Lawyer of the Day: Larry Wood
We know many lawyers who agonize over the New Yorker magazine’s weekly caption contest, desperately hoping to come up with a gnomic, witty caption worthy of selection. But we know of only one lawyer who has managed to come up with a winning caption three times. Let us introduce you to Larry Wood, an attorney at the Legal Assistance Foundation of Metropolitan Chicago.
Wood, who also teaches a housing and poverty law class at the University of Chicago, has won the weekly contest more often than anyone else. (A slight technicality: A man by the name of Carl Gable has won three times, but one of those was the New Yorker’s annual contest, which has since been replaced by the weekly contests.)
Out of 38 submissions in the four-year history of the contest, Wood’s made it to the finals three times. That’s mighty impressive, given that he’s competing against at least 5,000 other caption entries each week, reports Steve Johnson of the Chicago Tribune. So how’d he do it? Here’s what he told us on the phone this morning:
Short is better. Incorporate everything that’s in the cartoon. In one cartoon I was working with, there was a dolphin and a panhandler. So I thought of all the cliches I could think of about dolphins and about panhandlers. Dolphins are extremely intelligent, etc. Then I came up with the caption that won. My colleagues thought it was a mean-spirited joke for a poverty lawyer to make.
Maybe lawyers have advantages in the caption contests. As one friend of ours noted in response to Wood’s advice, “incorporating all the elements into your answer is actually a skill lawyers are supposed to use in their bar exam essays (and law school tort exams).”
Check out Wood’s winners, including the controversial caption, after the jump.
Wood, a SUNY-Buffalo law grad who grew up in upstate New York, upset some of his Chicago legal aid colleagues with this winning caption. From the New Yorker:

Find his other winning captions here and here.
For more advice on writing a winning caption, check out this Slate piece. An excerpt:
[Y]our caption should elicit, at best, a mild chuckle. The first filter for your caption should be: Is it too funny? Will it make anyone laugh out loud? If so, throw it out and work on a less funny one.
So if the above did not make you guffaw, that’s what likely helped it to win.
Chicagoan Larry Wood wins New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest for record third time [Chicago Tribune]
Chicagoan wins New Yorker contest for third time, friend fears he won’t shut up about it [Romenesko]
Caption Contest #192 [New Yorker]
Caption Contest #123 [New Yorker]




Comments
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Figgiti FIRST!
Captain FIRST!
ATL has officially jumped the shark.
Lawyers are almost as funny as the New Yorker.
I've enjoyed reading your email.
I always wonder about these contests:
Did the artist originally draw the cartoon with no caption?
Is the artist paid on a per-panel basis, and is the caption included in the payment?
What if the cartoon was co-written by an artist and a caption-writer ... who gets paid, then?
Where is the original caption, if there was one? What was it?
Was it really so bad that the editors figured a random reader would come up with a better one?
Hmmm.
http://www.criminal-defense-lawyers-attorneys.com
these are fucking terrible.
Were poverty lawyers really upset because they thought the caption was making fun of pan-handlers? I thought the caption was making fun of dolphins.
--Elie
7- the caption is making fun of the evil white people who always tell homeless people to 'get a job' even though that oversimplifies a very complicated issue.
Chicken of the Sea!
This story is terrible
Wow, slow news day, much?
Gayfish
Next day at the New Yorker
Mr. Elinoff: So, J. Peterman wants to hire some of our cartoonists to illustrate your catalog?
Elaine: Well we're hoping that if perhaps that the catalog is a little funnier ,people
won't be so quick to return the clothes ha ha....For example.. I..I really do....Well I love this one
Elaine shows him the cartoon
Mr. Elinoff: Oh! yeah... That's a rather clever jab at inter office politics don't you think.
Elaine: Ahan, Ahan....yeah...Euh but, Why is it that the, that the animals enjoy reading the email?
Mr. Elinoff: Well Miss Benes . Cartoons are like gossamer and one doesn't dissect gossamer. heh..hemm..
Elaine; Well you don't have to dissect if you can just tell me. Why this is suppose to be funny?
Mr. Elinoff: Ha! It's merely a commentary on contemporary mores. (slides the magazine to her)
Elaine: But, what is the comment. (she slides the magazine back to him)
Mr. Elinoff: It's a slice of life.
Elaine: No it isn't.
Mr. Elinoff: Pun?
Elaine: I don,t think so.
Mr Elinoff: Vorshtein?
Elaine: That's not a word.....You have no idea what this means do you?
Mr Elinoff: No.
Elaine: Then why did you print it.
Mr. Elinoff: I liked the kitty.
Elaine: (gets up) You know what? you people should be ashamed of yourself, you know ya doodle a couple of bears
at a cocktail party talking about the stock market. You think you're doing comedy.
Mr. Elinoff: Actually that's not bad..
Elaine: Oh! really (laughs) well you know..... I have others
I would rather have an asslobster than a needy dolphin.
FAIL.
guys in my high school captioned new yorker cartoons with homeless dolphins all the time. it was no big deal. but no really, does the new SCOTUS judge have a landing strip?
#16 - No, she ate the landing strip.
"I would hope that a wise dolphin woman, with the richness of her experiences, would more often than not get a job faster than a white male."
-- SotomayOR!
He should change his name from Larry Wood to Harry Wood.
It's true -- the winning cartoons are never, ever funny. The point of the contest eludes me, except to make the average New Yorker reader, who is likely not unduly witty, feel they might one day see his or her name printed in the magazine.
why do comments take so long to post on this blog? other blogs post like instantaneously.
So its cool to just repost what law blog posts a couple hours later?
Hahaha... it's funny because it's TRUE!
If I was a New Yorker, I would be offended by this magazine.
Elie is a Walrus
Coo Coo Ka Choo!
epic fail.. everyone involved
22, please revisit that sentence. It's making my head hurt.
Poverty lawyers have no sense of humor. That's why everyone hates them.
Epic FAIL.. everyone involved.
I don't get it. Why is the woman telling the coffee-drinking dolphin to tell Elie to get a job instead of picking dingleberries out of his ass?
i noticed it but it seemed like too much effort to go back and add in the '
I think 30 actually just won this contest...
16, 17
Sotomayor is too damn fat to reach down to shave her pussy. It is fill grown...
If I was a Walrus, I would be offended by Elie.
16, 17
Sotomayor is too damn fat to reach down to shave her pussy. It is full grown...
Go to radosh.net for a better caption contest. Believe me.
Hahaha... it's funny because it's TRUE!
20 - nailed it on the head.
- New Yorker Reader
This story wasn't that interesting when the Law Blog did it hours ago. ATL repeating it is just plain sad.
The nerd in picture is typical effeminate limp bookish feckless scribe. No wonder males of his kind invented in vitro fertilization: necessity is the mother of invention.