OOOOO. Ooooo. Second!

Thirdsty!

Haaaaahvard is the ONE!

At least Harvard is a good school.

Duke (rarely) wins.

can i write in georgetown please

Duke should win this. That said, people were dumb enough to vote for Harvard over UVA (sorry, I meant UVa . . douches) so they'll probably do it again

Is it me or has the Duke undergrad reputation overly influenced Duke's progress in this tourney? Based on experience (albeit only knowing like five Duke law students), there's no question that HLS students are douchier than Duke law students.

UVA - easily.

Late Night Shots = Douches.

As a Duke Law grad, I have to say that this is like being guilty of assault but being convicted of murder. This is assuming we win, and all indicators suggest we will. Of course there are douches at Duke Law School - there are at all law schools. But we are really not even above average in our douchetude.

I admit that we do have a problem stemming from the fact that our best-known alumni are often notorious for all the wrong reasons. But are we, on average, really more douchetastic than a law school three times as big that is almost synonymous with both high achievement and entitlement and pomposity?

I leave off here because, frankly, I'm not sure anymore whether it is better to be the douchiest or merely the runner-up. Perhaps we should simply be content to be number one in something.

10 -- to answer your question, "yes."

Late Night Shots, bitches!
Learn it.
Live it.
Love it.

10,

Best use of the word "douchetude" ever!

It's a shame that not enough people have even heard of UVA to carry it over Harvard.

How do I know if I am a douche?

It's a travesty that there wasn't a landslide victory for UVA in this contest.

First time commenter: this cannibalistic "article" cements ATL's place as the douchiest website ever (x1000). Fueling the writhing underclass to cast greater legal institutions under the bus serves no legitimate purpose. Not voting, and likely not visiting again.

T10 2L (neither of these)

Douchiest commenters

1. Layed off Latham Loser
2. PE
3. Jake E
4. Is this law school accredited?
5. nervous T 10 (I included him even though he appears to be gone- thank god)
6. Frat stud (It is bad when the frat guy finishes 6th)
7. Frat Lathario
8. Elie wiesel

I'm nervous about smelly wiesel's asslobster.

I've meet plenty of cool, down-to-earth people from Duke. Never met a single person from Harvard I could stand for more than 8 minutes.

Harvard is full of douchebags.

Cast me in with those who think Duke Law has gotten unfairly maligned because of Duke's douchtastic undergrads.

Well, I'm a bit disheartened. This is a crown I didn't want to win.

-Duke 2L

If you must know, the answer is yes. Both of these schools are accredited by the American Bar Association and are members in good standing of the Association of American Law Schools. Numerous of their professors belong to SALT and their librarians belong to AALL.

"DOUCHIEST" TITLE GOES TO . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ATL!

This survey, like most lame ATL content, is more amusing than accurate, more mean-spirited than constructive, and detrimental to law students and the legal profession.

More and more, the content produced by lard ass (Elie), Lat, and whatever other losers work on the site mirrors the cynicism and cruelty of its commenters, who can be highly entertaining but are often likely posers.

Guys, how can we have a serious contest about douchiness and not have Gtown and Penn? On my "campus" visit at Gtown, I actually heard students debating their USNWR ranking at what was supposed to be a social gathering. I almost lost it. I've actually never met a non-douchie Penn grad. Think about your experience as a lawyer. Have you ever met someone from Penn who isn't a douche? The answer is no, which is why this contest is a travesty.

10 -- The answer to your question is "yes."

22 -- Don't be ridiculous. This "survey" has little to do with you. Few people who voted in this absurd survey know you, have met any of your classmates, or have even been to North Carolina.

24 -- Accurate.

25 -- Also accurate.

Kash, do you douche before you go on hot dates?

I vote for whatever school 17 goes to.

Je veux prendre une douche. Je suis tres sale.

It's not just the Duke undergrads who are douches... remember Tucker Max went to Duke LAW, and it is tough to get much douchier than that.

This does make for a conundrum... does the douchyness of one of the douchiest douches on the planet outweigh the collective douchyness of an entire other school... MAN this one is tough.

23, that's not correct. Duke's accreditation was revoked when it underwent its routine re-accreditation process in spring 2008.

Duke is now an online school not eligible for ABA accreditation. However, it is accredited by the State Bar of North Carolina, so rising 2L's take the 'baby bar' and are then eligible to keep studying if they pass; upon graduation, they can sit for the state bar exam and may be able to eventually get into other jurisdictions by reciprocity.

Thank you 17 and 25.

-- T10 2L

Tucker Max also went to Blair Academy.

UVA Late Nite Shots

29 = douche

-- 33

Dude, I'm glad i decided not to go to Harvard or Duke. I've meet a ton of cool kats at Southwestern.

Yes.

Kash

UVA not in the final? Nonsense.

36 - did you graduate from college? all i can find is that you went to NYU, dropped out before graduating (for good reason), and are now enrolled in a law school. i thought you had to have graduated from college to be admitted to an aba-approved law school.

UVA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Both of those pictures are of UVA students, not Harvard or Duke.

So if I went to to Duke undergrad and Harvard Law, does that make me the douchiest douche of all douche bags? A veritable Douchy McDoucherson, or Sir Douche Baggerton, if you will?

41 - Nope. Survey is wrong. Duke -> UVa Law would be worse.

UVA chicks have huge fupas.

Hook 'em horns!

Ridiculous that Duke is winning. UVA was given a terrible seeding and Harvard is the only worthy contender remaining.

Come on guys, don't ever let Duke be #1 at anything.

I happened to stroll by NYU Law earlier today - it looks as though its douche factor may be underestimated - there were some real classics milling around out front.

HLS grad here. The only douche I met in school was a transfer student from Georgetown. Just saying...

And only 1/4 of those Duke douches are getting biglaw jobs in this economy. LMAO.

