It was either a pic of Jenn Sterger or a vampire squid.
* The lawyer tasked with defending Obamacare paces hallways, muttering to himself. Good to hear Asperger’s is not a death sentence anymore. [New York Times]
* Three New Orleans cops were convicted of, well, going Lord of the Flies on some poor guy in the aftermath of Katrina. [CNN]
* Jenn Sterger says she won’t sue if the NFL suspen… you know what? Just click the link. [New York Post]
* So apparently federal prosecutor is a tenured position? [USA Today]
* Wake me up when DADT is actually repealed. Actually, don’t. If I’m sleeping, I doubt I need to be woken up just to find out that DADT has been repealed. That’s an insane reason to be woken up. [Washington Post]
* Vampire squids have rights too. [Los Angeles Times]
* Judge Roberto Pineiro, R.I.P. [Miami Herald]
Binghamton University — best known as the alma mater of the great Tony Kornheiser — is looking for a new president. They are in the process of interviewing a number of candidates, and one of those candidates is a lawyer. Jonathan Alger is the senior vice president and general counsel at Rutgers, and he’s on Binghamton’s shortlist.
Just as importantly, Alger sits on the American Bar Association Accreditation Committee. Naturally the people at Binghamton asked him if he would start a new law school if he took over Binghamton.
Since the man’s on the Accreditation Committee, I’m sure conflicts check flags are going up all over the place. But Alger’s answer may surprise you…
Continue reading “Potential President of Binghamton University Makes Sense When Asked About Founding a New Law School”
* After being bombarded with hurricanes, earthquakes, and cholera, I can hardly blame the people of Haiti for rioting over an election that appears to have been rigged. [BBC]
* A Kansas church will be protesting at Elizabeth Edwards’s funeral. Nobody seems to know why. [WRAL]
* Now the police are getting into the game of spying on you while you check out porn. Oh no, that’s State Action’s music playing. He’s stepping into the ring! This can’t be good. [Forbes]
* Lawyers do NOT make Gawker’s list of ten most depressing jobs in America! Thanks, Cahill Gordon, you came though just in the nick of time. [Gawker]
* Glad to see that Justice Kennedy wields his unimaginable power with such thoughtful deliberation. [Law Librarian Blog]
* David PaTTTerson pardoned six immigrants facing deportation. Apparently he thought it was random and cruel to send them back to… New Jersey. [ACSBlog]
This has not been a great day for lawyers in Indiana. Another Hoosier lawyer, this time at Barnes & Thornburg, just received a public reprimand for patronizing a prostitute (we’re only doing our part to aid in the shaming).
From the National Law Journal (via the ABA Journal):
The Indiana Supreme Court has publicly reprimanded a Barnes & Thornburg attorney for patronizing a prostitute in February.
Hiroaki Nishikawara, of counsel in the law firm’s Indianapolis office, received the reprimand after the court approved an agreement between him and the state’s attorney disciplinary commission. Nishikawara entered into a plea agreement for committing a class A misdemeanor. The agreement required him to perform six hours of community service and attend an impact panel proceeding. The court noted that he had completed the requirements and had no prior criminal history.
Nishikawara declined to comment about the reprimand.
OK, lawyers I get it. You work ridiculously long hours and it’s really hard to meet women at 3 a.m. when you’re ambling out of work. You’ve tried your sweet charm on your secretary and failed.
But the one thing working 89 hours a day has provided you with is money. So hey, at least you can use that.
Right?
Continue reading “Another Lawyer Bites The Dust – Gets Caught With a Prostitute”
Heat makes people crazy. But because Arizona refuses to cut the heat by putting up trees or building an air conditioned dome over the state like I had originally suggested, it has focused its temperature-induced rage on getting rid of illegal immigrants. You’ve no doubt read about the recently enacted Gestapo-flavored law which requires all immigrants to carry proper documentation and gives the Arizona police broad authority to detain individuals suspected of being in this country illegally. But did you know that Arizona hated immigrants at least as far back as 2007?
