Can you imagine rolling on your parents in an attempt to get out of a drug conviction? What if your parents were both attorneys? According to the Boston Globe, one kid attempted to throw his cool sounding parents right under the bus:
Two prominent attorneys are under police scrutiny after their son, arrested on charges he was dealing marijuana from home, told investigators his parents knew what he was doing. Police found a small smoking pipe, scale and baggies in their bedroom.
Jonathon Cook, 20, said his stepfather, Suffolk University law professor Timothy Wilton, helped him build a place to grow marijuana in exchange for some of the profits and also smoked it in the house, according to a police report.
He said that his mother, Kathy Jo Cook — the former president of the Women’s Bar Association of Massachusetts — also knew about the drug activity and frequently complained that her husband’s smoking left the house smelling like marijuana, authorities said.
Let me get this straight. Instead of beating you like a red-headed step child your stepdad actually helps you grow weed. Your mom isn’t happy about it but allows it to continue. And you — snot-nosed 20-year-old asshole that you are — rat them out for it? What kind of world are we living in?
His parents deny all of the allegations.
It is of course entirely possible that Jonathon Cook simply made this all up, which makes him a bad son and a terrible liar.
A female associate at a large law firm recently sent us a message along these lines (we’ve tweaked and paraphrased her original email in places):
In these tough economic times, people are (1) having trouble finding jobs as they come out of law school, (2) recently laid-off, or (3) miserable in the jobs they still have, given how low morale is and how many hours they’re expected to work now (given the “be grateful for your job” mentality).
People in such situations are often unable to make a change, given how few jobs there are out there and how much competition there is for them. But they’re scared to just up and quit, because very few employers would actually buy that they had resigned and not been fired.
What’s a girl to do? Make babies. That’s what.
Making the case for making babies, after the jump.
Yesterday we told you about the firm Trial Lawyers For Justice asking job applicants to send in some non-standard information. Among other things, the firm asked potential employees to send in a family photograph.
We asked Nick Rowley — who wrote the ad asking for applicants to send in their personal story and political beliefs along with their picture — to explain how these factors affect his decision making process for new hires.
He furnished Above the Law with a full response. We’re publishing it full after the jump. Let Mr. Rowley know if you agree with his reasons in the comments.
* Texas judge Sharon Keller (a.k.a. Sharon ‘Killer’) faces possible removal from office for denying a death sentence appeal because she needed to go home early. She has testified though that she would not do anything differently if faced again with a similar situation. That must have been a life-or-death repair job. [New American]
* Eleven lucky Brown Rudnick first year associates have been un-deferred. [National Law Journal]
* Paris Hilton wins her suit. Judge disses her movie. [Popeater]
* UPS got a special delivery yesterday: a $100 million lawsuit for not paying overtime. [Associated Press]
* Unspam Technologies has filed a lawsuit to find out which banks are vulnerable to hackers. [New York Times]
* Doctors in Oklahoma no longer have to administer an ultrasound before an abortion. [Washington Post]
Yesterday, the Vault rankings were released. It is time to dig into them.
To refresh your memory here are the top five firms according to Vault:
1. Wachtell 2. Cravath 3. Skadden 4. Sullivan & Cromwell 5. Davis Polk
As we noted yesterday, the only change in the top five is Skadden jumping over S&C. Is that fair? A lot of you opined that Skadden’s prestige score was settled before it starting deferring associates. But surprisingly few of you noted that Skadden paid out bonuses that were double what Cravath, S&C, and DPW paid.
Is twice as much bonus money worth one extra spot in the rankings? Vault’s managing editor, Brian Dalton, suggests that Skadden’s bonus carried some weight:
Skadden had a good year, climbing over Sullivan & Cromwell to take the #3 spot. Among other factors, the notion of ‘half-Skadden’ is a potent one, though not quite enough to carry the firm past Cravath. (Mildly ironic in that Cravath’s bonus decision spawned that meme.)
