Lawsuit of the Day: Perez Hilton
Luckily, none of my critics have the guts to punch me in the face. But I suppose if one of my faceless, nameless tormentors did clock me upside the head — and lived to tell about it — my next move would be to file a really bitchy lawsuit. And then blog about it. Fun times!
It should go without saying that Perez Hilton has taken his alleged assault at the hands of the Black Eyed Peas to the next level. Here’s the introduction to his lawsuit against the Black Eyed Peas’ road manager, Polo Molina:
Of course, Perez uses the lawsuit to get another dig in at the Black Eyed Peas’ new album:
That the Black Eyed Peas’ new album kind of sucked is now a matter of the public record.
But after the jump, Hilton gets to the real point of the matter.
Popsquire lays out why this lawsuit could be more annoying to the Black Eyed Peas than your average, run-of-the-mill, “our roadie administered a beat-down, how much do you want,” kind of lawsuit celebrities are accustomed to:
The real question is how this will end. Civil lawsuits typically are about money and most often end in settlement. Perez likely has plenty of cash, so this lawsuit seems to be about proving a point and defending his right to blog.You can hate him, but you can’t blame him for defending himself.
Perez himself makes his real point, later in the document:
“Violence is never the answer.” Wise words from Mario Lavandeira a/k/a Gandhi Hilton.
Perez Hilton v. Polo Molina.pdf [Popsquire]
Perez Hilton Files Lawsuit For Battery [Popsquire]




Comments
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None of my critics HAS the guts...
second!
Perez Hilton = The White Elie Mystal
Yup, this will be messy. "Lavandeira" will be rhymed with something derogatory on the next B.E.P. album.
Paris got that BOOM, BOOM, POW!
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Wrong, 1.
It would have been useful to engage counsel who could draft an allegation rather than simply bitch. I'm just sayin'.
Elie=tough guy????
Partner Emeritus,
Please provide your analysis of the Complaint.
8 -- $5 says Perez drafted the original, and it had a MSPaint drawing of will.i.am. with a cock drawn next to his mouth.
Mystal, that is not a very flattering picture of your brother.
Elie needs to challenge his critics to a combination spelling/boxing showdown.
If the defense could win a motion in limine precluding Hilton from whining and bitching, this would be a slam dunk d-verdict.
I always find it so crass when a plaintiff's complaint is dramatic. Save it for opening statements, counselor.
Since his stupid affirmative action rant, I would be willing to step into the ring with Elie.
Lavandeira represents what is wrong with today's youth. All fluff and no substance. Talking about events and people is a pass time for simpletons. Coming up with ideas and executing them seems to be an archaic concept for most these days. Lavandeira is a buffoon who ironically received a well deserved black eye from a musical group called "black eye..."
1. What is Perez Hilton famous for? Why do so many people care about him?
2. Why does Elie find it necessary to ridicule him for his contention that violence is the wrong way to handle criticism ("Ghandi Hilton")?
I hope he gets less than average for being such ultra pink p*ssy.
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No one is arguing that he does not have a right to write a blog. Such a stupid argument.
Any California attorneys care to opine about any possible jurisdictional issues?
I mean it seems a bit of a stretch to me (NOT a CA attorney), the complaint is mostly about the battery in Toronto, Canada (that should be Toronto, Ontario, Canada, but presumably the lawyers doing the drafting didn't know or didn't want confusion with Ontario CA), what are California's standards for accepting jurisdiction?
Is Mystal African American?
Anyone who thinks this lawsuit is about protecting Perez's "constitutional" right to blog is a bigger fool than he is. He got punched because of what he called Will.I.Am approximately three seconds before the punch was thrown, not because of what he wrote on a blog.
None of your critics has the wingspan to reach over that belly.
I hope Perez Hilton loses.
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25 wins
Is there a way to blame Obama for this?
I'd clock you upside the head, but then again, I would be afraid of a vicious counter-punch from your left moob.