- CLS 2L Stud (proud non-douche)

Madras.

duke should take this crown. while 100% of duke law students r douches for going down to that sh*thole durham based solely on the mistaken belief that duke is an impressive law school, only 75% of harvard law students r douches, comprised of those people who got in through the crapshoot that is the application process and suddenly think they r smart. while harvard has like 600 students, so technically more douches, duke is thoroughly douche. in my eyes, that is more important.

Fair Harvard! we join in thy jubilant throng,
And with blessings surrender thee o'er
By these festival rites, from the age that is past,
To the age that is waiting before.
O Relic and type of our ancestors' worth,
That hast long kept their memory warm,
First flow'r of their wilderness! Star of their night!
Calm rising through change and through storm.

The one Duke Law alumn i know hated the school because the doucheness of the undergraduate population was so overwhelming... I think DLS is getting an unfair shake.

I don't see how UVA doesn't win this.

The one time I visited that place my girlfriend hailed a cab outside of a bar, opened the cab door, and then one of those seersucker and brass buttoned jacket wearing douche bags jumped in front of her into the cab and said, "Don't worry, I have more money than you."

I guess they all can't be that bad, but it from the comments it seems like a lot of people agree with me.

Duke is obviously the douchiest of the two. Harvard only made it this far based on the pathetic jealousy of others who have no idea what the school is even like.

Of course, even Duke probably isn't THAT douchey; there has to be worse out there, right?

"HLS grad here. The only douche I met in school..."

I realize everybody is defensive about where they went, but be honest--even out of people who actually liked their law school experience, how many would actually say "the **only** douche I met in school..."

I went to a school that got knocked off in the first round and hasn't caught much flack in these threads and I'll still freely admit we had douches aplenty.

"Harvard only made it this far based on the pathetic jealousy of others who have no idea what the school is even like."

So, where are Stanford and Yale?

The stock photo of the Harvard douche should be wearing the Harvard clothing line, and the Duke douche should be facepainted in blue.

The UVA Law Weekly had an angry comment about making the Final Four in the douchiest law school competition. If that's not douchy, I don't know what is.

What about Texas? They have HUGE douches in Texas because a 3500 sq ft wife needs a huge douche.

Did the comment say: "Will you guys stop being so douchy so we don't win this kind of shit?"

i think the terms douchebag and douchey have jumped the shark.

I think the term jump the shark has jumped the shark.

Kash, what do you think of this? http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D9AGKHNO0&show_article=1

I can't believe Georgetown isn't in the finals. I've met 4 people from Georgetown, and all 4 are douches. . . huge douches. . . and one is also a guido from NJ who went to Georgetown and evolved into the uberdouche-guido combo that is rare to come by.

I only know 3 kids from Harvard Law, but I like all 3 (all 3 are girls though).

Just saying in my experience, Georgetown is batting 100% in my books.

SMU is still the douchiest. Sadly, they can't even break into the 30s.

Lobster wars!

This will be the only competition dook has won since 2001, but they're going to win.

Anyone who thinks dook is being unfairly lumped in with their undergrad population has obviously not met many dook law students. Words cannot describe how huge of douches those fuckers are.

This post is addressed to Commenter #18:

Having been here for less than two weeks, I humbly accept your naming me #3 on your list. Thank you.

Also, please note that this post would not have been possible had I not installed a wireless connection in my private jet earlier this week. This post also required Jessica to take a break. All things considered, you really should be thanking me.

If you attracted only the douchey people at Harvard and conclude, based upon that fact, that all of Harvard is douchey, you may be overlooking the simpler explanation: YOU may be a douche magnet. And if you are, you'll probably soon be writing in that the whole world is douchey. (Which is just what we'd expect a douche magnet to write, actually.)

i feel like harvard is getting votes solely based on perceptions from "Legally Blonde"

I miss Dune guy.
Whatever happened to Dune guy?

Texas
UVA
Canada

10, Thanks for making the choice easy for me. I was on the fence, and then I read your post comparing having your law school called douchey with being convicted of murder. That total lack of perspective easily puts you over the top.

BTW, I wouldn't recommend going into criminal defense work. "Dude, you're being charged with murder? I can totally relate, . . . "

Flank steak.

Even the Harvard logo looks douchey. I can't say I'm terribly inspired by the blue bondage freak, but he just looks kinky, not douchey.

45 is correct: this year's 1L class has an appalling douche ratio.
-embittered NYU 3L who still lives in Dag.

Duke Law is certainly douchey, but people's perceptions of the undergraduate college has probably influenced their voting. Harvard should win this, hands down.

-Duke 3L

Not even close--got to go with the Dookies for Duchiness. I mean, a least the kids at Harvard are supposed to be smart. Not so in the South at Duke. Besides, isn't Duke the school that tried to frame those innocent lacrosse players? After those players finish with their lawsuits, they might literally own Duke. Seriously.

All of the douchiest people whom I knew when I was an undergraduate went to Harvard Law. Harvard has my vote.

~Colum. L. Rev. 3L

77--Yeah, that was Duke, its wing-nut faculty, and President that tried to throw the players under the bus. My bankruptcy professor didn't find any humor in a question about Duke University and Chapt. 11. Incredibly, none of the loonie G88 faculty were fired. Rome is burning and our endowment is about to get much, much smaller. Glad I'm out-of-here soon.

--Another Duke 3L (secure)

To all these Duke law students (76, 79): BTW, where the hell was Duke law school during the Duke Lax Hoax scandal? Did the entire law faculty decide to sit out this generation's Scottsboro Boys' fiasco? What a bunch of pussies. Duke certainly earned my Duchebag vote.

"This survey, like most lame ATL content, is more amusing than accurate, more mean-spirited than constructive, and detrimental to law students and the legal profession."

@25 -- Where did you get a copy of ABL's Mission Statement?