Truly striking is the reach of the Skadden brand: Third in the Boston regional ranking, second in Chicago, and–taking over from Latham–No. 1 in Northern and Southern California. (Vault’s regional rankings are calculated using only the votes of the survey respondents in the particular region.) By contrast, in its hometown of New York City, Skadden places fifth. (These regional rankings are coming soon to the site.)
After the jump, should any of these firms in the top five move over to make room for somebody else?
* I wonder if Harvard understands that when it does things like open up its own disgustingly preppy clothing line, it makes it far more likely that random strangers will throw unpleasant inanimate objects at me and my friends? [The Faculty Lounge]
* Is Biglaw turning into Bifurcated law? [Ideoblog]
* Depositions 101 in the age of Web 2.0. [What About Clients?]
* Would you encourage your child to become a lawyer? [Lawdragon]
* Suburban law is sprawling. [Young Lawyers Blog]
* They’ll be teaching the Bible in public schools in Texas this fall. That sound you just heard was the Devil celebrating another victory over the forces of religious tolerance. [Quiz Law]
When a group of Facebook users sue Facebook for invasion of privacy, it really gives you hope that the legal profession will come out of this recession stronger than ever. The ability of Americans to turn fear and an incomplete understanding of what they signed up for into a full blown lawsuit is like renewable energy to American lawyers.
As Kash explains on True/Slant, it is really quite easy to get some people to join a legal crusade:
Are you vaguely uncomfortable with Facebook? Something doesn’t feel quite right with the way it handles privacy issues, right? You can’t quite put your finger on what bothers you exactly about handing all of your photos, personal information, videos, friends, and status updates to one corporate entity for indefinite storage, but yeah, there’s something messed up about it.
If the above resonates with you, you should try to join one of the latest legal actions against the social networking company.
10:14: Who the hell is Benjamin Cardin (D-MD)? So far I’ve learned that he’s an Oriole fan, and Wikipedia tells me he beat now-Republican Chairman Michael Steele for Senate in 2006. I want Tommy Carcetti to be asking these questions!
But his nephew, attorney and Baltimore County state delegate Jon S. Cardin, is a man who knows how to make an impression. The Baltimore Sun reports:
City police are investigating why on-duty marine and helicopter officers helped a Baltimore County state delegate propose to his girlfriend by pretending to raid a boat the couple were aboard, a department spokesman said Monday.
Officers boarded the boat, owned by a friend of Del. Jon S. Cardin, Aug. 7 in the Inner Harbor. As the helicopter Foxtrot hovered overhead, adding to the sense of tension, one report says officers pretended to search the vessel and even had the woman thinking she was about to be handcuffed before the delegate got on one knee and proposed.
Yes, the fear of getting apprehended and incarcerated is really what marriage proposals are all about. But for some reason, Baltimore officials don’t understand that asking a girl to marry you without the imminent threat of state action is so 2007.
It’s time for some good ol’ fashioned ass covering, after the jump.
On Monday, the Supreme Court ordered a federal trial judge to take a closer look at the murder case against Troy Anthony Davis, a Georgia death row inmate. The SCOTUS directed the district judge to “receive testimony and make findings of fact as to whether evidence that could have been obtained at the time of trial clearly establishes [Davis'] innocence.”
Justice Antonin Scalia, joined by Justice Clarence Thomas, dissented. Justice Scalia questioned the viability of Davis’s claim of actual innocence, then went one step further. Even if Davis might be “actually” innocent, he’s SOL:
This Court has never held that the Constitution forbids the execution of a convicted defendant who has had a full and fair trial but is later able to convince a habeas court that he is “actually” innocent.
