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Nationwide Layoff Watch: Wolf Block Fires Mo Cheeks 15 Associates and Staff

WolfBlock Wolf Block Schorr Solis Cohen.jpgIf you watched any ESPN this weekend, you might have caught SportsCenter’s ridiculous coverage of Philadelphia 76ers coach Maurice Cheeks getting fired. Cheeks is the fifth NBA coach to get fired before Christmas (which is a record, apparently) and somebody at ESPN decided that it was appropriate to merge the “bloodbath” of NBA coaches into the larger story about nationwide unemployment numbers.

Therefore, I’ve decided to hand over the rest of this post to Stephen A. Smith so everybody can learn the latest about another Philly institution (Wolf Block) with the appropriate level of histrionics.

Holla! I got this from a SOURCE last week that Wolf Block was layin’ down the smack on 15 cats right before your Christmas or your holidays or WHATEVER YOU WANT TO CALL IT. They got the straight heave-ho yo!

My source tells me that the REDUCTIONS were based on the economics of America, not the performance of their ballers.

After the break, management talks straight.

We were able to get a spokesperson from WOLF BLOCK to confirm the news and views:

The numbers you note … are accurate.

That’s what I call the snap, the crackle, and the pop!

The firm didn’t tell us the exact breakdown between associates and staff, but they came correct to the press with the real pain, and that’s GOTTA HELP.

We know that the Wolf has been carefully managing its bottom line for some time. Back in August, they delayed the start date of first-year associates. Rolling back on 15 now seems to fit in with that earlier news.

In this ENVIRONMENT and ECONOMY, nobody is safe. But we got nothin’ but love for the 15 laid off from Wolf Block. At least the firm did the right thing by being UPFRONT with the layoffs. We’ll report more news on the Philly market AS WE GET IT.

… Thanks Stephen A. Good luck former Wolf Block associates and staff.

Earlier: Nationwide Start Date Watch: WolfBlock
Prior ATL coverage of layoffs.

Comments

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1 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:48 AM

FIRST!

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2 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:49 AM

Wow, this is lame.

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3 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:49 AM

chinsky

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4 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:51 AM

That is hilarious. Stephen A. Smith is a clown.

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5 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:51 AM

Wolf Block to Wolf BLITZER

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6 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:52 AM

elie = pathetic

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7 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:52 AM

Ellie. Real black men dont watch ESPN.

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8 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:53 AM

That's not how Stephen A. talks. Not even close. "Holla"? "Heave-ho yo"? Really? Really? You just typed that on your computer and posted it? Really?

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9 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:53 AM

I seriously can't go on with this crap.

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10 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:53 AM

lol

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11 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:55 AM

Ellie - awesome job making a joke out of people losing their job right before the Holidays - you sir truely are an A$$HOLE

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12 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:55 AM

where is the Count today?

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13 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:56 AM

Well played big guy.

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14 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:56 AM

10 - it's not that far off. Stephen A. always says corny stuff like that.

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15 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:56 AM

This has to be the worst post in the history of ATL.

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16 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:56 AM

EVERYTHING THAT I SAY IS IMPORTANT

-SAS

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17 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:57 AM

This has to be the worst post in the history of ATL.

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18 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:57 AM

this is some of Elie's best work. Stephen A Smith is pretty obnoxious and talks just like that.

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19 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 11:58 AM

as annoying as ellie is. that is exactly how stephen a smith talks HALLA AT YA BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOY

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20 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:01 PM

Best work? Really? Nothing like making light of the fact that more people just got laid off. Very disrespectful, regardless of however good the imitation of SAS might be.

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21 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:05 PM

I haven't visited ATL in over 2 weeks. This post reaffirms my decision to seek legal news elsewhere.

Horrible, horrible, horrible.

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22 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:07 PM

lulz!

well done Mystal!

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23 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:07 PM

Elie ate too many SkaddenDC cookies. He typed this crap on a sugar high.

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24 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:07 PM

Brilliant. The people complaining about this post are lame.

25 Posted by Douche Patrol | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:08 PM

7 YOU are a douche!

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26 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:08 PM

Please do a poll on whether Chinese LLMs should be given US law licenses after only one year of school. They're flooding our borders like rats to high ground.

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27 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:09 PM

Yeah, this is in poor taste. It's one thing to report on how bad the economy is getting, but let's not start turning to this as a source for entertainment. Btw, has the guy who suggested all laid off attorneys should commit suicide been hit by a bus yet?

