Law Firm Swag Contest: The Finalists
Perhaps it's a sign of the times. We received a whopping four (4) entries in our inaugural law firm swag contest. Is law firm swag, like subsidized soda or staff attorney programs, another casualty of the recession?
But if we cancel the contest, then the terrorists win. So, onward!
We realize, of course, that not everyone approves of swag. See, e.g., this comment:
This is fairly disgusting.... I find this article particularly untimely, given that most law students are struggling to find good jobs, and many practicing attorneys are struggling just to keep the jobs they have.
Jeez, commenter 58 -- lighten up! Considering that we cover law firm layoffs in excruciating detail, to the point where many accuse us of doomsaying and fearmongering, we are aware of the tough job market. But, even in the Great Recession, some people are still getting offers -- along with a little swag to sweeten the pot. So what's wrong with some fun to balance out the gloom?
In defense of law firm schwag, here's a trend worth noting: "going green." Firms are trying to be environmentally conscious in their swag selections, as well as more socially responsible in general. This may make schwag less "disgusting" to its critics.
A second theme of swag this year: customization. In this age of individualism and/or narcissism, firms are letting swag recipients have a say in what gets given away. Just as firms are moving away from lockstep in terms of pay and promotion, so too are they allowing for greater tailoring in terms of swag.
Check out the finalists, and vote for the best law firm swag, after the jump.
Although a number of items were mentioned in the comments to our earlier post, we made very clear in the rules that entries had to be submitted BY EMAIL, with pictures attached. In general, email is our preferred method of communication, because we can ask follow-up questions, verify identity (where necessary), etc. We can't do that with anonymous comments.
Here are the four finalists (in alphabetical order by firm). Pictures of each item appear in the slideshow at the end of this post.
1. ENGRAVED iPODS
Firm: Dobrowski LLP, which our tipster describes as "a small firm that does complex commercial litigation (a.k.a. 'big-firm' work)," in Houston.
The Swag: Summer associates at the firm got iPods -- need we say more? "Pretty sweet," says our source. The custom engraving reflects the trend of individualization.
Pictures: See slides #1 and #2 below.
2. CHANGE YOUR WORLD
Firm: K&L Gates
The Swag: To paraphrase The Matrix, "There is no spoon swag." Explains our correspondent:
K&L Gates has been swagless for the past two years. Rather than spend money on chocolates and other marketing devices that realistically don't sway a law student one way or the other, the firm directed last year's and this year's swag funds to be paid to charities in need. While it is certainly not as sexy or as fun as a bonsai tree, the firm believes that its donations are an excellent alternative use of funds that would normally go swag.
The firm confirmed our tipster's account, through a spokesperson:
We would be interested in sharing some details of a unique recruiting program at K&L Gates entitled Change Your World, which is now in its second year. In short, the firm has decided to donate $20,000 to charity -- money that was previously allocated for recruiting materials. Furthermore, rather than distributing abundant printed material and promotional items to law students, we are instead using an innovative micro Web site, Change Your World, to deliver information about the firm. The site contains an online trivia game where students can compete with each other to determine which charity will receive the $20,000 donation.
It's a snazzy website; we like the design of the 15 monitors devoted to different topics (run your cursor over each). You can play the trivia game even if you're not a law student or K&L Gates recruit. Check out the website here.
Not generating box loads of recruiting materials is environmentally friendly. Donating the money to charity is socially conscious. And having students decide which charity gets the money is a nice example of a user-generated experience -- very Web 2.0.
Pictures: See slide #3 below.
3. CUSTOMIZED NIKE RUNNING SHOES
Firm: Mayer Brown (New York)
The Swag: The firm took the summer associates to the midtown Niketown for an event, where they enjoyed appetizers, an open bar, and the chance to design their own shoes. "It was a cool event," reports our source. "There wasn't a limit on what shoes you could get."
Pictures: "I'd give you a picture of my shoes, but they have my name on the side," our tipster tells us. "You could do name or initials, depending on the shoe model you picked. Also, everybody would recognize them since it was well-established that my shoes were the best. Imagine the shoes in the picture below [slide #4], but way better-looking."