This bold pronouncement caught the attention of Professor Alan Dershowitz, back at Justice Scalia’s alma mater, Harvard Law School. From “Scalia’s Catholic Betrayal,” over at The Daily Beast:
Let us be clear precisely what [Scalia's dissent] means. If a defendant were convicted, after a constitutionally unflawed trial, of murdering his wife, and then came to the Supreme Court with his very much alive wife at his side, and sought a new trial based on newly discovered evidence (namely that his wife was alive), these two justices would tell him, in effect: “Look, your wife may be alive as a matter of fact, but as a matter of constitutional law, she’s dead, and as for you, Mr. Innocent Defendant, you’re dead, too, since there is no constitutional right not to be executed merely because you’re innocent.”
It would be shocking enough for any justice of the Supreme Court to issue such a truly outrageous opinion, but it is particularly indefensible for Justices Scalia and Thomas, both of whom claim to be practicing Catholics, bound by the teaching of their church, to do moral justice. Justice Scalia has famously written, in the May 2002 issue of the conservative journal First Things, that if the Constitution compelled him to do something that was absolutely prohibited by mandatory Catholic rules, he would have no choice but to resign from the Supreme Court.
So should Justice Scalia resign? The Dersh isn’t saying that — yet.
But he does have a challenge for Nino.
This past weekend we spent some time in Charlotte, North Carolina, where the houses are big (compared to Manhattan apartments), the downtown is small, and lawyers make time for inspirational lunches with school children. Or so we read in the Charlotte Observer:
It’s not every day that an eighth-grader gets to sit down to lunch with a lawyer, but it happens once a month for nearly 80 Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools students.
CMS’ “Lunch with a Lawyer” program helps middle schoolers who are interested in law careers learn more about the profession by getting to know a lawyer.
The article offers a refreshing take on why people become lawyers. See your profession through the eyes of 12-year-olds, after the jump.
Name partner Jerold Oshinsky is leaving Gilbert Oshinsky for Jenner & Block’s Los Angeles office. Gilbert Oshinsky will now be known as “Gilbert LLP.” According to the firm’s press release, long distance relationships aren’t easy for law firm partners either:
Founding partner and chairman Scott Gilbert announced today that Jerold Oshinsky is leaving the partnership to join the Los Angeles office of Jenner & Block, where he will concentrate on policyholder work and expand Jenner’s West Coast practice. The DC-based law firm’s name will be Gilbert LLP, and the firm will continue to serve its West Coast and other clients from its Washington DC headquarters. “Although our firm has active litigation and other business in most regions of the United States, including California, virtually all of our lawyers are headquartered in Washington, DC. Jerry and we found that, notwithstanding our mutual best efforts, this long-distance relationship was not practical for either of us.”
When Above the Law talked with a spokesperson for Gilbert, the firm again emphasized Oshinsky’s desire to build up his west coast practice. The spokesperson said that there was a logistical issue. Oshinsky’s family lives in L.A. and he didn’t want to continue going back and forth from the west coast to Gilbert’s headquarters in D.C.
Oshinsky will be the only Gilbert lawyer making the move to Jenner & Block.
Oshinsky joined Gilbert just this past October. The move to Jenner ends the delightful firm name abbreviation Scott Gilbert highlighted when Oshinsky came to the firm in October:
[A]s soon as Jerry is able to join the partnership, the firm will be changing its name to Gilbert Oshinsky LLP. This name best reflects our new, or in some cases reestablished, relationship with Jerry, as well as the merger of our two substantial practices. And yes, on several levels, we henceforth will be known as the GO to firm.
It was fun while it lasted.
Read the full Gilbert press release after the jump.
On Monday, SCOTUS ordered a federal judge to consider an innocence claim by death row inmate Troy Davis. The case has sparked serious media coverage.
It has also inspired some not-so serious media coverage. Were SCOTUS to take on the legality of the death penalty, the Onion News Network imagines how each Justice would approach the case:
Ed. note: Welcome to the latest installment of “Notes from the Breadline,” a column by a laid-off lawyer in New York. Prior columns are collected here. You can reach Roxana St. Thomas by email (at roxanastthomas@gmail.com), follow her on Twitter, or find her on Facebook.
