2/27/09
Never Forget

I believe I drank an Arnold & Porter at lunch yesterday

First Square Sanding or whatever and now this? These posts are really getting out of hand. I have a simple suggestion: Create two ATL sites. One for the big boys and another - Junior ATL - for small firms in small cities. Hate to sound like a snob, but I don't come to this site for stories about some firm I've never heard of. The new site could be called Below the Law or Below Above the Law.

Latham laid off way more than 44 staffers.

"Above the Law has been able to confirm that there nearly fifty staff members lost their jobs yesterday."

"Arnold & Porter confirmed the new to Above the Law a short time ago:"

nice. anus.

I bet a majority of the 44 laid off staffers didn't foresee this type of "hope and change" when they voted for Commissar Obama. Best of luck to these 44 out-placed staffers on the breadline.

10 char

ATL - what evidence do you have that these staff layoffs have anything to do with the recession or with A&P's ability to weather it? Law firms have been reducing staff for decades. There are fewer secretaries, proofreaders, fax guys and copy people for the same reason society employes fewer typewriter repairmen, blacksmiths and canal boat pilots. Thirty years ago any firm worth its white shoe reputation had a lawyer:secretary ratio of 1:2 at most. These days that ratio is more like 1:5 or 1:6.

who cares about staffers? did they take on $150k in loans and waste three years of their lives to get their jobs? No.

Has A and P done stealth layoffs?

who cares about staffers? did they take on $150k in loans and waste three years of their lives to get their jobs? No.

The ship be sinking

4- You're an idiot for never hearing of A&P.

6- Agreed. And what is "you Vault" Who is writing (or editing) these posts?

11- Not that anyone is aware of.

How you like me now?

4, you need a moniker to accompany your schtick.

15 - How you like Obama now?

Welcome to ATL, 14.

what is the situation at a&p, h&h, and wilmer with stealth layoffs? not much word on these lately.

10/12 - No, they were smarter then that. At least when they get let go they don't need to contemplate which floor they need to leap from in order to acheive terminal velocity.

They can find other work - you, as an over indebted, unperforming lawyer....not so much. Jump.

This is totally racist, but I read comment 4 in the voice of a coast dwelling white man with a mobile headset

24 is exactly right

They was axed to leave.

elie eats dong

As predicted, the layoffs begin.

Honestly, I always felt a bit bad for Elie. I felt that folks were blowing the occasional typo way out of proportion.

But this is ridiculous. I swear to God my six year old could do better. Elie, you are a fucking idiot. Not law school idiot. Just idiot.

If you're banging one secretary in the ass while firing another via text, then you, too, can be above the law.

A&P is a dipshit law firm, full of dipshits. If you're a man, A&P most certainly isn't the place to be, since you get to support a bunch of girl attorneys working part-time.

After my secretary got laid off, she left her Obama button in her cubicle. I didn't vote for Obama, but I took the button. I may start wearing it one day if he keeps getting all of this trash out of the work force.

This is totally racist, but I read 28's comment in the voice of someone who didn't go to senior prom

4 - that schtick is lame and been played out.

nobody cares

PE

What an irrelevant comment. Heller, Thelen and other large firms collapsed before "Commissar Obama" was elected. And, no, I didn't vote for Obama.

re: 4, it's actually funnier w/o a moniker. not because the content is funny (it's not) but because there is inevitably somebody in each post that takes it seriously.

How many of those staffers were posting on facebook when they heard the news?

34 understands how trolling works. Like terrorism, the real intent is to provoke a reaction. All the people posting the "ATL Junior" shtick have been surprisingly successful in that regard.

27 is a god amongst men.

#11, A&P has been conducting stealth layoff for at least a year.

#9, it has everything to do w/ the economy.

Looking to lateral into an Atlanta mid-law litigation shop. Anyone have the lowdown on Atlanta midlaw firms? Which places to avoid? Help.

Elie,

Typos are okay. They happen. Most of us forgive you for them.

But when your affirmative action writing interferes with our reading and understanding of the post, you deserve to die.

39 -- You should avoid Atlanta entirely. It's a shitbox.

37 = 27

Also, Elie's typos and errors of grammar are not "okay". Elie's writing sucks.

PE is a 66 year old virgin who jerks off a lot. That is all.

42, so does yours.

errors of grammar? let's try "grammatical errors."

are not "okay". ? let's try putting the punctuation inside the quotation marks, like so: "okay."

43

Are you saying PE is a world famous bankruptcy partner at Weil?

A&P is a grocery store, why are we even discussing it here?

This comment is addressed to post no. 29.

Did the button look like the one on this site?

http://buttons.cafepress.com/item/quotcommissar-obama-2008quot-225quot-button/317743574

This comment is addressed to post no. 29.

Did the button look like the one on this site?

http://buttons.cafepress.com/item/quotcommissar-obama-2008quot-225quot-button/317743574

9 - It appears that you are saying there are 5 or 6 secretaries to every lawyer. That's a lot of ass-pounding, my friend.

Elie, how often did one of the attorneys at Debevoise rip into you for allowing these blatant typos slip past?

