Reversed Perk Watch: Soda Subsidy Slashed at Foley & Lardner
First they came for the Kleenex. Then they came for the coffee.
All around the country, law firms large and small are cutting costs by revoking perks. Today we heard from an unhappy camper — perhaps deprived of their customary caffeine? — at Foley & Lardner:
I can handle them taking away the Christmas party and giving us a 10% pay cut. But ratcheting up the cost of my soda by 150% is where I draw the line!
From an internal memo that went around this morning:
Vending machine prices - It has been several years since we last changed the price of beverages in the vending machines, yet our costs have increased steadily over those years. In order to bring the prices we charge in line with current costs, the price for soda and water will increase to $.75 and the price for juice will increase to $1.00. The new prices are still well below those found in public vending machines or stores, but will reduce or eliminate the need for the office to subsidize these items.
Frankly, we’re a bit puzzled. Isn’t it in Foley’s business interest to have well-caffeinated associates? Could the associates deprived of discounted Dr. Pepper have a Good Samaritan claim — oh, never mind….
The full memo — apparently there’s no such thing as a free lunch, at least at Foley & Lardner — after the jump.
FOLEY & LARDNER — MEMORANDUM — EXPENSE CONTROL MEASURES
In an effort to further control or reduce office expenses, the following changes are being implemented:
1. Vending machine prices - It has been several years since we last changed the price of beverages in the vending machines, yet our costs have increased steadily over those years. In order to bring the prices we charge in line with current costs, the price for soda and water will increase to $.75 and the price for juice will increase to $1.00. The new prices are still well below those found in public vending machines or stores, but will reduce or eliminate the need for the office to subsidize these items.
2. Attorney Luncheons - The full cost of the informal Friday attorney luncheons has also risen steadily, yet the attorney contribution has not changed since the inception of this program more than 5 years ago. Effective tomorrow, the attorney contribution will increase from $5.00 to $10.00. At this price, the office will still be subsidizing a significant portion of the actual cost of the food and we hope attorneys will continue to participate in these luncheons.
3. Overtime Meals - Effective Monday, the SeamlessWeb (formerly Osmio) meal ordering and delivery service will be terminated. The fees and ancillary costs associated with this program have simply become too costly. Overtime and weekend meals will continue to be reimbursed by the firm, but at the rates originally established prior to the Osmio/SeamlessWeb program - $10.00 for lunch and $20.00 for dinner. It will be necessary for you to order and pay for food on your own, and submit a request for reimbursement via an Expense Reimbursement Form (ERF) with receipts. The $10.00 and $20.00 limits.are inclusive of gratuities and delivery charges. Therefore, expenses beyond these limits will not be reimbursed.
Thank you in advance for your understanding and cooperation.
(122) 
Comments
Reading this makes me firsty!
You have to kick in cash for the attorney lunches? How déclassé....
No 1, these pretzels are making me firsty!!!
Not a Good Samaritan statute claim, but I imagine that Restatement of Contracts section 90 guy will have an opinion about the permissibility of raising vending machine costs after law students have agreed to work at F&L.
I am of the opinion that we should offer Red Bull and Spike instead of traditional colas. At $2.50 a pop, the firm may even turn in a profit.
Where's Elie?
Don't most firms have free soda for employees? All of the firms I've worked at do...
Only when you work in the mail room.
6 - he's stocking up as much soda in atl's office before the price goes up.
elie may as well get the donuts as well (cant blame you though as i love donuts as well).
I hear that Foley is now requiring all female employees under 35 to strip to their underwear twice daily so that the parnters can masturbate to them thus saving the partners the cost of hiring prostitutes.
I say its pure genius.
Lord Humongous demands you pay tribute to him!
$20 for dinner with tip, tax and delivery in NYC doesn't leave a lot of options. Of course in TTT offices it doesn't exclude many options....
Which is this post needs to tell us where Foley has offices. Hint. Hint.
9 - Say "as well" much? Perhaps it's all the free sodas you slurp.
Sounds like Seamless Web may go the way of the Dodo.
BIG DEAL...so they have to pay more for sodas and food. Somehow I think they can afford it. But watch out now...they might actually have to start bringing in their own food. What a novel idea.
-still unemployed
12, or you could pay for (a portion of) your meal with some dollars out of your own pocket. Shocking, I know. Kinda like how everyone else in NYC get food to consume for dinner, even those who don't make $600 per day.
We have vending machines at my firm, but if I want pop I just go to the main kitchen and pull some out of the fridge. The hostess always has plenty on hand there for getting conferrence rooms ready for meetings.