After months of ceaseless rain, August descends languidly. As it wraps the city in its sweaty fist, the prevailing complaint of New Yorkers shifts seamlessly from “When will the sun come out?” to “I’m hot!” Tourists wrinkle their noses at the smell of ripening garbage on Broome Street, and my super takes up a shirtless vigil on the stoop outside our building. At night, the tables outside of neighborhood cafes fill with wilted hipsters, their carefully disheveled hair drooping damply.
“It’s 300 degrees outside,” my friend Bo announces one day on the phone. I am lying on the floor, watching the ceiling fan turn and thinking about the movie Casablanca, in which people managed to maintain their dignity despite heat and oppressive sartorial conventions. “It’s not so bad,” I say absently, watching the cat, who is attempting to drink out of his water dish without standing up. After a moment, he gives up and flops listlessly onto his side.
“Easy for you to say!” Bo snorts. “You don’t know what it’s like to have to dress up in a suit in 300-degree weather.”
I sit up, covered in cat hair, which has adhered itself to my sweaty clothes. I am like a human ice cream cone, I think, topped with particularly unappetizing sprinkles. It occurs to me that I have heard the sentiment that Bo is expressing – the assumption that I am unable to relate to the lives of working folk – several times since this heat wave started.
“Hmphf,” I say indignantly. “I remember exactly what it’s like to wear a suit to work when it’s 300 degrees out. Just because I’m not working right now, it doesn’t mean I can’t relate.”
Despite my protestations, however, I am secretly delighted. I have, I realize, discovered the silver lining in this storm cloud: I may be jobless and increasingly broke, but let’s face it — here in the breadline, every day is casual Friday.
I decide to pay a visit to Lat (who has been busily posting pictures of his sweaty visage on Facebook). I also suspect that his office is cooler than my apartment. At the very least, I can count on a chilly reception from the Fashionista staff, who regard my inelegance with mortified pity.
I arrive to find Lat stalking crabbily around the office with a watering can, looking harried. “What’s the matter?” I ask, flopping into a chair.
“Ugh,” Lat says irritably. “Elie went on vacation and left me to take care of his donut plant.” He pulls out a pair of pruning shears and begins to trim donut holes from its drooping branches. “I have a lot to do, and I’m really not in the mood to garden.”
“What can I do to help?” I ask, filling a cup from the burbling coffee fountain.
We all know that it is difficult to get a job in this legal market. But an advertisement posted on the Minnesota state bar website makes it look like we are just one step away from genetic testing for junior associates. At least in Iowa.
The request for new talent starts off very earnestly:
DECORAH, IA plaintiff firm is seeking a brilliant hardworking lawyer who would rather do research and writing than be in court. Firm practices catastrophic injury, medical malpractice, and wrongful death and is seeking a lawyer licensed or in the process of becoming licensed in Iowa and/or Minnesota willing to get licensed in both with a possibility of Wisconsin and California, who is willing to relocate to Decorah, IA. Position will be handling of the firm’s law and motion, discovery, legal research, and appeals (to work 50 hours per week, full time inside the office to prepare the firm’s trial lawyers who travel and spend most of their time in court). One month paid vacation per year, salary is negotiable and commensurate with experience and qualifications, the firm may be willing to provide housing in Decorah, IA. Writing samples, resume, and examples of briefs and projects worked on is required.
But then this plaintiff’s firm ad becomes … kind of creepy:
Much thought is going to be put into who will fill this very important position with the firm. Persons who are interested are requested to email a personal story of who the applicant is, what his or her political beliefs are, and what they believe about justice and personal injury litigation along with a recent personal and/or family photograph.
Political beliefs? A family photo? You know, this is one time where a little “X law firm is an equal opportunity employer …” tagline would be comforting.
What law firm put this advertisement together? Details after the jump.