It’s true. Three years ago, Arizona enacted a law that allows the state to shut down businesses that hire illegal, undocumented workers. And just yesterday, the Supreme Court heard oral arguments about whether the law is preempted by federal immigration law:
Attorney Carter Phillips, representing business and civil rights groups that challenged the law, and Obama administration lawyer Neal Katyal argued the three-year-old Arizona law should be struck down for infringing on federal immigration powers.
Arizona Solicitor General Mary O’Grady defended the law as part of the state’s traditional police powers to regulate employer conduct. A comprehensive 1986 federal immigration law made an exception for licensing laws like the Arizona statute, she said.
Justice Scalia, backed up in spirit by mute wingman Thomas, appeared to defend the law during arguments. But why am I talking about immigration in Fame Brief, a column about celebrites?
Continue reading “Fame Brief: Salma Hayek Brings Heat, Boobs to SCOTUS Immigration Debate”
Happy Holidays, from Gordon & Rees (click on the image to see the card - note that there's music).
Last year we held our first annual contest for law firm holiday cards. It was a fun feature, as well as a big hit with Above the Law readers.
The winner, in a landslide, was Akin Gump. Check out their delightful card, which is still online, over here.
(The clever 2010 holiday card of Manatt, Phelps & Phillips — which the WSJ Law Blog just named as its favorite card for this year — has a punchline that’s reminiscent of last year’s Akin Gump card. But the Manatt card opens with a funny fictionalized firm meeting to discuss the holiday card, which the Akin card did not have.)
We recently received lovely holiday e-cards from two well-regarded firms: Gordon & Rees, a California-based Am Law 200 and NLJ 250 firm, and Much Shelist, a Chicago-based business law firm. You can check out their cards — they both contain music, so you might want to turn your computer’s sound off or use headphones if you’re not alone — by clicking on the images (above right, for Gordon & Rees, and after the jump, for Much Shelist).
These cards reminded us: ’tis the season — for a holiday card contest!
If you’re interested in submitting a law firm holiday card for consideration, please read on for the submission guidelines….
Continue reading “Above the Law’s Second Annual Holiday Card Contest”
Do not mess with this woman.
In general people are not as outraged about domestic violence when the perpetrator is a woman. For whatever reason, people tend to think that male victims of domestic violence “had it coming” in some way. You can make a hit Broadway musical centered around women who kill their husbands — but I’m going to guess that the Wife Beater Waltz wouldn’t do as well as the Cell Block Tango.
So when a woman does decide to beat her boyfriend, it’s kind of nice when she also exhibits additional crazy and violent behavior. At least then, people are less likely to blame the victim.
But maybe Indiana lawyer Olubunmi Okanlami can argue that all of her alleged victims had it coming. Who knows what her boyfriend did or did not do, but Okanlami is an attorney. Maybe when she was arrested for battery she knew enough about the penal system to think that fighting her way out would be more effective than trying to put together a reasonable defense? Some lawyers use the strategy of putting two different legal arguments in their briefs, Okanlami allegedly tried to use two different undergarments to sharpen her attack [UPDATE on her law school after the jump]….
Continue reading “Lawyer of the Day: Indiana Lawyer Accused of Beating Her Boyfriend, Roughing Up Corrections Officer”
Craig Primis of Kirkland & Ellis
Earlier this week, we introduced six Washington, D.C. law firm partners chosen by our readers as the best partners to work for. The next six partners we present to you today come from some of the nation’s finest law firms: Gibson Dunn, Kirkland & Ellis, Latham & Watkins, Orrick, White & Case, and Willkie Farr.
For more information about these firms generally, visit the Career Center.
Without further ado, let’s find out who these premier partners are . . .
Continue reading “Career Center Survey Results: Top Partners to Work for – Washington, D.C. (Part 2)”
Ed. note: This is the latest installment of Inside Straight, Above the Law’s new column for in-house counsel, written by Mark Herrmann.
Business development: What works?
I was on the other side — the law firm side — of the business development coin for 25 years. And those 25 years taught me this about generating business: Raise your profile; stay in touch with people; and get lucky.
