward LLP (5.692)
60. Irell & Manella LLP (5.635)

Vault notes that attorneys at Pillsbury are treated to “freshly baked cookies.” But they also have to put up with being referred to as “Pillsburians” by Vault.

Compare, contrast, discuss… and if you’re at Pillsbury, have a chocolate chip cookie for us.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads - 2009

[FN1] We periodically get e-mails asking for the definition of “TTT,” which appears so often in comment threads. As the uninitiated have surely gathered, it’s a derogatory term. Likely originating on AutoAdmit, it stands for “third tier toilet.” For more, see Urban Dictionary.

* Some of you might have already noticed, but a former Sidley Austin associate had a big night. [ABA Journal; MSNBC]

* More reasons to dump Internet Explorer if you haven’t done so already. [Res Ipsa Blog]

* Maybe instead of professional responsibility, they should teach “internet scams for dummies” in law school. [ABA Journal]

* I’m pretty sure we were promised tactile feedback toys back in Real Sex 1. I’m sure we’ll get them just after the flying cars start rolling off the assembly line. [Legal Pad]

* Fun with Biden over at Legal Times. At this point, if his convention speech comes in under the 8-hour mark, he will claim victory. [BLT: The Blog of Legal Times]

As we reported last month, Thelen Reid Brown Raysman & Steiner is on the prowl for a merger partner. And just like a divorcée plunging back into the dating market, the firm is taking steps to make itself more attractive.

Like changing its name. From the firm’s press release:

In a move to present a clear and strong brand in the legal marketplace, Thelen Reid Brown Raysman & Steiner LLP, an international Am Law 100 law firm, announced today that it is shortening the legal name of the firm to Thelen LLP.

The name change will be effective September 9 and will better reflect the firm’s 80-year history as one of the world’s premier law firms. A single corporate identity also has the added benefit of consistent branding in the domestic and global markets in which Thelen operates.

There are other advantages, too. As reported in today’s National Law Journal, name partner Jeffrey Steiner just defected to DLA Piper. This follows the departures of name partners Peter Brown (to Baker Hostetler) and Richard Raysman (to Otterbourg Steindler). Scrubbing their names from the firm name makes sense (and may have been required).

It’s much safer for the firm simply to be known as “Thelen.” Max Thelen isn’t going anywhere.

Thelen Announces New Firm Name [press release]
Defections continue at Thelen [National Law Journal]
Thelen Faces Departures During Merger Search [Legal Times]
Thelen, It Rhymes With Wheelin’ [WSJ Law Blog]

* It appears University of Iowa political science professor Arthur H. Miller has met an untimely end. [Ace of Spades HQ; TaxProf Blog]

* Joe Biden’s reputation for never shutting up is already the stuff of legend. [The BLT: The Blog of Legal Times]

* More expectation management with Biden. [Supreme Dicta]

* Oh, now I see, those summer outings were really tests. [Portfolio]

* No theme from Blawg Review this week, but at least now we know why Jimmy Page and his titanium replacement hips were invited to the closing ceremonies. [Texas Appellate Law Blog via Blawg Review]

Corporette has entered the fall interviewing fray with their own top ten list of interviewing tips.

They really seem to think that successful interviewing requires effort, preparation, and study. They suggest keeping detailed notes on every conversation you have, networking, and even setting up Google and Westlaw alerts so you are up to speed on the latest legal news.

I know that the economy is in bad shape, but I’m not sure that turning into a crazy stalker person is the right way to go.

Then again, following Corporette’s guide is probably better than showing up hung-over and asking for a Bloody Mary.

The problem with any interviewing “advice” is that it needs to be tailored to the person. If you are socially awkward and talk like Michael Phelps, you probably want to rehearse everything you are going to say beforehand and speak only when forced. If you have Jerry McGuire-esque living room skills, you want to keep your head in the moment and trust your instincts.

Memorizing 15 fun-facts about every partner at the firm is an option, but there is no one path to success.

10 Things About … Interviewing [Corporette]

“My Gump, my Gump, my lovely Akin Gump. Check it out….”

What’s going on at Akin Gump? That seems to be what many of you are wondering, based on some comments posted to a recent open thread featuring the firm:

“What is happening to Akin Gump DC? I saw that a bunch of lit partners just left.”

“I’ve heard the same thing…. Akin appears to be losing tons of partners and the DC office is rumored to be in turmoil. It does, however, have Tom Goldstein, which is sure to attract gunners who think they’ll be arguing cases in three years.”

“I read somewhere that the changes at Akin are part of some larger strategic plan. Anyone know anything about that?”

As a matter of fact, yes — Kim Eisler does. He writes, over at Washingtonian:

Over the past few months, 950-lawyer Akin Gump Strauss Hauer & Feld has lost about 45 lawyers, including two of its rainmakers, Michael Madigan and Richard Wyatt Jr. Tensions are said to be high, with partners in the New York office unhappy that the Washington lawyers are not producing their share of revenue. To increase productivity, Akin Gump pushed out 5 percent of its lawyers who, in management’s view, were not generating enough income. The firm also closed its office in Taipei, one of 12 it maintained outside of Washington, and insiders predict the money-losing Beijing office will be next to go. The China offices have been expensive failures in the eyes of New York partners, who are pressing Washington to stop the bleeding….

The firm still has several stars, including criminal-defense lawyers John Dowd and Michele Roberts, Supreme Court litigator Tom Goldstein, and lobbying-practice head Joel Jankowsky, and is counting on them to pull Akin Gump out of its tailspin.

These boldface names are familiar to the ATL readership. John Dowd is the defense lawyer of Monica Goodling (and the former boss of the Akin Gump Escort). Tom Goldstein, the celebrated SCOTUS litigator, was a judge on ATL Idol.

To read more about comings and goings at Akin Gump, check out Eisler’s complete piece, available over here.

Clock Is Ticking for Strauss’s Firm [Capital Comment / Washingtonian]

Earlier: Fall Recruiting Open Thread: Vault 31-40 (2009)

This weekend, the New York Times explored the cascade of sadness left behind after massive layoffs. Aside from fear, the Times noted that there can be a productivity downgrade that shows up in real economic terms.

Too often, their anxious and overworked remaining employees become risk-averse and unproductive, or leave for other jobs. As companies hire new workers or turn to outside vendors to compensate, the short-term savings from layoffs can evaporate.

The National Law Journal also has some stern advice for layoff-happy firms. According to Bruce McEwen of Adam Smith Esq., “law firms that slash associate numbers in hopes of keeping profits-per-partner high may be headed for trouble.”

What else law firms can try, beyond going to $190K, after the jump.

Although Barack Obama is just days away from accepting the Democratic Party’s presidential nomination (acceptance song speculation here), some Hillary Clinton supporters refuse to give up. From the Philadelphia Daily News:

Barack Obama’s presidential campaign has faced so many false rumors about his family history that it has put his birth certificate on the Internet: he was born in Honolulu, nearly two years after Hawaii became a state, making Obama a U.S. citizen by birth.

But that hasn’t stopped Montgomery County lawyer Philip J. Berg from challenging Obama’s qualifications to be president.

Berg, a Hillary Clinton supporter, announced he’s filing a federal lawsuit today, claiming that Obama lost his citizenship when his mother relocated the family to Indonesia when Barack was a boy.

Under the law, however, moving to a foreign country does not negate an American’s citizenship.

Bad enough for Rule 11? In Berg’s defense — or maybe not — he makes other claims, too (e.g., that Obama was actually born in Kenya). You can check out the full complaint by clicking here.

Raining on Barack’s Parade [Philadelphia Daily News (fourth item)]
Berg v. Obama: Complaint (PDF)

Over the last several weeks, we’ve run quite a few ATL / Lateral Link surveys about summer associate issues like assignments, offers, and, of course, lunch.

But no matter what the survey topic, two debates have consistently emerged in the comments:

1) Are summer associates an appropriate use of firm resources and associate time?

2) Are the LOLcat pictures accompanying the surveys absolutely awesome, or really annoying?

Of course, it’s not that surprising to see summer associates and LOLcats — two creatures linked by their youth, their frequent proximity to food, their occasional fluffy nature, and, alas, their occasional misspellings — prompting relatively parallel debates among ATL readers (especially since those similarities prompted the use of LOLcats as pictures for the summer associate surveys).

And now that the summer programs are over and the on-campus interview season has begun, both debates are in full swing.

On the substantive front, a number of firms are heavily weighing the impact of summer programs on firm resources (like cash), and many are now narrowing their on-campus recruiting or even scrapping summer programs altogether in some offices, as Kash covered over here.