12 - Order a pizza or chinese. You don't need lobstah in your orifice for working overtime.
Damn 12, what kind of expensive taste do you have? My firm has a $20 dinner guideline for Seamless and I never have a problem staying under it.
Wow. $10 bucks contribution (which equals the overtime lunch reimbursement limit) to get to eat with your co-workers? Awesome.
This firm looks like it's in dire straits.
17 is getting fired. Or canned. (ba dum dum)
And your location is clear from the use of the word pop.
For those bitching about the increased costs of eating and drinking, Thompson Hine doesn't even subsidize anything.
Foley sucks. They are staffed by the laziest, most miserable aholes I have ever met in my life. It is a sad state of affairs that more Foley lawyers do not kill themselves, but rather force the world to continue to suffer their presence.
20 - Dire Straits....That Ain't Workin', that's the way you do it, get your money for nithing and your meals for free....
10, Masturbating over female biglaw associates - there is just no accounting for taste!
23 - So just when DID they fire you?
You can buy a 24 pack of soda for like $4 at the supermarket and just keep it in your office and then throw a few in he fridge each day. Lazy!
You can buy a 24 pack of soda for like $4 at the supermarket and just keep it in your office and then throw a few in the fridge each day. Lazy!
You can buy a 24 pack of soda for like $4 at the supermarket and just keep it in your office and then throw a few in the fridge each day. Lazy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCIT6h03fKA
Yeah, you can get a whole pack of Sam's Club Root Beer and swig it at your desk.
Overpriced twats to expect that your firm subsidize your unhealthy drinking binges.
All I want is a god damn liter of cola!
Farva
Until those nice sodas are stolen by quicker co-workers. Keep them warm and sock up on ice. Assuming it is still free.
12 - "which is why this post needs to tell us where Foley has offices" -
you're already on the freaking internet. hint hint.
It seems that the guys over at Foley & Lardner can't do math. If they've increased the price of your soda by 150% to $0.75, that means it used to be just $0.30. Highly unlikely.
26
Not fired. I never worked for them, and no, I never applied. But I do know some of them.
12
Their offices are in Milwaukee. $20 buys a lot in Milwaukee
23
35 -
Price of soda before increase = $0.50
.50 x 1.5 = $0.75
Do you see what they did there?
Never ceases to amaze me how this blog is on top of all the big breaking news. (Though you guys did miss the time they raised the price of the apples in the Morgan cafeteria 10 cents. That was pre-recession, but maybe was a sign things were headed downhill).
Wow, PE has my respect now. He knows of Spike.
Which office is this? All of them?
In Chicago, sodas used to be $0.25/can. Those were the glory days.
First they came for the tissues. I did not need to blow my nose so I said nothing.
Next they came for the coffee. I had caffeine pills so I said nothing.
Then they came for the soda. I had even stronger caffeine pills so I said nothing.
Finally they came for my job. I was then on meth so I grabbed the computer monitor and ran.
37, what's a 50% increase from $0.50? and what's a 150% increase?
Do you see the mathematical difference?
Soda went to 75 cents years ago. They've clearly been subsidizing the foolish soda swiggers for years. Of course, only retarded douchebaggios drink soda anyway.
We had our sodas taken away. They tasted so much better when they were free
37- really? that's a proof that a 150% increase of a .50 can of soda is .75?
tell me this, what what would be the cost if the increase of the .50 can of soda was just 50% instead of 150%?
lawyers.
12 - Maybe your ass wouldn't be the size of Texas if you didn't need more then $20 for dinner... Just sayin'
and 36 - they have office in DC and NY as well
Haynes and Boone in Dallas has fridges full of free cans of soda on every floor. Akin Gump in Dallas has free fountain drinks.
Any other firms do free soda?
37 - That would be an increase TO 150% of the prior price or an increase of the prior price BY FIFTY Percent. 35 is correct in that it said an increase BY 150%.
Now do you see what they did there? Well actually you don't; we only know that the tipster's description was probbaly off based on 35's analysis.
This comment is addressed to post no. 39.
Of course I know of Spike. I have the bartender at Rick's Cabaret mix it with Grey Goose and I am energized and ready for my private brand of entertainment at the VIP lounge.
47: yes.
37....first to accept a 150% pay cut
SODAmayor!!!
Who carries cases of soda to the office?
Anyway, just drink water. Or if you need caffeine, make an iced coffee.
Who carries cases of soda to the office?
Anyway, just drink water. Or if you need caffeine, make an iced coffee.
I lied, sodas died.
I'm Barack Obama?