I was never once retained by dint of good looks or charm. (Anyone who’s seen or met me won’t find this to be surprising.)
And I don’t play golf.
So what’s a lawyer to do? What business development efforts worked for me, and what might work for you?
Continue reading “Inside Straight: Business Development (Part 1)”
A small law-firm bonus, or a small-law-firm bonus?
It was almost two weeks ago that I, still fat from Thanksgiving turkey, wondered publicly about the status of bonuses at small law firms. Well, it’s time to get the results of that status check.
I recall Elie using the term “anemic” to describe Cravath’s bonus numbers (which were looking like the standard for Biglaw bonuses this year — at least until Cahill came along). Given that, I can only think the term “uber-anemic” is in order here.
Results and charts, after the break.
Continue reading “Small Firm Bonuses: The Results”
* The House passed the DREAM Act last night. My DREAM Act? It involves Jesus, giant eagle’s wings, and Skynyrd. And I’m in the front row, hammered drunk. [Bloomberg]
* Some Oklahomans hate Muneer Awad because he’s “a foreigner” trying to change Oklahoma’s laws. I hate him because he’s a recent law school grad with a job. [USA Today]
* Jurors who blab about their cases online are causing numerous mistrials. Feel free to email your tips to tips@abovethelaw.com or text (646) 820-TIPS. [Reuters]
* Ohio judges are allowed to have Facebook friends, but “(a) judge must maintain dignity in every comment, photograph, dong shot, and other information shared on the social network.” I think I transcribed that right. [ABA Journal]
* Free speech on the internet is tested as Anonymous lashes out at those companies that failed to support Wikileaks. Après Assange, le /b/tard. [New York Times]
* One New Jersey assemblyman’s complaint with the anti-bullying law has to do with taxpayers. The assemblyman, Michael P. Carroll, wrote “Now, every tragedy will come complete with a trial lawyer. And the taxpayers will pick up the tab for these suits.” Unlike before, when tragedies were largely litigation free. [West Virginia Record]
Sarah’s view of America is primitive. You’re either a pointy-headed graduate of Harvard Law School or you’re eviscerating animals for fun, which she presents as somehow more authentic.
— Maureen Dowd of the New York Times, discussing Sarah Palin.
Hopefully you paid attention during middle school sex-ed, because you’re unlikely to learn about the birds and bees at law school.
According a recently released survey by Law Students for Reproductive Justice, only 18 percent of U.S. law schools have offered reproductive rights law courses over the last seven years. More specifically: there have been 37 separate courses and instructor-led reading groups taught at least once, offered at 32 schools located in 17 different states.
Is that good? As future legislators, jurors, advocates or defenders of reproductive rights, do you think you need formal training in the subject? Or is study of the overarching foundations of our legal system sufficient to allow you to take the next Planned Parenthood case that comes into town — or at least talk intelligently about it at parties?
Continue reading “Lawyers, Where Do Babies Come From?”
* SCOTUS could be prepared to uphold Arizona immigration law. Apparently federal law has about the same preemptive effect as the Cravath bonus. [WSJ Law Blog]
* Dahlia Lithwick will be teaching a class at the University of Georgia School of Law. Emory must feel a little bit like Cravath right now; I bet they didn’t see this good fortune going to a competitor.[Atlanta Journal Constitution]
* New York City is not one of America’s most obscene cities, those sounds coming out of the corner offices in your non-Cahill firms notwithstanding. [Business Insider]
* Law professors protest over the plight of unskilled hotel workers. Finding a place that doesn’t exploit its labor force is like trying to find a Cahill in a haystack. [National Law Journal]
* Wikileaks reveals some disturbing “boy parties.” Wish we had some Wikileaks about the cables Evan Chesler is sending right now. [The Legal Satyricon]
* Depositions are a time to man up, not shrink back like Cravath during bonus season. [What About Clients?]
Hey now, this is just coming into our tips box, but we’ve now got two sources reporting that Cahill Gordon will be giving between $15,000 and $20,000 in bonuses to all associate classes this month.