Meanwhile, on the fluffier front, the LOLcat debate also surged last week. Check out some of the funnier comments, and take today’s survey, after the jump.

Jingoistic competition is fun, but why should handing out medals be the sole province of the IOC? Athletes and David Rivkin should not be the only ones getting a taste of Olympic glory.

Here at ATL, we’ve put law firms on the (imaginary) field of competition and are now ready to reveal the gold medal winners in a number of sports.

After the jump, see the winners, and weigh in on which firms would be champions in sports we did not pick for prime time.

What a colossal d-bag. From the New York Daily News:

A Coney Island businessman is suing the city for damaging the Bentley he was driving when he killed a Brooklyn dad in a hit-and-run accident.

Harry Shasho, who pleaded guilty to leaving the scene of an accident, says the NYPD failed to safeguard the battered black 2005 Bentley GT luxury sedan that was impounded as evidence of the fatal crash. He’s asking for at least $190,000.

It sounds like Shasho needs a bit of a reality check:

Shasho says the Bentley was in “excellent condition … with no noticeable defects or damage” when he turned himself in, according to the suit filed in Brooklyn Federal Court.

The police report tells a different story. It describes the car as crumpled and the windshield “depressed and fractured” by the violent impact with [victim Louis] Couch that left his body parts strewn across the street.

The suit seeks damages from the city, the NYPD and the Brooklyn district attorney’s office.

Not the kind of case you’d like to take to a jury.

Hit-and-run driver claims city didn’t take care of his Bentley after crash [New York Daily News]

We’re back with another installment in our series of open threads on the Vault 100. This is an opportunity for insiders to sound off on their firms for the benefit of wannabe potential first-year and lateral associates.

Here are the next ten on the Vault list, with prestige scores in parentheses:

41. Baker Botts LLP (6.096)
42. King & Spalding LLP (6.066)
43. DLA Piper (6.039)
44. Baker & McKenzie (5.982)
45. Wilson Sonsini Goodrich & Rosati (5.976)
46. Boies, Schiller & Flexner LLP (5.974)
47. Morgan, Lewis & Bockius LLP (5.941)
48. Dewey & LeBoeuf (5.924)
49. Fulbright & Jaworski LLP (5.906)
50. McDermott, Will & Emery (5.892)

The most interesting set of “notable perks” in this bunch can be found at Boies Schiller. On the upside, there is an annual trip to Jamaica for attorneys and their families — in December, no less — but on the downside, it’s a “sweatshop run by a genius.” This makes us think of David Boies as the legal profession’s Santa Claus — who likes to take the elves to Montego Bay.

We invite the curious to ask questions about these firms, and for those in-the-know to take pity.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads - 2009

* A 72-year-old accountant from Minnesota challenged the IRS, and won. The accountant now wants a second Boston Tea Party. [Associated Press]

* Wilmer Hale has launched a series of associate blogs as part of a new recruiting effort. [BLT: The Blog of Legal Times]

* The Olympics aren’t the only thing bailing on Beijing. The managing partner for Cadwalader’s Beijing office is moving to Allen & Overy in Shanghai. [Law.com]

* Wrestlers Chris Kanyon, Raven and Above Average Mike are trying to smackdown the Vince McMahon in court. The three brought a class-action lawsuit against the WWE claiming that they are employees, not independent contractors. [Connecticut Employment Law Blog via Overlawyered]

* D.C. Circuit upholds constitutionality of Public Company Accounting Oversight Board. [Bloomberg via WSJ Law Blog]

* Former L.A. Times editorial page editor sues ex-girlfriend over “Grazer-gate” controversy; she claims it’s retaliation for a restraining order. [THR, Esq. via Gawker]

In a text message sent out at around 3 a.m. today, Senator Barack Obama announced his running mate: Senator Joseph R. Biden Jr., of Delaware.

Lawyers should be happy with Obama’s veep pick. There are lots of legal angles to Senator Biden:

• like Obama (Harvard Law ‘91), Joe Biden is a lawyer by training (Syracuse Law ‘68);
• he practiced law in Wilmington, Delaware, for a few years (before being elected to the U.S. Senate in 1972, at age 29);
• since 1991, he’s taught a seminar in constitutional law at Widener University School of Law; and
• he’s a longtime member, and former chairman (1987-1995), of the Senate Judiciary Committee.

Legal background aside, are you happy with Joe Biden as Obama’s VP nominee? Sound off, in the comments.

Biography: Joe Biden [Senator Joe Biden (official website)]
Obama chooses Sen. Joe Biden to be running mate [CNN]

* Say what? UT isn’t the top law school in Texas? [TaxProf Blog]

* As of now, Barack Obama hasn’t named his running mate. But who wants to be VP anyway? As Peter Feld observes, “in recent years, the vice presidential nomination has become a near-certain ticket to oblivion.” [Gawker]

* Mickey Mouse isn’t protected by copyright? Woo-hoo! Let’s use a picture of him to decorate this post. [Los Angeles Times]

* Supreme Courtships, the TV show, didn’t pan out. But maybe Supreme Courtship, the new Christopher Buckley book, will fare better. [Washington Post]

* How to go to law school like a porn star. Traci Bryant — an adult-film actress, licensed prostitute, and 1L — says it’s all about “thinking outside the box.” We have no doubt. [Bitter Lawyer]

Judges who hold people in contempt, or even jail them, for letting their cellphones go off in court — e.g., Robert Restaino, Diane Boswell — may be overreacting.

The same can’t be said for Judge Janet Booth, of Garrard County, Kentucky. Judge Booth just sent a woman to jail, for three days, for wearing short shorts to court.

This was completely justified. Short shorts do not belong in court. Nor do they belong in the office.

Fashion lesson over. Class dismissed.

P.S. And if you’re a guy, don’t forget to wear a tie to court — especially if you’re arguing before the Federal Circuit.

Judge jails woman for wearing short shorts [On the beat in the Bluegrass]
Note to West Coast Lawyers: The Federal Circuit Requires a Tie [WSJ Law Blog]

Earlier: Shorts Crack the Code [Dealbreaker]

This has probably already been done at some law school parody show or “law revue.” If so, feel free to point that out, in the comments.

But if not — of even if it has, but someone wants to revisit it, in light of the current (dismal) state of the legal job market — here are suggested lyrics for No Offer, No Cry (to the tune of Bob Marley’s No Woman, No Cry):

No offer, no cry
No offer, no cry

Said - said - said: I remember when we used to sit
In the career services office in law school,
Observing the Biglaw hypocrites
As they would mingle with the good people we meet.

Classmates we have, oh, classmates we’ve lost
Along the way.
In 3L interviewing, you can’t forget your past;
So dry your tears, I say.

Earlier this month, we raised the subject of cold offers. Now it’s time to talk about a topic we raised last year, but have not yet raised this year: the cold offer’s crueler cousin, the NO OFFER.

We hear that no-offering is on the rise — which is not surprising, given the tanking economy and Biglaw layoffs. Which law firms are doling out no-offers to their summer associates this year? Feel free to discuss, in the comments.

As always, caveat lector. Information in the comments has not been verified, and we make no representations or warranties as to its accuracy. Read at your own risk.

If you’d like to send us a tip that you are capable of vouching for — e.g., you were a summer at the firm in question — please email us (subject line: “No Offer - [Firm Name]”). For tips submitted via email, we will try to verify them if we can, and possibly revert to you with a list of no-offer factories (to use last year’s coinage). Thanks.

Earlier: Fall Recruiting Open Thread: Cold Offers
Fall Recruiting Open Thread: No-Offer Factories

The theme of yesterday’s LEWW was the hotness disparity between three glowing brides and their very lucky grooms. Today we’re delighted to report that the wedding gods stepped it up with our most recent batch of newlyweds. They’ve brought us four grooms who are at least as attractive as their brides or co-grooms. (And needless to say, all six of our newlyweds have the shiny credentials that you’ve come to expect from the Legal Eagle Wedding Watch.)

On to the finalists! Here they are:

1. Joanna Schwab and Nathan Pusey

2. Joseph Loy and Michael Kavey

3. Zoe Palitz and Brian Goldman

Click on the link below to find out more about these couples.

From a tipster: “Wow. Losing her seat really made Judge Halverson go over the edge… Oh, wait, it’s not her. Sorry, honest mistake.”

At almost 1,000 pounds, Mayra Lizbeth Rosales, 27, weighs about twice as much as Judge Halverson.

Half-ton woman indicted in slaying of nephew [CNN]

Are you tired of big firm life — doc review, due diligence, 9 p.m. dinners at your desk? Do you still hope that you can enjoy practicing law in a law firm setting? This week’s Job of the Week may be the answer for you.