* If you’re wondering how Ted Olson wound up representing the plaintiffs in a case challenging California’s ban on same-sex marriage, read this. [New York Times]
* An Oklahoma judge strikes down, on state constitutional grounds, an Oklahoma law requiring ultrasounds before abortions. [Washington Post]
* Microsoft seeks Federal Circuit permission to keep selling Word software, despite an unfavorable ruling. [AP via How Appealing]
* Justice Sotomayor casts her very first SCOTUS vote, dissenting in a death penalty case. [New York Times]
* A reality show contestant is named a “person of interest” in the investigation of a 28-year-old swimsuit model’s death. [Los Angeles Times]
* A Massachusetts man served 22 years on highly questionable child molestation charges; the prosecutor, who “likely engaged in serious misconduct and open bigotry in winning his conviction,” has never been held accountable (and still sits as a judge). [Reason]
The world of contract attorneys isn’t our primary focus around here. We make occasional forays into that territory, but for the most part we leave it to more specialized sites, like Temporary Attorney (aka Tom the Temp).
If the temp-attorney world is your cup of tea, however, then check out this interesting new site, which several ATL readers have emailed us about: Big Debt, Small Law. We reached out to Law Is 4 Losers — the angry author, who still works as a contract attorney (he just finished a New York project for a large national law firm) — and asked him about the site’s origins. He explained:
I was prompted to start the blog for two reasons. First is the membership solicitation from the ABA asking me for $250 in dues and listing all the wonderful things that they’ve been doing of late to “improve” this profession (curiously, outsourcing my job to India via ethics opinion 08-451 was not among them).
Another reason was my recent NYS Law license renewal of $350. There was no waiver provision or extension for unemployed lawyers. [W]e contract attorneys have to pay health insurance, bar dues, CLE fees, and other obligations out of our own pocket. And at the $28 an hour straight-time now offered by NYC Biglaw (or the $40K small firms are paying), this is a hell of a lot of money. Forcing people to choose between their rent and their job is unconscionable….
I hope to warn incoming One L’s and prospective law students about the reality out there behind the slick admissions brochures and silver-tongued charlatan deans who will lie thru their teeth to get their hands on that Sallie Mae loan money. I’d also like to lobby the state bars to offer fee waivers or extensions on dues to unemployed lawyers who can prove financial hardship.
If you’re an associate and feeling sorry for yourself, perhaps because your pay has been cut or layoffs are taking place at your firm, Law Is 4 Losers doesn’t want to hear it:
Bad as things are for associates, they are 100 times worse for doc reviewers. We’ve been losing jobs every few weeks or months ever since leaving law school, having no “careers” to speak of, and also no health insurance, severance, or savings.
His most recent blog post — deeply depressing, but scabrously funny — describes the misery of temping at two of Biglaw’s biggest names: Paul Weiss and Sullivan & Cromwell. And he doesn’t pull his punches.
* Jenny from the block and Sonia from the block, breaking bread. [US Magazine]
* A 6-2 decision in a death penalty case is a bit surprising for the Roberts Court. [True/Slant]
* The pros of going to law school when you are 19. [Anonymous Lawyer]
* Some people won’t give Bob Novak a break, even in death. [Law and More]
* Do email addresses really have a stigma? I guess I’m glad I canceled my CompuServe account. [Let's Talk Turkey]
* What idiot gave Michael Jackson’s doctor the keys to the internet? [Popsquire]
* I think the last thing my father said to me when he dropped me off at college was something like, “No, you guys can keep the liquor. But after that, you guys are on your own, so I suggest you make some friends.” This is more touching. [Tax Prof Blog]
The complete, official list of Supreme Court clerks for October Term 2009 — i.e., the clerks who recently arrived at One First Street — will be released by the Public Information Office shortly, perhaps by the end of this week. We’ve previously listed many of the Court’s OT 2009 law clerks in these pages.