And then giving bonuses according to the standard 2010 Cravath scale in January — “at least” the Cravath scale, according to our tipsters.
UPDATE: We’re up to more sources than I can count. This is solid; Cahill is blowing up the bonus market.
So, some Cahill Gordon associates are going to take home total bonus money that’s $20,000 $35,000 (see the UPDATES after the jump) more than Cravath associates and associates at firms that blindly followed Cravath.
Cahill Gordon, the new definition of competitive market salary in New York City!
But wait, there’s more. Because of the mid-year bonuses that Cahill associates already received, they’re actually making even more money than most of their Biglaw peers (there are UPDATES after the jump)…
Continue reading “Associate Bonus Watch: Cahill Gordon DESTROYS the Cravath Bonus”
Does Polly wanna cracker -- or to be a witness to a crime?
I overuse the words “horrifying” and “terrifying.” Most people do, but I blog, so I probably do it more than most.
But this right here, this is truly horrifying. This is something out of the movie Seven. I’m going to have nightmares over this. And now, so will you.
Let’s check out the allegations….
Continue reading “Most Horrifying Thing You’ll Hear Today”
Biglaw isn’t all about high-stakes mergers and bet-the-company litigation. Many Biglaw firms take their commitment to pro bono very seriously. Obviously, these firms need to pay the bills, first and foremost. But when they can, many firms do try to give back.
As many of you already know, Skadden takes that commitment quite a bit further, with its Skadden Fellows program. We highlight this worthy program every year. The Skadden Fellowships are for law school graduates who want to devote their lives to public service, and the firm makes a major financial commitment to its fellows. From the Skadden Fellows website:
Fellowships are awarded for two years. Skadden provides each Fellow with a salary and pays all fringe benefits to which an employee of the sponsoring organization would be entitled. For those Fellows not covered by a law school low income protection plan, the firm will pay a Fellow’s law school debt service for the tuition part of the loan for the duration of the fellowship. The 2011 class of Fellows brings to 620 the number of academically outstanding law school graduates and judicial clerks the firm has funded to work full-time for legal and advocacy organizations.
It’s a sweet gig if you can get it.
And if you take a look at the list of Fellows — perhaps you know some of them? — you’ll notice that quite a few of them attend the top law schools in the country….
Continue reading “Congratulations to the 2011 Skadden Fellows”
What should a law student do when somebody steals his lunch? Lunch thieves are notoriously hungry; they have no shame when it comes to satisfying their need for other people’s food. And they are sneaky little people, always ready to take your well-prepared sandwich within minutes (or, you know, hours and hours) after you leave it in a communal refrigerator.
So what can law students do against such reckless hate? At Michigan Law, two years ago, the victim of this dastardly crime took to the student listserve and proceeded to excoriate the anonymous person who stole his lunch.
At Boston University Law School, the victim decided against hiding behind a computer screen. Instead he left a note, a really angry note, promising immediate punishment to the lunch thief — by his hand or the hands of fate…
Continue reading “BU Law Student Threatens Beatings and Death to (Non-Existent) Lunch Thief”
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This morning the United States Senate voted to convict Judge G. Thomas Porteous of Louisiana on all four articles of impeachment he faced. These convictions will remove him from his lifetime seat on the federal bench, making him only the eighth federal judge in U.S. history to suffer this fate, and strip him of the $174,000 pension he would have otherwise enjoyed.
Article I accused Judge Porteous, 63, of bringing the federal judiciary “into scandal and disrepute,” as a result of his “corrupt financial relationship” with attorneys appearing before him (who gave him “gifts”). The vote was unanimous: 96-0. Ouch.
Apparently the senators were not persuaded by Professor Jonathan Turley’s argument that Judge Porteous (E.D. La.) wasn’t guilty of high crimes and misdemeanors, but simply “something of a moocher.” Think Kato Kaelin, but in a black robe.
Judge Porteous fared a bit better on the other three articles of impeachment….
Continue reading “Senate Votes to Remove Judge Porteous from the Bench”