Port her? Hardly even knew her! Old A&P joke.

Let me remind anyone considering acts of corporate espionage or disparagement that today's muckraker is tomorrow's Marxist. My company, which has very affluent and powerful friends, will see to it that all participants and organizers of subversive activities are dealt with swiftly and efficiently. Their cause, which seeks to tongue-block our great nation from the sweet nourishing nectars of trade and commerce, is rife with immorality and indecency. It should not be tolerated. Indeed, to diminish an employer’s right to conduct his business as he pleases is to diminish the Republic! For these reasons, I will need all first year associates to go into the fields tonight and gather nectar. The half who gathers the greatest amount of nectar will be allowed to return to work on Monday.

LOL, good, screw these jerks for not offering me a callback. I hope "staffers" means "partners."

This is exactly the kind of thing a responsible firm should be doing. Layoffs are part of a recession and strong firms have the will power to make smart business decisions.

If the last year has taught us anything, it's thfat staff layoffs are a precursor to attorney layoffs. This makes this news relevant.

So get ready for a solid round of layoffs in the next 4 to 8 weeks at A&P. Or lateral quick if you can get some value from the A&P name before it's too late. Or if you are a female associate and bangable, get banging tonight in some partners office, even offer to jump in if there's already a secreatary in there with him (or vice versa).

44

You're an idiot.

First, the phrase "errors of gramar" versus "grammatical errors" is simply a matter style and is not incorrect grammar.

Second, get a copy of "The Elements of Style" and actually ready it before you comment on punctuation.

Third, let me introduce you to CAPITAL LETTERS. You use them at the beginning of sentences.

And fourth, I never held myself out as a writer, but Elie claims to be one, and he sucks out loud as a writer.

55: "simply a matter style"?

52 - Sorry you couldn't make the cut. Rest assured that it is not the partners who are getting laid off. They are smart enough to remove under-performing staffers and avoid giving an offer to dipshits like you, and will be making lots of $$$ for years to come.

57 - rest assured that you dont have half the info.....from someone on the inside.....partners are not immune to a problem in the future.

PE - i know YOU are getting fired sooooon....

The ship be sinking...

Screw you 10/12. You are an idiot. Administrative Staff/Secretaries are people too, so are mailroom workers, fax workers, word processors and messengers and receptionists. You really suck big time. What's your problem that you can't find a job and are unemployed? You are so wonderful eh? Think you are better than everyone else? I don't think so. You can take your $150,000 and your useless law degree and shove it up your ass until you choke on it! Idiot. You can kiss your career goodbye. It is the idiots like you that give all lawyers a bad name. People are people. Douch bag.

By the wa, 52, no staffers are not partners. Staffers are the little people who do all the work and get canned when the partners can't bring in the business and keep the firm running on solid ground. Staffers are the little guys who pay the price for the big guys not pulling their weight but wanting their cut of the profits.

Good luck to all the A&P staffers that were let go, it is not an easy market out there but you will be fine.

@Dubya - you're an irrelevant FUCKING HAS BEEN MORON! It's OBAMA'S ECONOMY NOW MOTHERFUCKER!

Deal with it! ...and watch the economy BURN thanks to his policies!

the ship be sinking..

This firm is no different from any other biglaw firm. They are all squeeze the lemon and discard the rind shitholes.

I am a 1L female at TTT but am pretty attractive. Is there way that I can leverage my looks to get a job at Big Law? The thought of being with a BigLaw partner really turns me on. I don't find myself as attracted to BigLaw associates who will never be partner.

Take up a job in a bordello. Same difference.

Arnold & Porter is a peer of the large dump I took this morning. Fuck these "prestige" firms; they collectively suck.

- Employed T50 grad of a state school with zero debt.

Arnold & PorTTTer.

Comment # 20 should be removed. It is never appropriate or funny to joke about suicide.

mass layoffs await many firms as they jettison associates before bonus time. better buckle up new yorkers cause the reaper is coming back!

10 months after Obama was greeted by a $1 TRILLION deficit, an economy on life support, and two ill-concieved wars, and trolls are already claiming he's responsible for layoffs based on last year's business decisions.

Of course he is. What black man isn't responsible for the idiotic budgets of a president who turned a $700 billion surplus into a $1 trillion deficit? It's only affirmative action bozos who say things like, "Maybe the people in charge at the time were the ones who spent the damn money."

Only the truly observant can look past things like that to find the kool aid drinking conspiracy underneath it all. Obama's grandparents planted the birth notice, and THEN convinced a Republican president AND a Republican controlled congress to spend our country to the brink of disaster. Of course.

It is absolutely awful that dedicated employees lost their jobs. Many of these people have worked 5, 10, 15 years at A&P and now they are on the unemployment line. As for you whiny babies complaining about your loans and working hard three years -- who are you kidding --- in a couple of years you can pay off that loan (providing you don't party party and are responsible). There are lawyers who appreciate the staff and now it will that much harder for them to get their work done.

Good luck to all who lost their jobs.

P.S. Yes, attorneys are next, just wait and see.