Completely reasonable move. Not saying I would want it in my office, but if you have to cut expenses, this ain't a bad way to go.
PE, if you have not already read John Lanchester's novel 'The Debt to Pleasure,' I recommend it highly. I know you will appreciate it.
37=idiot. As is the tipster (not F&L) who brought up the "150%" figure. 42 and others explained why. It saddens me that so many lawyers have so little useful education. Percentages are elementary school mathematics, which should be fully mastered by junior high school.
10,
Have you seen the associates to whom you refer in your post?
23/36 - I see, so you're still bitter that they wouldn't even look in your direction during OCI. Let it go.
PE
I am a young female graduate who has been deferred by what is obviously not a peer firm. I am not law school hot, I am genuine hot. Perhaps you have a position for me. It is not necessary that I be called an attorney. Perhaps you could just give me something to "review." I would be willing to totally "sub"ordinate myself to you. I could be your ass istant or even just a secretary. If there is anything you could do for me, my joy, and appreciation , would know no bounds. (unless you are into that sort of thing.
Recent T10 grad
47-
Foley in Milwaukee has free fountain pop. Though based on this post, that may soon be changing...
Where the "ship be sinking guy"
Foley is the next to go. I don't think the seamless web or soda is gonna save more then 1 one job. The real issue is the client won't except the charges anymore.
"Pop"...lol
Is fountain pop like mountain dew?
61
Actually, what revs PE's motor is another man's schlong. So unless you can bring to the table a plastic or rubber facsimile, don't even bother to apply.
And be prepared for three ways with other pasty white elderly men where PE will pay more attention to the other guy than to you.
Does Latham still have its "pop key" - where lawyers could bypass the coin slot on the vending machine. Elitist? Yes. Predictable? Of course. Anybody want a free pop? Priceless.
who cares - i made law review
MysTTTal, can you do a post on firms that have eliminated toilet seat liners?
and all I wanted was a pepsi, and mom says, no, you're on drugs, and i said no, mom, i just wanted a pepsi, and she says, no, you're on drugs
Intervention and cold turkey is a lot cheaper than subsidizing someone's addiction to coffee or cola.
This follows PE's tough love package.
37 math fail, hahahahahah. always be damn sure you're right before you open your fat mouth
37 = fucking moron.
Yesterday soda at my firm was 60 cents a can. Today it is still 60 cents a can. In 37's world, this is an oppressive 100% price increase!
Shoot yourself, 37.
66 = humor fail
41=win
PE is a cock-watcher, though the point has been well made by others today.
The ship be sinking...
If people steal your soda in the fridge, buy a small mini fridge and keep it under or beside your desk. then you won't even waste time leaving your office to go get a soda.
77
Might as well install a stainless steel urinal in your office so that you can piss away all the sodas that you're drinking with that small mini fridge.
The partners and clients will be amazed and impressed at your office's minimalist steel chic.
Katten has free soda
78 is hilarious!
77
You miss the point about the space underneath your desk. That's where I go to take a nap.
78
No thanks. Your mom's mouth is a perfectly suitable receptical for my pee.
-77
77, 82
"receptical"?
And, what are you, 11? "Pee"?
And you wonder why you are permanently stuck in that contract attorney position.
78/83
I'm older than 11.
I'm also of the opinion that you drink soda with your mouth not refrigerators, and that "small mini" is redundant.
-77/82
41 - definitely made me chuckle. thx.
Lou's been losing at the track.
77/82/84
Let's pretend, for once, that you have some intelligence in that tiny brain of yours.
Look at the post immediately preceding mine and see where the "small mini" phrase came from.
As for your other "criticism," look up the phrase "literal" and "figurative" and determine which is which.
I trust you can open the dictionary despite the fact that you lack opposable thumbs?
61 here
I have now thrown myself at PE several times, offering my "services" for limited employment, yet have not heard back from PE. Clearly, this is undeniable proof that PE is gay. If he is willing to consistently shell out at Rick's Caberet for "look but dont touch" service, and not willing to look into me, clearly his frequent trips to Rick's are just to throw people off. Come out of the closet PE. Save your money. There is equality these days
86 - Very well played, sir.
Ehhh, then you-a ain't gettin no Coke!
This comment is addressed to post no. 88.
Quite frankly you are probably too young or too unsightly (as is the case with 99.99% of female attorneys) for my taste. I will pass on the offer. I was married for 37 years to a lovely lady. Unfortunately, I took myself out of the dating game in 1965. Yet I am a lady's man as many of the female entertainers at Rick's Cabaret can attest to. And if you think I am just an old man that drops a heavy coin just for looking at Rick's Cabaret, you are a really naive knave.
