Thelen attorneys in NYC and Hartford have a new landing spot. Robinson & Cole picked up 30 displaced Thelen attorneys. According to the Connecticut Law Tribune:

The move adds heft to Robinson & Cole’s construction, real estate, employment and finance practice groups, among others.

“It’s a smart move and good pick-up,” said Connecticut-based law firm consultant Peter Giuliani, but not one that challenges Day Pitney’s status as the leading law firm in the state.

Of course, the Robinson & Cole press release shows no signs of Pitney envy:

The addition of these accomplished attorneys to Robinson & Cole speaks to our strength as a regional firm and will add considerable value to expansion of our New York City office, expansion of our intellectual property practice, and the addition of a prominent construction practice, all goals of the firm’s strategic plan,” said Robinson & Cole’s managing partner, Eric D. Daniels.

Meanwhile, back at the artist formerly known as Thelen, the situation continues to be fluid and confusing:

“At this point it is every group for themselves and not a coordinated top-down plan,” said San Francisco-based Thelen spokesman Kevin Livingston. “Thelen really doesn’t exist anymore. I barely know what is going on in San Francisco.”

Heller Drone comes to the rescue of a disorganized Thelen response, after the jump.

* The Pittsburgh Steelers owners supported Barack Obama. Now they’re trying to sell before the tax rates rise. Steelers pwns Bills. [TaxProf Blog]

* Finally, somebody is offering Nervous T-10 1L a job. [Legal Antics]

* A few tips for older people being pushed around by their law firms. [Law and More]

* I don’t see Prozac Nation author Elizabeth Wurtzel’s name on the NY BOLE website either. That makes me sad. [Gawker]

* Yes. To your friend Lat, you listen. [BBPL via Lexis Hub]

* Justice Antonin Scalia in, The Deer Hunter. [Tex Parte Blog]

* Twitter was invented by manatees who live in a tank full of idea balls. Trust me, I’ve met them. [Res Ipsa Blog via Blawg Review]

One of the stranger events during our time in the U.S. Attorney’s Office in New Jersey was when U.S. Attorney Christopher Christie called an all-hands meeting to announce he was NOT resigning to run for governor. It was a bit odd to announce a non-event, but considering all the water-cooler gossip over the possibility, it made sense to squelch the speculation.

Today Chris Christie convened another all-hands meeting, this time with a different message. From the Newark Star-Ledger:

U.S. Attorney Christopher Christie today resigned his post effective December 1. Christie, 46, a leading contender for the GOP gubernatorial nomination, announced his resignation during a staff meeting at 11 a.m. Christie was not available for comment. His office released a copy of his resignation letter [PDF].

A tipster who attended the meeting said that Christie didn’t mention where he’ll be going. One good guess: Republican holiday parties.

Christie served as U.S. Attorney for almost seven years. In the near term, he will probably be replaced by first assistant Ralph Marra, Jr. (as Acting U.S. Attorney). In terms of who might get the nod in the Obama Administration, some mention the politically well-connected Joe Hayden (husband of Judge Katherine Hayden). Others talk about Essex County Prosecutor Paula Dow, who previously served as an AUSA in Newark, and who would bring diversity to the table (as an African-American woman).

Today seems to be resignation day for New York area U.S. attorneys. Here’s some S.D.N.Y. news, from the WSJ Law Blog:

[P]eople close to the Southern District of New York U.S. attorney’s office tell the Law Blog that USA Michael Garcia will notify prosecutors of his departure during a 5 p.m. meeting.

That’s in five minutes. If anything unexpected comes out of the meeting, we’ll let you know. Unlike Christie’s, Garcia’s next destination is known: Kirkland & Ellis.