67 doin' work

80 (79 here): I see your point. Not that it matters, I guess, but I was simply trying to get employed. Yeah, the LAX players got royally screwed. But they're having the last laugh as they bankrupt Duke and drain its endowment. Good for them. Given what they went through I hope they break Duke's balls.

Hello...BYU?

Look at the symbols...the douchey gay looking devil, versus the uber-douchey look at my Latin prestige. It's close, but Harvard wins.

Havad is wikid retahded.

BYU's ineligible. We're only considering accredited law schools and schools where the students know what the word "douche" actually means. BYU fails on both.

Max Tucker seals Duke's fate.

@46 -- In my experience at HLS, the absolute, unrelenting, and pervasive douches all were from Princeton. No one was even close -- not even Duke undergrads. I'd be interested in your perspective.

SORRY. "ATL" not "ABL" I will kill myself now.

-- 81

Tucker Max is not a douche.

He is Jesus.

I once royally screwed a lacrosse player. I think she went to Duke. Or maybe Harvard. I hope she douched after. Biggest lie I ever told? I'll pull out.

A Harvard law chick once shart all over me on a date and then stole my wallet. To me, that screams douche.

Let's scoop the real story, eeeh yeaaah!

Police in the U.S. state of Georgia on Friday arrested a man who made a distraught call to police to report that he found several members of his family killed.

Guy Heinze, 22, called emergency services on Saturday saying he returned home and found family members beaten to death in a trailer in a mobile home park in Brunswick, Georgia. Police said the eight victims ranged in age from children to adults in their 40s.

http://www.reuters.com/article/domesticNews/idUSTRE58404D20090905

credit due, baybee....

In the newest of the faceoffs, we're down to the final four... douchiest blog! on the left side of the bracket we have....

GOING CONCERN!
FASHIONISTA!

on the right side of the bracket, we have....

DEALBREAKER!
ABOVETHELAW!

Going Concern Advances in a landslide!
It's AbovetheLaw by a nosehair!

Going Concern? AbovetheLaw? Which is *the* I mean **THE*** Douchiest blog????

tune in folks, it's going to be a close one....

Gentlemen at the legal preparatory academy with which I was once affiliated, which in full disclosure is the selfsame institution as shown in heraldry at the left at the top of this weblog posting, were afflicted with the symptoms of douchebaggery in proportions not unlike those of gentlemen attending of other legal preparatory academies, but surely not in materially greater proportion. While much derision and scorn may properly be directed at the denizens of the Harvard Law School, Legal Fraternity Lothario found through his own experience -- admittedly more than a decade ago -- that the students of the aforementioned legal preparatory academy come from a relatively wide grouping of socioeconomic strata and circumstances, and thus that douchebaggery is not as pervasive as may commonly be believed in certain portions of the People's Republic of Cambridge. These are only the prolix musings of Legal Fraternity Lothario, his own self, and thus are not of material significance or consequence.

GULC. WAS. ROBBED.

somebody PLEASE read and comment on my pathetic attempt at humor!

yours,
#

heh. >3% of the comments on this blog are mine.

wait. with this comment, make it >4%. stop. hammer time!

what about the place that hired the {chick?/dude?/lesbian?} with man fingers? is it in the running for this compo? if so, it's got my vote. if not, castro. wherever his law school. la facultidad de cuba. or whatever the capital of koo-ba is. eee-yow-zas. (hit me, 92?) time to get my pink sweater. gonna need it tonight, there's gonna be a CHILL if you cat's cat-ch my duh-right. EZ-E is out.

I just passed the TX bar.

This is my first and last post on abovethelaw. In fact, this my last visit to abovethelaw. This story has made me realize that it doesn't matter who wins this face off (and I didn’t' go to any of the schools in the final four) because ultimately the only real losers are the idiots that read this sight. Every law school as some percentage of douche baggery for sure, but no school has the acclaim of Abovethelaw which can confidently represent that 100% of the people who write and read (I count myself in that list) this site are 100% Grade A douches (I will not exclude myself from that list until tomorrow). Congratulations - you are all winners er....losers.

The Lawyer Formerly Known As Douche Bag

Let's look at why any of these Dookie Douches went to Dook:

1. Great City? Durham...I think not.
2. Great Buy? $44,000 tuition...I think not.
3. Tons of Hotties? Oh god, that is funny.
4. Great Basketball Program? When was the last time these guys made it past the sweet 16? I can't remember either.
5. Beautiful Campus? Maybe if you like faux-Gothic look next to rundown, low-income housing.
6. Diverse Student Body? No, everyone is from somewhere within 75 miles of Newark
7. B/c it is almost ranked within the Top 10 in a magazine's annual ranking list? Ding, ding, ding....

That, my friends, is the epitomy of douche.

#80, Duke Law's Prof. Jim Coleman vocally defended the accused lacrosse students throughout their prosecution. Doesn't excuse the undergraduate faculty by any means, but at least get your facts straight.

This post title is sexist.

80 makes a terrific point. During the lacrosse fiasco, why didn't a single law faculty member stand up for due process, factual inquiry and restraint? Does the name Nifong mean anything to you? So much for all the bullsh*t we learned in law school. Apparently, law faculty members aren't any less sheep-like than the masses.

104: Because Chemerinsky didn't want to attract attention to the law school of which he thought he was going to get the Dean position (but got no offerred) and urged the faculty to keep quiet. I teach Con Law but don't practice it.

105, so you're confirming that the faculty bowed to institutional and political pressure and didn't stand up for principle in the face of opposition? Hmmmm, I wonder how the faculty teaches classes like Civil Rights with a straight face. Shameful.

Spot on 101. What makes every Duke student different is that they looked at the rankings when making a decision. What D-bags. When will they learn that no one pays any attention to rankings in the legal profession?

