Twosies

Well, I'm a male, single, unemployed recent law school grad. I'll volunteer my services.

Is she looking for donors?

Mystal, do not, I repeat, do not eat the baby. Babies are not snack foods.

as a woman i am seriously offended. wtf lat.

I'd rather tell the truth: "I spent the last two years hitting refresh on the browser trying to be the first commenter on new ATL posts."

Under no circumstances should the person who sent that e-mail to ATL procreate. In fact, any one who is, will be or wants to be a lawyer should avoid having children. Consider it a service to all humanity.

The empirical evidence is the opposite: birth rates lag the Dow by roughly 9 months.

6 - See, I know some women who are comically offended. WTF is with you?

No. 7, It's not your browser. It's your 56K connection. - Firsties.

No. 3, nobody gives a shit.

I think the tone and the writing in this article, generally, is terrible. However, there is an uptick in the number of women in the mid-level and senior associate ranks having babies in my firm right now. It's a good time to be on maternity leave when things are less busy.

written like a true Singleton.

Having had a number of babies as a dad (in and out of wedlock - why do they call it wed "lock" anyway?), I can tell you that babies start costing you the moment they are born - and don't even try having one without insurance. I figure that each of my kids has cost me 250K, and they are not even in middle school yet.

this is a terrible post with so many things wrong I don't know where to start. Also, wtf with the tipster? "kids are cheap for the first few years of their life, so it's not as if people would be taking a huge financial hit to have the child." That is spoke by someone who has no idea wtf they are talking about (or doesn't live anywhere remotely near a big city). my daycare costs about the same as my mortgage.

Babies are "cheap"?? Clearly written by someone who has never had to buy a crib, clothes (that they grow out of in 5 minutes), diapers, wipes, and all the other baby accessories. And let's not even get started on the costs of daycare when you decide to re-enter the work force. And don't think you won't be penalized for having taken a "baby vacation."

I agree, back to the basics baby!

6 - The tipster who wrote in to ATL is a woman. Does that change things?

An awful lot of the young associates at my firm are pregnant. We've been joking that since we went from individual bottled water to water coolers it has to be something in the water

This post is offensive.

Please moderate.

God what a naive attitude. from a daycare/school perspective (which is by far the bulk of monthly expense) kids are MOST expensive at the beginning and then get slowly cheaper (at least until high school, and that depends on where you live).

This tipster's suggestion is not only offensive, it is so far beyond appropriate that that I would question his/her legal judgment as well. Someone should advise your tipster that some things are better left unsaid.

With no raise in sight (although job secure), currently hoping to get accidentally pregnant with boyfriend. What the hell - it will happen someday anyway.

I don't think this is offensive at all. It makes sense to me.

12 is right. It seems like all the women at my firm are on maternity leave right now.

"Leaving the workforce to be a stay-at-home dad, or to adopt and raise a child, has similar advantages."

FALSE

Seriously, as noted by others, it's not like babies are cheap. Cheaper than the future private school tuition in Manhattan? Sure. Cheap enough to pay for everything (assuming hubby has good insurance) with your unemployment check? Maybe. But they don't become free after 39 weeks.

Maybe this chiquita should talk to some *actual* parents before deciding it's so f'ing cheap and easy.

See, now I know why you're not a great lawyer -- the inability to think through the consequences of your actions. If you want a kid, fine, go ahead - there's never a perfect time and it's always tough.
BUT, if you think that your life gets easier with a kid, you are so very wrong (it might be massively rewarding, but it's not easy). A kid, at a minimum, will cost you $500k in the first 15 years. Marital satisfaction decreases for most couples. Sleep decreases, stress increases. Taking time off of work to "find" yourself isn't an option anymore. Everything centers around the kid, providing for it, its school schedule, etc. Having a kid solves a temporary problem with both a permanent "problem" and more of the weight on your or the father. Someone has to pay for the kid.

If you want to have a kid, do it. But don't do it because you think it will make your life easier. Explaining that you were part of a down economy is probably much easier than explaining to firms or companies in the future that you took time off before you really knew anything as a lawyer to have kids. All of the women I've known in biglaw have worked at least part time after the kid was born -- it's nowhere near as acceptable for those that have taken years off with children. Also, if you're taking time off before you're 9 months pregnant, that's also suspect - someone will likely be smart enough to realize that you were actually just unemployed for a while.

