first to say shapiro howard sucks

first to go away

I didn't think Bryan would cave, but they did.

Latham did this months ago

Take the money. You're going to get rescinded anyway.

2011 is 16 months away. At this point, just take the money and tell the firm to go fuck itself.

It's just cruel at this point.

Here is a tip for the deferred (i.e., peons that have been declared persona non-grata at the firm), take the payoff money, hang a shingle and then pay an orderly at your local hospital for some useful "tips."

First to say Partner EmeriTTTus sunks donkey nuts. No seriously, ask Rick.

8, here's a tip. Concentrate on your OCI interviews and get the fuck off of ATL. You post on here over 20 times a day. You have absolutely NO LIFE!!

Suggestion: Create two ATL sites. One for the big boys and another - Junior ATL - for small firms in small cities. Hate to sound like a snob, but I don't come to this site for stories about some firm I've never heard of. The new site could be called Below the Law or Below Above the Law.

If these mongrels had applied themselves in life and particularly in law school, they may have had a shot at a meaningful offer from a preeminent peer law firm. Instead they will be handing me warm towels as I exit our firm's water closet.

Incidentally, I was born into excessive wealth and have an outstanding offer at my father's preeminent peer law firm.

8 still has the touch, 12 made a nice niche for himself. Kudos, gentlemen.

How much are we all convinved that Partner and Jake Emeritus are one and the same person?

Both are douchey and not even remotely intersting or funny.

I hear they are offering additional stipends of up to $300 for the Associates not to urinate on the tolet seats. Any truth to that?

So I could pay off all my law school loans without ever having to set foot in biglaw?

SIGN ME UP

I hear they are offering additional stipends of up to $300 for the Associates not to urinate on the tolet seats. Any truth to that?

11--do you post this every time someone isn't talking about layoffs at NY firms?

8 = 12 = 13.

As the great Steve Miller once said:

"Go on take the money and run"

Mystal was offered cupcakes.
He accepted the offer.

11,

You are a snob. Here's a suggestion: when you see the name and logo of a firm you never heard of, don't read the post...retard.

14:

You're a moron. They're pointing out the absurdity of privileged douche bags disparaging poor and less educated people--even when the former became that way through birth.

Jake Emeritus and Partner Emeritus--THANK YOU.

WTF? Why pay them anything?

is there any estoppel argument that could be made? sec. 90?

11, have you heard of Pillsbury? Yea? Well, this "no name" firm just outdid that firm by 10 k, so STFU. And if you haven't heard of Pillsbury, are you suggesting that ATL cover like 10 firms? Idiot.

Emertius people, don't mind the haters. They don't understand irony. or wit.

23, you are obviously the law student know as PE. Also, I bet your dick is small and flacid at all times.

Please go get a girlfriend of a life.

Who wants to have some sex and a Fresca later?

Heaving Cleave

$60,000 for doing nothing? Sign me up!

11--I hope you enjoy your 3-4 years of servitude in NY before being pushed to the curb. The rest of us will enjoy a career and a life.

18, no, I suggest it every time there's a post about no name firms.

22, that's what Below the Law is for-- all junior firms.

26, wtf does this have to do with baked goods?

-- 11.

It's amazing that so many businesses (law firms) have to do this. It goes to show how retarded so many partners are and how completely lacking in basic business acumen they are. Having worked at an AM law 100 firm I was amazed at the partners' lack of business skills and foresight - even if they were good lawyers.

The problem as I see it is that lawyers are not business people. They generally do not know how to run a business. Also, the ones who make the money are frequently too busy making money to bother with many of the business issues and the ones with the time aren't listened to because they clearly aren't bringing in clients and hence don't have any power. Ah law! Good times.

Wow PE has already posted? I was going to do a PE impression - "blah blah hybrid tough love package, non-peer firm, foreign attorneys, commisar o'bama, cretin, Rick's, blah blah"

There has to be an "automated PE comment" machine that combines all of the above and spit that crap out in random order for every ATL article.

24, 30, and other morons -

If a team signs up an athlete then tells him to stay home and not show up to practice or games then releases him, should the team pay nothing?

These associates want to work, and they passed up other opportunities. There ARE firms that are welcoming associates this fall.

I interviewed with Bryan Cave and felt really great about my interview. Nobody has heard back about callbacks yet, but this makes me optimistic.