Is the picture the homosexual lawyer from DC over which the ATL staff sports wood?

The DC cops should have piston-wipped his douchy, faggot ass.....

102

Didnt I read somewhere that each of the three players in the Lacrosse case had over a million dollars in legal bills stemming from their defense? It is bs to act like the school was there for them when there is a 7 figure bill involved. Doesnt Duke have a pro bono society or something?

--- 47 self-selected himself as the biggest douche of all, and single-handedly dragged CLS into the douche debate.

--- 49 embarrassed himself and should be forbidden from using the English language.

--- 66 wins the award for most-transparent commenter; he is self-evidently a high school or undergraduate student with some irrational and personal dislike for Duke.

--- Great work 101. You are absolutely correct. No self-respecting non-douche law school applicant ever looks at rankings when applying to law schools, or would ever, ever live somewhere undesirable to attend a higher ranked institution. You make great points, and I compliment your excellent (and highly original) decision to utilize the ten-point list as a way to get those points across. 107 and I are surely not the only readers to find your comment persuasive. Well done indeed, you infant.

--- 17, 25, & 27 make admirable, though futile, arguments.

--- 24 & 93 rightfully direct our attention to how poorly this survey reflects upon ATL (and upon us, its readers and commenters).

The law school doesn't make the douche. The decision to go straight through from college to law school to biglaw makes the douche.

111 has hit the nail absolutely straight on the head. Bravo. This sad trend is what ruins big law. kids- go live a little. don't go straight to law school. don't waste your youth and become some embittered corporate tool.

Does no one understand that Duke law is way way way way different than Duke undergrad!?!?!? WTF . . . I went to Duke undergrad and hated just about every person there; however, Duke law students are a pretty cool and laid-back bunch. ATL readers are pretty dumb if they don't get the difference.

taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar

111, 112 - when I read your comments I almost cried with joy to discover that there are at least two other people on the planet who get it...

What a disaster.

Unfortunately - given that by this point the people making hiring decisions are all of the category described - I am afraid that it only goes downhill from here.

Georgetown has the worst student body. Columbia is 2nd. Duke is overrated as a douchie school.

People who call their school HLS have reached the asymptote of douchiness. Just saying.

Let Duke pay for its sins in a poll over terrible alumni in a different poll. Also, I heard the Tucker Max movie is terrible.

Penn should win this in a heartbeat.

to 111: but does the decision make the douche, or does the douche make the decision? I would venture that most biglaw lawyers were douches before they enrolled in law school as evidenced by the huge volume of douches apparent even in the earliest days of law school orientation periods. Regardless, as 115 points out, douchiness is entrenched in large law firms because the lawyers responsible for selecting new hires invariably favor douches in their own image. It is difficult to imagine the cycle being broken, because non-douches would rarely be innocently confused by a hiring-douche as a douche, and it would be by definition unlikely that a non-douche would effectively imitate a douche to the extent necessary to be hired by a douche.

An accurate but sometimes difficult way of objectively measuring the douchieness of a school or law firm is to calculate what percentage of the the population consists of transfer students. Do we have that data on hand for these two schools? Law firms are sometimes difficult to analyze in this manner because the individuals involved generally try to hide what is widely considered a leading indicator of antisocial tendencies.

Enough of this anecdotal crap ("I knew a douche who went to ____") Of course you did, douches beget douches. The answer to this question demands an empirical study.

A review of the Latham website reveals that 124 of this universally well-liked firm's attorneys went to Harvard Law, while only a meager 30 went to Duke Law. Based on the objective evidence, Harvard wins handily.

Note on margin of error: Due to an apparent technical glitch, the website recently deleted 190 Latham attorneys. If they all these document review monkeys went to Duke, this could change the conclusions.

I went to Penn Law and I am incredibly disappointed that Penn is not in the finals...I hated my 3 years there and think that Penn students are without a doubt the douchiest in the country. Penn beats Harvard hands down.

It's always funny to watch the "hot" girls at Penn suddenly develop crushes on the dorky jewish boys who make Law Review. I'm telling you, kids with aspergers are cool there as long as they're on Law Review and headed to a top firm in NYC. Can we get a re-vote and stack Penn against Harvard?

Duke doesn't belong here at all. It should have been UVA vs Harvard.

80 -- Most Duke Law faculty did just what everyone should have done...waited for some fucking facts to come to light.

123-- Yeah, and they're *still* waiting, just like bitch-slapped little pussies. Those "facts" you refer to came and went about the time Nifong was convicted and sent to jail--don't ya think?? I hope the LAX Hoax victims just bleed Duke's endowment dry. The ass-clowns at "Dook" deserve nothing less.

101 - Did you ever think that maybe Duke Law has things like, I don't know, interesting faculty members, a great program, a dedication to cooperative student learning, a wide variety of pro bono and public interest opportunities, a fantastic library, a devotion to the Innocence Project that recently helped someone wrongly convicted of rape to be released after 14 years, etc., etc.?

Don't get me wrong, we have our douches, but there are plenty of things to like about Duke Law without looking at the rankings.

And as for everyone being from within 75 miles of Newark you're still thinking Duke undergrad - the most people from one state in this year's 1L class are from California.

I vote for whichever school that douche in the picture went to

I vote for whichever school that douche in the picture went to

I went to Duke Law and I'm a douche. It took me a long time after graduating to realize it. We need to own this.

To those of you advocating UPenn as being the douchiest law school, I say any school that employs the same man as head football coach for 50 years could never be considered "douchey" no matter how "douchey" the "douchey" students are.

UpennState is without a doubt the douchiest law school...

Am I a douche?

Indiana 2L

110 = reason y duke takes the title

The LAX players went to a shitty ass school with a student body known for their larger than usual amount of douchebags and appeared to be douchebags themselves. Fuck them and fuck duke. They deserve each other.

who. cares. i need a job.