#29 - unfortunately, no. But we can blame systemic diworsity for enabling both Obama and Mystttal to "get ahead" in life. Hope and change people. Just keep smiling, and ignore the harmful results.
"Luckily, none of my critics have the guts to punch me in the face."
Your critics allege that your excess guts are the result of you stuffing your fat face.
Elie,
Seriously, "none" is singular. Perez was not beat by a critic. The assailant was a subject of his blog, not one of its readers. And why are you trying to sound like a tough guy?
1 is right. 7 are wrong.
"But after the jump, Hilton gets to the real point of the matter": M-O-N-E-Y.
PS to 30 and 32: You are not even fit to shine the shoes of Elie's lowely INTERNS. How do you like them moobs?
A few years ago I lost the shears I used to trim my goats. A petulant little boy named Grigor taunted me in the village, claiming that I preferred my goats with long hair so I could stroke them at night in the fields in place of a woman. I wanted to beat him with my crook, but instead I told Grigor that I desired to make peace and I offered him a drink of kirsch. When Grigor became inebriated and passed out, I sold him to a band of wandering Gypsies. I used the money to buy new shears.
If Lat had written this story, it would have included a clever "black-eyed" pun.
Let's see - excessive capitalization, misspelling of "lowly," unfunny comeback... Mystttal? Is that you?
To be fair 33, in order for the alleged puncher to know what was written on the blog, he likely had to have read it, which would make him a "reader".
While embarrassed that I read the entire lawsuit, there were some gems in there like how Perez "transforms gossip into journalism" and how he inexplicably got punched in the face...from behind. WTF?
34, like the subtleness.
While embarrassed that I read the entire lawsuit, there were some gems in there like how Perez "transforms gossip into journalism" and how he inexplicably got punched in the face...from behind. WTF?
39, not necessarily and not a "reader" like Elie's. Elie's critics read his posts throughout the day because they cannot wait to pounce on him him as they have nothing better to do. Regardless, I bet 99.5% of them are not subjects of his blog. They just don't like him. The more I read his posts, the more I can relate to them.
Selling your tormentor to gypsies > suing your tormentor for Restatement 90 violation
Congrats on the new shears, 36.
Perez is a hypocritical, whiny little beeyatch. His sack of crap lawsuit will be laughed out of court. The Black Eyed Peas should fund a Carrie Prejean suit against Perez for slander.
If Molina alone punched him, the BEP should be pissed that they are being dragged into this and that their name is all over this complaint.
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Farrah Fawcett just died.
http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/FarrahFawcett/id=7464123&page=1
"and lived to tell about"
I think Elie just threatened murder! Juries of healthy people convict fat guys every time, Elie.
41- fail
This is one of those crimes that's best left unsolved.
47 = Perez Hilton
Of course the case won't go to trial, but there will be a settlement "the terms of which are confidential." That is all.
I would pay $3 to see Mystal and Perez smear bbq sauce all over each others moooobs.
Captain Bangaroo
And not a word about the hate crime perpetrated by Lavandeira just before he was punched.
Polo Molina must be the black sheep of the family. All his other brothers are major league ballplayers, and he manages a band fronted by a woman?
Before reading the comments I was prepping myself for a boom boom pow reference. Thank you #5
Farrah Fawcett just died.
http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/FarrahFawcett/id=7464123&page=1
55 - I would manage a band over baseball too, if it got me fronted by Fergie...
Is it just me, or is this a really poorly written complaint? I'm a 3L, so I'm interested to hear people's thoughts on the substance of the complaint.
did her/him/it
Mystal gotta get that FOOD FOOD FOOD!
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I hope Hilton chokes on a dick and dies.
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43 -- the word you are looking for is "irregardless."
I still can't believe that so many people can't keep the regardless/irregardless thing straight.
Black Eyed Peas suck so bad. Can I get an "Amen"?