As always, the Job of the Week is brought to you by Lateral Link. As we’ve mentioned before, Lateral Link is still growing, having just added a Columbia Law School alum to its Philadelphia team and an NYU Law School alum to its New York team. For more information about Lateral Link’s team of personal search consultants, or to learn about joining the team, click here.

Position: Corporate Associate

Location: New York

Description: This firm is one of the more selective New York boutiques, with approximately 50 attorneys, most of whom have lateraled in from top-20 law firms. The attorneys focus on sophisticated litigation, corporate, and bankruptcy work, and their major clients include Clear Channel, Amazon.com, Columbia University, and Lazard Freres. The firm pays New York market salary and offers its associates immediate, hands-on responsibility, as well as a reputation for very reasonable hours and a truly collegial working environment. The quality and depth of their legal team distinguishes them from other firms of their size and allows them to compete effectively against the larger top-tier firms. This position qualifies for the Lateral Link $10,000 guaranteed signing bonus.

For more information about this position or to apply, please see Position 9673 on Lateral Link. Current members can also contact their personal search consultant directly to discuss this position. Membership in Lateral Link is free and you can apply at www.laterallink.com.

A growing trend in criminal defense: invoking your modest endowment as exculpatory evidence.

Back in March, we wrote about this case, in which a Florida defendant argued that his penis was too small to inflict the injuries sustained by a rape victim. Now we hear about a more extreme version of the “size matters” defense, from the Houston Chronicle:

Houston’s 14th Court of Appeals on Tuesday upheld the conviction of a local doctor for indecent exposure.

The court rejected the argument by high-profile attorney Dick DeGuerin and his associate Neal Davis that the doctor could not have exposed himself to an undercover cop because that which is alleged to have been exposed is too small to have been seen.

Too small to be seen? Some defendants would rather serve time than rely upon this defense.

Alas, the defendant doctor got the worst of both worlds: the world now knows about his wee wee-wee, and he was convicted (with the conviction affirmed on appeal). Columnist Rick Casey sums it up:

The bottom line: This is a case that could be described as de minimis, a legal term defined by Black’s Law Dictionary as “1. Trifling, minimal. 2. (Of a fact or thing) so insignificant that a court may overlook it in deciding an issue or case.”

Quips our tipster: “So much for the myth that everything is bigger in Texas.”

Accused flasher loses ‘to small to see’ defense [Houston Chronicle via Legal Blog Watch]

Earlier: From the Department of Dubious Defenses: If the Trojan Mangum Don’t Fit, You Must Acquit

[Ed. note: This post is authored by Evan Jowers and Robert Kinney of Kinney Recruiting, sponsor of the Asia Chronicles. Kinney has made more placements of U.S. associates and partners in Asia than any other firm in the past two years. You can reach them by email at asia at kinneyrecruiting dot com.]

Last week we discussed some of the things law firm partners seek when staffing their overseas outposts in Asia. To be a successful associate, you need an entrepreneurial spirit, a high level of maturity for your experience level, and an outgoing personality (i.e., not overly academic). You should should be well put-together, presenting as little obvious risk of being a prima donna as possible. How do you know for yourself whether you cut the mustard under these factors — and how do you make it clear to those who interview you that you do?

Successful overseas lawyers have a high degree of entrepreneurial spirit. Let’s face it: you earn a few points just by being willing to leave the comfort of your life in the U.S. or U.K. and move overseas to Asia. Beyond this, law firm partners try to look at your past to determine your future. Were you a competitive athlete, moot court competitor, or actual entrepreneur at some point in your life? If you were, it’s important to bring this out in your resume and cover letter, as well as in your interviews, because these are experiences common among entrepreneurs. If you had experience prior to law school with scientific research, on the other hand, realize this sort of experience can signal to an astute interviewer that you may be happiest in a comfortable role, without much risk, and the rewards of sticking your neck out in the fast-paced world of Asian finance might not be strong motivators for you.

More information, after the jump.

If you were skeptical of the notion that Barack Obama never published anything as a member of the Harvard Law Review, your skepticism was justified. From Ben Smith and Jeffrey Ressner, over at Politico:

[A]n unsigned — and previously unattributed — 1990 article unearthed by Politico offers a glimpse at Obama’s views on abortion policy and the law during his student days, and provides a rare addition to his body of work.

The six-page summary, tucked into the third volume of the year’s Harvard Law Review, considers the charged, if peripheral, question of whether fetuses should be able to file lawsuits against their mothers. Obama’s answer, like most courts’: No.

As ATL readers know — see the posts collected under the Harvard Law Review category — ascertaining authorship of HLR student-written work can be controversial. How do we know Obama wrote this case comment?

The Obama campaign swiftly confirmed Obama’s authorship of the fetal rights article Thursday after a source told Politico he’d written it. The campaign also provided a statement on Harvard Law Review letterhead confirming that the unsigned piece was Obama’s - the only record of the anonymous authors is kept in the office of the Review president - and that records showed it was the only piece he’d written for the Review.

It’s pretty cool that “the only record of the anonymous authors is kept in the office of the Review president.” Like a Masonic temple, Gannett House is the repository of many secrets.

Having a hitherto unacknowledged case comment is better than having a hitherto unacknowledged baby girl.

Update: You can access a PDF of the Obama case comment over at TaxProf Blog.

Exclusive: Obama’s lost law review article [Politico]

Earlier: Barack Obama and the Harvard Law Review

Welcome to another post in the 2009 Vault 100 open thread series. You all seem to like having the law firms listed in groups of ten, so we’ll keep it up. Here are the thirty-something firms from the Vault 100, with prestige scores in parentheses:

31. Fried, Frank, Harris, Shriver & Jacobson LLP (6.461)
32. Freshfields Bruckhaus Deringer LLP (6.327)
33. Akin Gump Strauss Hauer & Feld LLP (6.313)
34. Winston & Strawn LLP (6.275)
35. Quinn Emanuel Urquhart Oliver & Hedges LLP (6.235)
36. Willkie Farr & Gallagher LLP (6.174)
37. Orrick, Herrington & Sutcliffe (6.173)
38. Allen & Overy LLP (6.147)
39. Cadwalader, Wickersham & Taft (6.131)
40. Proskauer Rose LLP (6.102)

Fried Frank and Cadwalader have been on the ATL radar of late. We broke news of staff layoffs at Fried Frank earlier this week, and news of the attorney bloodletting at Cadwalader last month. As noted in Cadwalader’s notable perks: “ouch, layoffs.” (Speaking of, in going through the Vault 100 list, we’ve discovered that Vault’s definition of “perk” is very different from ours.)

In the comments, the curious can pose questions, and the insiders can share insights. More threads to come.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads - 2009

* Federal judge grants stay of execution in Texas because the condemned man may be insane. Judge Orlando Luis Garcia chastised the state courts for refusing to hire mental health experts to assess the man’s sanity. [New York Times]

* Bush administration will implement a regulation to protect anti-abortion health workers. [Washington Post]

* Three members of the Warren Jeffs-led Texas polygamist sect are indicted. [CNN]

* Alan Dershowitz wants to depose recently captured Bosnian Serb war crimes suspect Radovan Karadzic. [Associated Press]

* Woman tries to free her convicted-murderer husband from jail by forging two judges’ signatures, feds claim. [San Jose Mercury News]

* Former paralegal makes out in the pregnancy discrimination lawsuit against Siegel, Fenchel & Peddy. The co-plaintiff associate didn’t do so well. [New York Law Journal]

* More advice for young lawyers from the good professor. [Punditry - Stephen Bainbridge]

* Consistent with that advice, when it comes to email, “think before you write” — or risk losing the protection of attorney-client privilege. [Business West]

* Think juries suck? You’re right. [Swordplay]

* A shout-out to ATL Idol, from the ABA Journal. [ABA Journal]

* Seven notable New Yorkers — including our colleague, Dealbreaker EIC John Carney — opine on presidential politics. [Time Out New York]

* Professor Jonathan Adler, on the AALS boycott. [Volokh Conspiracy via TaxProf Blog]

* If our length limit for this piece hadn’t been so short, we probably would have written something more like this (since we had a lot of the reporting). [New York Times]

We recently heard the following about Heller Ehrman:

1. Start dates for incoming associates have been pushed back to January 19, 2009. Associates are being offered a $10,000 stipend.

2. The firm has pulled out of on-campus interviewing (OCI) at several law schools, including UVA and UC-Davis.

We contacted the firm for comment. Spokesman Patrick Bustamante informed us that Heller has delayed the start date for fall associates to Tuesday, January 20, 2009 (because Monday the 19th is Martin Luther King, Jr. Day). These associates will receive a monthly stipend between November and January.

