Can’t Find Work? Get Plastic Surgery!
We probably don’t even need to say it, but it’s a tough job market right now. A degree from a top school and a stint at a top firm aren’t enough to guarantee even an interview these days. According to amNewYork, some desperate job seekers are done revamping their résumés. Now, they’re revamping their bodies:
Several New York plastic surgeons said they’ve seen a bump in business, largely from female executives or attorneys in their 40s or 50s who are competing with 20- or 30-year-olds who may appear more energetic.“They want to look younger, and they want to look better and not look tired,” said Dr. Mauro Romita, a Manhattan plastic surgeon. “If you look older than you are and you look tired people may not think you can handle a busy schedule.”
Has it come to this? Do job-searching attorneys really need to get Botoxed to score a Biglaw gig? Can’t they just buy a nice suit and do the cucumber-over-the-eye thing?
That’s not what the ladies think, according to this survey:
[A] recent survey showed that about 3 percent of women had work done to boost their perceived value at work. The survey, conducted by the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, showed that 73 percent of women believe that youthful looks are playing a larger part than ever on the job front.
That survey was done by Plastic Surgeons, so we’re a bit skeptical. Biglaw attorneys should look tired and haggard — it’s like a job requirement.
Update: But if you are interested in having cosmetic surgery, and if you live in the New York tristate area, Lat urges you to talk to his parents. Ask for the Above the Law discount.
Let’s get some better numbers, after the jump.
If the American Society of Plastic Surgeons had dropped by your firm with this survey, how would you have responded?
New Yorkers boosting job prospects with surgery [AM New York]
(55) 
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Dear Kash,
No it has not come to that. Therefore, this is a non-story.
first, hells yes!
You can't put lipstick on a corpse.
Don't listen to 1 Kash. Enjoyable story.
And you are a much better writer than Elie and should take over.
Don't listen to 1 Kash. Enjoyable story.
And you are a much better writer than Elie and should take over.
Kash, I think you are beautiful. How would you like to date a rich attorney in Austin?
If you have a book of business, you could look like the bastard love child of Roseanne Barr and Billy Bob Thornton and find a job. If not, get on your knees and start praying...or doing something else, if that's what it takes.
This is a great idea for women. It is also an affirmation that women are not important past their appearance--they are just at the firm for our visual enjoyment.
I believe this story is pure rubbish. Although I have not been a member of the hiring committee since the mid 1990s, parnters at peer firms know that a uber attractive female attorney is an invitation for a sexual harasment lawsuit. They are simply a liability. It reminds of an incident that happened in 1986 where two partners at the firm were having a relationship with a young and attractive female associate. The associate was terminated for performance reasons and she sued the firm. The firm eventually settled for a large six figure sum, which increased our insurance premiums. We have learned from those mistakes. Most of our younger partners have the social grace of a sloth and are encouraged to pay for companionship outside of the firm.
looking old and tired looks like you're a hard worker as opposed to a youthful looking person who spends more time at the spa than billing hours
Is that a man in the picture? There is absolutely NO cleavage! Not even a hint of one. Perhaps she should be looking into a pair of enhancements rather than botox. Her face is actually quite smooth.
From one partner emertius to another.....you know a partner will do anything that spreads their legs, no matter what they look like.
It's the dogs that are more eager anyway.
"I gotcha. New York, third-wave feminist, college-educated, single and pretending to be happy about it, over-scheduled, undersexed, you buy any magazine that says 'healthy body image' on the cover, and every two years you take up knitting for ... a week."
As an alternative, I would suggest a piping hot beef injection.
Injector of the Beef
OK I'm not big law - but shouldn't you have job security by your 40s-50s?
Beef Injector, I missed you!
Vince Schlomi
6 - Who you pimpin' for?
Lots of male executives have been getting cosmetic surgeries in this decade. This is not new. Men are the primary candidates having the surgeries to get and keep their jobs. Women usually get cosmetic surgeries for their men or to get men, not jobs, unless you're talking about working at Hooters.
http://www.usatoday.com/money/companies/2006-03-20-ceo-facelifts-usat_x.htm
15, you should but you don't.