59 - your eyes do not deceive you. This Complaint is a sack of crap.
65 - EPIC FAIL
what a horribly written complaint. i hope the lawyer is doing this for free.
65:
http://irregardless.org/
http://englishplus.com/grammar/00000224.htm
Thanks
65- irregardless is never appropriate. Go back to Suffolk
65=Elie
wow - you keep "I hope Hilton chokes on a dick and dies." but delete my "I want to spread his cheeks..."
who is moderating these posts? a chimp?
@72 - Don't know why yours was deleted. Maybe mine was just plausible.
-63
@73 - I should be able to express my bigotry in any forum...
- 72
@74 - I don't disagree.
-73
65
I hope you were kidding
my 7 year old knows that "irregardless" is NOT a word
it is one of by biggest pet peeves
please tell me you work at a bigfirm
65
I hope you were kidding
my 7 year old knows that "irregardless" is NOT a word
it is one of by biggest pet peeves
please tell me you work at a bigfirm
30 - Eric Holder is going to make it a crime to criticize Perez. New Hate Crime Legis = more Federal Eric Holder Power, that States once had.
http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/06/25/holder.hate.crimes/index.html
@65
Irregardless of what you might think, "irregardless" is not a word.
This should be a lesson to Perez and bloggers like him. If you mess with a thug you stand a pretty good chance of getting punched. I'm surprised Perez didn't try spinning this into some type of hate crime against homosexuals.
May this be a lesson to you Perez -- if you attack someone's musical abilities they might just attack your face.
yo you guys like star wars
because perez hilton is like the emperor dissolving the galactic senate except it doesn't work because the internet can't be ruled by fear of one blog or the planetary governors (which is elie i guess) this metaphor is kind of breaking down but anyway star wars is great
80 - It would have been tough for the pipe-eating pink-domed troll to turn this into a hate crime, being that what actually got him punched wasn't a post on his website, but the fact that he called will.i.am a 'f*cking faggot.'
Spread
anyone seen my beads? they were here a minute ago. wait a minute...oops.
I for one appreciate your humor, Goat Herder.
Way better than Prof. Emm.
36 = underappreciated.
BSTBCSICSTJI
Matt Sheppard dies, but that worthless waste of carbon Hilton lives on in widespread adulation. The universe is unfair.
Isn't Lavendaria something you get from having sex with CWT female associates?
Getting to the law suit, the complaint looks like it was written by a first semester, first year law student as a draft of the first assignment. It's an absolutely horrible complaint.
@22-plaintiff lives in CA, defendants live in CA, I don't think there are any PJ issues. Maybe someone can change the venue based on witnesses out there, etc., but if this is a tort claim for assault what is the problem?
You're a rising 1L I take it?
WITCH TREAD THEM MUTT BEAKS SOW EYE CAN SPELL THE MOOSEY INSIDES!
I love will.i.am.
irregardless trolling is obv the new detrimental reliance trolling. you guys are gullible.
Luckily, the Complaint has the author's email address so we can all email him and berate his writing. Let's bring down their email servers in 3...2...1...
The authors of the complaint are alumni of NYLS and the University of the Pacific. Good thing Perez pulled out the top legal talent for this one. http://www.ftllp.com/attorneys.php
lol @ the complaint.
Perez tried to calmly say that he would not talk about them anymore. No mention of screaming f-cking f-ggot.'
Anyone who bases her estimation of a personal injury attorney on where the attorney attended law school is naive. Many pi attorneys were academic flops and couldn't draft a motion fit for federal court to save their lives. But they shine in front of a jury. It's pretty easy to allege the elements of assault, battery and negligence. That's all the drafting skills they really need. I've been in big law for almost five years. These guys make more money that I make and work half the time.
This complaint is a trainwreck.
91 - The defendant (singular) lives in Cali. The other (John Doe) defendants are never identified, other than in very cusrory terms, nor is the nature of their involvement or liability spelled out. I doubt the allegations against them pass muster even under the liberal standards of notice pleading.
