Lawsuit of the Day: Steak au Pubic Hair
[Ed. note: This post is by ALEX, one of the finalists in ATL Idol, the “reality blogging” competition that will determine ATL’s next editor. It is marked with Alex’s avatar (at right).]
Kevin and Marcia Hansen recently filed suit against the Texas Roadhouse restaurant chain after Kevin found a big-ole clump of pubic hair hidden in his ribeye. Yes, pubic hair.
The lawsuit came after the restaurant’s now infamous improvisational cook, Ryan Kropp (pictured below), pleaded guilty to a felony charge of placing foreign objects in edibles on June 19th.
According to the complaint, the Hansens were living the American Dream, eating steak at one of the chain’s Wisconsin locations last February. Kevin Hansen’s steak was a little overcooked, though.
When restaurant service manager Michael Liberatore stopped by the table, Hansen told him the steak was cooked medium, not medium rare.Hansen declined an offer of a new steak, but Liberatore persisted and offered a new steak he could take home, the complaint said.
Encountering a teachable moment, the manager then took the half-eaten, overcooked steak and showed it to Kropp and another cook. Kropp, apparently inspired by the demonstration, endeavored to make Hansen’s next steak real’ special.
Kropp later told police he was angry because he believed Hansen was “just trying to get free stuff,” so he cut a slit in the center of the steak and inserted his facial hairs, according to the criminal complaint.But Ryan Hetzel, the Hansens’ attorney, said Friday that another cook told police that Kropp was cleanshaven that day and said, “These are my pubes” before putting the hair into the steak.
Hansen discovered the pubic hair while he was choking down the big piece of meat on the following day. The complaint is silent on whether the steak was medium-rare.
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First-YES IF FEELS SO GOOD!
This is why I only have prepubescent children cooking my food.
this post is awful.
Great. Just Great!!!
You can cross off one of the 11 secret herbs and spices.
This is one of the best contestant posts yet... a bit trivial in the subject matter, a tiny bit lengthy, but the writing is crisp, appropriately linked and quoted, and just humorous enough to be entertaining. A-
Hey Alex, good job. When I first read this, I didn't realize that it was a contestant post - I thought it was by Lat or Kash. Its well-written and concise, and uses quotes well.
I think this is your best post to date.
First post yet that made me react to the subject matter and not the writing.
Jeetje that's a sick story. Oh gosh.
Good post, funny, crisp.
At least no one can say he is an AA hire....
...although Alex's "avatar" probably needs updating. A mug shot of the pube-monster? It's almost as creepy as Marin's MJ.
Either ATL forgot to include the avatar, or Alex is one ugly dude. No, I'm pretty sure that is a photo of the cook who plead guilty to using special ingredients.
Ummm boooring
gross and not very entertaining
He "discovered the pubic hair while he was choking down the big piece of meat . . . . "
Nice wordplay - almost Lat-ian in its imagery.
I had been thinking that Alex might be a little too earnest to be ATL EIC, but this post makes me reconsider.
Clearly this guy is a fan of the movie "Waiting"
Hopefully, the steak in question was seasoned a bit better than this bland post
I love the sexual innuendo to end the post, fantastic!
I wanna hear BigLaw news... I know its summer, but there must be something going on
17-- For real? I thought it was super lame. Especially when you consider all the other lame stuff Alex has written in this competition
"These are my pubes"--admission by a party opponent.
*Please don't spit in my eggs*
*Please don't spit in my eggs*
*Please don't spit in my eggs*
THANK YOU FOR THE EGGS!!
Very bland.
(i) This post made me think Lat or Kash wrote it.
(ii) But COME ON. I was eating my breakfast when I saw this. You should give a girl some warning when you're going to make her want to vomit!
And all these years I stayed clear of Texas roadhouse because I thought pubes was one of the included ingredients in their meals. I guess this is good news in the sense that I now know they usually DON'T use pubes in their food. awesome.
Alex steps his game up in a big way
Finally, a topic Alex could sink his teeth into.
Solid post Alex. It's between you and Sophist in my book.