If you want to pursue a personal passion (like charity work) to take a break, I think that makes more sense.

I think this is a great idea. Kids aren't that expensive - every try hand-me-downs?

I don't think there would be day care expenses. I think what the tipster is suggesting is leaving the workforce for a few years to raise the kid (and maybe going back to work when the kid is old enough to go to school).

This is the best thing I have read on ATL in a while.

Tipster = embarassment to the female gender

I hope that Elie eats the placenta when his wife gives birth.

I got laid off from Biglaw and have been unemployed for 6 mos looking for work. During that time, my primary vocation has, I suppose, been as a "babymaker" or, more accurately, as a caregiver for my young children. It consumes my entire day and probably hinders my job searching and networking, but I have no alternative, since decent daycare for young children is so expensive. It's barely worth my time to take contract work or a low paying job to bridge the gap, since I would have to arrange a temporary childcare situation that in many cases would end up costing me nearly as much as I would be making in the temp job. I also can't really afford to go solo at this point because, again, I would have to start paying for daycare and wouldn't have any income initially to offset this expense, not to mention the usual start-up costs which I would have to dip into savings for...I could do it, but it doesn't seem worth it to go this route yet.

So yeah, I guess I am a "Babymaker" as far as my resume gap is concerned.

One interesting twist, I suppose, on my "Babymaker" status is that I made the babies by a sperm "donation" rather than by carrying and giving birth to them. Mom is currently the one who is supporting the family....

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28 - then who pays for your rent or mortgage? You can't consider staying at home "free" when you have a job or else you are entirely missing the point of opportunity cost and have no economic sense whatsoever

Baby lobsters are very expensive to raise too.

KH

This comment is neither here nor there, but I don't know how a creationist can look at a picture like that and not conclude that humans and chimps are descended from a common ancestor. That baby looks just like a little monkey.

Women like this should not be allowed to go to law school.

Women = baby making machines. Fact.

Why do women even bother going to law school and then take up spots in the workforce if all they are going to do is quit and have babies?

Women should just cut the b.s. and leave the real work to the men. There are plenty of kitchens and babies that need tending.

My parents referred to me as "the little abortion that got away." I had a rough childhood.

38. I really hope you are joking.

Btw, what is stopping the firm from laying you off while you are on the maternity leave?

22-

better "accidentally" find your way to an abortion clinic...

6 - shut up and just get to making babies

why is it acceptable for women to leave the workforce to care for babies but if a guy did it he would get the side eye?

You shouldn't have a child to get out of a crappy job anymore than you should have a child to save a marriage.

Fact is, a lot of women are doing this. Billable hours are hard to come by, and being out on maternity is a good excuse for low hours. Also, the women hope that by being in the protected class of being able to claim pregnancy, they will be spared from a layoff. The hope of the women in these situation is that the firm will instead fire someone who can't bring a FMLA lawsuit. They might be right about that.

BREAKING: Plaxico took a plea of 2 years in prison. Is Brafman still the top defense attorney in NYC?

It sounds ridiculous but the truth is a lot of women are considering it. At my summer associate position - small office (four girls one guy) - three recently married girls were considering this option. Two of the girls were seriously considering having a baby if we got deferred and one thought it wouldn't be a bad idea either if other factors didn't make impracticable. Sounds crazy but women put off having kids for a while when they start their legal careers and any gap in the career track is an attractive time for baby-making.

32 - yeah I had that same issue when I was laid off several months after the birth of my second child (i.e. beyond the 3 month FMLA timeframe). Had to pull the kids out of daycare, since couldn't afford it on unemployment, but that made job hunting difficult. Had to arrange for single day care when I had a job interview and my salary requirements had to exceed the cost of daycare plus unemployment plus transportation. Couldn't really do much face to face networking (and even phone calls were difficult with a noisy preschooler and baby).

But at least it did give me an excuse for the resume gap when I finally did land a job, and made it easier to bring up the topic that yes, I do have a family that I'd like to eat dinner with at least several times a week.