U.S. Attorney Christopher Christie steps down [Newark Star-Ledger]
Christopher J. Christie resignation letter (PDF) [Newark Star-Ledger]
Chris Christie coverage [Politicker - NJ.com]
N.Y. federal prosecutor stepping down [AP]
NJ USA Christie Resigns, SDNY’s Garcia to Announce Resignation Today [WSJ Law Blog]

Earlier: Legal Stars of the New Administration

[Ed. note: This post is authored by Evan Jowers and Robert Kinney of Kinney Recruiting — sponsor of the Asia Chronicles, and an ATL advertiser. Kinney has made more placements of U.S. associates and partners in Asia than any other firm in the past two years. You can reach them by email: asia at kinneyrecruiting dot com.]

This is Evan from Hong Kong, writing on the fly for about 20 minutes, at 2am, after a long day of meetings, late client dinner and before an early flight to Jakarta. We have recently been asked, by both firms and candidates, whether the downturn is changing the landscape of cola / housing / expat allowances (“expat allowance”) in Asia and the Middle East. I have been hit with this question several times this week in meetings and Robert heard it as well two weeks ago in his meetings as well. So this post will deal with the basic expat allowance rates for associates without children. A follow-up post on Wednesday will deal with school tuition subsidies / reimbursement, expat allowance increases for children, and tax related windfalls (in some markets), as well as some commentary as to whether the current high expat allowances are sustainable for the long-term in Hong Kong and Tokyo, as firms expand in Asia and considering the reality that profit margins can be lower in Asia per billable hour than in US markets.

Please feel free to follow up in comments with any detailed questions on this subject, as we can only go so far in 1000 words here. Many top US and British firms in Asia and the Middle East have routinely asked us to advise them on various details of their expat allowance policy and we have also helped a number of firms draft come up with set expat allowance packages for the first time (rather than continue on case-by-case basis for each new hire). We have the expat allowance numbers for all firms in Asia (but are not going to give out such specific firm information in a public forum).

Hong Kong: The US associate expat allowance for Hong Kong have remained steady, with most top US firms paying in $60,000 to $80,000 range, for associates without children (only three firms are at $80,000 and most are in the 60s). A firm not paying at minimum a $60,000 allowance is simply not paying a competitive rate in the market. However, there are a handful relatively big name US firms that do not provide any expat allowance, or provide very low allowances, in Hong Kong. Such firms are still able to compete for solid candidates in today’s market because the market is flooded with solid candidates, although we find that most of the firms that pay little or no expat allowance are small and not hiring at this time. The majority of the magic circle firms, as well as a handful of other top British firms, pay expat allowances for their US associates in the competitive $60,000 to $80,000 range, with a couple of notable exceptions.

Other cities after the jump.

Here’s a little shopping rule that I live by. If Jack Thompson starts screaming about a video game destroying the moral fabric of America, I immediately go out and purchase that video game. Back in September, Thompson was disbarred for annoying and harassing the video game industry over “pornographic” titles. It was a great victory for those who enjoy shooting (virtual) Manhattan residents from stolen police helicopters.

But Jack Thompson, who blames the Grand Theft Auto series for teaching children how to kill cops, wants to avail himself of a “reset” button. He sent around the following — I don’t even know what you would call this — angry missive to members of the Florida bar:

I have just been permanently disbarred by The Florida Bar after being a lawyer in continuous good standing for 31 years. No client complained. My sin was accepting Ed Bradley’s personal request to go on CBS’ 60 Minutes to expose the reckless and harmful marketing of adult-rated, violent, and pornographic Grand Theft Auto video games to kids. One of these teens killed three Alabama cops after training to kill them on this “cop-killing” murder simulation game.

Just to be clear, Thompson was not disbarred for going on 60 Minutes with a stick shoved so far up his ass he could choke on it. Instead, Thompson was deemed too contentious to even be a lawyer. The referee’s recommendation for his disbarment said:

Over a very extended period of time involving a number of totally unrelated cases and individuals, [r]espondent has demonstrated a pattern of conduct to strike out harshly, extensively, repeatedly and willfully to simply try to bring as much difficulty, distraction and anguish to those he considers in opposition to his causes.

He does not proceed within the guidelines of appropriate professional behavior, but rather uses other means available to intimidate, harass, or bring public disrepute to those whom he perceives oppose him.