11-as I said enjoy your 3 or 4 years with your prestigious firm doing document review, wondering what a client looked like and then hoping there is a job for you somwhere when those 3 or 4 years are finished.

Soon to be laid off lawyers @ Bryan Cave

A friend, let's call him "Rick", has asked me to represent him in a suit he wishes to file against a partner at a major law firm, let's call him "PE", for sexual assault last night.

I cannot take the work, because my firm does not allow partners to sue other partners, and this type of case is "above" my lover AM Law 200 law firm.

But I am told the sexual assault happened several times per week for the last few years, and there are some witnesses to the sexual assault.

Any takers?

Bryan: Please, please, please listen! I've got one or two things to say.
The Crowd: Tell us! Tell us both of them!
Bryan: Look, you've got it all wrong! You don't NEED to follow ME, You don't NEED to follow ANYBODY! You've got to think for your selves! You're ALL individuals!
The Crowd: Yes! We're all individuals!
Bryan: You're all different!
The Crowd: Yes, we ARE all different!
Man in crowd: I'm not...
The Crowd: Sch!

Anyone who declines this option is an utter fool. This is a gift from the biglaw gods, and it's the last one you'll ever get.

35,

Major sports have employment contracts - even if not guaranteed - have clauses to handle such situations. Law firm "offer letters" are not binding on the firm (but are on the law student).

I guess law students should choose more wisely before passing up other offers -- so they dont have buyers remorse later.

36- They just spent your summer salary to pay someone else not to work for them.

I think this points up the need to accept multiple offers. Accept offers from 4 big firms, wait around and take walk away money from three of them.

I would absolutely love to take $70k off their hands for not working for them, ever.

What a colossal waste of firm resources. Nobody should care about reputation and prestige at this point, just survival.

Does this make any economic sense? Paying people to not work?

Anyone know which offices and practice areas were given this option?

34 - I'm pretty sure involves manatees and beachballs with words on them.

Out of curiosity, I peeked at this story's poll results. It would appear many of you deluded curs have no faith in an economic recovery or in Commissar Obama's plans. You asked for change and now you are getting it. While on the subject of Obama, why hasn't any democratic candidate, including Commissar Obama, won an election outright based on substance since LBJ (aka Fresca button pusher)? All democratic presidents since LBJ won elections based on a referendum vote of eschewing the prior republican presidency. In Obama's case, the "white guilt" factor played a substantial role.

48 -- that comment maybe enough to spark the PE - Future Elie throwdown we have been waiting for. Future Elie FTW.

Reg: [arriving at Brian's crucifixion] Hello, Sibling Bryan.
Bryan: Thank God you've come, Reg.
Reg: Well, I think I should point out first, Bryan, in all fairness, we are not, in fact, the rescue committee. However, I have been asked to read the following prepare statement on behalf of the movement. "We the People's Front of Judea, brackets, officials, end brackets, do hereby convey our sincere fraternal and sisterly greetings to you, Bryan, on this, the occasion of your martyrdom. "
Bryan: What?
Reg: "Your death will stand as a landmark in the continuing struggle to liberate the parent land from the hands of the Roman imperialist aggressors, excluding those concerned with drainage, medicine, roads, housing, education, viniculture and any other Romans contributing to the welfare of Jews of both sexes and hermaphrodites. Signed, on behalf of the P. F. J. , etc. " And I'd just like to add, on a personal note, my own admiration, for what you're doing for us, Bryan, on what must be, after all, for you a very difficult time.

Jehovah Jehovah Jehovah!

As the great Steve Miller once said:
"Go on take the money and run"
**********
And as the great Nikki Sixx once wrote:
"Girl, don't go away mad,
Girl, just go away"

PE - Does your white guilt push you to nail Rick from behind, like Ving Rhames' character in Pulp Fiction?

41,

I'm not talking about who sits in the legally advantageous position between the two scenarios. I was explaining to 24 and 30 why it isn't "pay for nothing."

It is true that a K in the case of the athlete memorializes the agreement and puts the athlete in a better legal position. What it memorializes, in the economic sense, is that the athlete give up a chance to join other teams and does what the team wants the athlete to do - whether that's practice or sit on the bench. Economically, the two are similar - granted the athlete is far more valuable in degree (and thus paid proportionally more).