4. A TREE, PLANTED IN YOUR HONOR
Firm: Perkins Coie
The Swag: If you got a callback, the firm arranged to have a tree planted in your name. Says our tipster:
They really upped the ante when it comes to planting the seed of disappointment. In the future, when I visit that majestic national park with my wife and children, I can show them the enduring symbol of a summer job I was never offered.
Still, it's a nice gesture, and yet another example of the "going green" trend.
Picture: We didn't know what kind of tree, but since Perkins Coie has a strong Pacific Northwest presence, we went with a redwood. See slide #5.
(Correction: According to this commenter, it shouldn't be a redwood. Sorry about that!)
Okay, you've seen the contestants. Time to vote! Polls close tomorrow, Thursday, October 15, at 11:59 PM (Eastern time).
Earlier: ATL Contest: Best Law Firm Swag of 2009
(62) Comments
Comments
FIRST to say, I love law firm swag!
The "swag" which I received at my father's preeminent peer law firm was an obscene salary.
Enjoy your engraved iPod (which I could buy with the salary I make in 8 minutes of work).
Looks like Mayer Brown's Nike shoes are running away with the competition.
I just got hired!
Paul Hastings - Monogrammed coat hanger
Your own name on the side of your sneakers is a new low for humanity.
K&L Gates should give its charitable donation to the Human Fund.
What tools at Mayer Brown, holding an event for athletic shoes produced with third world sweatshop labor.
Latham gave everyone a strap on but skimped out on the lube.
Seriously, who cares about f***ing swag. This is the consolation prize to an offer.
9 - You can get both the offer AND the swag.
It's just a fun little contest. Chillax, buddy.
My firm gave me a Val-U-Pak coupon to Rick's Cabaret.
If anyone cares, Redwoods are found in California and generally don't make it north of Southern Oregon in any meaningful way. The trees native to Seattle (home of Perkins) tend to be Douglas Firs (Oregon's state tree) and Western Hemlocks (Washington's state tree). Generally, giveaway seedlings tend to be douglas firs in that neck of the woods.
I never use my firm's iPod nano, but the water bottle remains quality swag.
FIRSTY McFIRSTERSON SAYS:
Can we get an "all this stuff sucks" voting button?
I'm not impressed with the donation to charity because it is really just a warm and fuzzy tax write off for the firm.
10
You're right. Sorry bout being a spaz.
-9
Instead of bonuses this year, my firm will be donating to the Human Fund.
Feeling pretty good about it.
which is it --schwag or swag?
JaKe Emeritus,
I would gladly give you my iPod if you would permit me the extreme gratification of pleasuring myself with your mouth and anus.
Shefeef
Vinson Elkins gave us all bootstraps . . .
Vinson Elkins gave us bootstraps . . .
the mayer brown kid cannot be that stupid. if "everyone" knew his shoe was the best, he's now busted. so send us the damn pic already.
How is a tree not the best? With all the paper used. . .
Way to go Nike Town Tipster. Seriously, good job not posting a picture with your name on a sneaker.
But I have to wonder if your sneakers were the consensus "best" wont people know your tipping off ATL anyway?
8, you got lucky. Latham gave me career herpes.
Does stuff I stole from empty offices on my way out count as swag?
hop up out the bedddd
turn my swag onnnn
People at Howard University get shot for their swag all the time. Its just the way it is.
I'm a 3L that just accepted a permanent offer for god knows when. Do I have swag to look forward to in the meantime? I.e., is it customary for full-time acceptees to get swag?
JaKe,
You may be well compensated but you still have to toil for your daily bread. Derive an obscene income passively through stock and rent and then I'll be impressed. And Shafeef tells me you are as thick as a coke can.
15: Actually, an ipod and a charitable donation have the same tax consequences to a firm. The ipod will be an ordinary business expense, and therefore subtracted from the top line, leading to lower taxable income. Charitable donation works the same--reduction from the top line, leading to lower taxable income. Sorry, I was just feeling nerdy for the moment.
29 – firm name monogrammed antacid tablets.
