October 2014

* Something called the “Personal Responsibility in Food Consumption Act” is moving through the Minnesota Legislature and is described thusly: “If you eat too much and get fat, you can’t sue the food retailer.” The Scales of Justice. [Grand Forks Herald]

* Lat’s alma mater has started an initiative called “Don’t Filter Me, Bro.” [Yale Daily News]

* Qaddafi’s definitely a lunatic war criminal. A lunatic war criminal with serious swag. [New York Times]

* Labor law, the Wisconsin constitution, representative democracy. Sure, sure, that’s all very important. But what about the human angle? Tell me more about these toiletries you speak of. [Chicago Tribune]

* The Supreme Court is set to hear a case that appears to have been taken straight out of one of Sonia’s favorite telenovelas. [Washington Post]

* A New York couple is suing their lawyers because the kid the couple adopted is defective. I’m not a religious man, but maybe God didn’t allow these people to conceive for a reason? [Daily Mail]

* This Wayne State law student has devoted her life to making all of us look bad. [Detroit Free Press]

* Squash enthusiast Arlen Specter has returned to legal practice as a solo practitioner. [Philadelphia Inquirer]

* After the revolution, Tunisia naturally has moved onto the important business of deciding what to do with the whores. Sex Cauldron??? I thought they closed that place down years ago. [New York Times]

* This article asks why American law enforcement officials aren’t allowed to carry guns in Mexico after two ICE agents were shot there last week. Bunch of sad guitar cases with nothing but guitars. [Examiner.com]

* An Alabama Law grad is attempting to heal the rift between Auburn and Alabama fans caused after the attempted murder of two trees. Roll Tide! It’s rolling, baby! It’s rolling! [ABA Journal]

* Customs officials can go ahead and frisk my hard drive if they want. All they’ll find are lolcats and a folder full of pornography, titled “Tax Documents ’07.” [New York Times]

Amazon Eve

* Freakishly tall woman would like to be a lawyer if modeling doesn’t work out. More importantly, here are some pictures of a freakishly tall model. [AOL News]

* Goat poo securities. [Dealbreaker]

* At some point, we’re going to have to take a closer look at the alleged horse rapist. [News Times]

* Republicans, once again, prove they are made of sterner stuff than wussy liberals. [Huffington Post]

* I just refuse to dignify Malcolm Gladwell with a response about his stupid rankings article. [WSJ Law Blog]

* I’ve been enjoying this caption contest all day long. [Forbes]

* Rick Santorum is getting Googled but good. [Roll Call]

* I feel like Groupon should be much more fun and sexy than it is. [The Lawyerist]

* I don’t want to make fun of Mel Gibson. He’s really not that bad of a dude. He’s looking at me right now. He keeps telling me I’m a darky with a Jewish name. Help Please. [L.A. Times]

A report surfaced yesterday claiming that Howrey has now more or less given itself an end date: March 1, according to the report on Shark Tank Legal.

Partners who have received offers to join Winston & Strawn are expected to accept them by March 1st. After that, Howrey will be in full dissolution mode.

Even Howrey people must want this thing to just be over already. But before the end, we could see more ugliness, like segregated floors to keep the partners with safe landing spots safe from their desperate colleagues…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Howrey Going To Get Out of Here?”

This is a little bit surprising. Not that Linklaters matched spring bonuses. We’re getting to the point that pretty much every firm that wants to be taken seriously is going to have to match spring bonuses.

No, the weird thing is that Linklaters matched the lower level of spring bonuses set by Sullivan & Cromwell, not the more generous spring bonuses adopted by Cravath (and the many firms that have rushed to join them).

Does that strike anybody else as strange? Why get into the spring bonus game at all if you can’t afford the extra thousands of dollars it takes to make a market level payment?

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Associate Bonus Watch: Linklaters Links Spring Bonuses to the S&C Scale, Not Cravath’s”

From “concept searching” to “cloud computing,” every year there are new buzz words and catch phrases that enter into the lexicon of legal technology. Of course, when you are dealing with technology of any sort, you should expect to update jargon regularly (such as from 3G to 4G to 5G, whatever that means).

2011 is shaping up to be no different. This year’s “it” phrase is already emerging in the industry. It evolved from the buzz words of yesteryear, and if this new phraseology is worth its salt, these new advances could drastically change how law is practiced for years to come.

So what is legal technology’s newest terminology?

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “The Next Big ‘Buzz Words’ in Legal Technology”

Ed. note: Have a question for next week? Send it in to advice@abovethelaw.com.

Dear ATL,

One of the things I don’t like about your blog is that you never have anything for Biglaw Bros who are just looking to use their jobs and money to score chicks. It’s fine to talk about women’s issues, debt issues, layoff issues and all that stuff. But aside from casual references to “models and bottles” you don’t seem interested in actually helping dudes who want to find pretty, young, not-too-intelligent slam pieces “on the reg.”

— What About Us?

Marin, the usual author of this column, is on vacation this week — which is probably why I get to address this question that was hurled at me while I was trying to watch the AFC Championship game. I’ll do my best Marin impersonation (if you promise not to tell her), and see if we can’t get the “bros” in our audience pointed in the right direction…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Pls Hndle Thx: BroTips”

I wouldn’t have felt good about [Gerald Ung] going to jail for 40 years for a bad decision made in 70 seconds. If he went to jail, it doesn’t take back the year of recovery and rehabilitation my brother has had to endure. There’s no malice towards the shooter here. And I wish his supporters would feel the same towards my brother. These are two guys who didn’t know each other who were thrown into an irreversible situation that ended horribly….

The truest thing I know is that a handgun should not have been on an intoxicated individual at 2 a.m. This is bigger than this specific situation. This is a societal issue that unfortunately has and will continue to kill and maim countless individuals because no one is willing to to say, “Enough is enough.”

— the sister of Eddie DiDonato, on her blog (gavel bang: commenter).

We’ve been trying to figure out how many top New York firms will adopt spring bonuses. It doesn’t appear that Schulte Roth & Zabel will be one of them.

Multiple tipsters report Schulte Roth conducted staff layoffs earlier this week.

But maybe we shouldn’t jump to the conclusion that this means Schulte will not be paying spring bonuses. Is it possible that this move will free up money for a spring payout?

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Staff Layoff Watch: Schulte Roth Has A Different Kind of Spring Surprise”

Canadian police might not know the difference between law students, Kim Cattrall, and victims of sexual assault.


You know, I kind of get what this police officer was trying to say. When speaking in front of a group of law students at Osgoode Hall Law School, a Toronto cop told women they could avoid sexual harassment and assault by not dressing like sluts.

As a black person, I’ve heard similar things. If you don’t want to get racially profiled, “don’t dress like a gangbanger” and all that. And that kind of advice is true to some extent. It’s not “fair,” but you have to be aware of how you present yourself.

The thing is, what kind of idiot white male cop thinks that female law students don’t already know this? I think women at a law school in Canada know damn well that they can’t walk around campus dressed only in a bra and hot pants. They should be able to walk around in whatever the hell they like without being sexually assaulted, but they know how the world works.

When did dress sense become a safety tip?

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Police Tell Female Law Students ‘Don’t Dress Like a Slut’ To Avoid Sexual Assault”

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