Just because Thompson learned his legal strategies from GTA doesn’t mean that American children are so addled as to think that they can pull off video carjacking skills in real life.

Thompson’s due process argument and his full email after the jump.

The 10th Circuit had an ugly case on its hands last week. While all psychotherapy seems mildly sadistic, this case is especially bad.

Per Wikipedia, psychotherapy is supposed to “increase an individual’s sense of well-being and reduce subjective discomforting experience.” A Kansas couple running a home for the mentally ill had a slightly different approach. It involved a stun gun and mutual shaving of private parts.

From Suits and Sentences:

[T]he Kaufmans forced residents to “perform sexually explicit acts and farm labor in the nude while maintaining that these acts constituted legitimate psychotherapy for the residents’ mental illnesses. Moreover, the Kaufmans billed Medicare and the residents’ families for the therapy.”

Investigators seized videotapes showing the schizophrenic residents masturbating and posing nude at Kaufman’s direction. “Eventually,” the 10th Circuit noted,”the Kaufman House developed rules that required some of the residents to be nude when engaging in certain activities—for example participating in group therapy sessions, eating dinner, and watching television.”

It’s like a twisted version of Green Acres. Psychotherapists Arlan and Linda Kaufman were convicted in November 2006 for “forced labor and holding clients in involuntary servitude.”

They appealed because the judge in the trial ordered them to avoid eye contact with the former clients who testified against them. The Kaufmans claimed this violated their constitutional right to confront their accusers.

The 10th Circuit “acknowledged the Kaufmans had ‘considerable support’ for their argument, but ultimately concluded their substantial rights were not violated.” They’ll be heading to prison for 30 years. On the upside, maybe they’ll discover some new psychotherapy techniques to add to their repertoire.

Don’t look now: Judge orders accused to avert gaze [Suits and Sentences/McClatchy]
Abuse convictions upheld;resentencing ordered [Examiner]

We’ve received about 1,000 responses so far to last Monday’s ATL / Lateral Link survey on bonuses, which is still open here.

On Wednesday, we told you about when bonuses were paid for 2007, and when (and whether) associates expect to receive bonuses in 2008.

Today, we’ll focus on another key component of the bonus equation: your hours.

In the past, we’ve asked you whether work was slowing down, but those surveys didn’t ask you what your billable hours would actually be at the end of the year.

Last week, we decided it was time to ask … and we’re, um, sorry.

Results: How many hours did you (or will you) bill in 2007 (and 2008)?

As you can see, 2007 was a pretty good year for killing time. Roughly 70% of respondents billed at least 2000 hours last year (not counting associates with stub years), with over a third billing at least 2200. And over 11% — almost one in eight associates — were in the 2400+ zone.

This year, the mighty have fallen, and so have their hours. While roughly 56% of associates still expect to hit at least 2000 hours in 2008, the number reaching 2200 is expected to fall from 35% to about 21%.

Meanwhile, the number of associates who won’t even make 1800 hours has roughly doubled, rising from 9.86% to 19.54%. Almost one in twelve associates don’t even expect to make 1600 hours, way up from 3.29% a year ago. (Remember, these numbers exclude stub years.)

See nervous breakdowns by class, by year, and by market, after the jump.

Given all of the terrible layoff news, Cadwalader, Wickersham and Taft has been getting some love from our readers and commenters. Cadwalder’s 96 lawyer bloodbath this summer now looks like what many firms will have to do eventually.

Not so fast my friends.

In September, partner Andrew J. Perel defected to Steptoe & Johnson. At the time, we noted:

[T]here is just no way of knowing right now if the defection of Andrew Perel is an outlier or a precursor. Yet [chairman Chris] White talks about his departed partners in language usually reserved for junior associates.

Well, The Lawyer reports that the Cadwalader partner floodgates could be just about to open:

The partners of Wall Street’s fifth most profitable firm have revolted against their managing partner ­following a disastrous year that has seen their core ­markets collapse.