Basically, the claims all arise from a fight that took place at a nightclub in a foreign country. Aside from the obvious venue issue, there are choice of law issues. The smartest thing this court could do is kick this thing to court in Toronto, where it belongs.
This complaint is a trainwreck.
91 - The defendant (singular) lives in Cali. The other (John Doe) defendants are never identified, other than in very cusrory terms, nor is the nature of their involvement or liability spelled out. I doubt the allegations against them pass muster even under the liberal standards of notice pleading.
Basically, the claims all arise from a fight that took place at a nightclub in a foreign country. Aside from the obvious venue issue, there are choice of law issues. The smartest thing this court could do is kick this thing to court in Toronto, where it belongs.
91 -22 again. I just skimmed the claim, I didn't see that the defendants lived in CA also. If I knew they (and re the battery, the manager specifically) lived in CA, I wouldn't have needed to ask the question.
Maybe I should have assumed it, but there are east coast celebrities also...
Assuming there's no jurisdictional issue, would the CA court apply Ontario, Canada law re the alleged battery (to the extent there might be differences e.g. in calculating damages if liability is found)?
I am a lawyer, I just haven't had occasion to deal with jurisdictional or choice of laws issues for quite some time. I don't mind the attempted gibe, especially since you provided additional information.
99-
Agreed on the complaint, etc. But I still don't think there are really any objections on jurisdictional grounds. Defendant still lives in CA, general jurisdiction ought to do it. CA state courts have general SMJ as well.
-91
Black Eyed Peas suck and Perez Hilton is a fag. It's a win-win here. Let these two battle it out. Perez gets beat up and the band has to pay a shit ton of money for it.
lol @ 97,
were you there?
lol @ u either way.
-lulz
Moat Goat Herder
Moar Goat Herder
effin iPhone autospellcheck
Hey 106, my Blackberry pwns your I-phone, n00b
This happened in Canada. In which jursidiction is the action filed?
I think CA court is the right venue for convinience, and where the D resides. However, I think they'll apply Canadian law and I could be wrong, but isn't assault in Canada just a criminal action? I know Canadians are adverse to civil litigation.
98 - How should someone who thinks they have a claim go about finding a good PI attorney?
I'm not sure about this, but Perez may have a claim of promissory estoppel against BEP. I think there was some detrimental reliance here. Any thoughts?
109 - 101 etc. again.
They have all the newfangled stuff like civil law claims for battery (which have only been around for, what, hundreds of years?) up in Canada...
Except for Quebec which has its own weirdnesses (think Louisiana, i.e. based on civil law rather than common law), Canadian civil law in a general sense is pretty similar to most U.S. states, the biggest difference is no automatic right to trial by jury (and litigators generally aren't in favor of civil jury trials) and damages generally speaking are not as high.
110-ask a defense attorney. They know who the good ones are that actually work your file, and who the crappy ones are that just put it in an assembly line of paralegals and will settle for whatever comes ou the other end.
Generally, I'd say if they are advertising on TV, you are likely to get the latter rather than the former.
Venue is probably fine since both parties live in CA. Why have them do it in Canada when it's massively inconvenient to plaintiff AND defendant? Likewise, I don't think there's a lot of questions for witnesses, at least not where you couldn't also find witnesses also subject to the court's jurisdiction (like Will. I. Am. and his posse). The main issue is a choice of law question, and I think that by itself isn't enough to make venue necessarily improper. I doubt either party will raise the venue issue, anyway, so the court would have to do it sua sponte. Pretty unlikely unless there were serious jurisdictional concerns where the judge was freaking out that he could be reversed. Which we've established there aren't.
And in case anyone was wondering, yes, state courts can apply the law of other jurisdictions.
