When a law school dean threatens a massive invasion of privacy, something stinks.
The Assistant Dean of Students at University of Minnesota Law School is Erin Keyes. You might remember her for her 3rd place performance in our Law School Dean Hotties Contest.
But having a pretty face doesn’t prevent Keyes from getting dirty when the job requires. Yesterday she sent around a school-wide email:
We have had several recent reports about a strong, offensive odor emanating from a small section of the Law School’s locker room. If you believe you may have left a lunch or other item behind, we ask that you remove it immediately. Starting at 3 PM today, staff from the Law School’s Facilities office will begin opening lockers to find and remove the source of the odor.
We appreciate your cooperation, and in the future, ask all students to ensure that no perishable food items are left in lockers.
We’ll get back to dirty smelly puns in a second.
But UMN Law students should take immediate action. Take your drugs out of your locker NOW. 3:00 p.m. will be upon you soon and if one of you leaves the crystal meth (or whatever they are doing in the upper Midwest these days) in your locker, you will be mocked. You’ll be mocked on ATL, in court, and later when somebody who knows your story buys coffee from you.
End of PSA announcement.
Back to the smell (if there is such a thing) after the jump.
Which UMN student has poisoned the clean lake air? A tipster points out:
[T]he so-called locker room is not a gym locker room; just a bunch of lockers for convenient–if not sweet smelling–storage of books, etc.
I smell a stolen sandwich.
One has to feel sorry for Dean Keyes. When she received her J.D. from UMN Law in 2000, she couldn’t have possibly imagined she’d be dealing with odoriferous student lockers just eight years later. Maybe she should have gone to Lindquist & Vennum instead.