He also confirmed that the firm has withdrawn from OCI at some schools:

It’s not unusual for firms to change or cancel their on-campus interview plans as they refine their hiring goals in late summer. [Ed. note: “Guys in my high school…”]

Because we plan to hire fewer summer associates next summer, we did cancel our plans to interview at some schools and to focus on schools where we have been the most successful in the past.

A little bit more, after the jump.

A recent article in IP Law & Business suggested that rumors of the demise of IP specialty law firms have been greatly exaggerated. According to the piece, intellectual property boutiques continue to survive, despite encroachment on their turf by general-practice firms.

This is not to say, however, that everything is peachy in IP land. The article notes that Morgan & Finnegan, one prominent IP shop, “has lost 10 partners in the past year, and its overall head count is down considerably.” (We wonder if they included Jeremy Pitcock in the partner losses.)

The firm has been shedding associates and staff, too. Earlier this week, we heard from several tipsters that Morgan & Finnegan was laying off lawyers, technical and scientific advisors, and staff.

We confirmed the news with Pat Bowers, director of administration for Morgan & Finnegan. She acknowledged the layoffs (and even had the courage to use the “L” word, which many other firms shun).

The firm believes in “the importance of communication,” explained Bowers. “It’s not like we were doing it behind closed doors.” Prior to informing the affected employees, administration sent out a firm-wide email explaining that the firm was “scrutinizing our direct and indirect expenses, and looking at our staffing needs in New York and D.C.”

The affected employees were notified of the layoffs starting on Friday of last week and ending yesterday by close of business (so if you’re at the firm and haven’t heard anything, you’re in the clear). Bowers declined to provide exact numbers, citing confidentiality concerns, but said that (1) the firm “laid off less than 7 percent of attorneys and staff,” and (2) the cuts were centered on staff, not lawyers.

More details, below the fold.

The Olympics draw to a close this weekend, and soon we shall all forget how excited we were about weird sporting events like the hammer throw, the trampoline, and synchronized swimming.

Two lawyers made a good showing today in one-of-those-sports-we-barely-knew-existed-but-now-we’re-really-excited-about: the men’s Modern Pentathlon! Lithuanian attorneys Andrejus Zadneprovskis and Edvinas Krungolcas won the silver and bronze medals.

These lawyers are well-rounded guys. The Modern Pentathlon is an all-day event that involves shooting, fencing, swimming, riding, and running. From Reuters:

Modern pentathlon was designed to simulate what a soldier delivering a message under duress would go through. Pierre de Coubertin, the father of the modern Games, created it as a test of strength, technical ability, concentration and endurance….

The idea behind the sport is that a soldier is sent to deliver a message. He faces an enemy with a gun and shoots, then duels against others with a sword, swims across a river, rides an unfamiliar horse and then runs cross-country to his destination.

That’s impressive. If these two want to practice law in the States, Stoel might be interested in them, especially if they can throw some freestyle running into the mix.

P.S. It’s not just Lithuania that’s turning out lawyer-athletes; the United States is too. Fencer Sada Jacobson, who snagged a silver medal in the women’s individual sabre competition, is heading to law school in the fall, at the University of Michigan.

Russian Moiseev wins gold in men’s modern pentathlon [Reuters]
Upon Returning from Beijing, Fencing Champ Will Be Law School Bound [WSJ Law Blog]

Back in 2007, Judge Ernest B. Murphy won his libel case case against the Boston Herald. The Herald had reported that Murphy was soft on crime and, well, nobody puts Baby in the corner.

But winning just wasn’t enough for Judge Murphy. After he won he sent two threatening letters to Patrick Purcell, publisher of the Herald, on court stationery. The letters, which included the use of all-caps as pioneered by Chief Justice John Marshall, demanded that the Herald drop its appeal and hand deliver a check for half a million dollars more than the judgment, plus interest.

According to the Boston Globe, “Purcell testified that the letters were intimidating and looked like ransom notes.”

Yesterday, Murphy agreed to resign. Murphy claimed to have post-traumatic stress from his battle with the Herald. The Commission on Judicial Conduct had recommended a $25,000 fine, but they may amend their report in light of Murphy’s resignation.

We’d make a joke about how a judge could incur psychologically destructive stress from participating in a lawsuit, but we’re terrified that Murphy will sue us under the ADA.

Judge who sued Herald agrees to leave bench [Boston Globe via WSJ Law Blog]

Earlier: Murphy v. Boston Herald: Some Beantown Benchslappery

As some of you have noticed, we tend not to remark negatively on the innate physical attributes of our Legal Eagle contestants. There are several reasons for our reticence, but the most basic one is simply this: LEWW believes that prestige is beautiful. LEWW believes that every bride can look gorgeous on her special day if she has the right law degree. LEWW believes that a JD from HLS is like a great bra; it looks flimsy and has a jaw-dropping price tag, but it will support you and make you look better than you deserve.

Having made much of our reluctance to comment disparagingly about our subjects’ appearance, we’ll promptly depart from our own custom and announce that this is Hotness Disparity Week on LEWW. All of our grooms are decent-looking but undeniably average Joes, and we submit to you that all of them have married up.

See if you agree with us. Here are the couples:

1. Uma Amuluru and John Theis

2. Dena Fayad and David Guggenheim

3. Courtney Gregoire and Scott Lindsay

Click on the link below to read about these couples.

Earlier today, the American Lawyer published a report detailing declining profit margins in the legal industry.

It is nice to see that somebody commissioned an entire report to figure out obvious facts like “the first half of 2008 looks very different from the previous six years” and “[t]he slowdown is hitting the most profitable firms the hardest.” In other breaking news, Britney Spears’s career has hit a bump in the road.

Instead of a simple doom-and-gloom economic report, Am Law columnist (and Biglaw banker) Dan DiPietro offers this proposed solution to all the law firm ills: fire the associates!

“There is a silver lining. A bad year (and the numbers suggest 2008 will be even more trying than 2001, when partner profits were down slightly) will enable firms to take steps that partners would resist in a good year — winnowing out unproductive lawyers and applying greater discipline to expense control.”

Silver lining?

Partners, pundits, and others who like to play McKinsey & Co. on the weekends always suggest this form of fat cutting in tough economic times. But it is a disingenuous solution.

Read why, after the jump.

One of our favorite law professor bloggers, Stephen Bainbridge, chimes in on yesterday’s summer associate scandal story. His commentary appears here.

Our general view of the matter was summed up by a commenter: “Guys from my high school used to seal the deal with girls from college all the time. It was no big deal.” Professor Bainbridge begs to differ.

P.S. Same rules apply. Please don’t name any individuals in the comments — including, but not limited to, the summer associate, the college intern, or the associate who brought the SA’s conduct to the attention of the hiring partner. Thanks.

Advice for Young Law Firm Associates: Don’t Poop Where You Eat [Punditry - Professor Bainbridge]

Earlier: Summer Associate of the Day: The Cradle Robber

Update: Take our reader poll:

This advertisement, from tiny divorce and bankruptcy firm Davis and Millard, appeared in an Atlanta magazine in June:

We get confusing messages. With the curly font and all the pink, it seems like it should be an ad for lip gloss for teens. But the menacing way the woman grips that rolling pin puts fear in our hearts. The color motif and menace bear a striking similarity to this Serial Mom movie poster.

The text at the top of the ad — “Moving on means never having to talk to your mother-in-law again” — reminds us a bit of this earlier advertisement: “Life’s short. Get a divorce.”

Late last night, a tipster told us of “a big round of administrative staff cuts” at Duane Morris. They were centered on the Philadelphia mothership, but also included other offices. As for the extent of the layoffs, “no good sense of how many, but big enough that the local managing partner fired off an email encouraging folks to come by his office and ask questions.”

This morning brings confirmation of the cuts, from the National Law Journal:

Duane Morris, an international law firm with Philadelphia roots, has cut about 18% of its marketing and business development staff, making staff reductions that echo moves at other firms in recent months.

The firm, which has about 650 attorneys, now has a marketing and business development team of 30 to 35 people, after eliminating seven managers and staff and hiring three more senior executives in the past few months, said Ed Schechter, the firm’s chief marketing officer.

Most of the eliminated jobs were in Philadelphia, where the bulk of the department’s staff is based, but some were in other offices, including Chicago.

True to form, they’re chalking it up to enhancing efficiency, rather than the tanking economy:

At Duane Morris, cost-cutting was a “secondary” consideration, with the firm primarily interested in building up a more experienced and leaner team, Schechter said in an interview.