123, by "waiting for f'n facts to come to light," do you mean remaining silent and allowing innocent people to be convicted in the court of public opinion, victimized by mass hysteria, prosecuted by an unethical prosecutor, and hung out to dry by the school's administration? Is that what waiting for facts entails? Silence, especially by lawyers who presumably uphold the honor of the judicial system, is often just as unethical as jumping to conclusions.

i have that not so fresh feeling

If you voted, you are a douche.

http://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2009/09/04/style/20090906-harvard-slideshow_index.html

32 = Jealous douche who had to settle for UNC when he was rejected from Duke!

Obama is a douche:

http://www.zazzle.com/obama_douche_sticker_bumper_sticker-128109512635697644

Just wanted to re-post a comment from above (though, I was not the original poster).

"Duke Law's Prof. Jim Coleman vocally defended the accused lacrosse students throughout their prosecution. Doesn't excuse the undergraduate faculty by any means, but at least get your facts straight."

All of you who are pretending to have gone to Duke Law and are agreeing with 80 and the others who say no Duke Law faculty came to the defense of the LAX players...I am calling you out. If you were at Duke Law, you would have known of Prof. Coleman's very vocal defense of these players.

Cosign 130.

I was at Duke Law during the LAX fiasco, and several of my professors spoke openly about how the players were getting railroaded and how Nifong was running afoul of prosecutorial ethics rules left and right. What else were they supposed to do? Go toe to toe with the nutjob locals who were banging pots and pans (seriously) in front of the "rape" house and attacking students in parking lots? And the media outlets weren't interested in the innocent argument... from the local news to NPR to national media, there were discussions about how this was just another white-on-black rape that reopened all the wounds of slavery. A lying, unhinged prostitute just wasn't as juicy a story.

The profs did everything profs at any unapologetically liberal school (ahem, all the schools that matter) would have done. They turned it into a teaching opportunity where they could and otherwise pretty much kept their heads down, with the exception of a couple of took an active role in the defense of the accused undergrads.

Rihanna got what she deserved.

Nifong

ps: UVA is Swahili for douche.

To 143: Do you honestly think the Duke Law Profs did "enough"? Really?! I mean, could the "esteemed" law profs had at least gone "toe-to-toe" with the slime-ball Duke President as well as the "Gang of 88" profs that publicly vilified the innocent LAX players. I mean, what's tenure good for if you can't stand up to a PC-driven railroad job? Regardless of what I think, the episode revealed Dook for what it is--a 3d-world, Ivy wanna-be "poseur" univ that's about to burn through its entire endowment to pay for its sins, legal and other. Bye-bye DOOOK.

duke is in DURHAM. only a true douche, blindly seeking US News prestige, would go to DURHAM for a law degree. come on, i mean, who the f*ck would want to go down there. that alone makes them the douchiest.

DUKE is actually an acronym for "Douchiness UnKnown Elsewhere."

Duke's endowment was reported at $4.6 billion in July 2009 (down somewhat from around $6 billion in '07, presumably due to the market).

Can any serious person believe that the lacrosse players are going to "burn through [the] entire endowment"?

A $4.6 *billion* settlement? Really???

"I mean, what's tenure good for if you can't stand up to a PC-driven railroad job?"

Professors are creatures of their institutions. Showing bravery and principle by standing up for the school jocks, when accused of rape, in the face liberal groupthink and presumptions of guilt by everybody you work with and people who determine your advancement and career is more than expect from most of their colleagues at other universities.

Don't take this so much as a defense of Duke as a criticism of the institutions in general.

Also, putting your job and advancement on the line for principle makes great movies, but it's just not what usually happens in reality. In particular, for someone without tenure to have voiced support, and yet have the players convicted, would have been deadly. For someone with tenure, they could still have become a pariah among people they planned to work with for years to come.

The lesson to take away from it is to avoid the deification of professors and academia and recognize that they often act like bureaucrats and politicians when they do voice positions or stay silent.

This really is a difficult choice; both of these institutions are loaded with "douches." To encounter the graduates out in practice is to realize just how little "character and fitness" really means to both the ABA and the schools in question.
Needless to say, they are best suited to organizations where face time is generally minimal or low impact, and their roles are essentially revenue fulfillment.

Durham is a cool city. All of you people saying Durham sucks are the true douches

Durham sucks

@ 151--Actually, Durham is about 75% hellhole.

In all seriousness, Duke Law isn't that bad, as far as law schools go. Yeah there are a ton of insecure, prestige-obsessed douchebags, but this is mostly attributable to the general douchebaggery that is endemic to law students. I'm not convinced that Duke Law is any more (or any less) douchey than its peer schools. The fact of the matter is that law school attracts a lot of maladjusted people whose highest ambition in life is to make tons of money at an "elite" law firm. This is just as true of Duke as it is of other schools.

-Duke 3L

I live in Texas.

NYU transfer students are douches

Co-sign 153. Duke doesn't belong here, UVA does. A quick glance at the comments makes that clear. Way to fuck up even this asinine post, ATL.

INTERESTINGLY, if you click on the detailed poll results (also at the link below), you find a map showing that most people IN Durham voted FOR Duke.

No joke:

http://www.vizu.com//poll-results.html?n=180440

Popped collars.

148: Do you have even a remote clue about how much Duke has *already* paid in terms of settlements, let alone attorney fees? The real kicker is that multiple lawsuits haven't begun discovery--can't wait to see the legal bills once this is all done. Then, of course, these pending lawsuits are real with real claims by plaintiffs that, quite literally, want to see Duke burn. That just doesn't come cheap, my friend. I can't wait to watch the Wheels of Justice grind Duke into oblivion. One less PC cesspool to worry about. Those "Duchies" deserve this end-game.