32 - yeah I had that same issue when I was laid off several months after the birth of my second child (i.e. beyond the 3 month FMLA timeframe). Had to pull the kids out of daycare, since couldn't afford it on unemployment, but that made job hunting difficult. Had to arrange for single day care when I had a job interview and my salary requirements had to exceed the cost of daycare plus unemployment plus transportation. Couldn't really do much face to face networking (and even phone calls were difficult with a noisy preschooler and baby).

But at least it did give me an excuse for the resume gap when I finally did land a job, and made it easier to bring up the topic that yes, I do have a family that I'd like to eat dinner with at least several times a week.

I hope all these babymakers realize how hard it is to re-enter the legal profession after taking a few years off to make babies. They will come back, if they are able to at probably 1/2 the salary.

There is nothing cheap about having children. They start out expensive, and become more so as time goes on.

Definitely something girls have in mind - 40% of our female associates got pregnant...

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Well, if you are going to be broke and unemployed, might as well have a baby to keep you company.

After all, misery loves company.

I am currently pregnant, but the timing is a coincidence -- we tried for years before conceiving. And frankly, having a baby right now -- when both my husband and I fear for our jobs -- would not have been our first choice. I shudder to think that there are people out there who think that all pregnant women are: (a) idiots; (b) trying to game the system; or (c) both. Thanks, "Tipster." I hope we never cross paths.

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Recession causes decrease in births...

http://www.ajc.com/news/nation-world/recession-means-fewer-110751.html

What's up with these ridiculous postings? We're in the midst of the biggest OCI slaughterings in history and you have yet to address it. C'mon, now!

50 - This article relates to attorneys considering having a baby as an excuse for being laid off or not finding a job in the first place. Of course there are securely employed female attorneys who take time off to raise a family, but they are not the focus of this post. It actually seems like a pretty logical and calculated decision to me. Are we sure that a man didn't think of it?

I had a friend who worked for several years at a biglaw firm that supposedly had a very "family friendly" environment. She worked her ass off and was planning to start a family when she and several other mid-level female associates in busy groups got axed. Bye bye 3 months maternity and health care benefits. Another female associate is on her third round of maternity leave. The firm doesn't dare fire her. Moral of the story - if you want to have a child, fuck the firm. They will find a reason to screw you over and no one in your class (male or female) is going to make partner anyway. Have the kids and start your family.

46,

Brafman made the best out of hopeless situation... Cutter and McCoy were out for blood from the beginning of this whole thing

Top 20 firms that have laid off the majority of first years in one office.

1) Latham

That is all

There is nothing cheap with having a baby. Have you priced diapers lately? Not to mention clothing, crib, changing table, baby items, stroller, car seats, etc. And what is it going to cost if your little "tax deduction" is born with birth defects or mentally or physically impaired? What if at age three you find out your child has autism?
I sincerely hope this woman doesn't have a colic baby because she will be up all night while the child screams at the top their lungs.
This woman needs a reality check. It is one thing to have a baby because you and your husband, or significant other, is ready for it. It is a whole another thing to have one so it appears getting laid off looks like you made that choice.

I had a business meeting at 1 Newark Center in the deplorable city of Newark, New Jersey this morning. I was finally able to confirm that the Seton Hall law school actually exists as it is adjacent to the building where I had my meeting. At first I thought the law school was a shopping center as it resembles a commerical mall. A few observations about the students I saw entering this cesspool: 1) attractive but clueless looking female students (obviously looking for husbands); 2) Cro-magnon type male students (don't be fooled by the size of their heads, bigger does not equal brighter); and, 3) I saw a man smiling with money falling out of his pockets. He was in his mid to late 40s and had gray sideburns. Would this person be the dean? If so, I would be smiling too after seeing what I saw.

60 -- "if you want to have a child, fuck the firm"? You want the firm to be the child's daddy?

And it sounds like your friends firm was very "family friendly." It kept a unproductive woman who was having babies over a more productive female associate that was waiting. Seems to be the definition of family friendly, in fact.

Notes From the Breadline: Baby Momma

i am willing to do my part to make babies. only attractive V-5, HYS women apply.

Of course kids are expensive if you're paying someone else to raise them. But if you're only seeing them 1-2 hours a day you can barely consider yourself a parent.

If one parent stays home with the children they really are cheapest when they're young. Just because you snob-asses elect to buy your babies fancy cribs and designer baby clothes doesn't mean that kids are expensive. I have 4 young children and they hardly add to my budget at all. They eat very little, they can get hand me down clothes from all of the other families with kids near the same age (or from thrift stores), and entertainment is CHEAP (the beach, the park, etc.).