This is a pathetic passive aggressive way for Bryan Cave to tell these people that they aren't wanted. It's shitty and cowardly of Bryan Cave, but if you've received this offer, take the hint and take the money.

Anyone know what Bryan Cave's offer rates were this summer?

53 - That's funny. I heard Rick bragging the other day that PE is his favorite "bottom."

57: That's funny, I heard PE bragging the other day that Rick has a 12 inch "schlong."

This comment is addressed to post no. 53.

There is no such person as Rick you filthy plebe. Rick's Cabaret is an incorporated entity with shareholders, and in this dour recession was one of the few entertainment companies that has recorded net positive earnings for several consecutive quarters. Please try discrediting someone of lesser stature, preferably one of your peers.

The commentariat on this site has ceased to amuse me. I will no longer read the comments section.

How you like me now?

57/58 - You neglected to mention PE's stable of young latin catamites, all named "Enrique".

And so it continues. Expect more of this within the next few weeks. As I type this, firms with January start dates are probably preparing to make the calls extending the deferrals. And what a horrible phone call it will be when it comes.

61 - You wouldnt have gotten an offer from a v100 firm even in a booming economy.

"Either way, 2009 graduates who hoped to start working at Bryan Cave better have a plan B. Here's a helpful link. "

I think you mean they better have a plan E. Bryan Cave is no better than plan D for any self-respecting lawyer.

read: if you sit around for 2 years, you will become stale and worthless, so we don't want you. instead, we're going to pay you to never waste our time or resources, and get others to start on time, when they aren't stale or worthless

Fenwick offered its incoming 1st year associates $60,000 in "go away" money back in March. Are you ever going to report on this MysTTTal?

Is this $70,000 on top of a summer stipend? Or is it $70,000 including the summer stipend?

59 - Correction: Rick's Cabaret (which is a gay night club in the Philly area) was originally owned by Rick, who sold the joint a few years ago to a syndicate of investors. However, Rick continues to enjoy PE as his "favorite bottom."

60 - I stopped reading the comments ages ago.

53 Here:

PE - Many older men have come out of the closet. It is ok to let go. It is ok to admit you like to experience prison gang rape. Your son, JaKe, will still love you.

Baam

71: Correct. It also might help with PE's plea bargain, as right now, PE is considered a sex offender under MA law for his recent "indiscretions" at a family beach on Martha's Vineyard.

Yours truly,
The Sheriff of Chilmark

TAKE THE MONEY!!!

I hear that the BC folks will pay double if you engage in deviant sex acts with partners. Use of animals gets you triple. Use of corpses, well you get the idea. These law firms are so full of shit it's hard to believe that they ever made any money for partners. If I was a client of a firm that paid first years not to show up, I would leave immediately for another firm.

The ship be sinking...

I say take the money, pay off as much of your loans as possible, and clerk for the U.S. District Court in the Virgin Islands. Then you can land a sweet U.S. Attorney spot there.

Addressed to 48,

And don't you think its interesting that republican Presidents have sucked so much that an opponnent need only promise to be different to prevail?

76 - that is actually pretty solid advice. At this point, given that biglaw will not be happening for most of us in the Cursed Class of 2009, we should all start looking for the best lifestyle jobs.

I beg the hiring partners to get the extended deferral/revocation over with already and CALL US NOW, like TODAY.

TAKE THE MONEY AND RUN!!!

I paraphrase the "day after" Rick and Partner Emeritus got it on (for those not in the know, PE has a gag over his mouth):

Bruce Willis: We cool?
Ving Rhames: Yeah, we cool.
Bruce: What are you going to do now?
Ving: Me, and a couple of hard charging negroes with pliers and a blow torch, are about to get medievel on this son of a bitch. YOU HEAR THAT YOU HILLBILLY RAPIST!

Watch for yourself:
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=ving+rhames+pulp+fiction&search_type=&aq=2&oq=ving+rham

Any word on Bryan Cave summer associate offer rates?

how is this even a question? run, don't walk, over there for that check.

This site is rife with TTT grads today that will never set foot inside a firm with more than 30 lawyers.

"70K to do nothing!!!"

That's a classic TTT grad comment.

83,

Im not a TTT grad, T20 grad starting at v35 firm on time -- and i pretty much think its 70k to do nothing. To be fair, its 70k to walk away from bryan cave if/when they decide to bring you on...but since the firm owes you nothing (legally), its as good as nothing.