Whn are we going to start seeing the "Mouth," as a dangerous weapon? Perez Whateverhis name, is
a self- hating, shameless self-promoting, horrifically judging, condemning freak of our times.
I'm glad he was punched, it's what he deserved. He punches people to the ground all the time with his evil mouth. He had it coming.
104- I wasn't there, but there is a video recording of what happened. And I have seen the video recording so...
bravo #5!
IIED claim = fail! This was a horribly pleaded complaint.
Pleaded? It,s plead you illiterate douche.
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I'd be afraid to punch Elie only because I fear my fist would get stuck in his fat, squishy face blubber.
#121 What are you? A little cotton-mouthed nerd with his hands in his pants? Come out from behind your screen
coward. I hate these hidden vicious assaults. Your mouth, like Perez's mouth,is a filthy weapon, I'm sure nobody's kissed, or will kiss in a long, long, time.
"Pleaded? It is plead you illiterate douche."
Actually, you ignorant douchebag, either "Pleaded" or "Pled" are correct--but NOT plead--as this site developed in a post and related poll asking readers to name their PREFERRED form. ("Pleaded" won 2-1")
http://abovethelaw.com/2008/01/a_random_friday_poll_pleaded_o.phpb
See also the relevant (to you) ATL poll "douchebag vs. douche bag" vs. douche-bag" at
http://abovethelaw.com/2008/03/a_random_friday_poll_f3d_and_t.php
An affirmative defense to assault is that the person assaulted was a db.
Perez thinks an LA jury will like him? Did he file in the West Hollywood branch of the superior court?
Wait, where is the part of the complaint where Perez mentions how he called will.i.am a "faggot" to his face? I must have missed that part.
when did ellie become such a tough guy? perhaps he thinks his moobs will provide sufficient protection for any assault to come his way
Elie, being part black doesn't give you some innate ability to fight, any more than it does for other blacks who think that a lot of trash talk constitutes an ass whupping.
128: SHUT UP! BLACK POWER!
#127: What's wrong BullyTwo Shoes, prefer nothing between yo and your target of the moment? Snarling Vipers never go far in this world, so perhaps you should rethink your choice of persona? Unless, of course you're such an outsider, it's all you know. In which case get better at it. Because in case you haven't got it yet, sophomoric sarcasm went out with sitcoms, and pissy-mouthed spewing is pre-teen masturbatory behavior best saved for when you're playing video games with at least one friend, I hope you have.
hmmm. I am just a lowly bar student, but according to my con law prep class, violation of the right to freedom of speech requires a govt action. Is Molina an enforcer for the US govt, and if so, what was he doing in Canada?
3 letters for this dude - F-A-G!!!!
I wish more people would assault hilton.
Hilton really cared about free speech when he called for Ms. California's ouster simply for holding a view he disagreed with. This guy is the most worthless piece of crap I've ever seen. I'm glad he got punched.
I've seen a lot of homophobic comments on this blog lately. I'm guessing most of these commentors are guidos from Jersey who gel their hair and make up the target market for products like Extenze.
what are the chances a jury finds for perez w/re the IIED/battery, awards $1 in damages, and then awards will.i.am (assuming he's made a party somehow) $10,000 for slander/sexual harassment?
i doubt it's a coincidence will.i.am isn't a party since it doesn't appear too difficult to establish molina was acting as his agent (and in this case could likely be held liable for even molina's intentional torts).
but what the hell, i haven't dealt with torts since the bar exam . . . .
ROFL @ 119 , the original illiterate douche
I'm glad this guy finally got what was coming to him. I know we live in a country for free speech which I love, but this guy has really stretched the boundaries with a lot of his awful remarks and innuendos. I'm not a homophobe, but I really dislike how this guy starts rumors about almost everyone being gay such as Zach Quinto, aka Sylar, Spock.
Punks jump up to get beat down!
Goat Herder should be a regular contributor to this site.
Hilton had it coming.
Pass it on.
Hilton had it coming.
Pass it on.