If you're just going to pop out babies so the nanny can raise them, what's the f***ing point?

Just because you're too stuck up to save mony doesn't mean that kids are necessarily expensive.

The ship be sinking...

PE,

By "business meeting" you mean sexual rendezvous with Paula Franzese.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paula_Franzese

64:....and PE moves one step closer to outing himself.

PE - thank you for confirming that you are currently attending Seton Hall Law, a place that all of us agree is a shithole.

Will you still be posting after you finish SHL and step into the wonderful world of unemployment?

PS I dare you to not use the word "cretin" in your reply, since you are nothing without that word.

64, I don't know who you are, but i seriously doubt that you are a law firm partner (emerittus or otherwise). I can't imagine that someone of that stature would post that picture of themselves on this site or write your comments. You seem to post here very much, but I don't think that the picutre is you? So which is it?

PE: Ignore the haters/trolls. You are awesome and your comments hilarious. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I immediately scan all posts for your comments, and I guarantee that most other people here do the same. Chin up, pal.

42 - Your comment makes no sense. Tool.

I have to add to the chorus that BABIES ARE NOT CHEAP. If you're at home with them and don't have to spring for childcare, you still have diapers, doctor visits (even copays add up), clothes, food, lots of unexpected expenses ... and psychically they can take a toll in exhaustion, stress, the whole shebang. As someone with a young child who works in biglaw, I know of what I speak. The tipster REALLY seems to have no idea, so that part of her post was way off.

As for explaining a resume gap, well, having babies is one option. So is starting a new business, including a solo or small practice, so is getting out of law entirely for awhile - LOTS of us who try something new right now (babies or otherwise) will have a great excuse if we decide to go back to biglaw down the line. Babies = just one other thing.

So... if you want to have a baby and you're in a work bind, great. But to have a baby to EXPLAIN A RESUME GAP??? That doesn't sound like any kind of motivation to have a child aka to turn one's life upside down unless one is having a child because one wants to become a parent. Talk about messed up reasons to become a parent, absent true desire to become one.

I just returned from maternity leave only to have my salary disproportionately slashed compared to other similarly situated (but non-maternity-leave-taking) associates in my dept. Good times.

PS. Kids aren't cheap. The tipster is an idiot.

This comment is addressed to post no. 74.

The only way and time I get down is when I am at Rick's Cabaret, which is where I am heading to right now for lunch. Most of these cretins hope I am insecure but the bottom line is I am not bothered by their attempts to discredit me. For example, a poster now claims I am a student at Seton Hall. Let them believe that if it feeds their pitiful ego. Tomorrow I will be by Brooklyn Law School. Perhaps I will transfer by then.

PE = Former Seton Hall Summer at Orrick

Women are absolutely doing this, and in droves. Some women are not even waiting to get married/have a fiance/etc. before watering their garden. Seems to make the case for adding paternity leave (HA) or restructuring maternity leave as a no interest stipend payable upon return to work.

BTW: Ignore that economic data, as people without 100k+ jobs tend to have very different career and family priorities than most of the country.

@62. I've heard that many Latham first-years were laid off. I've also heard that many people died of the plague in 14th-century Europe. I'd appreciate a comparative analysis of the survival rates for these two events.

Thanks in advance.

PE = bike messenger for K&L Gates (located at 1 Newark Center)

This post is nothing without a pic of the tipster.

If you were already planning to have a kid in the near future, this is a great idea. Kids are expensive, true, but they'll be no less expensive in a couple years. It makes sense to take your maternity leave when the economy is in bad shape and there isn't a lot of work to go around. That sure beats having a kid in the middle of a legal boom.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090804/ap_on_re_us/us_fea_parenting_cost

ST. LOUIS – It's no secret that raising children can be expensive, but how about nearly a quarter of a million dollars expensive?

A government report released Tuesday says a middle-income family with a child born last year will spend about $221,000 raising that child through age 17.

The report by the USDA's Center for Nutrition Policy and Promotion identified housing as the largest single expense, followed by food and child care/education costs. The $221,000 in expenses rises to about $292,000 when adjusted for inflation.

