First to say First, but was actually going to say "quiet" as well...damn you first poster!

As a former Michigander, I'd like to say that Kwame's removal would be the first good thing that Granholm has done for the state.

nice post. good work.

What does "if Utah could beat Michigan" mean? Are we talking about a measure of weirdness?

Michigan is in the eastern time zone.

And he has weird ears. Don't ever trust a man with weird ears.

And he has weird ears. Don't ever trust a man with weird ears.

Thanks 6. I did not know that.

Wow, hate Detroit much?

Why take so many unnecessary pot-shots at Detroit? Hasn't the city suffered enough?

I have never lived in Detroit, nor ever will, but this was bush league, Elie. ATL should be better than this.

That intro paragraph is total crap, Elie. I read it in RSS without your name attached and *instantly* new that it must have been written by the new guy.

Gimme the substance first and *then* fold-in the funny.

wow. what's with the transparent hatred of Detroit? I'd be first to admit that the city has many, many problems, but this is actually kind of offensive, and I don't even live there.

Suggested location for next ATL editors meeting: 8 Mile. Maybe you can bring copies of your article and see what the locals think.

Stop black-on-black violence now!

That's right. Let's go back to the good old days. Black on white violence is the way to go.

Great post Elie. Very funny. Especially since I'm from a "dangerous" city that gets a bad rep, just not Detroit.

People, can't you take a joke?

Picking on Detroit is pathetic. It's a major American city that is at rock bottom. Have a little sympathy for the tens of thousands of honest Americans in Detroit who are suffering through the embarrassment of the Kilpatrick fiasco and the shame of unemployment. Detroit will rise again, you prick.

5 - the reference is to this past Saturday's football game between the Universities of Michigan and Utah.

Each line of this post was headed towards Funnyville until it hit a potshot and flipped spectacularly into the ditch of hating on something that doesn't need to be taken down a peg.

Cumbersome, sure, but you get the point.

5 - The Utah beating Michigan statement was a reference to the two respective college football teams that played this past weekend. Michigan lost its opener to a MWC team at home, again, which is slightly better than losing to a I-AA team, Appalachian State, last year.

I was thinking the same thing as 12, Elie. You're straining to be funny and it's not working.

Elie, sweetheart, you're funny, and I like the wry humor, but often you are a bit over the top. Let me give you a chick rule that might help you out. When wearing multiple accessories, take off one item before you walk out the door to make sure you aren't over-accessorized. When posting, take out one thematic (though usually repetitive) insult to make sure you don't go quickly from funny to bitter.

I thought "the good old days" saw lots of white on black violence, not the other way around?

Detroit is poor!! hahaha!! Elie is a fat troll!!! hahaha!!

everyone is a critic. 18, 20, 22 and 23 - where are your blogs so we can take a look at them?

As a native Michigander living elsewehere, I think this article is terrific. For futher comic relief, see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bFunr5TAlMA&feature=related

26- if everyone had their own blog then nobody would comment on other people's blogs.

just poor writing. that's all.

Elie,

Your sentence construction still needs work. I don't have time to go into detail, but there are a few missing commas, redundancy in word usage and iffy relationships between verbs and subjects (largely a result of shoddy punctuation and over-extended sentences).

This is a "B" post.

Also, keep your tenses straight. The 2nd paragraph is a mess.

Layoffs in the Detroit office of Cravath. More to follow later.

Knocking Detroit is pathetic. Way to beat a dead horse. Very poor taste.

LOL, I grew up less than a mile outside Detroit. It's a mega-shithole death trap, and I enjoyed your Detroit bashing.

I feel sorry for the people who live there, but on the other hand, I'm annoyed with them because they contribute to their own demise. I think Detroit high schools have around a 35% graduation rate.

You can't sit around waiting for someone else to save you. You have to do it for yourself. And Detroiters can start by taking education more seriously.

My neighborhood was close to being as shitty as some Detroit neighborhoods, and I managed to pull myself out by doing well in school.

3, fellow Michigander here, and I'm sick of the Granholm bashing. Was she supposed to unilaterally save the failing auto industry? The problem with Michigan is the failing auto industry, you can't put that on her.

