ATL Idol, Contests, Federal Judges, Judicial Divas, Reader Polls

America's Worst Legal Boss Strikes Back

By  
on

[Ed. note: This post is by FROLIC & DETOUR, one of the finalists in ATL Idol, the “reality blogging” competition that will determine ATL’s next editor. It is marked with Frolic & Detour’s avatar (at right).]
Many thanks to those who wrote in about their creepy, sadistic, and otherwise entertaining legal bosses.
Our first nominee, Judge Suzanne B. Conlon, earned her place in bossal history by firing a clerk for complying with an evacuation order on Sep. 11, 2001.
Read about her competition, courtesy of some long-suffering ATL readers, after the jump.


1. Gee, your hair smells terrific…

During my first year at the firm, my boss would routinely stop me in the hallway and touch my hair, sometimes leaning over to smell my hair, telling me that I used “wonderful-smelling shampoo.” While I was working late one night, he came in and stood behind my chair, rubbing my shoulders and leaned down to put his face on my head, inhaling deeply. When I jerked away, he got turned on his heels and walked away, laughing to himself. Other female associates and paralegals also got this same unwanted attention, but I seemed to be the main target. When I tried to fight back and started defending myself against the rampant abuse at the firm, my reviews and reputation there plummeted. Shortly before I left, two young attractive female associates were hired, both of whom had long, lustrous hair. Sadly, the hair smelling tradition continues.

2. Win One for the Gipper

As a first year associate in D.C. about 20 years ago, I put in about 2400 hours total, 2200 billable. During my second year, our office manager (Barbie doll wife of senior partner) decided that I should help coach their son’s football team out in McLean. So, three days a week, I would work 7 am to 3 pm, drive out to McLean and coach for 2 hours, drive back into Georgetown and then work until 9 pm. At the end of the year, my performance review indicated that my billables had dropped to ONLY 2050 hours. As punishment, the firm took away my parking space. I quit 3 months later.

3. Scarecrow

“Scarecrow” in the regulatory practice in [A-List firm] DC office is the worst legal boss ever. He has run more people out the door since joining the firm a few years ago than anyone in the firm over a much longer period. As the last straw, Scarecrow berating an underling caused him to collapse in the hallway outside of his office and have a nervous breakdown on the floor. And, when the firm called paramedics, the subordinate screamed that he could not go to the hospital because he had too much work to do for Scarecrow.

Sponsored

4. ATL Readers

And our final nominee: Above the Law readers! Has any lawyer ever tried to please a tougher taskmaster? If so, we have yet to hear about it.

Here’s the poll:

Sponsored

Topics