USDA economist Mark Lino, who co-authored the report with Andrea Carlson, often hears people say children cost a lot when the annual findings are issued.

"I tell them children also have many benefits, so you have to keep that in mind," he said.

Families with more income spend more money on child-related costs, the report said. A two-parent family that earns less than $57,000 annually will spend about $160,000 on a child from birth through high school. Those with an income between $57,000 and $99,000 spend about $221,000 and those with higher incomes are expected to spend roughly $367,000 through age 17.

what a dumb cunt.

After reading just the headline, I thought this was going to be a post about female unemployed attorneys becoming pregnancy surrogates for money.

87

Me too, would have been much better too!

In my firm, it is the young male associates who are reproducing at a frightening pace. Nearly all of the 1st and 2nd year men are married with newborns. I'm pretty sure they are doing it for security reasons too, because they all bring their babies into work at least once and parade them around to all the partners they work for, as if to say "you can' t lay me off! I'm a family man! I have a wife and child to feed!" Meanwhile, the female associates wouldn't dare.

75....
perhaps I erroneously assumed that 22's attempt to "accidentally" get pregnant necessarily involved obligating some unwitting, non-consenting third-party (the boyfriend) for life. I figured the best response to what is obviously a joke about irresponsibly and cavalierly indebting a third party for life was a joke about cavalierly seeing that such an "accident" be rectified at the earliest possible juncture.

Of course maybe I'm wrong and 22 is just as naive, stupid, and inconsiderate as the original tipster.

42

For those looking for a little good news, Brown Rudnick has "un-deferred" some of its incoming associates. http://amlawdaily.typepad.com/amlawdaily/2009/08/hope-for-the-deferred.html

Woman are good for ass pounding, and not much more. As for babies, they won't happen so long as one sticks to ass pounding.

12 makes a good observation.

Right now is a good time to be expecting or on maternity leave to immunize yourself from any impending layoffs. Squeeze one out and live to fight another day, or at least until the next round of (stealth) layoffs after you come back.

If gamed correctly, one can avoid the chopping block for nearly a year.

42 & 90 - Clearly you need to get laid. Chillax, jeez.

I'm a first year associate and I start my maternity leave tomorrow! I hope that when I return after my paid leave the amount of incoming work will have picked up, and I have a good excuse for not having the greatest billables this year.

I'm a first year associate and I start my maternity leave tomorrow! I hope that when I return after my paid leave the amount of incoming work will have picked up, and I have a good excuse for not having the greatest billables this year.

I've put my career first for an extra 10 years, and now, in my late 30s, my husband and I are ready, but guess what, it's not taking. The prospect of paying for fertility treatments in this economy with only one of us working, and the elevated risk of having multiples, or a baby with a disability? Less than ideal. Ladies, don't wait til you are too old.

For all you naive parents to be, here's a list of things you didn't think cost a whole lot but actually do:

Formula - especially if you have to try 6 different types because your kid is allergic or spits it back at you the first 5 times
Diapers - especially when the jumbo pack you bought at Costco didn't fit because your kid just grew overnight
Baby toys - you will be amazed how quickly they go through these
Baby videos - for those moments when you need to prepare dinner and do things like bathing, crapping, etc.
Baby proofing your house - nuff said
Baby and kid furniture - ever buy a crib?
All those Mommy/Daddy and me classes - not for the baby, but for yourself so you don't go crazy not seeing anyone
Sports activities (starting at age 4) - don't get me started
Buying bigger house so your kid can run around safely and you don't go crazy in winter - every bedroom you need, estimate $250K to $500K more depending on where you live in the NE
Buying second car/minivan so your working spouse does not have to walk to train station (plus car seat costs)
Hiring baby sitter - so you and your spouse do not end up killing each other and can pretend that you still like each other
Saving for college
Doctor's visits and medication
Pre-school ($5K to $10K for part time - up to $25K for full time - BTW, this starts at age 2)
Extra plane tickets since you can't sit with a child on your lap for those 7 hour plane rides
Crib rentals etc at hotels

Yeah, some of these can be hand me downs, but you will find that the people who claim they spend $500 a year on their kids probably bathe once a month to save on their water bills.

Ha ha--"babies are cheap for the first few years," that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.

Tax deductions are nice, but guess what they won't cover your costs!