Name any law professors at other elite law schools that came to the defense of the Duke lacrosse players. Professors at other elite schools had just as good information about the case as the Duke professors and equivalent (and sometimes better) access to the media in order to educate and influence public opinion.

But did THEY raise their voices against injustice?

You can't rape the willing.

Kevin Mooklis

I have never posted on here before, but have to call out 31 for his Tucker Max comment. Tucker Max is all that Dook has going for it. He is a legend and most male lawyers would love to trade places with him (if the stories are true).

Douches are hygienic products; I take that as a compliment.

-- Duke Law Alum

To the 160: Just think about it for a nano-second. Why *should* law profs step into the moral and ethical void created by the wussie Duke law profs/faculty. They perhaps more than anyone else would much prefer to watch the nation's duchiest univ. go down in fiscal flames.

Yes, Durham sucks, but it's not like you have to live in Durham to go to Duke. A lot of people live in Chapel Hill and go to Duke.

Harvard should win this hands down. The amount of entitlement from those students is disgusting.

Tucker Max raped me and I am his father.

Max Hardcore

I don't believe a single one of Harvard's criminal law or constitutional law professors came to the defense of the Duke lacrosse players. This was a major national story touching on elite academia and not a peep from Harvard.

When was the last time a professor from any elite university spoke out in public in support of a politically incorrect cause?

Harvard is the Stanford of the North.

145 -- do you really think it would have been different ANYWHERE else? It's a rare professor at an esteemed school who is going to stand up immediately to defend kids who possibly raped a woman and definitely shouted racial epithets at her in the street (that part, at least, was true).

170: When you write that the lax players "possibly" raped a woman, you miss the salient fact that they, if fact, did *not.* It was a HOAX. You are correct, though, that a single racial epithet was directed at the mentally deranged "escort." The player responsible owned up immediately and apologized. To be sure, it was an odious act. That said, no sane person--and I truly mean no sane person--would ever suggest the lax players deserved the treatment they received from Duke, the faculty, Nifong, and the entire PC establishment. I, for one, hope they continue clean Duke's financial clock. This PC duchie shit has to stop.

AGREED, 171. And how many of the anti-white, racist, liberal professors who signed the screed against the lax players have been fired? All of them should be. They are EXACTLY the type of liberals who are destroying this country (and Duke). If I were a student there, I would have had a difficult time not spreading dog shit on all of their office doors.

Liberals are all disgusting, uninformed racists. That's the truth.

This is stupid. I went to Duke Law, class of 2005. I didn't meet any douches in any of the classes above, with, or after me. Just friendly, supportive, altruistic, community-minded, curious, and excited people. For those that don't know, Duke has an LLM program and an emphasis on international law and public service that significantly colors the JD experience, since so many JDs sign up for the joint program. It really, really is nothing like the undergrad experience. Obviously, this little "contest" is just a parade of stereotypes, but that's how it is for anyone interested in the truth (from a Harvard undergrad--so no bias here). I'll put it this way: When I think of my classmates at Duke, I am humbled and inspired to go out and do more pro bono work, more international involvement, and more alumni giving.

To 173:

Self-righteousness? Check.

Abnoxious do-goodery? Check.

Self-love? Check.

Condescension?

Look in the mirror, 173 -- I believe you will find the douche from your Duke class.

Fuck Nifong.
Go Duke Lax, I now root for you because of Nifong and Duke faculty.
I went to Hopkins.

I get that Nifong did something terribly wrong. I did not see the factulty letter, but I understand that the signatories got it wrong.

What I don't understand is how Duke University is guilty of wrongdoing.

@173: When you find yourself wondering who at Duke was the douche, it was you.

171,

To be clear, I meant that at the time the professors were not acting, it appeared that the players may have raped the woman. It was still then a possibility.

I did not mean to imply that it remains a possibility.

She only deserves to be raped. Big difference.

-170

How is UVA not in the Final 2? I realize it had a very difficult bracket but ... seriously it's uVa.

176, I won't go off the handle because I think you're sincere and obviously not just trying to incite some sort of internet fight. But, the reason why Duke is guilty of wrongdoing is because they hung students out to dry and bowed to public/PC/media pressure. For all the cliched talk about thinking for oneself, standing up to the majority on principle, letting logic reign over passion and distrusting the venom of the masses, Duke managed to demonstrate cowardice in every respect. Those Duke Law faculty (apparently not all) who remained silent were complicit in the railroad job because they should have seen--especially as officers of the court--what a travesty was being perpetrated in the name of justice. It's truly a sad event.

whichever has the most beta males getting whipped by chinese dominatrixes... so HLS

I don't mean to sound antisemitic, but in my opinion the two douchiest law schools in the country - Cardozo and Brooklyn Law School - were not included in this tourney from the start. However, I suppose this turns on a semantic issue...

180,

I don't think the problem has anything to do with Duke Law specifically. As other commenters have pointed out, their actions (or near-collective inaction) probably would have been repeated at any other law school in this country. Law schools are, for the most part, extremely liberal institutions, and the kind of outrage by liberals in the face of overwhelming public attention is reserved for causes involving the defense of minorities.

To rise up and speak out in favor of privileged, straight, white males -- that's just not going to happen at any law school. Period. And it's even less likely at a school that is constantly assailed as being racist simply because it is wealthy and successful amid the economic ruin that is the primarily African-American city of Durham.

Overall, your concern is valid, but it's not a Duke problem. It's a problem with the culture of legal education.

UVA should've won this in a massive landslide, followed by Chicago and then YLS

I don't get how Harvard isn't winning this. With a few exceptions, everyone I know from there is a huge douche. I confess that I don't know nearly as many Duke grads, so perhaps I have not yet experienced the Duke douchieness that is giving them an edge in this poll.