Michigan should have tried to attrack new industry long ago. But again, you can't put that on Granholm.

Would you come to such a cold, dismal state full of uneducated blue collar rednecks if you were an employer? I wouldn't. And that's not a problem Granholm could have fixed during her time in office.

Michigan is where it is because of decades of neglect by incompetent business leaders and politicians.

24, the history of racial violence in detroit goes white on black, black on white, black on black.

But even today if you're a white kid going to school in Detroit, you face a high risk of getting your ass kicked frequently for being the white devil.

Elie, don't listen to them. I enjoyed the Detroit bashing.

Post something else on Palin. Don't fight the rabidity.

I agree with 3, as a Michigander this is the best thing Granholm has done for the state.

In response to the increasing unemployment she has increased the minimum wage, increased regulation and skyrocketed taxes on businesses.

To be fair unemployment is starting to slow down, but that is largely because people are moving out of the state.

35, if you have any ideas of how Michigan could possibly increase unemployment, send them to Lansing and they will probably become law by January.

39's a mental retard

"Sadly, I don't own a Kevlar vest" is the best opening line in all of blogistory.

But it's not stab-proof, therefore somewhat useless.

34 = Tired Republican rhetoric

Obama: For over two decades, he's subscribed to that old, discredited Republican philosophy - give more and more to those with the most and hope that prosperity trickles down to everyone else. In Washington, they call this the Ownership Society, but what it really means is - you're on your own. Out of work? Tough luck. No health care? The market will fix it. Born into poverty? Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps - even if you don't have boots. You're on your own.

Well, let's not forget that the residents of the fine city of Detroit actually *elected* this gangster and he continues to enjoy widespread support from his constituency (in other words, not the honkeys in Farmington, Livonia, Troy, et.al).

I'm a native Detroiter, but haven't lived there in along while. I'd like to see the city become what it once was, but that won't happen when people like this joker get into office on a platform of "make whitey pay" and then turn City Hall into their own personal club with bottle service.

Also, anyone posting from Chicago: glass houses, ya'll.

43 this is 34, and i'm not a republican, i'm an independent.

If you think taking personal responsibility doesn't work, why don't we revisit how well the "great society" and "war on poverty" worked?

And like I said, I grew up poor as shit, and I pulled myself out of it. Often, poor people are their own worst enemies and raising everyone else's taxes to give them handouts doesn't solve the problem.

I watched my classmates slack off until they ended up like their parents while I worked my way out. It annoys me to no end that now that I'm doing well, these douchebags are crying to me for handouts they somehow feel entitled to.

Poor in America =/= Poor

44 - you hit the nail on the head.

Except it's "y'all"

>Kilpatrick had an affair with his chief-of-staff, lied about it under oath, and allegedly paid off a police officer to keep it quiet. <
Actually, it is more like: while the mayor was having an affair with his chief of staff, he hosted a party at his house featuring one or more strippers. His wife came home during the party and (allegedly) beat up one of the strippers. The police officers investigating the subsequent murder of the stripper was fired, and in the lawsuit he brought against the City, the mayor and chief of staff both lied under oath about their affair and the fact that they fired the officers. Then the mayor deceived the city council into approving a post-verdict settlement of the suit (for more than the verdict amount) just hours after receiving a motion containing excerpts from text messages that revealed that the mayor and chief of staff's lies under oath.

49, don't forget the alleged assault on a cop (or 2)

how daring/bold/original of you to suggest that going to detroit might get you shot. very refreshing...hopefully indicative of the type of profound insight i will come to expect when i never visit your site again.

i agree with the above posters.

i always find that the douches who rag on detroit as a "place to wear a kevlar vest" are the same people that tell you to "watch your ass" in san francisco because of the gay population. it's funny the first time, but loses it's humor rather quickly.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nga2_XK3kmE

The future ghost of Gil Scott-Heron approves of this message.

this is just racism, forcing a black man to abide by the white man's laws!

Bring back Billy Merck! We want our shitty posts about mayors who get kicked out of their job to be written by an ATL blogger who got kicked out of his job.