I wouldn't take the money necessarily - but thats because I dont know what the deferment stipend is, nor do I think there are many employment prospects out there.

I think over-generalization and blanket statements are "classic TTT grad comment[s]."

83 nailed it.

84: What is a T20 grad? Let me guess - you are working at some bush firm with armadillos running through it.

It should be called "Charlie Sheen money".

It should be called "Charlie Sheen money".

Let's Recap this AmLaw 100, #72 on the Vault Presitge Rankings:

Fall 2008: Defer Class of 2008 to January....Check
Winter 2008: Salary Freeze...Check
Feb. 2009: Layoff 136, including first-years that just started....Check
Summer 2009: Associate Salary cuts....Check
September 2009: Pay Class of 2009 to go away...Check
Offers to Class of 2010: ????

Yeah, if you don't take the money, you are setting yourself up for PAIN. For anyone who thinks the employment prospects of attorneys is stabilizing, I got an idea I'd like to sell you.

Folks this is BigLaw for you right now...its not a place you want to be as a young associate anytime soon. A six figure salary means nothing when it could evaporate at any time.

And for those of you who think these are just no-name firms, we're talking about 1000+ lawyer shops. There really is not a safe place for an associate in BigLaw right now.

That's a coincidence. 70K is exactly what Bryan Cave paid me not to go away when I started there as a 1st year nearly 2 decades ago. (Yeah, I'm old. What of it?)

90: big whoop, wanna fight about it.

The only positive thing I can say is that they seem to be learning from their mistakes. They gave earlier notice to Class of 2009 that they were getting deferred and now they're giving them four months notice that, in reality, they don't have a job for them in January. Its better than waiting till December to tell them that. Or wosre yet, letting them start in January and then laying them off shortly there after, which they've done in the past.

Firms need to know that its shitty to have to tell a young associate that they don't have a job waiting for them, but waiting till the last minute is even worse. The more notice the better...oh...and the $70k is a must.

Are you kidding 92? It is a really shitty thing to do and they did it! They don't have any intention of hiring anyone in 2010 at all. Well, except perhaps laterals or partners from other firms with big names and a very long list of clients that will come with them. They only see dollar signs. In fact, I would bet there will be more layoffs in departments where the business is down and the partners are not reaching their goals. No work for associates, no jobs for associates and the same goes for staff as well. These types of decisions are talked about for months. They don't just come about in a day. Wake up. They knew this months ago. These firms don't care about you. Get it through your head. They expand and grow, they take on more than they can handle and when it comes to "who pays the price" it is the little guys. The only thing that matters is PPP $$$. They should have let you all accept jobs at other firms and not promise you a position and now lower the boom. They knew, don't kid yourself. Why didn't they do this during the summer months? Summer associates? Bad publicity?

BigLaw is dead for now. They are trying to look like the good guys but they are not. They give you the money to look like "hey we are taking care of these people". Do you see how many commented here like "wow 70,000 to do nothing". That is exactly what they want.

The new year is coming and with it, probably more surprises so just take the money at this point. You have no other choice and you have earned it at this point. It will help you survive for a while. They have no intentions to call you in for a job down the road, just look at this with your eyes wide open and be realistic. Law doesn't = caring about someone's future.....they don't really give a damn they just want you to go away quietly.

Good Luck.

What happens to those that don't take the money? What do they offer those who don't accept this deal?

56 & 81 - last time I talked to my friend who summered at a BC office, he said they pushed the offer decisions back until after August. Last year you knew before interview season, not this year. With this news today, I'd be shaking in my boots if I was a BC summer.

Any news on if Bryan cave summers got offers yet?

Latham would just bring them all in and fire everyone four months later.

Did Stroock make offers to its 2009 summers?

Some summers were given offers this week.

Hmmm....Did Bryan Cave know that they weren't going to have work for any new associates back in February when they laid off 70 attorneys? You bet your ass they did. Did Bryan Cave know they could'nt possibly hire these kids when they cut all associate salaries back in June? Of course.

Or what about when they deferred them initially....you don't think they knew then that there was no way in hell they could hire these kids? Instead, they wait till September? I mean the $70k shoosh money is owed, but how about a little honesty and being upfront with people from the get-go. That's worth something to. BC is the type of firm that causes me to get that little taste of throw-up in my mouth whenever I hear its name.