Reductions in force don’t sound very conductive to “building up” a “more experienced” team. But a “leaner” one, certainly.

Duane Morris cuts marketing, business development staff [National Law Journal]

In connection with on-campus interviewing season, we’re giving you a chance to assess the firms that made this year’s Vault 100 list of most prestigious law firms. The previous open threads listed firms in groups of five, but to up the pace, we’ll list them by ten from here on out. Here’s the next group, with prestige scores in parentheses:

21. O’Melveny & Myers LLP (6.815)
22. Clifford Chance LLP (6.772)
23. Jones Day (6.763)
24. Morrison & Foerster LLP (6.657)
25. Hogan & Hartson LLP (6.579)
26. Linklaters (6.574)
27. Milbank, Tweed, Hadley & McCloy (6.512)
28. Ropes & Gray LLP (6.501)
29. Mayer, Brown, Rowe & Maw LLP (6.494)
30. Paul, Hastings, Janofsky & Walker (6.481)

We note Magic Circle firm Linklaters making a big leap from the high 30s in the 2008 list to #26 this year — perhaps because its “notable perks” include group retreats to Europe, a drinks trolley, and an on-site doctor and dentist.

Compare. Contrast. Discuss. Thanks.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads - 2009

* It looks like 2008 will be the worst year for law firms since 2001. The American Lawyer says the “silver lining” is that firms can “winnow out unproductive lawyers and apply greater discipline to expense control.” In other words: more layoffs, fewer perks. [American Lawyer]

* Law firms aren’t the only ones suffering. Florida courts will cut 250 positions by October 1. [Daily Business Review]

* Senator Ted Stevens fails to get his corruption trial relocated from Washington, D.C. to Alaska. His need to be in his home state to campaign for reelection did not convince the judge. [Washington Post]

* “Metrolink killer” — who left his gas-doused SUV on the California rails, causing a train crash that killed 11 people — has been sentenced to 11 consecutive life sentences. [Los Angeles Times]

* University of Iowa professor Arthur Miller, accused of trading grades for gropes, has gone missing. [Iowa City Press-Citizen via TaxProf Blog]

* “Dancing baby” lawsuit can go forward. [Associated Press]

Here’s an idea for how Cadwalader, Wickersham & Taft — America’s Firingest Law Firm™, which laid off 35 lawyers in January, and then 96 more last month — can keep its surviving attorneys (plus all those incoming first-years) gainfully employed.

Have them work on the litigation over managing partner Robert Link’s Hamptons house.

Cadwalader Managing Partner In Hamptons Real Estate Squabble [Am Law Daily]
Robert O. Link, Jr. v. Richard Sarcona: Complaint (PDF) [Am Law Daily]
3 Halsey Path, Southampton, NY [Zillow]

Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of Robert Link (scroll down)
Prior ATL coverage of CWT (scroll down)

“Lolita, light of my life, fire of my law firm. My sin, my soul, my summer intern. Lo-lee-ta: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. Lo. Lee. Ta.”

Now that summer associate programs are over, and most summers have offers safely in hand, it’s a good (read: safe) time to dish about SA scandals. If you have a story to share that we haven’t previously covered, please email us.

Here’s one story that is making the rounds. We’ve omitted the firm name because the summer class was not very large. Per our usual rules, please don’t name the summer associate (or the college student) in the comments.

After a firm-sponsored event, a college student interning at the firm went out for drinks with several summer and full-time associates. She was not old enough to be drinking.

The college intern, in a state of inebriation, left the bar hanging all over one of the summer associates (hereinafter “The Cradle Robber”). Later that evening, the Cradle Robber wrote an email to several associates, claiming that “the deal was sealed” with the college intern.

An associate forwarded the email to the hiring partner. The Cradle Robber did not receive an offer.

Read our take on this series of events, after the jump.

Reasons for reading ATL vary from person to person. But we have been told by some people that one of the greatest benefits of following the site is gaining familiarity with law firms and the differences between them.

In that vein, we shall continue on with our series of open threads on the Vault 100. (Sorry, haters! Though we are taking under advisement the idea that we list them in groups of ten from this point forward.)

Here are the next five, with prestige scores in parentheses:

16. Gibson, Dunn & Crutcher LLP (7.056)
17. Wilmer Cutler Pickering Hale and Dorr LLP (7.055)
18. White & Case LLP (7.054)
19. Shearman & Sterling LLP (7.043)
20. Arnold & Porter LLP (6.905)

Of the five, White & Case has the most bizarre list of notable perks: “Gender- and reason-neutral flexible work arrangement program” (what does that mean?), “Cold, anonymous” (yippee?), and “Dinosaur” (the ferocious or the fossilized kind?).

Time to compare and contrast. We invite you to have at it.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads- 2009

Good news for Legal Eagle Wedding Watchers: LEWW will be returning to a more frequent and timely posting schedule! Beginning next week, we’ll once again feature our gold standard of three fabulous couples per week to ogle and dissect.

We’ll bring you more hot August weddings tomorrow and Friday, but for now, it’s time for our readers to vote on a Couple of the Month for July. Although their write-up wasn’t in the NYT and therefore didn’t run in our normal LEWW column, we’re including celebrity professors Samantha Power and Cass Sunstein, whose union merited LEWW bonus coverage last month (as well as a shout-out in the Washington Post’s Reliable Source column).

For more information on these newlyweds, click on the link below. When you’re ready to vote, here’s the poll:

Tropical Storm Fay — what a beeatch! Doesn’t she know the job market is tough enough as it is?

The rising 2Ls at the University of Florida are really getting screwed because of Tropical Storm Fay. This thing hasn’t even hit land and is not even remotely near our school (but admittedly, probably is near the homes of some of the interviewers), yet the school has canceled the first three days of Early Interview Week OCI.

This is when many of the Biglaw / otherwise “good” employers come. All the firms are supposed to reschedule the interviews. But especially for the interviewers from non-Florida firms/offices, what [are the chances] that they’re going to make the effort to come back? Even if they do, by now they’ve probably started interviewing students from “better” schools.

Our correspondent wonders how other Florida law schools and law firms are dealing with the storm. If you have info to share, feel free to chime in.

Announcement emails from the career services office at UF, after the jump.

We received about 600 responses to this week’s ATL / Lateral Link survey on associate reviews, and there were some interesting twists.

First, while most firms, 60%, only conduct reviews once a year, a growing number, 35%, are providing six-month reviews as well.

A handful of firms split the difference, conducting six-month reviews for laterals and first-year associates, but then defaulting back to once a year. Others are conducting mid-year reviews for “underperforming” associates only, which doesn’t appear to be a great recipe for great press.

Of course, not many associates think that they’re underperforming:

 * Almost 90% of respondents said that their reviews were “positive” (29%) or “very positive” (57%).
 * Only 6% of respondents said that their reviews were “negative,” and only one percent thought they were “very negative.”
 * The remaining 7% thought their reviews were simply “neutral.”

But even though almost 90% of respondents thought their reviews went well, that doesn’t mean they thought the reviews were fair. In fact, about a quarter of associates who thought their reviews were positive still said that they were actually more likely to look for a new job in light of those reviews.

Find out more about how associates reviewed their reviews, after the jump.

A tipster pointed out that NYU has revamped their website.

According to the tipster, “It’s hilariously awful and probably can indicate to the Violet alumni [at ATL] just how uncool the student body has become.”

This new web presence can only be understood as a direct challenge to former NYU students to find and pummel current NYU students. It’s about honor at this point.

If you don’t believe us, we invite you to click on Ping-Pong Man. If you do, you will learn that NYU students now are advised to make ping-pong play dates, that the game of ping-pong loosely resembles the Socratic method, and that Richard Posner has been called out.

There is also a student that informs us that her favorite NYC coffee shop still sells coffee “by the cup.” Great tip! So many New Yorkers still must suck their coffee out of a hose.

We think ping-pong man and cup girl should merge their interests and hang out where real NYU students spend their free time. Luckily, organizing beer-pong (or Beirut … discuss) is still easy enough to do over at Off the Wagon.

In honor of the new Vault rankings, we’re doing a series of open threads on the 100 most prominent law firms. We invite you to compare and contrast the firms in the comments. In the last open thread on Vault firms 6-10, there was an animated discussion about litigation at Cleary and which Kirkland office is best to work for.