First on the chopping block could be former Cadwalader chairman Bob Link:

Cadwalader Wickersham & Taft managing partner and former chairman Bob Link will be removed from the management committee in an extraordinary meeting this Wednesday (19 November). He will remain as a partner at the firm.

A Cadwalader partner said: “Bob has to be the fall guy. His strategy failed and he has to go.”

A Cadwalader statement and additional speculation after the jump.

Maybe the disastrous Jason Kidd trade made Mark Cuban think that he needed better information before he pulled the trigger on a big deal.

Cuban was sued by the SEC today for insider trading. Embarrassingly, Cuban allegedly tried to game the market on a crappy stock that nobody’s ever heard of: Mamma.com. The company is now called Copernic, and its stock stinks.

The complaint alleges that Cuban violated an agreement to keep certain information confidential:

Despite agreeing in June 2004 to keep material, non-public information about an impending stock offering by Mamma.com Inc. confidential, Cuban sold his entire stake in the company - 600,000 shares - prior to the public announcement of the offering. By selling when he did, Cuban avoided losses in excess of $750,000.

CNBC is enjoying reminding people that Cuban made his fortune selling his company Broadcast.com to Yahoo just before the dot com bubble burst. But let’s also remember that lots of people have become rich by getting the hell away from Yahoo.

Still, even if true, things are better for Cuban than they could be. At least he’s not being charged criminally (yet).

Statement from Cuban’s attorney, after the jump.

Amidst all the depressing talk of layoffs and cold offers, here’s a little mergers and aquisitions news to brighten your Monday: Even in a bad economy, the wedding machine grinds on. In fact, we’ve noticed a slight uptick in the number of registries at Neiman Marcus. So how bad can things be, really?

Here are this week’s lucky featured couples:

1. Jordan Brudner and Daniel Gaspar

2. Randy Shapiro and Daniel Ripp

3. Rachel Turow and Benjamin Schiffrin

More about these newlyweds, after the jump.

Today, 50,000 Citigroup employees learned that their services would no longer be needed. I spent the weekend at the gun range working on the skills that will matter in the “new economy,” but law firms partners spent the time jockeying for business. Apparently, not everybody has accepted the post-apocalyptic reality staring us all in the face.

But let’s play their game; let’s assume that there will be “money” in the future that can still be traded for goods and services. Which law firms are positioned to pitch in with new Citigroup work?

Because it’s not going to be Wachtell. AmLaw Daily reminds us that Wachtell is representing Wells Fargo in litigation against Citi. And Sullivan & Cromwell is representing the Wachovia side of that Citi-Wachovia-Wells ménage à screwed.

Given today’s news, it’s not surprising that Citi’s board spent most of the weekend trying to pick a top law firm to cover their backside:

Citi’s board is apparently fighting over which Am Law 100 firm free of conflicts it should retain as counsel.

Quoting an anonymous “person close to the situation,” the Times reports that “Citigroup’s board has been bickering over seemingly small issues, including which white-shoe law firm will represent it. …”

The contenders, after the jump.

* SCOTUS will decide if it was constitutional to regulate a movie that negatively portrayed Hillary Clinton by classifying it as a campaign ad. [The LA Times]

* The son of the King of Bahrain is suing Michael Jackson for breach of contract. [The Telegraph]

* Hundreds of race crimes, from physical attacks to minor acts of vandalism, have occurred across the country since the election. [abcnews.com]

* Former president of Taiwan Chen Shui-bian, who is in prison for corruption, began a hunger strike last Wednesday, only hours after his arrest, and has now been rushed to the hospital. [BBC news]

* SCOTUS will hear a case concerning a West Virginia state judge’s decision to preside over a case involving his biggest campaign supporter. The case comes amid ethical questions over the financial backing of judge’s campaigns. [Associated Press]

* Bankers finally catch a break! Britain’s financial regulator may find it impossible to curb bankers big bonuses in January because of employment contracts. [Bloomberg.com]