So I think the premise behind this post is that firms will eventually be back to being busy and need warm bodies again. And the question is whether these firms will prefer an associate who claims she quit her firm to be a full time mom (despite said firm allowing her to take 12-18 weeks of maternity leave and "part-time" after that -- remember your claim is you were a well liked employee so why wouldn't the firm have allowed that?) over someone like me about to be fired and only left his job when asked to. My firm is documented on Above the Law asking a large group to leave via stealth layoffs. I can point to trying my hardest to keep the job before being laid off, being on unemployment applying to jobs while being laid off (unemployment means I need money and am not independently wealthy or can live off of a spouse's salary), and the experience of not having had a job is both humiliating and ensures I will give 150% because I will appreciate the job much more than I did when I was wined and dined and told I was the greatest thing since sliced bread as a 2L.

Which one does the hiring partner want more? I'm biased but I think me and not the mom who could live off of the husband's salary and might be less willing to work 2000+ hours again.

Have the kid if you want to have a kid because there are more important things in life than career. I'm just saying it's not going to help your career because law firms are not family friendly unfortunately.

You idiots are missing the bigger picture. Pregnant women and new moms back from maternity leave are unfireable.

101 - um, no, they are not.

Not True- pregnant women and women returning from maternity leave are being laid off. I was laid off a month before giving birth --from a firm that was just listed in top 10 family friendly firms!

I want PE's baby.

Actually 100, the partner would want to hire the mom over you. Why? Because she will increase the firm's diversity numbers and serve as a "family friendly" face for the firm to bring in clients and women who have HYS credentials.

I managed to get my firm to pay for maternity leave, and then lay me off four weeks after I got back, leaving me to spend the remainder of baby's first year collecting unemployment. Go, me!!!

Latham's Silicon Valley office had a near 50% female associate pregnancy rate over the past two years. Also, Latham did not hesitate to lay off some pregnant and recently returned women. Per employment law, if you are doing a GREAT BIG layoff, and some of those laid off happen to be pregnant/on leave, then it's very difficult to prove that you were laid off specifically due to your status as expecting/on leave. Shockingly, Latham's employment law folks knew this and cut accordingly.

@ 73 - PE's picture is the partner of the law firm that Harrison Ford's character worked at in the movie Regarding Henry.

Moderator, please remove 86. Unacceptable.

I'm so glad I took my mat leaves while I was still at a big firm. Six months each, for a total of 12 months, most of which was paid through short term disability, state disability, vacation pay, and California's paid family leave program. What's more is that I did it back to back-- not on purpose, just happened. My last three years there, I was either out on leave or pregnant.

BUT . . . obviously, you should only have the kids if you really want them. Because a few years later, my Biglaw days are long over, and I've still got preschool, swim class, and light-up tennis shoes to pay for. Resume gaps are the least of our issues.

Are you out of your mind? Do you have any idea how mind-numbingly difficult it is to raise children, especially as a single parent? My children were both very much wanted, but now I'm a divorced single mom, I work full-time, my kids are teenagers and the top of my head is ready to blow off. Give me a break (or better yet, a Valium). If you need to take some time off, volunteer for the Peace Corps where you can do some good.

So, is it fair to assume that pregnant women and new moms currently on/returning from maternity leave are invincible to the stealth layoff, yet vulnerable as part of a mass layoff?

Note to self: this post is why women make horrible employees and, regardless of how "smart and accomplished" they are, should not be given jobs. Back to the kitchen!

Any man stupid enough to be married to a woman like this should save himself years of future pain and just blow his brains out, right now.

If I had my way, women with children wouldn't be allowed to work, period.

Women do this all the time...enter the workforce and feel like some real gung-ho, pantsuit wearing "warrior womyn," get burned out by the realization that it's not all cracked up to be..BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE! Despite being "equal," women get 10x more perks and prizes for being the weaker sex, so it is acceptable for them to drop out of the workforce, and then later bitch about how disadvantaged they are by being given the free choice to drop out of said workforce.

Most of them will never return, or will take on some cushy, PT job at a nonprofit or some nonsense. They will become bitter ex-career women who still fantasize about "being in the trenches." They will resent their husbands for "making me give up my career" and will proceed to henpeck and emasculate the shit out of him. Perhaps they will divorce the poor bastard and take all of his shit. He actually has money because he was slaving away to support your ass while you popped out kids and watched Oprah most of the time.