I think K&L Gates did the right thing but for the wrong reason. You and I both know they wanted the tax deduction on the charitable donation . . . and they probably donated to a group they represent.
I believe 2 won.
"If you got a callback, the firm arranged to have a tree planted in your own."
This sounds painful.
I'm with 15 - not very impressed with the firm giving someone else's money to charity. Now, if all the firm partners had backed that up with an additional $20k out of their own pockets, THAT would impress me. Or if they'd given the swag PLUS the value of the swag to charity, THAT would impress me. I think they should give the money to fund a scholarship for future teachers of America. How about some incentives for teachers? Why should lawyers get all the treats?
My firm gave me a replica BMW M5.
Yo, I'm really happy for you and I'mma let you finish. But, my man Weezy F. Baby got the best swag OF ALL TIME! The best swag OF ALL TIME!
Sorry, 29, you were misinformed. There is nothing permanent about your chosen career path. All positions are temporary until your firm decides to can you.
My firm in Boston gave us Mont Blanc pens.
My firm gave me a copy of Chrometa as swag.
Wow, 39, you're a really lofty thinker, I can tell. To take your point to the next level, nothing is permanent because we all die. This is pretty heady stuff.
Idiot.
-GW 2L
Swag, smag. K&L GaTTTes official offer rate =30%. Unless they're giving out $160K salaries, the swag seems rather irrelevant.
My firm's 100% offer rate is way better than an engraved iPod.
I would really like to get some free, customized Nike running shoes - but those are fucking heinous
Why am I not surprised that most of you dicks voted for the Nikes or the ipod? Me, me, me, me, ME! Who gives a fuck about charity or the environment when you can have a free pair of running shoes?
a sticker with my name and bar code applied to a laptop
"In defense of law firm schwag, here's a trend worth noting: 'going green.'"
Was this just a typo or an intentional pun given that "schwag" is slang for crappy weed--different than "swag" (Stuff We All Get)
12 - nope, no one cares.
Except maybe 35, which was hilarious.
To clear up some confusion that seems to be rampant: "Swag" is not an acronym, and thus does not stand for "Stuff We All Get." It is actually a real noun, and it refers to a largely ornamental piece of crap, more important for its symbolic--rather than functional--purposes.
This entire post is in such poor taste. You do realize that with the economy the way it is, there are law students who don't even have iPods. They have to use Zunes for God's sake. And self-designed Nikes? There are law students out there who don't even have Nikes and must resort to wearing Reeboks or, lord, Adidas. And you realize that there are law students who cannot afford to have trees planted in their honor. Unreal.
This is a profession where all one had to do was graduate from a certain law school and your path was paved with gold. It was gold you could never spend because you were chained to a desk, but paved with gold still sounds pretty cool. Now, there are talented and smart law students who might actually have to work over the summer. 3Ls who realize they might not be paid a king's ransom even though they don't dick about shit. And first years who may actually have to learn how to think like a lawyer...in their first year. How far the mighty have fallen.
Redwood? Geez, time for you New Yorkers to vacation outside of the Hamptons and Martha's Vineyard.
The venerable Douglas fir would be an appropriate response.
-Perkins Coie incoming 2010 summer associate
the law firms really should've taken their summer associates to the Build-A-Bear Workshop.
Build-A-Bear Workshop: Where Best Friends are Made.
This blog no law no more, just crap, just gay. David, you getting too gay.
-Mom
Good point 44. Cuz a 100% offer rate and an engraved ipod are mutually exclusive. How did I not think of that?
Trees are for girls.
Redwoods in Seattle? Really? That's cute.
Are you guys allowed to have trees in NYC? Or does the air have to smell like shit by law?
What kind of crap-ass iPod is that anyway? Isn't that a two-generations-old Nano? Weak.
For the second time this week, I am beginning to agree to agree with Jake Emeritus
JaKe - I've always prided myself on making it on my own - which I think it normal. Why are you so proud about having ridden your dad's coattails?
JaKe - I've always prided myself on making it on my own - which I think it normal. Why are you so proud about having ridden your dad's coattails?
JaKe - I've always prided myself on making it on my own - which I think it normal. Why are you so proud about having ridden your dad's coattails?