The Depression Is So Freaking Depressing (Part I)
So…. Here’s The Thing….
It’s kind of like what Collective Soul said a decade ago, when things were just fantastic:
Are these times contagious?
I’m never been this bored before.
Is this the prize I’ve waited for?
These days, it seems like all my friends are depressed on account of the Depression. (Or the “recession,” for those ostriches who choose to bury their heads in the sand.) It certainly doesn’t help that CNN keeps slapping Obama into FDR’s car or that every reporter declares 600,000 jobs were lost today or the “Dow hasn’t dipped this low since 1929.” Good lord. No wonder no one is spending. I’ve stopped reading the papers. It’s all just widespread panic. Pretty soon they’ll be bringing polio back, too.
And the law firms. Wow. Who ever would have thought those blue-blooded Ivy Leaguers who were doing filings and writing law review articles about all those “complex financial instruments” would now be unemployed? And each day there are more and more layoffs. Where are the acquisitions? And where are freaking derivatives? I mean you always need lawyers, right? And what: associates doing paralegal work? They don’t know how to shepardize, much less tab and hole-punch briefing books. Geez.
The Depression takes its toll, after the jump.
As a result of the Depression, even the most spoiled of my spoiled brat friends are eating out less, drinking at home more (drinking alone has always been in; many of us prefer it), and even buying fewer clothes. Except, of course, my friend George, a government worker who’s still buying $300 jeans and who just purchased a BMW. But I suppose the government — the last bubble left in America - is a good place to be right now. And as a virtual communist, George always has believed there should be more government, not less. He’s hoping Obama brings back the old school Civilian Conservation Corps so he can work outside tending to the national parks. An added bonus: during his lunch hour, he can get a workout in: do push-ups and sit-ups in the grassy knoll. He’s all about the new New Deal. In fact, he’s so into Obama and this new administration that he wants me to “cohost” an inaugural brunch with him. As if. I cater not cook. I’m not cooking eggs for anyone — and certainly not because some man (black or white) got elected president.
As far as the Depression is concerned, I really have no advice to offer my friends. But I must say I’m actually kind of glad the chirpy people are starting to see the dark side. I couldn’t bear another year of watching them hand-hold, convertible-drive, and beach-home purchase.
I’ve always been the eternal pessimist, but lately I find that I’m actually more optimistic than most about where we are. I believe in the power of government (at times) to do good things and actually help people. I also believe that the haves will always take care of the have-nots (that’s what my libertarian-upset-with-the tax-code father always told me), and that people will come together to help others — donating a toy to a church, a can of soup to a food bank, what have you. And as John McCain would say, “I believe in America.” Well, I too believe in America. I mean if we don’t get our shit together, what is going to happen to the Japanese, Korean and French? We kind of have no choice.
The economy, like my life, is just a series of highs and lows. Of course I miss the 90’s. I always say that. The 90’s were good times. Echo and the Bunnymen, Hillary healthcare, your first Palm Pilot, the startups and of course, Kurt and Courtney. I mean we didn’t even know how good we were feeling. But for every up, there has to be a down.
And 2008, a total crap year, has taught us not to take all those parties/dinners/jeans/dresses/tickets/cocktails/cars for granted. You can’t take your job for granted anymore. You can’t even take your life for granted — more people are broke, and as such, crime goes up. So maybe now we’ll all be a little bit more grateful and a little less shallow. I know…. being deep can be kind of boring. The shallow people do have great parties and way better cocktails. It is a drag to analyze life; it is much easier to just keep going on autopilot.
[Check back tomorrow for Hope’s plan of action.]
(59) Comments
Comments
FIRST
ducktales xoxo.com
"The 90's were good times. Echo and the Bunnymen, Hillary healthcare, your first Palm Pilot, the startups and of course, Kurt and Courtney."
What are you, like 60?
Don't forget Pearl Jam!
GOOD POST
"associates during paralegal work?" -- thats pathetic mysTTTal.
Also, drinking alone has never been in. You're just so fat that the person drinking next to you at a bar is so far away it seems like you're drinking alone.
I'm put Echo and the Bunnymen in the 80s, but I'm old.
The 90's were lame; the 80's were awesome. Awesome to the max.
2- an appropriate post. The ducktales were a great part of the 90s.
6
Equally is not more pathetic is your excoriating Mystal for a post written by someone else.
This government attorney can't afford to live in DC on a first year salary.
Fuck the raise for federal judges, first year feds to 190K!
I didn't believe we were in a depression until I saw that Hope was allowed to post another article.
Don't leave out the Walsh twins and their uber cool pals (except David Silver).
Don't leave out the Walsh twins and their uber cool pals (except David Silver).
10, Elie is what one might call an "editor," who in the real world edits and proofreads posts made by others. Now you know what "editor" means.
2009 will be fine. It will be the year of the ASS LOBSTER. >o'|'o<
In your need to be edgy, you've put Echo & the Bunnymen completely in the wrong decade. Maybe you should have said "when I discovered Echo & the Bunnymen."
You cannot both speak wistfully about the '90s, as if you lived through them as a sentient being, and NOT KNOW that there were massive lawyer layoffs in the early 90s and early 00s. Certainly, these layoffs are worse, but CLEARLY there have been times before when there weren't deals and we didn't really need lawyers.