Moving on down the Vault 100 list, here’s the next bunch up for discussion, with prestige scores in parentheses:

11. Covington & Burling LLP (7.428)
12. Debevoise & Plimpton LLP (7.417)
13. Paul, Weiss, Rifkind, Wharton & Garrison LLP (7.290)
14. Williams & Connolly LLP (7.238)
15. Sidley Austin LLP (7.201)

The oddest language in the “notable perks” in this bunch is at Williams & Connolly: “Fancy bunch of smarties.” Well-dressed intelligent lawyers, or a big basket of the tart candy?

Please discuss the work, perks, and lifestyle at these firms in the comments. More threads to come.

Earlier: Vault 100 Open Threads- 2009

* College presidents around the country join campaign to lower the national drinking age to 18. [Associated Press]

* Post-September 11 laws have allowed the federal government to track the movement of U.S. citizens across land borders, with the data to be kept on record for 15 years. Is anyone really surprised? [Washington Post]

* Another judicial setback for the Bush administration, in the D.C. Circuit’s ruling on EPA emissions rules. [New York Times]

* New York settles suit with antiwar activists for $20 $2 million. [New York Times]

* Apparently, corporal punishment in schools is still legal in 21 states, and practiced in 13. [CNN]

* Lawyers shouldn’t screw over their clients. And definitely shouldn’t screw their clients’ wives. It’s going to cost one Mississippi lawyer $1.5 million. [ABA Journal]

* Lawyers are making out well in the Britney Spears custody battle. [CNN]

The law firm of Reed Smith — which, as its Google listing reminds us, is “[o]ne of the 15 largest law firms in the world” — has been in the news a lot lately. Here’s a quick recap.

Some of the news has been good, and some not-so-good. Let’s get the bad news over with first.

Last month, a Pennsylvania state court judge gave the green light to an overbilling lawsuit brought by a former Reed Smith client — a non-profit organization, no less. From the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review:

A Lawrence County Common Pleas Court judge rejected four of five objections by the Downtown law firm Reed Smith, which was sued by a youth foster-care foundation in a dispute over fees.

Bair Foundation, New Wilmington, Lawrence County, sued Reed Smith in November for billing it nearly $1 million — in contrast to the firm’s early estimate of $112,000 in legal costs — to defend the foundation in an employment discrimination lawsuit, according to the complaint.

The $112,000 was a revised estimate; the original estimate, according to the complaint, was $50,000. And Reed Smith’s client ended up losing in the underlying lawsuit.

According to Am Law Daily, “[t]he matter has turned into something of a public relations nightmare for Reed Smith…. The complaint paints a picture of a billing machine run amok.” For its part, the firm denies the allegations and claims that it “will prevail.”

More Reed Smith news, after the jump.

[Ed. note: This is the farewell post of FROLIC & DETOUR, who was recently eliminated from ATL Idol, the “reality blogging” competition that picked ATL’s new editor. It is marked with F&D’s avatar (at right).]

I’ve speculated about whether Sophist and I know each other. Well, we do. We wrote the HLS Parody together. Now I know that Shawn Johnson wasn’t BSing when she said she was thrilled that her team finished 1-2 in the all-around. I got the silver, but they’re playing my national anthem.

Shortly after Elie won his job, I accepted an offer I’d been hoping for. As soon as I wind things up at the firm, I’ll be starting a new job in the law school world. Gold on beam! I think this worked out the right way for everyone. Thanks for the ride.

Love,
Frolic

Last week we covered some goings-on — or non-goings-on, to those of you who found them boring — at Shearman & Sterling. Here’s a quick update.

We reported that, according to the firm, there have been no staff layoffs. One source writes:

I’d like to know how they define administrative staff, as they laid off their entire word processing / document production center (i.e legal word processors, proofreaders, EDGAR operators, and supervisors) in February 2007. It has since been disastrously outsourced….

Outsourcing from a year and a half ago isn’t what we had in mind when we asked about recent layoffs. But we pass that along, for what it’s worth; we do aim to be accurate.

In the comments, there were some rumors about start dates for 2009 associates. We’re looking into the rumors and will report back. If you can confirm, please email us.

Update: We’re still waiting for official word from the firm, but one Shearman offeree confirms that yes, start dates for incoming associates next year will be no earlier than November 30, 2009.

Finally, we wondered whether there might be an interesting story surrounding the one out of 140 summer associates who didn’t get an offer. It turns out that there is.

Find out what it takes to get no-offered by Shearman these days, after the jump.

A recent bar passer sent this query into Freakonomics:

I recently passed the bar and am currently applying for jobs. My main concern is bringing out the most charitable result. Should I work in the nonprofit section where my services are passed directly along to the most needy, or should I get the high-paying firm job and donate the difference in my salary to charity?

A certain Harvard Law School grad might say, “Do the right thing at every moment” — and avoid the Big Bad Law Firm. But Freakonomics blogger Stephen Dubner seems more skeptical of public interest work:

I am not so convinced that working for a nonprofit means that one’s “services are passed directly along to the most needy.” Here’s one reason why.

One Freakonomics commenter’s response to the question of “public interest v. Biglaw”: neither.

If you want to make the most “charitable result”, you’re too late. Lawyers rarely add any value to the economy (after all, this IS an economics blog). Lawyers don’t make anything but they consume large amounts of capital, both human and financial. Had you wanted to be a net contributor to society, an MBA or engineering degree or medical degree or some such would have been the way to go or even just start a small business. This would allow you to actually produce something of value. A law degree only allows you to add friction to the economy….

Scrap the law degree, start a company, get rich, buy a big house and a big boat, give generously when you can and do what Buffett and Gates are doing, give it all away when you’re finished. Nothing wrong with that at all. That would be a life well lived.

ATL readers, what do you advise?

Our Daily Bleg: How Can You Maximize Your Charity? [Freakonomics / NYT]

Earlier: Working in Biglaw = Killing Babies?

My name is ELIE YING MYSTAL, f/k/a SOPHIST, and it looks like I will be taking over day-to-day editorial responsibilities here at Above the Law.

I would like to thank everybody who read anything that I’ve written over the past three weeks. I’ve always found writing to be a deeply personal experience and so I truly appreciate it when somebody bothers to read my work. Whether any of you actually liked it is a different question entirely, but one that we can work on together.

I’d also like to applaud the other contestants for their efforts. The best writing and journalism is almost always a collaborative process. I was impressed with what the other contestants were able to produce without the editors and other colleagues available to most professional writers. I hope this contest has given you all additional confidence about your own skills and talents.

I intend to rely heavily on the structures already in place here at ATL during this transition and beyond. I will learn everything I can from David Lat short of going “Sylar” with his brain. I was ecstatic to learn that many of the regular contributors to this site will be staying on. I will read as many comments as time allows, and try to draw out the “constructive” aspects hidden among the criticism.

I want to get better at this, and I will take advice on how to accomplish that in whatever form it is available.

More about me after the jump.

As promised, we bring you an update on yesterday’s coverage of staff layoffs at Fried Frank. Here are a few additional details, from the National Law Journal (subscription):

Fried, Frank, Harris, Shriver & Jacobson is reducing administrative staff in New York and Washington. The reductions, which a firm spokeswoman said were less than 10% of the law firm’s 730 staffers firmwide, affect primarily floating secretaries, part-time assistants and paralegals and library personnel.

The layoffs, first reported on AboveTheLaw.com, resulted from the law firm’s review of its administrative resources and staffing requirements. The employees will receive severance packages based on years of service, the spokeswoman said.

Update / Correction: One source questions the claim that the layoffs affected “primarily” floaters and part-time assistants. According to this tipster, many of the laid off employees were full-time, senior secretaries — a number of them over 50, and some just a few months shy of getting their pensions. This source predicts that age discrimination lawsuits will be filed.

One tipster tells us the number of affected employees was in the range of 50 to 60, which would amount to under 10 percent of 730 staffers, and that severance amounted to one week of pay for every year of service. We also hear this:

Apparently, mail room, duplicating and facilities were told that their jobs were being outsourced by the end of the year. They could start looking for new jobs before getting laid off at the end of the year or apply with the outsourcing agencies (with no guarantees of a job or placement at Fried Frank).

New York staff were given “a few minutes to pack up and get out”; cars were provided to take people home (a nice touch — hopefully that will become “market”). One source claims that employees were laid off without regard to their seniority or their performance reviews, whether negative or positive.

What about attorneys? A spokesperson emphasized to us that Fried Frank “doesn’t do lawyer layoffs,” which was reiterated to associates by firm chair Valerie Ford Jacob at a meeting yesterday.

(Jacob also claimed that the firm has never laid off lawyers. But one source at FFHSJ begs to differ. This source claims that the firm laid off attorneys back in 1990, and then “suffered years of recruiting problems because of it,” which may explain its reluctance to go down that path today.)

More detail about the meeting, after the jump.