If they ever return to the workforce, they will get angry and blame their less experience and commensurate lack of pay on a "gender wage gap," and make up bullshit slogans like "equal pay for equal work," when it is clear that they have not been doing truly equal work.

Feminism is a joke and everyone knows it.
1950s housewives were 100x happier than the modern, cropped-hair, pantsuit wearing, wannabe men who bobble through the workplace like some kind of sick parody.

^yep, pretty much

FWIW I got stealth laid off this year from a top law firm after coming back from maternity leave. All of a sudden they felt there was no future for me at the firm - after years of great reviews and encouragement.

Pregnancy does probably give a mom some immunity from a stealth layoff for a while. If her reviews have always been good, it just looks really bad for a firm to suddenly decide that she's not up to snuff. Why risk the lawsuit?

Not suggesting this an appropriate reason at all to have a baby.

The idea that you can just decide to get pregnant and it happens right away is pretty amusing. As a married woman who is trying to conceive, let me say it can take a while. We're both relatively young (me 30, him 36) but after close to a year of no birth control, still no baby. If I were trying to save my career or job, time spent shagging would be better spent billing :)

Second the posters saying not to put it off. Fertility takes a nose dive after a while.

So your suggestion is to bring a child into the world, a human being who will live an entire lifetime every bit as important as your own (although you'll never give a damn because you only care about yourself and your career), whose sole reason for existing is because his soulless moron of a mother thought it would look good on her resume?

Sometimes I wonder if you Biglaw people are even human.

OR you could just multiply your salary ~130% by selling your eggs.

also, the benefits of pregnancy -- excuse for a resume gap, arguably protection from stealth layoff -- can be achieved absent the downsides (weight gain, future uncertainty/expense/etc associated with parenting): drop hints that you're pregnant, but DON'T ACTUALLY GET PREGNANT. duh. this is not flame; i have a close friend who successfully dodged a layoff of > 50% of her class/division (she's in banking, not biglaw) this way.

of course, the above doesn't necessarily apply to those women who want kids eventually anyways and figure now is just an especially good time since the opportunity cost of missing work is comparatively minimal. but i have nothing really to say to those women. kids are IMO almost always a bad idea.

114 - I smile every time I read your posts about women. One reason is that your posts are drafted specifically to try to make people feel bad, which I think is funny because it is so transparent.

The more significant reason is that I can tell that you'll never make partner. You don't think like one.

If you looked at your own self interest in this, you'd realize that you should be thanking your lucky stars that so many women go to work for law firms and then drop out to have kids and/or go in-house. This way, you have significantly less competition when time comes to make partner.

More importantly, those women who go inhouse become law firms' clients. They have much more flexibility than you think as to whom they call when they need outside counsel, and I'd be willing to bet a large amount of money that your world view leaks through to them and you won't be getting those calls.

The best part about it is that you're already doomed because of your hard wiring on this subject, so the fact that I've clued you in isn't going to help you.

What a terrible article. I was laid off during my third trimester, and it was anything but a fun "resume gap". There goes your maternity leave, not to mention the stress of having been laid off, paying the mortgage, finding another job while pregnant or waiting until you have the baby, etc. And at least at this particular big law firm, being pregnant did NOT make you immune from layoffs, stealth or otherwise. It made you even more attractive.

Is 114 an ironic parody of a sexist idiot, or are there really still people who think this way? I can't quite tell. And if you're serious and about to make some joke about how my feeble woman's brain can't comprehend it...I'm a man. And my "stronger sex" brain which does "work that isn't truly equal" can't comprehend the existence of a person who could make that post and be serious about it.

86 = nauseating that ATL leaves this demeaning sexist post up. The C word is as bad as the N word or the F word for gays. HELLO!? COME ON!

106 - You better be looking for a job, or that's fraud.

109 - Sorry, but you are textbook example of why it's hard for women of childbearing age to get hired and be taken seriously. I didn't even wear my wedding ring to the biglaw job interviews.

Dear David Lat:

Thanks for running this article on the same day my child and I got home from the hospital. It made me feel better about having a child in this economy. No really, it did!

How is this an alternative career? Is there another career women are qualified for?