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28 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:15 PM

Rather than rolling out (yet another) story on lay offs, how about a story on those firms that have publicly announced a no lay off's policy (eg Milbanks, L&W? and Jones Day)? Give these firms some credit (where it surely is due) and give all the Nervous 1L's of this world some guidance as to where the real solid firms are for employment prospects?

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29 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:16 PM

Steven A, what do you make of the fired associates?

WolfBlock are worse than the MINNESOTA TIMBERWOLVES. They stink. They're garbage. They were going nowhere. They needed to make a move and quickly. They need to let those bums go if they're going to move from low tier law firm to a CHAMPIONSHIP contender.

As for the associates being fired before Christmas? So what? One of the associates was less productive than KWA-MAY BROWN. KWA-MAY BROWN! WolfBlock should be celebrating. Throw a parade right now if you want...whether you win a championship or not. You just cut dead weight and saved some money. As far as I'm concerned its a wonderful Christmas

Now if you excuse me, I gotta go eat some cheese doos..

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30 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:16 PM

ATL is taking a long, slow mustache ride into the toilet, IMO.

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31 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:16 PM

Ok, it is kind of silly (and maybe even a little bit lame), but also really hilarious and a dead on Stephen A. Smith.

Well done Ellie, well done.

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32 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:17 PM

and now for your Black -U-Weather forecast.....

"its gunna rain lawyers!!!"

Thank you, Ollie.

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33 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:18 PM

Whatever happened to nervous T-10 or whatever that deebs name was.? Did someone finally make good on their threat and actually kill him?

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34 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:19 PM

Steven A, what do you make of the fired associates?

WolfBlock are worse than the MINNESOTA TIMBERWOLVES. They stink. They're garbage. They were going nowhere. They needed to make a move and quickly. They need to let those bums go if they're going to move from low tier law firm to a CHAMPIONSHIP contender.

As for the associates being fired before Christmas? So what? One of the associates was less productive than KWA-MAY BROWN. KWA-MAY BROWN! WolfBlock should be celebrating. Throw a parade right now if you want...whether you win a championship or not. You just cut dead weight and saved some money. As far as I'm concerned its a wonderful Christmas

Now if you excuse me, I gotta go eat some cheese doos..

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35 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:21 PM

Good stuff... posts like this let us pick out the soulless, humorless, DB commentators who troll this site.

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36 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:21 PM

Elie to worst Stephen A. impression in history!

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37 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:21 PM

WolfBlock is now known SheepBlock and Mystal is nailing that woolly firm with the same tenacity it applies to his hourly snacking regimen.

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38 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:22 PM

You mislabeled your Terry Tate impression. At least put "RRRRRRASHA NESTEROVIC!!!!!" in there.

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39 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:23 PM

Is it true Drinker Biddle laid off 20 people last week?

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40 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:24 PM

Is it true Drinker Biddle laid off 20 people last week?

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41 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:24 PM

33 -- Yes. His mother killed him due to the untold amounts of shame and embarrassment he brought down upon his family.

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42 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:26 PM

Is it true Drinker Biddle laid off 20 people last week?

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43 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:26 PM

Sidley Chicago, New York to lay off after the holidays. You heard it here first.

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44 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:27 PM

Is it true Drinker Biddle laid off 20 people last week?

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45 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:29 PM

I AM STEPHEN A. SMITH, AND THESE CHEEZ DOODLES ARE DELICIOUS.

I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW GOOD THEY ARE...DAMN!

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46 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:29 PM

MO CHEEKS
MO PROBLEMS, FOOL.

ITS GUNNA RAIN!!!

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47 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:35 PM

If a white guy wrote this claiming to be Stephen A. Smith, the post would be flagged for racism, and the writer would be dragged down the golden streets of P.C.-ville for being insensitive. But, hey, since Elie is (might be) black, its ok to portray Stephen A. Smith like a caveman...

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48 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:36 PM

47- Does the mustache tickle?

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49 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:37 PM

28,

If you did a search, you would see that those stories have already been done.

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50 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:37 PM

47- Is a crackpipe...

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51 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:38 PM

47- Is a crackpipe...

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52 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:38 PM

47- Is a crackpipe...

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53 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:39 PM

I really liked this post by Elie. That's right, I said it. Great work fat boooooy.

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54 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:39 PM

44 = racist
48 = gay cowboy from the Village People

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55 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:40 PM

How much for my sheep to ride your mustache?