18-- I cannot agree more... that is the worst part of this contest-- that and Lat is dragging it on for three weeks
Blatant attempt to leverage off Exley's award-winning centaur pubes reference.
The best post so far. Alex is making a comeback.
30-- How can you make a comeback when you are in fourth? Alex is the worst
HofstraMagna is better.
Well done Alex. This is your best yet.
33-- you are right, this is Alex's best effort, but I wouldn't take that as a good sign for his longevity in this competition, not after the turds he has been turning in.
Who among us hasn't spiked a nemesis' food with public hair?
#23 - if the thought of pubic hair in your mouth makes you want to vomit, you're not going to have much of a social life.
guys in my high school, uh maybe never mind
Great post. Succinct and entertaining!
23 - atl is made for da boyz
Absolutely disgusting. Another reason why I don't take the meat ;)
Good job Alex. Very Lat-esc. I will miss David, though. He is my hero (and I fear I am a little obsessed, but only in a healthy way, with him, after reading his wiki page only, oh 19 times)
One big drawback: it's not "well-linked": Lat often has funny or related links for random lines here and there. There are several links in this post, but ALL of them go to the SAME PLACE: the story.
Very good post. Alex and Sophist stand far above the rest of the "competition."
This is why you need to be selective of which restaurants at which you complain about the food. This is the Texas Roadhouse, not Charlie Trotter's. The Texas Roadhouse doesn't have any all-star chefs and if your medium-rare ribeye is actually medium consider yourself lucky that your $8 steak was even that close. If you want a perfect steak buck up and go to a real steak joint.
Nice, I give it a A-. Made me laugh, very concise and to the point. Minor deduction for not being law related (or rather the law relation part is over-shadowed by the grossness of the story).
anyone else wondering why 11:27(1) is still eating breakfast?
45, I briefed wondered that but then quickly surmised that perhaps she's on the West Coast, where it was only 8:27.
People in California are always thinking its 3 hours earlier than it really is....
46 and 47:
you two are sharp.
-45
PS: How bad would it suck for Monday Night Football to start at 6:00?
In the movie Road Trip, the cook takes the pancakes that were sent back and sticks them in his underwear and in the crack of his ass and then starts doing lunges. It was pretty funny. Funnier than this post, at least.
Completely agree with #43. Never complain, send anything back, or do anything other than smile and be nice at any place other than the finest restaurants. I think this kind of stuff happens a lot more than people realize. Just usually not this blatant. If you don't like your food, just don't go back. And who takes a steak home and eats it the next day?? That sounds disgusting by itself. I would only bring steak home for the dogs.
Good post. I liked the closing zinger at the end about no word on whether the second steak was medium rare.
Finally, the most troubling unanswered question about this whole story is how did this guy suddenly come up with a handful of his own pubic hair? Was he carrying it around waiting for the right moment?
50 - no he just used a meat scissors (used to cut meat, chicken etc) so that everyone got a taste
This is a good post. The writing style and structure are good, and the story is gross but entertaining. You can also tell its good b/c some comments actually discuss the story in the post, instead of just grilling Alex.
B+
Interesting case. On the one hand, if it is true that there were similar complaints against this person before and the restaurant kept him on, then they deserve to be sued. On the other hand, the injuries listed in the complaint are rediculously over the top(though I am not a litigator so maybe this is how things are done). Extensive medical treatment? Severe and permanent pain, suffering, inconvenience and disability and severe and permanent mental anguish and suffering, severe and permanent embarrassment and emotional distress? Lost wages from missing work.? "Loss of love and affection companionship and society” for the wife? Come on.
I think they are called TIme Zones, 45.
First ATL-Idol post to make me laugh out loud while reading. Great last line.
thanks for clearing that up, 54.
- 46 & 47
Great post! I am still laughing so hard...
Wouldn't be funny if it happened to me though. But picturing this patron choking on the guy's pubes is pretty comical
48, not nearly as bad as watching from the UK, where Monday Night Football kicks off at 1 am on Tuesday.
Gross. There has to be better subject matter. But decent handling of the post.
Finally! This post shows some promise.
Your story is a little off. He didn't cut a slit in the steak and the manager never 'showed' the cooks how to cook a steak.