PE
88 here
"I was married for 37 years"
so you are no longer
And the action you get is paid for. And not really action.
But that is ok though. Im sure your ex is shacking up with a handful of junior associates who only perform the pity act for the ability to mock you behind your back
which office is this? sodas, waters, snacks, etc. are all free here
Who cares if soda is more expensive? The blowies are still free!
I don't understand why you don't understand ==> Latham laid off first year attorneys!
90: PE, the sheriff of Chilmark has a date with you. Be prepared to discuss the romp you took with the other pasty old white guy behind the dunes. This old bastard is now referring to you around Martha's Vineyard as his "bottom."
PE getting buggered on Martha's Vineyard??? Not a pretty image.
I heard a rumor that Lathan NY stopped giving free sodas earlier this year. Have they no shame?
Foley sucks my donkey dick
- 2 times says James.
Foley sucks my donkey dick
- 2 times says James
Foley sucks my donkey dick
- 2 times says James
Does Foley reimburse for attending Rick's Cabaret with PE?
I knew guys in high school who had to pay for their own sodas all the time. It was no big deal.
93 - Blowies are child's play. MFBJ's are where it's at. AND Foley has plenty of those for free!
100 - what's a dazzling urbanite like you doing in a rustic setting like this?
103 - you sound like an expert in both blowies AND MFBJs. And I'll bet you're smokin' hot. How 'bout you and I do some drinking and make some bad decisions?
104 - I'm smoking something. I'm in for the drinks and bad decisions. To be clear, Foley & Lardner WILL NOT pay for our drinks. Nor will it pay for our bad decisions; those are not official firm events. Other large law firms to follow suit...
Is this really newsworthy?
Who the heck cares about soda? (All I care about is the sweet, sweet nectar of the gods and no firm openly condones drinking that.)
To put the duelling mathematicians to rest: The price in vending machines at Foley's Chicago office was a quarter ($0.25). So an increase to $0.75 would be 200%.
#10
That is supposed be our secret--well I added Males to the list as well.
This is nearly as bad as when the firm stealthily
changed from double-ply to single-ply
toilet paper.
Sometimes life's essentials are not zero-sum games
Latham NY used to have $0.25 sodas, but then they went along and fired 45% of their associates. That is the only thing I miss about them.
Latham NY used to have $0.25 sodas, but then they went along and fired 45% of their associates. That is the only thing I miss about them.
At least Foley did not lay off associates. Rather have a job than paying more for soda.
61, 88 = PE
105 - I've heard that the nectar appears within the hallowed halls of Foley & Lardner LLP from time to time, but personally I'd rather have bewbs in my mouth.
113 - I've heard something attempting to be the nectar is appearing this afternoon around 4:30. Surely it will lead to something like bewbs in your mouth.
LOL! OMFG! BRB! ROTFL! HGUYTURJKS!(!!!!!!!!)
108 - at one Chicago biglaw shop they went from double ply to single ply at the same time they reduced water pressure in the bathrooms and switched to lower wattage fluorescents --- gotta keep it dusky for the screamin and reamin - don't squeeze the charmin' especially if you have a wide stance. Guess the firm and win a free roll.
108 -- I need TP for my Bunghole.
- Cornholio
My firm started using old drafts of briefs in place of TP. That helped avoid layoffs, but everyone started walking funny.
Foley doesn't even charge for soda or water in the West Coast office that I summered at. This post is nonsense. Rather than using this as an indicator for firm health, why don't you look to the fact that the only first years that Foley cut were those who failed the bar TWICE (there were 2 firmwide)?! That fact should set the Latham trolls off.
Maybe times have changed, but I spent years with Foley and the whole time the only complaint on this subject was that the abundance of free food, snacks, soda, etc.,was a constant dietary challenge. Maybe this varies greatly by office.
#41 was the funniest thing I've read in a while.
I worked there for 8 years (not as an attorney). Their soda costs were .25 the entire time of employment. In some offices, it was free.
They have offices all over the country, including New York, Boston, Orlando, Tampa, Chicago, Madison, San Fran, LA, etc. NOT just in Milwaukee.
Foley & Lardner is a sinking ship! Management committee continues to collect their milllion dollar salaries while demanding that attorneys charge outrageous rates for their services. No one in Milwaukee will agree to the new rates--so loss of many clients and billable hours. Good long time partners advised no rate increase. Management did not listen, but continues to get BIG salaries that they vote themselves to get. They are leading a sinking ship. Farewell F&L, it was great when we last knew you!