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56 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:42 PM

44 -

No.

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57 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:44 PM

I hate ROD PAMPERS.

Sam Donaldson's Eyebrow

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58 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:47 PM

FIRST to point out that while Mo Cheeks deserved to be fired, Wolf's associates didn't. Hopefully the 76ers can get rollin now!

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59 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:49 PM

Whether you like this post depends on two factors:
(1) How much you hate Ellie; and (2) How much you hate Stephen A. Smith. Let's make a chart:
_
_______________F'ing Hate SAS__|_SAS? Meh.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
F'ing Hate Ellie__| Ellie sucks, but__|_God, I fucking
______________| at least he's____|_hate this post.
______________| mocking SAS___|_Fuck you Ellie.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ellie? Meh._____| Fucking great___|_ATL fucking
______________| post. Fuck you__|_sucks lately.
______________| SAS.__________|____________
------------------------------------------------------------------------

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60 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:49 PM

Mo Cheeks Mo Problems, fool!!

ITS GUNNA STAIN!!!!

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61 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:50 PM

MysTTTal- you were improving but this is epic fail.

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62 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:51 PM

59 = Nazi GULC Trig

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63 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:54 PM

Worst post in the history of ATL

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64 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 12:59 PM

44 - Yes it's true about DBR - on Friday afternoon. No stealth - they came around to every office - told everyone it was economy based.

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65 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:00 PM

Wow, incredibly lame. Had the potential to be great, ok, maybe just sub-par, but whatever standard of measure you use, LAME. FIX IT!

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66 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:01 PM

Elie = terrible SAS impersonation

29 = Dead-on SAS impersonation

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67 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:01 PM

26, What's your problem with Chinese LLMs? I take it you're fine with LLMs from every other country on Earth sitting for the bar after a one year course.

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68 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:02 PM

I would rather nail a sheep than a WolfBlock female associate.

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69 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:06 PM

Is SAS the guy who does Chocolate News on Comedy Central and if so, does that show make Ellie hungry?

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70 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:09 PM

64 -

I call BS.

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71 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:11 PM

70 --

I call DBS

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72 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:14 PM

I heard they don't have guys named Bait and Cock as name partners, they could be Wolf Bait Cock Block.

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73 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:18 PM

DBS?

There is no news of anything in the Legal?

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74 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:20 PM

Do any female associates have an opinion on this matter?

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75 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:26 PM

8: Seth and Amy called. They want their bit back.

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76 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:31 PM

I hate ROD PAMPERS

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77 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:34 PM

Elie,

Please post only in English and not in ghetto-speak. This post was disgusting. You are supposedly an attorney, so please write like one.

Best Regards

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78 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:40 PM

77

Moron. Get a sense of humor, you'll need it when you get layed off your high horse.

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79 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:40 PM

77 -- You Suck worse than Texas Big AIDS

Best Regards,

Everyone Else.

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80 Posted by Unemployed Lawyer | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:54 PM

First you had Jew camp (see recent Howrey post) and now Chinese LLMs are "rats" (26).

You're still obsessed with sheep and mustache rides, which leads me to believe that you all have to clean some pretty awful stuff to wipe out out of your mouthsevery now and then. Maybe you post it here because you have no place else to put it?

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81 Posted by Unemployed Lawyer | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 1:59 PM

First you had Jew camp (see recent Howrey post) and now Chinese LLMs are "rats" (26).

You're still obsessed with sheep and mustache rides, which leads me to believe that you all have some pretty awful stuff to wipe out out of your mouthsevery now and then. Maybe you post it here because you have no place else to put it?

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82 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 2:00 PM

Sheep do not have mustaches.

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83 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 2:01 PM

This post is pretty heartless, considering fifteen people just got fired less than ten weeks before Christmas.

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84 Posted by Unemployed Lawyer | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 2:14 PM

Thank you 83. Just the point I would like to make. I was only trying to do it in language I thought these folks would understand.

You always have to get their attention first.

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85 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 2:15 PM

Haha this is great.

Most ATL douchebags don't like it.

All the normal people that watch ESPN and HATE this guy love it.

Thanks elie.

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86 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 2:23 PM

70 - call it BS all you want - it still happened. Philly, Princeton and Chicago offices were hit, mostly in corporate. I don't think they were calling the Legal to advertise it.

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87 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 2:27 PM

86 -

You are right. Just heard the news locally. Bad news all around. Sad.