But we didn’t name all of them. Our list didn’t include the hires of newly confirmed Justice Sonia Sotomayor. We understand that Justice Sotomayor has hired all of her clerks for OT 2009 — which makes sense, since she has a lot of work to tackle before the official start of the Term — but no clerks yet for OT 2010. Her OT 2009 clerks started working at the Court yesterday.
We think we know three out of four of them — but we’re not sure. We also have some info about Justice Clarence Thomas’s clerk hiring, but we need to fill in some blanks.
Can you help us? UPDATE: We think we have all four Sotomayor clerks now. ¡Gracias!
In 2009, a small group of Harvard Law School students noticed an absurd monopoly in the bar prep space, held by an unchallenged leader with a non-evolving product. In response, these students teamed up with Harvard Law alumni to launch BarMax on January 14, 2010.
The mission: democratize bar prep by embracing new technologies to provide the very best bar exam review courses at a fraction of the cost normally associated with these courses.
Since then, with the encouragement of thousands of students and an unwavering commitment to their success, BarMax has established itself as a comprehensive alternative to the stagnant, over-priced status quo.
As we continue to expand, we do not want to lose sight of the basic premises that led us to create BarMax in the first place. If you are a law student who believes that there is something fundamentally wrong with being forced to take out yet another loan to pay for a $4,000 bar exam prep course, you are not alone.
Ed. note: This post is authored by Evan Jowers and Robert Kinney of Kinney Recruiting, sponsor of the Asia Chronicles. Kinney has made more placements of U.S. associates and partners in Asia than any other firm in the past five years. You can reach them by email: asia@kinneyrecruiting.com
Happy Chinese New Year! We were extremely busy the past few months, including most of our US based team working from our Hong Kong offices during November and December.
As a follow up from our recent post, which listed our 62 US associate and counsel placements in Asia last year (vast majority in HK / China), please note that thus far in January ’12, we have already made seven US associate and counsel placements in Asia. This is an especially impressive number, considering the biglaw lateral hiring market in Asia is down right now (see state of the market brief overview below). These new placements are of new hires in Hong Kong, Beijing and Shanghai, who were interviewing with their new firm for a month or more and they are spread out among different practice areas, including project finance, litigation, fund formation, M&A and cap markets. We are close on four additional new associate placements, in Hong Kong, Tokyo and Shanghai, that we expect to close soon. We do not discuss partner placements in these articles, but the pace of partner recruitment in Asia (a large part of our business) has continued.
Hedge Fund In-House Openings in Hong Kong
We are seeing a small run of new in-house openings in Hong Kong at hedge funds. We are currently filling three different in-house positions at three different hedge funds in Hong Kong, two of these searches we are handling on an exclusive basis. All three will most likely be filled by a US associate, with about 4 to 6 years of experience. Mandarin not required. Candidates from NYC and London will be considered, but at one of these funds the new hire will likely come from Hong Kong / China or Singapore (with HK being the strong preference).
Please feel free to reach out to us at asia@kinneyrecruiting.com if you are interested in these hedge fund openings. As you probably would expect, the competition for these spots will be fierce and the funds will be very selective when choosing which candidates to interview.
Can you imagine rolling on your parents in an attempt to get out of a drug conviction? What if your parents were both attorneys? According to the Boston Globe, one kid attempted to throw his cool sounding parents right under the bus:
Continue reading “The Ungrateful Tattletale”
In these tough economic times, people are (1) having trouble finding jobs as they come out of law school, (2) recently laid-off, or (3) miserable in the jobs they still have, given how low morale is and how many hours they’re expected to work now (given the “be grateful for your job” mentality).
A quick word of thanks to this week’s advertisers on Above the Law:
On Monday, the Supreme Court 
* If you’re wondering how Ted Olson wound up representing the plaintiffs in a case challenging California’s ban on same-sex marriage, read this. [
The world of contract attorneys isn’t our primary focus around here. We make 
The complete, official list of 