Harvard isn't winning this because it is going up against DOOK! While there are a high number of douches that went to Harvard, many of the older Harvard lawyers are also brilliant, so it lessens the douche factor to a degree. The same can't be said of Dook, which is just all douche. Maybe the Dook nickname will change to Douche after this.

I think Duke was done in by Tucker Max. There is a story on him on the front page of the Arts section in Friday or Saturday's NY Times. He apparently has a movie coming out. It mentions he went to Duke Law School, and man does he sound like a douche.

University of Penn State Law - West Philadelphia Campus for the win!

At least Tucker Max is a conscious douche - that's the root of his whole persona. At Harvard, they're wholly oblivious.

Ha. ha. Ask three liberal politicians about how they're going to pay for socialized health care, and you get three asinine non-responses:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yEHx_1pGYb4

Liberals are, by definition, dumb and uninformed. Dangerously dumb.

183, you make a very valid point. I do think that most top law schools would have behaved as spinelessly as the Duke Law faculty. (I won't concede that faculty anywhere would have behaved as badly as the undergrad faculty, who became the equivalent of an unhinged mob of the Cultural Revolution.) But, the fact is, this case didn't happen anywhere. It happened at Duke, and Duke deserved all the abuse it's getting for this travesty.

wow. thank u for that post, 173. point taken. vote made. u and the other douches at duke now have my full support. I was torn but, man, you are a mega-douche.

thanks a lot 173, that really helped the cause.

I don't recall law professors at Yale, Virginia, Harvard or other top schools speaking out against the prosecutor's case in the Duke lacrosse matter.

194, were you at those institutions? Because I distinctly remember my ethics prof call out Nifong in class as an unethical jerk. Also, don't you think it's more incumbent on the law profs at the very institution where the incident occurred to call out NIfong?

That girl was raped, pure and simple. Those kids were guilty as hell. Back when I was frat-ratting it in Ithaca, this sort of thing happened all the time.

CORNELL FRAT STUD

This should have come down to a doucheoff between Columbia and Harvard. UVA, while pretty silly in its pursuit of Southern frat lifestyle in law school, and Duke cannot hold a candle to the sort of serious, self-righteous douche baggery that those two institutions produce. Every year come recruiting time at my firm, we can count on HLS/CLS to produce the very worst douchebags and the greatest raw numbers of douchebags.

I personally vote for HLS, simply because they seem to be the most self-important douches.

And no, to forestall the "bitter Harvard reject!" comments, I didn't get dinged from Harvard--I graduated plain old cum laude almost 10 years ago.

Wow. Those who are taking 173 as an actual Duke student, rather than the HLS student it clearly is, are getting trolled, old school.

The thing that really makes HLS stand out is how oblivious they are to it.

Whereas at another school, if people made fun of you or commented on how there were a bunch of douchebags from there (something that's not really uncommon for any law school), you might take it as a sign you're acting awkward or snobby--at HLS, it's "just because everybody else is jealous," so you don't modify your behavior at all--nevermind that it's students at other top schools making the criticism and nevermind that those comments don't seem to be directed (as much) towards YLS or Stanford.

I am the 200th douchebag to comment on this story

The Solicitor General of the United States (Elena Kagan) and the four Deputy Solicitors General (Neal Katyal, Ed Kneedler, Michael Dreeben, and Malcolm Stewart) attended, among the five of them, four law schools: Harvard (Kagan), Yale (Katyal and Stewart), Virginia (Kneedler), and Duke (Dreeben). Kagan also has the Princeton-Harvard connection (see Comment 47 above). Draw your own conclusions.

the better question is how many fags graduate from these sissy schools every year. A reunion resembles a gathering of bald, fat homos.

Minor correction: The comment on the Princeton-Harvard connection was #87 above, not #47 above.

Duke runs away with it in a Douche-slide!

This is pathetic. All of it.

I am sofa king we todd it...

I have a friend who, when asked what it's like going to HLS, responds "It's a lot like going to Home Depot -- you're surrounded by tools." Always makes me laugh, because it's true.

That said, I still voted for Duke.

Where is Duke? Connecticut?

52 - Why didn't you grab the guy by the lapels, pull him out of the cab and punch him in the throat? Are you still dating that girl? Something tells me no.

52, I hope you're not telling the truth. In the event you are, I want to apologize on behalf of all UVa students. If he was a UVa student, he was an embarrassment.

@174 -- well done!

Some dude from Duke fucked my girlfriend once. I stuck my fist in his asshole the next morning. LOL.

- CLS 3L Stud

UVa not winning this destroys whatever credibility democracy ever had.

Agree with 130.

The only reason Duke's winning is because DL student's don't give a sh*t about ATL, they're too busy (gasp!) learning the law.

215, that is probably the douchiest post on this thread. Game, set, match, douche. I mean, Duke.

So I was out this weekend with some friends trolling the bars around Alphabet City and I saw this chick that looked familiar. Not that I see a woman as anything more than a hole to drop a load in, but I thought for a bit and realized where I had seen this broad before. Here. It was Kash.

Cutting to the chase, after a few bikinitinis she was on her way back to my place. Let me tell you a few things-yes, she's cute, yes she has a nice body (not model hot, but hot enough) and yes she was willing to put out. Knowing that I was going to report the night's festivities in great detail here, I decided that I was going to go in for the kill: anal. Quite frankly, she surprised me by flipping over and telling me to go for it. She has a bit of a husky voice, so the combo of that with the anal appealed to my downlow fantasy side.

Without further ado, I went for it and felt something unusual touching my cock. It was sort of bone like. I couldn't figure out what it was until I pulled out when the unusual feeling turned into a severe pinching. There, hanging off the end of my dick was a lobster.

217 = tucker max

215, you did not help your cause. You also have a complete logic fail, unless you're arguing that the lack of Duke kids voting versus an influx of Harvard students caused the disparity in the vote. If you're arguing that, you're completely retarded on a level I can't even deal with.

