.......crickets......crickets....

Kash, don't forget to remind everyone about the auction tonight at GULC. A group of four can bid for a few hours of your time.

Last year Lat alone went for about $650, so I know you'll net some serious dough.

That is the biggest GULC I have ever seen.

Why would anyone want to spend time with Lat or Mystal? Genuinely curious.

Rocky didn't win the championship in Rocky IV. he fought Ivan Drago and brought down the Soviet Empire and communism singlehandedly. I can handle the grammatcial errors, the equating Down's Syndrome with touretts, but please don't screw up Rocky.

Rocky didn't win the championship in Rocky IV. He fought Ivan Drago and brought down the Soviet Empire and communism singlehandedly. I can handle the grammatcial errors and the equating Down's Syndrome with touretts, but please don't screw up Rocky.

5 - his wit and humor?

The new Blackberry comes out on November 4. Is it an intentional ploy to keep Republicans from voting?

star wars get fucked yesterday...rocky gets fucked today. seriously, kash/mystal, are you guys just completely pop culture retarded?

FIRST to say that ellie the fat man will eat ten cheese steaks to celebrate the new world series champs.

It's "ma'am," jackass.

6/7 -- Rocky WAS the champion at the beginning of Rocky IV. The Drago/Rocky fight at the end was not for the belt because Rocky laid it down after Apollo died. But rest assured, Rocky starts out Rocky IV has the champion, given that he beat the crap out of Clubber Lang at the end of III.

-- Elie

i'm nervous about bidding for kash

nervous t-10 1L

Rocky may not have won the championship in Rocky IV, but there is no doubt that he was a champion in the hearts and minds of all Americans. He was certainly not a champion in Rocky V, he was just a broke ex-boxer. Therefore, I agree that the Phillies would be the first champion to come out of Philadelphia since Rocky IV.

Does anyone really care about Philly? I mean, seriously, its Philly. Almost would rather live in Baltimore. I guess it is better than living in Houston though.

Uh it was McCain, not Biden, who "reassured" someone that Obama was not an Arab.

I bid ***5*** hamburgers (with extra vanilla frosting) for the privilege of tipping over the chair containing the multi-chinned zilch and watching him scramble back into it.

@14 -- I think Kash should be more nervous of you, you disgusting mormon mouth breather.

Confident UVA2L

What kind of sick freak would put an animal through a cage washer and scald it to death?

The only good thing to come out of philly is Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia

The only good thing to come out of philly is Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia

There's an argument that the Phillies are the first Philadelphia based champion since Smarty Jones ... but since the horse couldn't get it done at the Belmont, most people don't think of him as a "champion."

I stand by the Rocky IV commentary.
-- Elie

21 - and Ron Bennington.

Everyone is a winner with cheese steak for breakfast, lunch and dinner!

Hey Elie: Why do you post responses on something so off-topic as Rocky movies, but never post responses to the mountains of legitimate criticisms?

TTTirTTTeenTTTh and TTTwenTTTy-TTThird.

Too bad it took Lidge moving to Philly to get over his 2-year breakdown resulting from the catostrophic Pujols homer in game 5 of the 2005 NLCS. Having sat there in Minute Maid and watched that hit, though, I think I would have broken down for 2 years too. Good for you, Lidge -- we were rooting for you.

-Astros fan

If Philly was a school, it would be GULC. If Philly were a person, it would be a GULCer.

If Texas were a school, it would be a SMU.

"But rest assured, Rocky starts out Rocky IV has the champion, given that he beat the crap out of Clubber Lang at the end of III."

Elie can't even post two sentence comments without making typos.

If Philly was a team, it would be a champion.

And if Philly was a school, it would be U Penn State. Duh.

Philly = fat ugly people = Texas

elie, will you give me a paying 1L summer job? i promise i won't make fun of you!

-nervous T-10 1L

New York = wannabe new Rome.

nervous, *insert generic comment about killing you*.

(sorry for not being more inventive this time around but I haven't had much sleep, so I figured I would just put in an elie*)

*"an elie" is the new term for putting in the minimum amount of effort humanly possible.

Kash is being stalked by nervous guy. Now that is funny.
Also, agree that everyone in Philly and Texas is fat and ugly.

The bartender in It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia is not fat or ugly.

36 - I have an alternate usage:

I ate lots of veggies over the past few days and my elies have been FANTASTIC. Some were even corn-studded. They looked like an ancient war-club !

26 -- I respond to a lot of "substantive criticism" occasionally in the comments and often over email.

If by "legitimate" you mean comments like 5,11,12,17,18, and 30 ... well, I'm not the kind of guy to start a land war in Asia.

