Lawyer of the Day, Ohio State - Moritz College of Law

Law Student of the Day: Moritz Student DQ'ed from Dairy Queen

By  
on

Maybe the cratering legal economy has made one Ohio State Moritz College of Law student turn to a life of crime:

Edgartown Police are searching for a man who smashed the back door of the Dairy Queen ice cream shop on Upper Main Street early Saturday and tried to help himself to a pre-dawn snack….
A security camera captured the young man busting into the store at 4:45 am. Edgartown police provided the following description based on the video.
At 4:47 am “a white male forced the door open and entered the store,” according to the police report. “He proceeded to the front area behind the service counter and attempted to use the ice cream machines. One of the machines sprayed out a mess of liquid ice cream that got all over the suspect’s pants and feet. He gave up on the ice cream and then stuck his hands in some candy condiment bins. After a few moments he then exited the store.”

The man has been identified has Zachary L. Gould. He appears to be the same Zachary L. Gould that attends Moritz.
And yes, there is video. Hilarious drunken video. Check after the jump for more details.


The full security camera footage from the Dairy Queen has been posted on the Martha’s Vineyard Times. Click here to take a look.
Gould turned himself in, after reading the Martha’s Vineyard Times report online. He’s going straight to the “dude, I was totally wasted” defense that has served so many, so well:

The video was posted on The Times website, and photos were published in the print edition. Mr. Gould went to the Oak Bluffs Library Thursday morning and read the newspaper online.
“He called this morning after seeing your website,” said officer [Chris] Dolby. “He said he was so intoxicated at the time that he didn’t recall really even doing it, but once he saw the website this morning, he had fast recollection. He called an attorney, and turned himself in today at the station.”

In addition to his legal training at THE Ohio State, Vanity Fair reports that Zachary Gould has also interned for U.S. Senator Chris Dodd:

Apparently Gould’s degree in public policy and law from Trinity College and his experience interning for Senator Chris Dodd weren’t enough to teach him that one should take pains to avoid robbing a store that belongs to a cop.
Gould may not be your everyday rich kid, despite his khaki pants and Oxford shirt (both prominently visible in the Web site video). But for sure, he’s part of affluent culture, and it doesn’t speak well for the neighborhood when this kind of thing happens off the Cape.

Sponsored

It doesn’t speak well of the neighborhood when rich liberals commit crimes? Come on, was Chappaquiddick really that long ago?
No soft serve for ice cream shop culprit [Martha’s Vineyard Times]
Edgartown Dairy Queen bandit confesses to crime [Martha’s Vineyard Times]
Preppy Attack on Dairy Queen Spells Trouble [Vanity Fair]

Sponsored

Topics