HAHAHAHAHAH everybody is SOOOOO jealous of HLS students!!!

Yeah, everyone voting Harvard, I would like to see you go to the OCI partners who are interviewing you, the majority of whom are HLS grads, and say, 'yeah you went to the douchiest law school." Oh, and tell the President that too, oh and the Supremes that went there, oh, and the SG, oh, and like a zillion governors, CEOs, policymakers, and Harper Hill, famous actor.

Owned.

As a former King & Spalding associate, I can honestly say this firm was the worst place I have ever worked at -- not just worst law firm, but worst workplace period. I thank God every day that I no longer work there or have to list them as my employer. The firm is grossly mismanaged, compounding repeated terrible decision-making with a dog eat dog culture (a bunch of independent contractors sharing space to reduce overhead) that makes the firm's touted "no jerk" policy look pathetic and ridiculous. I have painted my description of King & Spalding with a broad stroke because although there are some good people at the firm, these few individuals are, unfortunately, not in positions of authority, so they are unable to control the wretched decisions made at the top. I would NEVER recommend this firm to any client, much less anyone looking to begin their career here.

221-

There's such a cornucopia of douchiness here, it's really hard to decide what to choose from. The fact you end your comment with "owned"? The fact you think the majority of OCI partners are HLS grads? The fact this upsets you so much you feel the need to issue threats over the internet? Really where to begin?

If somebody said my law school had a bunch of douches, I'd say "yeah, we had a bunch of douches" and we got knocked off early in this whole thing . . . but this really pisses you off.

Honestly--you'd have the balls to go up to a partner from Duke and say his school was full of douches?

A decent amount of prominent politicians graduated from HLS. Of course, the last President prior to Obama who graduated from HLS attended the school before the Civil War. Your douchiness is the reason why.

A decent amount of your classmates may be something one day. You, however, are a pissant, a nobody. Internalize that and you may one day be something.

P.S., if you have to let people know someone's a "famous actor" in describing somebody, they aren't famous.

That is all.

It's hard out there on a UVa.

this is so boring

i love the troll comments, where people claim to be duke and harvard students and make douchey comments.

anyways, the fact is, all of the law schools listed were good schools. all of them will provide a good education. all of them will also provide an exposure to d-bags. unfortunately, unless you're at the top of those schools (perhaps less so the higher you climb in the rankings), ITE, your job prospects are quite suspect.

If you are voting for Harvard, you are basically saying that smart, successful people are douchey. There is no selection of personality type involved at Harvard, because all the strongest students come here. On the other hand, the mediocre students at Duke were probably choosing between Duke, Northwestern, Cornell and Georgetown, and chose to go to the atmosphere that best fit their douchiness.

"There is no selection of personality type involved at Harvard"

Sure there is, it's self-selecting. There are obviously a lot of people who will got to Harvard because it's the highest ranking school they can get into (a douchey thing, but by no means limited to Harvard and smart for your career), but if you have a choice between HYS or going to NYU/Columbia on a scholarship, there are a bunch of people who are going to go to Harvard just so they can say until the day they die they went to Harvard. These people are douches.

The school also inculcates it. Just as it's harder for a rich man to enter heaven than for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle, likewise, it's as hard for a non-douche to spend three years at an institution that emphasizes entitlement and how awesome you are from day one and not wind up being a douche.

"There is no selection of personality type involved at Harvard, because all the strongest students come here."

What an f-ing d-bag

"There is no selection of personality type involved at Harvard, because all the strongest students come here."

What an f-ing d-bag

I still don't know how UVA didn't end up in the final.

I mean really!

228 - Your self-agrandizing arrogance means that you, sir, are a douche. In fact, that behavior is at the very core of the doucheocracy you seek to advance.

I cannot believe no one has mentioned Harvard's preppy clothing line in this thread. People, THEY HAVE A PREPPY CLOTHING LINE THAT IS NOT INTENDED TO BE IRONIC!! THEY SELL DOUCHE-INSPIRED CLOTHING FOR THEIR DOUCHES!!! HOW CAN THEY NOT WIN?

234 - Uh, there have been several posts about the Hahvahd threads in this thread.

Read before you rant will ya.

Wait, I thought Centre College was the "Harvard of the South"...

-FlawLESS

All these Tucker Max references and people seem to forget that Tricky Dick and Ken Starr were both Duke Law alums. Either one is enough to clinch this for the Blue Devils.

— Duke Alum

217 FTW

UVA should have been in the finals.
Because it is not, the win should go to Harvard.

I'm surprised that Vanderbilt was not given a wild-card into the draw. All that "Harvard of the South" BS got me thinking...

I went to UVA and agree it is one of the douchiest. That blonde guy wearing the pink and blue may as well be at Foxfields. But honestly, it was the Harvard kids a UVA who were really the cream-of-the-douchy-crop. But don't let that affect your decision here. I don't think the Duke undergrads could get in to UVA.

Duke might fare a bit better in the polls if it upped its class size to 500 ...

89, if Tucker Max is Jesus, why oh why isn't he dead yet?

221, not sayin there aren't some genuinely nice and bright people at harvard, just that the rest of them r, hm, what's the word i'm looking for, oh that's right, douches.

Because of 221's comments, I am now voting Harvard.

Did EVERYONE miss 157's interesting catch? Something odd is going on with these results.

SEE THE MAP!

Duke over freakin' HAR-FRIKKIN-VARD???? What is wrong with this country? Seriously?

Duke over freakin' HAR-FRIKKIN-VARD???? What is wrong with this country? Seriously?

Duke over freakin' HAR-FRIKKIN-VARD???? What is wrong with this country? Seriously?

221 = Harper Hill

Western State University College of Law is the Harvard of the West!

245,
That's stupid. What are you? A Western State University College of Law student!?

where is GW in this competition? they are the douchiest of them all