Former Supreme Court clerks, also known as the Elect, have no shortage of job opportunities. And a new development in state government is giving them even more. From the National Law Journal:

A trend among states in recent years to appoint a solicitor general has increased opportunities for young attorneys to get into court and ultimately return to private practice far from Washington, the traditional heart of the nation’s appellate bar.

In the past decade, a dozen states, including California, Florida and North Carolina, have added state solicitor generals [sic], many of whom oversee large staffs, said Dan Schweitzer, Supreme Court counsel for the National Association of Attorneys General. Nationwide, 37 states have a solicitor general, he said.

“There are a lot more appellate positions that attract top-notch lawyers,” Schweitzer said.

There are shout-outs to several hot young lawyers whose names should be familiar to ATL readers.

Find out who, after the jump.

We’re back with the next installment of open threads on the Vault 100 law firms.

A particularly insightful comment from the last post on the top five firms:

[Davis Polk & Wardwell] and [Sullivan & Cromwell] do very similar work. DPW has a stronger underwriters’ practice, Sullivan is marginally better on the issuer side. DPW is much stronger than anyone at converts. Sullivan does more edgy contested M&A while DPW excels at deals with cutting edge securities components.

Sullivan is a slightly better place to work than its reputation. DPW generally lives up to its strong rep as a good place to work.

Now on to the next five from Vault, with their prestige scores in parentheses:

6. Simpson Thacher & Bartlett LLP (7.985)
7. Latham & Watkins LLP (7.784)
8. Cleary, Gottlieb, Steen & Hamilton LLP (7.754)
9. Weil, Gotshal & Manges LLP (7.623)
10. Kirkland & Ellis LLP (7.473)

The most notable of “notable perks” in this batch is at Kirkland, where NYC associates get a “$350 office art budget” (previously reported here). Can associates use the money to commission work from their toddlers?

Please compare and contrast the firms in the comments. We’ll continue to work our way down the Vault list in future threads.

The Top 100 Most Prestigious Law Firms [Vault]

Earlier: Fall Recruiting Open Thread: Vault 1-5 (2009)

* Obama and McCain name their least favorite Supreme Court justices. McCain hates four of them; Obama focused his hatin’ on just one. [Legal Times]

* The legal battle over the 2008 presidency gets started in Ohio. “The Ohio Republican Party yesterday threatened legal action if Ohio Secretary of State Jennifer Brunner allows Ohioans to simultaneously register to vote and cast absentee ballots…” [Toledo Blade]

* Senators want to delay new rules for FBI national security investigations, because everyone’s a little bit racist. [Associated Press]

* Princeton Review joins the ranks of companies that have exposed customers’ personal information. The test scores and personal data of thousands of Virginia and Florida students were inadvertently made accessible online for weeks. [New York Times]

* Self-described “antifeminist” lawyer goes after Columbia University’s department of women’s studies. [City Room / New York Times via Jezebel]

* Our favorite American-themed international headline of the day: “US lesbian wins fertility battle.” [BBC News]

Apologies for the delay. We had to wait for Vizu to certify the poll results as anomaly-free, which they just did.

Congratulations to the winner of our ATL Idol “reality blogging” competition, who will become Above the Law’s new editor-in-chief: SOPHIST!!! With almost 1900 votes cast, SOPHIST (avatar at right) prevailed over your other finalist, FROLIC AND DETOUR, by a 60-40 margin.

In a subsequent post, Sophist will introduce himself to the readership in more detail. The handover of day-to-day editorial duties will take place sometime later this month.

Based on some of your comments, we’d like to clarify two things.

First, we will continue to write for Above the Law and to play an active role in its development. As reported in the Legal Times and FishbowlNY, among other places, we’re moving into the position of Managing Editor for Breaking Media, ATL’s parent company. Part of our new job includes overseeing Above the Law. So we’ll be working closely with Sophist to take Above the Law to ever greater heights (or lows, as appropriate). We will continue to blog for ATL, perhaps in a column of some sort, as well as on other occasions (e.g., coverage of events we attend; additional support during busy news periods; filling in for Sophist when he goes on vacation).

Second, your faithful Associate Editor, Kashmir Hill, will also still write for the site. Although she did not wish to be considered for the EIC position — for more on why, see her personal blog — she will remain as an active presence here. The same is true of ATL’s other contributors, including our surveys guru, Justin Bernold, and our Legal Eagle Wedding Watcher, Laurie Lin. Many of the things you enjoy about ATL will remain unchanged.

As we previously mentioned, the ATL Idol contest was a huge hit here at ATL, by a variety of measures (including traffic / pageviews, reader comments, and revenue). We thank our six finalists for their excellent efforts, as well as everyone else who expressed interest in the position; our three guest judges, Ann Althouse, Tom Goldstein, and Dahlia Lithwick; and you, our readers, who enlivened the contest with your commentary — and who picked the winner, with your votes.

Once again, congratulations to SOPHIST. He survived three weeks of grueling guest blogging, including tough love from the celebrity judges, hard knocks from the commenters, and formidable competition from the other finalists. He is clearly ready for the challenge of taking ATL into a new and even more glorious era. (And since you picked him, you are estopped from criticizing him in the comments.)

Please extend a warm welcome to SOPHIST — and to Above the Law 2.0!

Earlier: Prior ATL Idol coverage (scroll down)

* Nationwide Layoff Watch: Nannies. [Dealbreaker]

* Was Findlaw gaming Google? Bad, Findlaw, bad. [Real Lawyers Have Blogs]

* Stupid Patent Case of the Week? [Mendelson’s Musings]

* We knew him way back when: a profile of Atlanta AUSA Jon-Peter Kelly (with whom we went to high school and college). [Fulton County Daily Report]

* Blawg Review #173 — with a swimming theme. [Chicago IP Litigation Blog via Blawg Review]

If legal novelist John Grisham and Da Vinci Code author Dan Brown were to get together and make a literary baby, it would look a lot like our lawsuit of the day. From London’s Daily Telegraph:

The heirs of the Knights Templar have launched a legal battle in Spain to force the Pope to restore the reputation of the disgraced order which was accused of heresy and dissolved seven centuries ago.

The Association of the Sovereign Order of the Temple of Christ, whose members claim to be descended from the legendary crusaders, have filed a lawsuit against Benedict XVI calling for him to recognise the seizure of assets worth 100 billion euros [$150 billion USD].

They claim that when the order was dissolved by his predecessor Pope Clement V in 1307, more than 9,000 properties as well as countless pastures, mills and other commercial ventures belonging to the knights were appropriated by the church.

1307? It seems like the statute of limitations has run out on that one. (Or “prescriptive period” per Spain’s civil law system.)

The Pope has the Vatican to blame for inspiring the lawsuit:

The legal move by the Spanish group comes follows the unprecedented step by the Vatican towards the rehabilitation of the group when last October it released copies of parchments recording the trials of the Knights between 1307 and 1312.

The papers lay hidden for more than three centuries having been “misfiled” within papal archives until they were discovered by an academic in 2001.

Apparently, the Knights hope the suit will help improve their reputation, sullied by age-old accusations of worshipping Satan, denying Jesus, and practicing sodomy. It seems more likely that they’ll have a new accusation added to the list: filing frivolous and unsuccessful lawsuits.

Knights Templar heirs in legal battle with the Pope [Daily Telegraph via NPR]

Last week we started hearing rumors of imminent staff layoffs at Fried Frank. The rumors have now come true, as we’ve been hearing from multiple sources. Today appears to be the big day.

We submitted an inquiry to the firm. A spokesperson issued the following statement:

Over two years ago Fried Frank began a review of its administrative resources and staffing requirements. As part of this review process some departments were expanded and others consolidated.

Today’s administrative staff reductions are part of that business review process. Those affected are in the Firm’s NY and Washington DC offices. Severance and career counseling were offered to all of those affected.

We aren’t sure of the numbers (and the firm has not yet responded to our request for that data). One of the rumors from last week said the number could be as high as 10 percent of total staff headcount. We hear that in the D.C. office, at least eight or nine people have been laid off, as of the time of this posting. The numbers in New York are said to be significantly higher than in Washington.

The affected employees include secretaries, paralegals, and library personnel. Severance packages appear to vary, from as low as seven weeks to as high as three months.

People are being called in and given the bad news individually. But meetings are also being held at 3:30 and 4:00 p.m. in D.C. (It’s not clear what New York is doing.)

One staffer in New York was given 30 minutes to pack up all belongings and leave the premises. In Washington, however, that’s not happening; one source describes that office as “more humane.”

We will bring you more information as the story develops. If you have information to share, please email us.

