CC: The General Public, The Grammar Police, NYPD, LVPD
FROM: Elie Mystal
SUBJECT: Whereabouts and Other Sundries
I will be out of the office from right about now until Monday, February 23rd.
I have not been fired (so far as I am aware). My performance is not under review. I’m not having a heart attack. Nobody took my stapler. I’m not stuck at “the Sizzler” waiting for the jaws of life to pry me out of the door. I’m just taking a little vacation.
Above the Law won’t miss a beat. Lat and Kash will both be around as always, breaking news, providing insight, and keeping all of the readers in the loop.
But, for extra help during these crazy times, we’re bringing in a guest editor.
You know her, you love her, many of you voted for her six months ago: Marin will be girl-in-the-know next week on Above the Law. I trust that everybody will treat her with the same kindness and respect that I’ve come to so thoroughly enjoy.
I’ll not be checking email or voice mail, nor will I be scanning the sky for smoke signals. Carrier pigeons and other messenger fowl will be shot on sight.
Please send all of your tips, questions, concerns, hot documents, and non-sequitur ideas to firstname.lastname@example.org, so that Lat, Kash, and Marin know what you want to read about.
And if you happen to be in Vegas this weekend, feel free to stop by and say hi. I’ll be the loudest guy at Venetian, the broke guy in the Bellagio poker room, or the mentally unstable, homeless-looking person taking money from people with no understanding of European history at Excalibur.