I agree. The less your face looks like a big wad of munger, the better.
Isn't Munger a top law firm?
more energetic = huge fake jugs
Lots of male executives have been getting cosmetic surgeries in this decade. This is not new. Men are the primary candidates having the surgeries to get and keep their jobs. Women usually get cosmetic surgeries for their men or to get men, not jobs, unless you're talking about working at Hooters.
http://www.usatoday.com/money/companies/2006-03-20-ceo-facelifts-usat_x.htm
Everyone should just work out. Most lawyers can stand to lose 20 pounds.
15 - Is that what they're teaching in school?
23 - Wow, did your face doc do a good sales job with you.
15 - Is that what they're teaching in school?
23 - Wow, did your face doc do a good sales job with you.
Most big law attorneys should invest in a good substance abuse program before plastic surgery. I mean sure late nights make you look tired, but the mountains of coke do not help.
Most big law attorneys should invest in a good substance abuse program before plastic surgery. I mean sure late nights make you look tired, but the mountains of coke do not help.
Wait, Lat is a Mexican? No wonder he got into Yale.
can i get a buttcheek lift?
#30 - I do each day when I arrive in my office.
cans and jugs. start there.
30 - Sure, lean over, put your hand behind you...
29 - Lat is Asian (Filipino - they often have Spanish surnames). See the New York Times profile of him:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/01/22/technology/22njCOVER.html
Can anyone please tell me the name of the actor whose photo Partner Emeritus is using? Or at least a movie he was in? Its driving me nuts.
Damn, all the plastic surgery in the world won't help who ever that is that is pictured. Is it a dude or dudette?
11 you obviously have not seen a naked woman, cleavage isn't that high unless they're wearing a push-up.
11, agreed, the model in the picture looks like a man/tranny who's had way more work than just botox done. In addition to the flat, masculine chest, check out the big jaw and superman chin.
This comment is addressed to post no. 35.
Several folks on this blog have commented that my photograph is that of an actor. I can assure you, I am not an actor. However, I have been told that I resemble James Cromwell, the actor. Perhaps you should be more concerned with your dying career than trying to place my visage in some cockamamie movie that cannot escape your feeble mind.
Holy shit, 38, it's John Tesh with eyeliner! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_h7Lm7C9Nk
7: Only homely girls are delusional enough to believe that female looks don't matter and that ANYONE is successful on merit alone. I'm hot and I wouldn't trade it for the world. I happen to also be an intelligent woman with good grades from a great law school. That entire package is important ... stop being a buzz kill!
Wow, I had no idea that John Tesh composed the old (and awesome) NBA theme song. Or that he is now a woman.
Also, the deltoids (or trapezius or whatever those muscles are on the side of the neck) are very manly as well.
I hope this trend trickles down to law school. Some of the "law school hot" ladies could certainly use a nip here and a tuck there - and big fake jugs.
Hey Partner Emeritus -- That's not James Cromwell--look him up on IMDB. How could you not know where you got the picture?
13, what is that from? It is driving me crazy.
45 - 30 Rock, although I do recommend Google next time. Try it, you'll like it.
i'm glad i went to a cheap public school
46 - my priest told me to try it and that I'd like it. I didn't like it, but I won my lawsuit and now I own a 3500 sq ft. wife in suburban Boston.
How about working out and not pigging out instead of plastic surgery? There's a novel thought for the Sex-in-the-City generation
Partner Emeritus is an idiot.
Holy freakin' clavicle!
43 - yeah, like the brick-faced males at law school are such hot commodities....
Do I have to be over 50 to think gangbusters is cool?
53, are you the poster who was ranting the other day about someone who use the word "gangbusters" in a post? You had no idea what it meant and was calling the poster who used it all sorts of names?
Seriously? Are you still on that?
lawyers peak in their fifties, then fade away.