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Babies in the Corner: Caption Contest Finalists

After two weeks of non-stop layoff and bonus news, it looks like we might finally make it through a whole day without anybody getting fired or jobbed out of their expected year end compensation.

This gives us an opening to bring you the finalists from last week’s caption contest. We’ve read through all 275 comments, disregarded the ad hominem attacks, and brought you the ten best caption ideas. First, here’s the picture again (courtesy of photographer Joshua Landau):

Caption Contest 111808.JPG

And now, the finalists:

A. Typical day for attorneys in the structured finance group.

B. Don’t move! They can’t lay us off if they don’t see us.

C. We’ll now hear oral argument in the case of Length v. Girth.

D. Too tall. Too fat. Go home, you’ll never be cut out for Project Mayhem.

E. So, I take it you asked about your bonus too?

F. It’s amazing what a CWT guy will do for a few bucks these days.

G. In contrast to the waterboarding at Guantanamo, under the Obama administration enemy combatants will be subjected to much milder forms of discipline.

H. Rather than suffer the negative publicity arising from associate layoffs, BigLawFirms now dress underperforming associates in symbolic black, line them up, and shoot them.

I. In bad job market, law grads meditate to seek enlightenment, loan forbearance.

J. umm did the Kool-Aid taste funny to you?

Vote in the poll below. Once again we ask that you not reveal that backstory for this picture, and we demand that you do not out the contest’s (unwilling) participants.

Comments

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1 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:05 PM

LAST!

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2 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:08 PM

all of those suck. I mean bad. i vote not to vote.

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3 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:10 PM

The T3:
B. Don't move! They can't lay us off if they don't see us.
E. So, I take it you asked about your bonus too?
H. Rather than suffer the negative publicity arising from associate layoffs, BigLawFirms now dress underperforming associates in symbolic black, line them up, and shoot them.

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4 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:14 PM

D is a sold Fight Club reference...tops the others, no doubt.

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5 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:16 PM

trig palin could have come up with better captions

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6 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:18 PM

Vote for unlisted option K:

John became suspicious that his associate job was in jeopardy when the firm combined his office with the urinals on the 42nd floor.

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7 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:18 PM

Are you kidding me?? These are the finalists you picked? These are horrible.

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8 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:21 PM

Awful

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9 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:22 PM

Oh shut up, if they suck so much come up with something better you whiney little girls.

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10 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:22 PM

Fucking shameful. These choices make me want to kill stuff.

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11 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:22 PM

yeah this sucks and so does Elie.

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12 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:25 PM

Unfunny picture yields unfunny captions.

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13 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:25 PM

9 = racist midget in the picture

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14 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:27 PM

Elie,

add in comment K. it is better than most of the current ones.

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15 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:27 PM

9 nailed it!

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16 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:30 PM

Another write-in vote for Comment K!!

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17 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:31 PM

Oh shut up, if they suck so much come up with something better you whiney little girls.

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18 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:31 PM

I voted for my CWT NY 05 girlfriend.

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19 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:34 PM

Lots of people did come up with better ones, look at the comments from the original post.

Terrible job in selection of captions...

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20 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:35 PM

One flag!

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21 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:38 PM

better caption than any of the options:

"the last documented sighting of the two men reportedly devoured by disgruntled blogger Elie MysTTTal"

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22 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:40 PM

Lots of people did come up with better ones, look at the comments from the original post.

Terrible job in selection of captions...

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23 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:45 PM

10 - start with yourself.

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24 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:45 PM

i vote for #21

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25 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:46 PM

Write in vote for option K in post #6

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26 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:47 PM

I vote for #10 killing himself blog stylie!!

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27 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:48 PM

Another write in vote for K

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28 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:50 PM

Special K to 1 vote.
African Americans to 3/5.

29 Posted by TTTroll | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:54 PM

I'm somewhat disappointed at the lack of an "In Soviet Russia..." option.

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30 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 4:57 PM

Thank you, 4.

- D

I realize mine was the only non-law related comment, but oh well. I think most of the voters that didn't vote D just didn't get the reference.

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31 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 5:03 PM

30 - everyone got the reference, it just wasn't that clever. please refrain from over-used pop culture references, HTH

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32 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 5:04 PM

Just because it's a reference to Fight Club doesn't make it funny. I got the reference, but I didn't laugh. Of course, none of the rest made me laugh either, so I guess it's as good a basis as any other. But there are certainly plenty of reasons not to vote for D that are not, "you don't get the reference!"

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33 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 5:10 PM

I vote for "I" - the only one that ties in all the elements: bad economy, echoes of Buddhist/Asian influence in photo and law grad angst and crushing debt. "C" is just a penis joke.

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34 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 5:10 PM

6: It wasn't funny enough to be considered the first time, and it wasn't worth the time it takes to read it on the re-post either.

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35 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 5:14 PM

Vote for K

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36 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 5:20 PM

Why do people find it odd that BigLaw lawyers and arrogant law students with no personality don't find the captions funny? It almost would be easier to tell a joke to retarded kids, at least they would laugh because everyone else was.

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37 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 6:13 PM

C with a bullet, baby!

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38 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 7:00 PM

I vote for "I" - the only one that ties in all the elements: bad economy, echoes of Buddhist/Asian influence in photo and law grad angst and crushing debt. "C" is just a penis joke.

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39 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, November 24, 2008 9:13 PM

The best comment was the one about a makeshift western wall and praying to have Elie booted...

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40 Posted by guest | Permalink Tuesday, November 25, 2008 10:31 AM

39 - dude who made the comment nobody else remembers.

41 Posted by David Brent | Permalink Tuesday, November 25, 2008 1:27 PM

None of the above.

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42 Posted by guest | Permalink Wednesday, November 26, 2008 2:44 PM

I submit that option B) should be disqualified.

http://www.someecards.com/upload/workplace/they_cant_lay_us_off.html

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