‘Crotchety’ Lawyer of the Day: Johann Scott Scrimshire
Johann Scott Scrimshire is a Minneapolis attorney who likes to let it all hang out. He specializes in criminal defense and business corporate law, but is apparently unfamiliar with laws dealing with public nudity. From the Minneapolis Star Tribune:
Johann Scott Scrimshire, 42, was arrested about 6 a.m. near Calhoun Parkway after a 911 call about a man on a bicycle exposing himself to walkers and joggers.The officers who responded said Scrimshire told them he was training for a bike race on the West Coast in which participants ride nude, said Sgt. William Palmer, a Minneapolis police spokesman.
The officers said Scrimshire was wearing a skirt-like garment or a pair of shorts with the crotch area removed. Palmer said. “It clearly looked intentional,” he said.
Clearly.
Apparently, Scrimshire is training for the World Naked Bike Ride (moderately NSFW), an organization that holds naked bike rides in cities around the globe. The photo on this post is from the organization’s D.C. event. From the website, it doesn’t appear to be a very serious event; we wonder if others have been moved to don special “skirt-like” training gear in order to prepare.
Other than naked riding, we’re not sure what Scrimshire is up to these days. He used to be the primary name partner at personal injury firm Martineau, Gonko, & Vavreck — its website address still bears his initial: SMGV — but the firm tells us he left in April. Beyond that, the firm had no comment, and was not especially happy about this “exposure.”
As for Scrimshire, he tells the Tribune: “The charges are ridiculous, and the facts will come out in court.” We hope the facts are all that Scrimshire decides to put on display in court.
Cyclist arrested while training for naked bike race, police say [Minneapolis Star Tribune]
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Comments
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First to say that picture made me throw-up in my mouth a little
So THAT is where PE has been all week!!
1-2 = progressively more massive failures
Lolz 2, my favorite comment so far today.
- 1
The officers said Scrimshire was wearing a skirt-like garment or a pair of shorts with the crotch area removed. Palmer said. "It clearly looked intentional," he said.
Cops are brilliant. I guess they thought his junk just fell out of his shorts.
Scrimshire isn't the only person throwing his junk around.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090721/ap_on_sp_fo_ne/fbn_roethlisberger_lawsuit
3 here - WTF? The mods remove failed attempts at FIRSTs?
PE is in Fire Island engaging in wholesome nude frolics with similar minded men. However, he would be more than happy to engage in a meeting of minds with Scrimshire behind a sand dune.
3 here again - double WTF? The mods actually changed my post from "2-4" to "1-2" which doesn't make any sense since they deleted the failed FIRSTs I was referencing.
9,
You're way too concerned with anonymous incorrect non-firstymeisters.
This sounds like Arthur in Michael Clayton getting naked and going crazy.
10 - I'm concerned with stealth censorship of stupid crap.
Elie, how about a story on the summer associate controversy at Steptoe & Johnson?
If your firm has more than one partner named "Darryl", you may not work for a peer firm.....
Kash wrote this post!
Elie, how about a story on the summer associate controversy at Steptoe & Johnson?
What's wrong with being sexy?
If your only summer associate event takes place at a car wash, you may not work for a peer firm....
If your firm's reception area contains anything made of wicker, you may not work for a peer firm....
Kash censored me on an earlier post because I alluded to her wealth. We should all stop posting under her stories.
She is just another hot chick who takes herself way too seriously. Can't wait to see her turn 40.
Mystal used to hate it when his father would try and break into the neighbor's house naked.
If your firm requires clients to take a number, you may not work for a peer firm....
"Nobody likes wearing clothes in public, son, but it's the law..."
12, I saw your original post re 2-4. Stealth censorship exists!
If your firm's marketing materials make reference to a "lap sit", you may not work for a peer firm....
PE is too busy to post, he has the bar in 2 weeks people!!!!
20-
have you seen her profile picture? it looks like she already has. She comment banned me for reasons unknown, but I am now at a new ip, so i can comment and the joke is on them. at least for 3....2....1....
If you were subjected to a lice check during your callback interview, you may not work for a peer firm....
Scrimshaw
I got my law school banned from commenting.
Weird. Kashimir sounds like a guy's name, Elie sounds like a girl's name... I'm so confused!
Thanks a lot, Kash. I thought you liked us.
sad blarf
nice croTTTch
Somehow this item, like everything else posted today, is more noteworthy than the breakup of a well know Boston IP firm that was reported in the Globe today.
Back in the day we used to ride our bikes all over the place wearing just chaps. It was no big deal.
It'll never stand up in court.
They sure like getting up early in Minnesota. The early worm gets the bird.
Crim defense + corporate = anything he can get
What ever happened
to the naked guy at Cal?
Think it was in the 90's