primero

First, I thought people were sticking it out because of the economy?

Arbah.

Marin, great post. Start a coup to overthrow the current EIC, whose wit is non-extant.

First to say that I recently watched Office Space and that it now seems a bit dated, probably due to it having been supplanted by "The Office"

Bob Cohen must have been your prof....pretty good description of him.

Looking like a pretty easy week around here for the ole GP. Marin is kicking ass.

I wise man once told me, "You can afford to get married twice, but only to get divorced once. "

"Some divorce lawyers include a clause in the payment agreement allowing them to ask for a voluntary gratuity in the event of a very good result. When the case is over, the lawyer may remind you of this..."

Where I work, this clause is applicable only where a lawyer is able to achieve a swift, highly favorable settlement for the client. The billable hours would have been very low (often fewer than ten hours), but the client averted significantly expensive litigation because of the lawyer's highly-skilled negotiating. It is not as simple as it being a gratuity. Of course, a client can always scoff at the clause and go to another lawyer, but the clause is usually there for a reason, i.e. the lawyer including such a clause is well worth the money.

Contingency fees in divorce cases (however shrewdly masked as gratuities) are forbidden under the Rules of Professional Conduct.

I feel like I have battered spouse syndrome. My rational mind does NOT want to read layoff rumors/news. People losing their jobs sucks. BUT, I've had to condition myself to such daily news that my emotional side doesn't feel right unless I'm reading tragic news. It feels like ATL doesn't love me unless it's giving me bad news. Hurt me ATL!

Signed,
happy-to-see-no-layoffs-but-sad-I'm-not-being-abused

Marin: please make yourself a permanent fixture of ATL.

holy schneikes! marin, ease up! Elie hasn't gotten shredded this bad since his first day of T-ball. what is this, four solid posts in a day???

I liked "Surviving Christmas."

Goddamn! Marin, you are kicking some ass! Even a reference to Office Space! You rock.

Oh, and 10 is absolutely correct!

What's Alex doing these days? Any chance he wants a piece of the writing action?

There is not a single law school in America that doesn't offer a course in Divorce Law/Family Law/Community Property.

Great point 17!

Marin, you are doing great.

I am thinking of becoming a specialist in gay divorce law. I think this will be a growth area in decades to come.

Only morons get married these days, anyway.

21 - I thought you wrote "Mormons" when I first skimmed your post. Works on both levels actually.

11 - I too miss that disgusting-but-can't-look-away-news, but on the bright side, the lack thereof seems to be keeping the law school trolls off the board.

20: Yes, you should make your move before any of those stupid, poorly-educated divorce lawyers come up with that idea!

I am doing fine as I am at Skadden.

This does not stand to reason, it sits and inches across the floor like a dog with worms.

Great job, Marin! Are you going to still be doing the advice column this week?

Marin heads assemblllllllllleeeee!

I always thought it was "end scene."

And Office Space kicks the Office's ass any day.

"It is not as simple as it being a gratuity. Of course, a client can always scoff at the clause and go to another lawyer, but the clause is usually there for a reason, i.e. the lawyer including such a clause is well worth the money. "

or, uh, the client could still put the lawyer on retainer and just not pay the, you know, voluntary assessment. so what if it's only 10 hours work? if the same outcome is achieved in 10 hours as in 200, the divorce lawyer has 190 more hours of his life to bill or enjoy as he sees fit. an excellent outcome in 10 hours will still gross a top divorce lawyer close to ten grand, which ain't bad for, you know, ten hours' work.

For every feature of practicing family law that seems like gravy, i.e. a gratuity clause, there's another feature that makes it more difficult to make money. Matrimonial lawyers are subjected to far more restrictions than most lawyers, especially in New York. It's as it should be - the stakes are much higher in those kinds of cases - but the notion that practicing that kind of law is a quick or easy way to make a buck is ridiculous.

nice post, marin--so did gandolfini make a pass at you after class?

30:

Also, at least in my state, the bar receives the second most client complaints from clients of divorce lawyers (behind only criminal defense).

Nice post.

Divorce, er, marital dissolution lawyers, are very important in our divorce-prone society. They have to know mediation, tax, real estate, contracts, child custody matters, and all sorts of interesting generalist mattters. Makes for an interesting career. Plus each case is really interesting.

I am a family law attorney in a small town on the outskirts of a large metro area. Divorce lawyers might get a lot of bar complaints because our clients are "Joe Six Pack" people and this may be their only interaction with the law in their entire lives. Lawyers who handle commercial clients don't have that problem because they are likely to be educated business people; deal with attorneys every day; understand the role of the attorney; and understand the cost of good representation.

For example, I had a random phone call from a person yesterday who was unhappy with their attorney because they were billing for travel to the courthouse and for waiting for the case to be called by the judge. That attorney would have likely gotten a bar complaint if it hadn't been for me explaining all attorneys charge for travel and wait time. I suggested they hire attorney whose office was in close proximity to the courthouse if they were upset about two hour travel time on their bills.

Divorce law is fun too. The stories are great. "I mean I really don't know how I can be accused of adultery if it was her friend she invited over for a threesome." Plus, nothing aside from criminal law gets you into court more often. I am always arguing motions or having a hearing for temporary support. Lots of depositions and mediations too. You learn your state's civil procedure really well and when you decide you've had enough baby momma drama then you go do commercial litigation.

34: People don't understand how insane and vindictive clients can be in family law (never mind criminal law). Sure, there are terrible family lawyers out there who screw clients. More often than not, however, clients are devastated by a bad outcome (often custody-related) and turn on their lawyers. The only recourse they have is to either sue their lawyer or file an ethical complaint.

None of you know crap about divorce law, and quit bitching about the clients. It's a rigged system of destruction that the judges, lawyers and other "professionals" use to bootstrap their financial well being on the unknowing "average joe" who has to subject themselves to the legal system. The deal is you walk in, the attorney decides based on the size of the marital estate how long they are going to string things along, and then they tell you to settle when the money runs out. They antagonize the other side, take unnecessary depositions, act like adversaries with opposing consel and then laugh and joke together at the fools they take advantage of during their "family law seminars". It's a joke.