I bet they would like to defer that Atlanta office....

I was laid off and given "go away" money. It was nowhere near $70k. And I actually contributed to the firm and am a licensed, experienced attorney. How do I become a new grad again?

103: I hear ya. If your giving new grads who've never practiced a day in their life $70k, how can you not give your laid off attorneys, who you've told its not you...its the economy, significantly less? These new grads have had more than their fair share of notice that the economy sucks and full-time employment prospects are limited, yet you blind side your formerly employed associates back in February with significantly less departure pay. The managment committee of Bryan Cave is certainly a misnomer.

Bet they're now super glad they swallowed that turd that was Powell Goldstein.

They were having problems before they swallowed PoGo. BC was one of the first firms to announce a salary freeze back before they merged with PoGo. Although, you're right. It probably didn't help things especially after the PoGo partner departures of those not in support of the merger partner or otherwise unhappy with their newly decreased power with BC.

How about a post about firms that still have not told 2009 summers about offers b/c they're trying to save face during fall recruiting.

Just got no-offered owned by BC

BC is the Titanic!

Jump!

#88 right on. You got it all down. Tell us what's next!

December 2009????

I'm guessing their going to offer a small percentage (20%) of this past summer class (Class of 2010) an opportunity to participate in their new year-long internship/professional development program in which they get paid $65,000 for the year, have an opportunity to work on some real client work, but mostly attend "training" videoconferences in which "elite" partners, with nothing else to do, show them a security agreement or explain what a Chapter 11 case is.

At the conclusion of this excellent opportunity, a few elite performers will be extended a job offer as a full-time associate for which they will be paid slightly below market ($90s in 2011) and have a billable goal of 2000 hours.

If this were to happen, it would just be yet another very poor decision on their part (need I remind everyone of the POGO takeover). Did they extend offers to the summer class that just left? If so, that is the proof of how this firm operates so unfairly. How the hell could they even contemplate, for a second, extending offers to the summer class that just left a month ago and ask the class from a year ago to go away? Who the hell is at the wheel? Has anyone checked him/her for a pulse?

Maybe you can answer this for us. When are they going to ask the partners that are contributing nothing at all to the the firm, the ones that are just sitting there taking up space in their very big offices, to go away? When are they going to wake up and start at the top? There are so many partners just taking up space with no work and nothing to do it isn't funny. If they asked them to go away it would save them a ton of money and earn them a ton of respect!

To all the students that were given the offer of 70K, take the money and look elsewhere. Firms with large bankrputcy practice areas are a good place to look. IP litigation areas are busy right now as well.

Good luck.

I interviewed at the New York Office of this TTT firm few years back just to see what a TTT looks like. Boy it was shitty.

Most of the lawyers there were 2nd tier toilets who showed insecurity towards my T5 law school.

They paired me up with associates from decent school but none of them graduated honors. One of them was from Fordham and asked me why I decided to go to my law school instead of Fordham. I was like..ummm..are you kidding me.

Bottom Line, Bryan Cave is sinking real fast. From what I heard it is a sweat shop and I MEAN a REAL sweat shop. You get the worst quality of work possible and work for some of the most obscure and weird clients, mid-to-small size corporations you've never heard of.

What's BC New York's offer rate for the class of summers who just finished?

Offer rates? Who in their right mind would even think for one second they would secure a job with BC? In what year 2035?

If they are given an offer do ya really think things will work out? They can't even keep their in-house people safe and employed. Go look elsewhere.

115- I guess that means you don't know their offer rate

Yes that is correct. Are you waitng to hear on an offer or were you turned away?

If you were not given an offer then you are better off. Something better awaits you. If you were given an offer, it probably would have been rescinded.

You seem to have forgotten that Fish & Richardson did this to a bunch of their prospective first-years a few months ago. They only paid $30,000 though.

These firms are sinking ships. Other firms are planning their 2010 summer class already. These students are better off not at these big firms. Most of these firms are still taking cost cutting measures and doing away with people, quietly laying off. This doesn't look good for these firms. Tto ask these future lawyers to just take the money and go away because they may not need them down the road at all. What does it say? I assume they are thinking that more business will be there in 2011? Not good. If I were a client I would question every move they are making and probably take my business to a smaller firm.