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88 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 2:36 PM

Biglaw commentary without the quasi-racist sophomoric humor at http://www.lawshucks.com

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89 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 2:40 PM

"Quasi-" racist? Do you hang out at KKK or Fed Soc meetings?

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90 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 3:39 PM

sounds like alot of you are short on billables and really don't understand what is happening to the legal profession.

http://endofesq.com/?p=690

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91 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 3:47 PM

remember when ATL use to be cool... then Lat stopped writing the posts. (I can't believe I'm wishing for the days of Lat.)

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92 Posted by Unemployed Lawyer | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 4:28 PM

I don't see anything "quasi" about it. I'll also add misogynistic, just so we have have something else to talk about. And to be sure that we're done with this topic: I know that sheep do not have mustaches--I thought that you did.

Our profession is changing all around us. If someone asked me today whether to go to law school, I would reply with a resounding "No!" I'd do it because the future is so uncertain; not because I dislike the practice of law or the profession or the business in general. I actually love practicing law.

I think we're in such a time of change that nobody knows what the outcome will be, not even the corner office guys themselves. But I do think that some sort of thoughtful cooperative effort among associates and, possibly, staff, could influence the future for the better. Use your time and your opportunities to speak freely to the world on this board to try to build something that might change the legal world. Right now, all you do is create fodder for more bad lawyer jokes.

I sent a letter to Lat and Elie, but they neither posted it nor acknowledged it. I understand that it's not the type of thing that really has appeal on this site, but if you want to take a look: www.unemployedlawyers.com.

You'll be hearing from me.

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93 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 5:15 PM

92: You have to be the most anti-intellectual lawyer ever. On your shitty website--which is a thinly veiled ploy to drum up your business--you reference "For Whom the Bell Tolls" as a movie. A MOVIE! There's this guy, John Donne, 17th century English poet. Maybe you heard of him in high school. That's his line dumbass, not some fucking movie from the forties. If you, clod, should be washed away by the sea, the world would be the more.

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94 Posted by Unemployed Lawyer | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 7:38 PM

93:

Ah, ad hominem insults! The perfect way to argue your case. Don't bother about Rule 11. Just imagine the facts and spew your imaginings as its pleases you. More and more the kind of behavior that causes me concern.

First, I am most certainly not "anti-intellectual". To be anti-anything is to be opposed to that thing. I am hardly opposed to intellectualism or the intellectual process. In fact that is exactly what I am challenging you to engage in, for your own good and the good of the other members of your once honorable profession.

Second, even if by "anti-intellectual" you mean that I am not well read (which is certainly not the same thing at all), I most respectfully beg to disagree. I am very familiar with John Donne's writings and enjoy them very much. Far more recently than in high school. I am also familiar with the works of William Shakespeare, Walt Whitman, Shelby Foote, Seamus Heaney, Tom Stoppard, Neil Gaiman, J.K. Rowling, Edgar Allen Poe, Laura Lippman, and too many others to name. SO I must disappoint you there as well.

But to return to Mr. Donne. On my site I am not playing word games with poetry quotes; I am playing word games with movie titles, so quoting John Donne wouldn't have done me much good. Nor would it have done me any good to reference the glorious Ernest Hemingway novel on which the movie whose mention so offended you, was based. You see, you have to know the rules to play the game properly.

Third, my "shitty" website, as you so elegantly describe it, is not a ploy, thinly-veiled or not, for anything, especially to drum up business. The name "Unemployed Lawyers.com" and the fact that I mentionI am unemployed several times through out the site, might have given you some clue that I am, in fact, unemployed. I don't have any business. I think I may hire you as my new research assistant; you are so sharp at making deductions.

I do not run my website to make money. I actually pay for it out of my own pocket, so I lose money on it every month. I run it so that people will have somewhere to go for help. I run it because I think it truly is possible that we could all help each other and that would make me happy.

Just remember, avid fan of the poet John Donne: "No man is an island".

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95 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 7:40 PM

94: Mustache Ride. Now.

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96 Posted by Unemployed Lawyer | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 8:03 PM

95: Find a sheep.

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97 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 9:44 PM

PaTTTheTTTic.

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98 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 10:23 PM

Elie,

I lament that you've ruined this once proud board, but this was an entertaining post. Tomorrow you should try not to suck again. Thanks.

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99 Posted by guest | Permalink Monday, December 15, 2008 10:58 PM

What is "Wolf Block"?

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