[Ed. note: Ted Frank’s posts analyzing presidential candidate Barack Obama’s tax plan, available here and here, were some of the most popular in ATL history. They generated over 900 comments and thousands of pageviews. Because there have been some developments on this front since February, when Ted Frank first issued his analysis, we requested an update; he kindly obliged.]

Above the Law’s Fearless Leader David Lat asked me to update my earlier posts on Obama’s tax plan. As you recall, Obama made a series of promises of “fixing” the tax code, mostly on the backs of investors and the upper middle-class — like Biglaw associates.

I ran a spreadsheet that showed that, with reasonable assumptions, those tax increases would have the same effect on associate after-tax income as a New York law firm cutting salaries by $34,000, but permitted one to change the assumptions if you disagreed with the assumptions I made. I made no endorsements, noting that, Thomas “no relation” Frank notwithstanding, taxes and economic issues were not the only reason to vote for a presidential candidate. (Still, commenters’ reactions can best be described by Tyler Cowen’s description of “Obama insecurity”: “For some people no comment on Obama, other than the purely laudatory, is anything other than a hackish right-wing attempt to forge an alliance of lies with Karl Rove and his ilk.”)

Since then, Obama’s two top economic advisors have posted a Wall Street Journal editorial and a website giving somewhat more detail to the Obama tax plan. David asked me to update my post.

1. The most notable change is Obama’s social security tax plan. Recall that his original promise was to simply lift the cap, changing the system from a pay-in to income-redistribution — something that would have cost law firm associates thousands or tens of thousands and raised marginal tax rates to nearly 60%. When Hillary Clinton started hitting him hard about it, he backed off his original plan to make social security taxes uniform and said he might (but might not) add a “doughnut-hole” between $97,000 and $150,000 or $200,000 or $250,000.

Now that Obama has clinched the nomination and is pretending to be a centrist for the general election, after the Wall Street Journal hit him hard about it, Obama pushed everything he promised in the primaries overboard. First, he said he would raise taxes not the full 12.4%, but just “2 to 4%” — so much for making Warren Buffett pay the same rate as his secretary. The latest is that Obama will avoid any tax changes in social security until 2019, i.e., punting the problem into President Jindal’s lap. So zero out the social security tax increases, unless Obama changes his mind for a fourth time. (People at my high school backed off of plans for trillion-dollar tax increases when faced with outrage from Above the Law commenters all the time. It was no big deal.)

Read more, after the jump.

As reported last week, the Vault 2009 law firm rankings are out. You can find Vault’s ranking of the top 100 most prestigious firms here.

As observed by one astute commenter, “the prestige rankings will tell you nothing about the quality of your work experience.” In order to address this, we are relaunching a popular feature from last year: a series of open threads on the Vault 100 firms, organized in batches of five, to allow for comparative discussion (and gossip) about perks, hours, recruiting standards, firm life, etc.

We’re starting with the top five firms — and experiencing a bit of déjà vu, since the list is identical to last year’s (although the prestige scores, indicated parenthetically, have changed a little):

1. Wachtell, Lipton, Rosen & Katz (8.777)
2. Cravath, Swaine & Moore LLP (8.732)
3. Sullivan & Cromwell LLP (8.257)
4. Skadden, Arps, Slate, Meagher & Flom LLP (8.135)
5. Davis Polk & Wardwell (8.070)

Cravath is closer than last year to passing Wachtell in the rankings. Perhaps the bedbugs prevented CSM from retaking the top position, which it held back in the 2003 rankings. We’re amused that Vault lists this as a Cravath “notable perk”: “Grinds associates into a fine, self-important powder.”

Please discuss and compare the top five. More threads to come.

The Top 100 Most Prestigious Law Firms [Vault]

Earlier: Rejoice: The 2009 Vault Rankings Are Out!, Fall Recruiting Open Thread: Vault 1-5 (2008 edition) and Fall Recruiting Open Thread: Vault 96-100 (2008 edition — with links to all of last year’s posts).

One of the more contentious issues in the legal profession this year is whether firms are conducting “stealth” layoffs, or simply culling non-performing associates after bad reviews.

Even among firms doling out these bad reviews, many say that performance standards have gotten tougher during the down market. Other firms, however, claim that their firms’ standards remain the same, and that the downsized departing associates simply didn’t measure up.

In today’s ATL / Lateral Link survey, we’ll focus a bit more on the review side of the equation. How often does your firm give real feedback, and do you think it’s actually fair?

Update: This survey is now closed. Click here for the results.

—
Justin Bernold is a Director at Lateral Link, the sponsor of this Associate Life Survey.

The embarrassing Google hit is one of the great new fears of the modern age. If the number-one Google hit for your name is your work bio, Corporate Challenge race-time results, or nothing at all, consider yourself lucky. You could have something worse, like, “Kashmir Hill. Is that her real name or her porn screen name?” Or something much worse, like the derogatory comments that spurred the Autoadmit lawsuit.

Seattle lawyer Shakespear Feyissa is in a Google predicament. He wants a ten-year-old article removed from his college newspaper’s archives. The school administrators say sure, but the college newspaper editors are adamantly opposed. We love principled undergrads. From the Seattle Times:

While a senior at [Seattle Pacific University] 10 years ago, Feyissa was arrested on suspicion of attempted sexual assault and suspended. He was never charged, but the suspension stuck — indefinitely.

Feyissa complained that his punishment was more severe because of his race, he told the student newspaper at the time, but an investigation dismissed his claim.

He’s a lawyer now, and that article — still among the first hits for Feyissa’s name on Google — continues to hurt him personally and professionally, he said. So Feyissa, at 33, has been pressuring SPU to help clear his name.

We question his tactics. By going after the school, he has succeeded in getting the original Falcon article knocked back a few pages when Google searching his name. But due to the media coverage of his crusade, he now has tons of hits with the paragraph intro, “A decade ago Shakespear Feyissa was arrested on suspicion of attempted sexual assault.”

Read more, after the jump.

* A California trial starting this week marks the first time the obscure Military Extraterritorial Jurisdiction Act is used to prosecute a former soldier for actions taken during combat. Former Marine Sgt. Jose Nazario will be tried as a civilian for voluntary manslaughter in the deaths of four Iraqi prisoners. [ San Francisco Chronicle]

* It’s a bird! It’s a plane! No, it’s a “Super Lawyer.” The New Jersey Supreme Court will decide whether attorneys can reveal their “Super Lawyer” identities. [Minneapolis Star-Tribune]

* Senator Max Baucus acts to make the phrase “The Last Best Place” exempt from trademark protection. Montanans everywhere rejoice? [New York Times]

* Note to teachers: please don’t tie the special ed kids to their chairs. [New York Post via Gothamist]

* The cold-fighting claims of Airborne are a joke, says the Federal Trade Commission. The FTC decision and the settlement of a related class-action lawsuit mean the company will be paying out $30 million to consumers. Echinacea retailers, listen up. [Washington Post]

* ATL idol draws to a close today at noon. Don’t forget to vote! [Above The Law]

* … Speaking of the contest to determine ATL’s new editor-in-chief, Kash appreciates the write-in votes, but… [Moving into the Fourth Estate]

If you’re in New York today (Sunday) and looking for something to do in the afternoon, consider checking out Thurgood. It’s a one-man show about the life of Justice Thurgood Marshall (1908-1993), starring Laurence Fishburne (best known as Morpheus of The Matrix, but with a long list of other film and theater credits).

It’s an entertaining and educational production, and Laurence Fishburne turns in a superb performance. As one friend of ours, an ex-theater major, put it, “Fishburne was able to make the audience forget that this is a one-man show.”

As one might expect from a play based on the life of a heroic historical figure, Thurgood occasionally verges on the pedantic and preachy (“one person can make a difference”; “we know how far we’ve come — but we also know how far we still have to go”). Law nerds might find feel patronized by the more expository parts of the play, like the mini-reviews of Plessy v. Ferguson and Brown v. Board of Education. You can often sense the “message” button being pushed.

But hey, everyone needs a refresher course every now and then. And there are enough interesting bits of biographical trivia — as well as ample entertainment, in the form of humorous anecdotes from Marshall’s life, well-told by Fishburne — to make you forgive the more didactic or heavy-handed elements.

If you’d like to see Thurgood, you need to act fast; it’s closing today. The 3 p.m. matinee is the final performance. You can probably get discounted tickets at the TKTS booth (since Thurgood was there last week, and there were definitely a few empty seats at the performance we attended yesterday).

Additional thoughts — if you’re planning on seeing the play, save these for later, so you can form your own opinions free of taint — after the jump.