-- Elie

Its always fat and ugly in Philly and Texas.

It's always 80 hours a week and a 400 sq foot studio apartment in New York!

Nice, 9.

But seriously, we got little notices in the mail in my neighborhood letting us know that because of some mechanical difficulties with voting machines (i) our polling location was being changed to location ten miles distant through heavy traffic and (ii) we're supposed to show up on Nov 5, not Nov 4.

its always fat and ugly in philly and texas.

GULC the Mormon

It's always fun watching the Knicks lose in New York!

What about the Philadelphia Soul? They are reigning Arena Bowl Champions.

It's always fun watching the Knicks lose in New York!

Former Thelen partner Tom Glascock (aka Glass Cock) has postponed his press conference on proposition 8 to attend the opening of the Elie Mystal Experience on Broadway.

mmmmmm cheese steaks.....If Mystal was a city he would definitely be Philly!

naked3L

Elie's third post illustrates a rather serious problem. He lumped my comment #30 (which pointed out yet another example of his inability to avoid simple typographical errors) in with all of the "Elie is a fat idiot" comments. Elie, your job is Editor in Chief... it is a substantive criticism to point out that you have poor editing skills.

Smelly Elie Mystal is the sum of all of his cheese steak parts.

Guys in my high school used to scald their monkeys all the time. It was no big deal.

A city wins its first championship in over two decades and you douchebags still talk crap. Just beacuse your life sucks does not mean it has to for everyone else.
Congrats Philly!

Ellie might not start a land war in Asia but I bet he would start an eating contest anywhere.

Kindly point out the fat and ugly ones from the following list of Texas women. Thx.

Farah Fawcett
Angie Harmon
Jennifer Garner
Shannon Elizabeth
Eva Longoria
Jacyln Smith (note, 2 of 3 Charlie's Angels)
Jessica Simpson
Jessica Alba
And the following Miss America/Miss USA winners(most of any state):
1971, 75, 77, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 95, 01, 08

Oh come on 30/50, since when is editing a substantive part of being an Editor? What a ridiculous thing to say.

55 - Texas is the second most populous state and they've had 11 Miss America/Miss USA winners. Washington DC is not even a state, with a total population of about 500 thousand people yet they have a total of 4 Miss America/Miss USA winners. So, Texas is so full of fatties, that despite having almost 50 times the population of DC, they don't even have 3 times the number of winners. Your state is fat, just like Elie and Philly.

Kash,

First off, McCain is responsible for the quote in your caption. Second, I hope you're only including that quote in today's Morning Docket to make light of how McCain ridiculously implied that Arabs are incapable of being "decent family men."

Even if McCain wasn't implying that Arabs can't be "decent family men," he is implying that it would be a terrible thing for an Arab-American to run for President. Which is also horrendously racist.

The correct (i.e. not racist) response that McCain should have given: "No m'am, he's not an Arab, but even if he were, it shouldn't make a difference."

-A disgusted Arab-American that is voting Obama

58, get over it.

59 = white racist

-58

The Seattle story is very sad. It sounds like there's plenty of evidence for criminal negligence.

With primates, the legislatures should write-in strict liability for such negligence.

It also makes sense to enable citizen-suit standing for civil harms done to primates' persons.

The Seattle story is very sad. It sounds like there's plenty of evidence for criminal negligence.

With primates, the legislatures should write-in strict liability for such negligence.

It also makes sense to enable citizen-suit standing for civil harms done to primates' persons.

The Seattle story is very sad. It sounds like there's plenty of evidence for criminal negligence.

With primates, the legislatures should write-in strict liability for such negligence.

It also makes sense to enable citizen-suit standing for civil harms done to primates' persons.

The Seattle story is very sad. It sounds like there's plenty of evidence for criminal negligence.

With primates, the legislatures should write-in strict liability for such negligence.

It also makes sense to enable citizen-suit standing for civil harms done to primates' persons.

The Seattle story is very sad. It sounds like there's plenty of evidence for criminal negligence.

With primates, the legislatures should write-in strict liability for such negligence.

It also makes sense to enable citizen-suit standing for civil harms done to primates' persons.

Re: Smarty Jones, Elie, he was a champion. Horse racing championships are determined at the Eclipse Awards, and Smarty won the Eclipse for best three year-old colt.

Other than "Horse of the Year," the 3yo colt Eclipse is usually considered the most prestigious.

Is there some funny subplot in attributing that quote to Biden rather than McCain?

58- If any of these racists "attorneys" would care to join us on the Mall in DC, I'll rumble with them for your side.

Stupid racists, you oughta be disbarred for your comments alone.