I was in 7th grade in 1990. Either you were far younger OR you live under a rock.
Furthermore, the haves will not necessarily take care of all the have nots -- not when the haves don't have very much and don't sympathize with the have nots. Or maybe they'll act, but way too late. It will also be surprising if our new president will have an impact on white guilt -- and the donations that stem from that white guilt.
I'm going to assume that one of mysTTTal's neck rolls has grown so large that it has become self-aware and now posts on ATL...see post #10 for proof
Zzzzzzz
"I cater not cook. I'm not cooking eggs for anyone -- and certainly not because some man (black or white) got elected president."
Anyone suprised that Hope Winters is a lonely, old bag?
This post was silly, uninformed and inane. I am embarrassed for myself that I continued reading after the jump. I am embarrassed for this page that this post was not only deemed worthy of inclusion but also deemed worthy of a repeat performance tomorrow. Pretty much an editorial fumble.
I agree with just about everything in this post except the reference to Echo and the Bunnymen. They didn't put out anything good in the 90s.
This is why Kash has a LOBSTER in her ASS and Hope only has a turd that looks like Mystal.
Content aside, at least it was written coherently.
Me Chinese, me play joke, me put pee pee in your coke.
-Eliza Grey
Are you guys being serious when you say that KASH has a lobster in her ass?
Bring back grunge!
Bring back grunge!
What is the point of this drivel? Will it be revealed tomorrow? I breathlessly await.
27 - When did grunge leave? I thought it just transmorgified into emo.
hope winters is officially the second worst poster on this blog. i demand payment for the 3 minutes i spent reading this absolutely pathetic entry. i will accept payment in the form of a LOBSTER DINNER!!!!
This blog is getting so fucking lame
Agreed 31 and 19. Enough of this drivel. What fcuking firm is handling the Chrysler/Fiat "merger"?
"associates doing paralegal work"
..how could that ever be a bad thing..maybe the deals will be done right for once...
StrOOOOOOOOOOK!
Eff grunge, the 90s were all about trip hop -- Portishead, Massive Attack, Hooverphonic, Morcheeba, Faithless ...
Hope Winter's writing is freaking depressing.
I don't care what decade it is... time stands still when I am NAILING SHEEP.
Good post! The 90s WERE better, that's why Obama is bringing back all the members of government from that era to fix our mess now.
"not because some man (black or white) got elected president"
Hope = racist, sexist and probably unattractive or she would be cooking breakfast for her man.
BITCH SPREAD DEM BUTT CHEEKS SO I CAN BUTTER UP THAT LOBSTER IN YOUR JUICY INSIDES!
hope's writing sucks
Yes Hope's writing sucks but I'd still do her.
Yes Hope's writing sucks but I'd still do her.
The President of the United States of America
BARACK HUSSAIN OBAMA
DC to 190k.
The President of the United States of America
BARACK HUSSAIN OBAMA
DC to 190k.
Best sentence of the day: "Pretty soon they'll be bringing polio back, too."
you are a terrible writer.
Why are so many of the commenters on ATL mean and nasty? (not to mention gross and sexist to the extreme...) I rarely read a thoughtful comment on here.
Not to get too technical, but the Collective Soul song you're quoting from ("Run") is on the Dosage album, not the Blender album. By the way, Dosage was about 500 times better than Blender; plus the cover to the album is way cooler.
As long as we're correcting musical statements (and echoing 7 and 17's comments, no pun intended), Echo and the Bunnymen are usually associated with the 80's, not the 90's. Crocodiles was released in 1980, Ocean Rain in '84, etc. There were only three albums released in the 90's (one without McCulloch), and none of them are considered seminal.
Hey Hope. That Collective Soul album cover artwork is copy protected pursuant to media title rights held by Atlantic Records.
Hey Hope. That Collective Soul album cover artwork is copy protected pursuant to media title rights held by Atlantic Records.
Holy crap. That was so ridiculously stupid and boring I couldn't even get through it. And this is from someone who's only better thing to do is research. Bloody frikken research.
I need a beer.
Another enjoyable Hope Winters read! I have missed them. I particularly like the polio line! Funny. But the comments ring true as well - depressions are no fun! BRING ON THE PROZAC!
:-)
This board is so weird. There are really thoughtful, helpful comments from people who really want to share information, and then a whole bunch of racist, sexist spam from trolls who want to exclude everyone else from the dialogue.
Don't despair, not even over the fact that you don't despair.
Finally! i've been waiting for something new from Hope! Too bad the majority of people who comment sound like teenage techno-geeks who only wish they could have a girlfriend as smart and savy as Hope! Hope is correct-this is a depressing recession. I'm looking forward to part two! Thanks Hope:)
The polio made me laugh out loud: much improved. (On the other hand, the Echo & the Bunnymen made me scoff out loud . . . )
I cannot believe how crude, inarticulate and down right nasty some of you are. If you had any class about you (which clearly you don't) you'd remember a lesson you should have learned as a child: 'if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. ' I feel sorry for you mean-spirited, obviously miserable posters. Hope is a great escape from these formidable times and I continue to look forward to escaping more often. Don't lose faith, Hope!