October 2014

Does this look like 'lunch' to you?

Did you show up to work on time this morning? Did you? You better show up to work on time, every day, or else Gary K. Shipman will come and get you.

Don’t know who Gary Shipman is? Well, you are about to. He has his own small law firm in North Carolina, and he is goddamn tired of people showing up to work late. And yeah, 9:00 a.m. is late, according to Shipman. Hey, you don’t get highlighted in the Wilmington Star News for your “aggressive nature” and “work ethic” without starting to bust heads at 8:30.

I guess when you have your own firm, you can send around any email you want — even slightly nonsensical emails about when “lunch hour” is supposed to start…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Founding Partner Warns: ‘Get Your Ass To Work’”

Jay Z (aka Shawn Corey Carter)

* A Libyan woman is being sued for slander over her rape allegations. Is this how the Libyan militiamen serve and protect their country? [Boston Globe]

* Call this one a learning experience. Pictures of things we now know we can’t post on Facebook: placentas, dead girls. [CNN Justice]

* Jay-Z is down to 98 problems, and that bitch Big Papi ain’t one. [New York Daily News]

* Are your tiny balls a matter of public record? Jason Giambi’s are after testifying at the Barry Bonds trial. [Bloomberg]

* Law firms will now receive a gold star if their women are making it rain. Guess my firm is out, I’m only making it hail. [National Law Journal]

* Michigan’s Attorney General, Bill Schuette, is suing a clinic offering non-peer abortions. [Chicago Tribune]

* Protip: if you’re going to pistol-whip your mom until she buys you a car, at least force her to buy you a new one. [ABA Journal]

In my earlier story about Justice Antonin Scalia’s fender-bender on the George Washington Parkway, I tossed out a question: What kind of car does Justice Scalia drive?

A few years ago, Justice Scalia drove a BMW. Is Nino still partial to Bimmers, or has he switched his automotive allegiances?

Now we know the answer — and more about the accident, including whether Justice Scalia was at fault….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “The Wheels of Justice (Scalia): Will Nino Fight His Traffic Ticket?”


[There wasn't] some dramatic meeting in the Oval Office where everybody tried to persuade the president not to do this, and Samantha rolled in with her flowing red hair and said, ‘Mr. President, I stand here alone in telling you that history calls upon you to perform this act.’ That’s not how it happened.

Tom Malinowski, Washington Director for Human Rights Watch, refuting speculation that U.S. military intervention in Libya was the handiwork of his good friend, Samantha Power.

(As longtime ATL readers will recall, Samantha Power is the beautiful, brilliant, Harvard-trained lawyer who is currently a top foreign policy adviser to President Obama — and who famously called Hillary Clinton “a monster” during the 2008 presidential campaign (and then resigned from the campaign). Power is now married to prominent Harvard law professor and fellow Obama adviser Cass Sunstein. You can read about their wedding here, and see exclusive ATL photos of them here.)

* I hate crappy customer service as much as the next guy; I just hope UCLA law students from “third world s**tholes” aren’t offended. [Professor Bainbridge]

* Forgive my ignorance, but I don’t see why the right has a problem with the Employment Non-Discrimination Act. They know you don’t catch “the gay” from working with gays. I mean, I’m still as straight as an arrow. [Bilerico]

* A very thorough Wal-Mart v. Dukes linkwrap — big enough to be discounted at Wal-Mart. [How Appealing]

* As long as we’re thinking of giving prosecutors bonuses, let’s also grant them the right of prima nocta over the wives of any men they convict. The latter idea is just as stupid as the former. [Overlawyered]

* While law students suffer in unemployment and tuition continues to spiral upwards, law professors have decided to draw a line in the sand over tenure. In related news, 18 law professors have been hospitalized after attempting to wedge their heads up their own asses. [TaxProf Blog]

* Law school valedictorians are so socially awkward that they need this advice. [Law Riot]

* What lessons can we learn from the demise of Howrey? [Law 360 (via Hellerman Baretz)]

I feel like there should be a student protest reality show.

Too often, people act like post-graduation unemployment is a malady that affects only students at lower-ranked law schools. People act like only lazy students at third-tier institutions — or “rank not published” institutions, if you prefer — end up desperate for work after three years of legal education.

But we know better. We know that the threat of unemployment is very real to all law school students. Sure, the higher-ranked schools might do a better job of getting their students jobs, at least in percentage terms; but even top schools have students who want to work but cannot find jobs.

Students at one top-ten law school are sick of suffering in silence. They want everybody, especially admitted students, to know that going to an elite law school doesn’t guarantee you a good job.

Given the state of the legal economy and the cost of law school tuition, it’s a wonder that this kind of thing doesn’t happen more often….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Law Students at a Top School Protest Continued Unemployment”

In parts one, two and three of the Career Center “Tip of the Day” series, focused on how junior associates can become more indispensable to their law firms, we covered the importance of taking ownership of your work, becoming an expert in your field, and developing effective management strategies. Today, we’ll discuss a point that sounds obvious but has some subtleties: following the rules.

These tips are provided by the experienced recruiters at Lateral Link, who, in addition to providing sound career advice, can advance your career by consulting with you on the hundreds of law firm and in-house positions they have in their network.

Now, on to tip #4….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “How to Become an (Almost) Indispensable Junior Associate (Part 4)”

Ed. note: Have a question for next week? Send it in to advice@abovethelaw.com.

Dear ATL,

I am an aspiring law student getting ready to send off my law school application.  However, I have a problem: I can’t go to the only law school that makes sense for me; not because I did not score well enough, but because of an American Bar Association rule whose blanket coverage does not really apply in its intended sense to my situation.  The rule deals with not allowing anyone to attend a full time law program while working more than 20 hours per week.

Currently, I have my full time dream job as New York City fireman and, honestly, I could not imagine quitting it for anything.  However, it does not mean that obtaining my J.D. and having the opportunity to give back more to the community and stimulate my mind on my days not at the firehouse is not also an aspiration of mine.  Unfortunately, it seems that both of my dreams cannot be achieved in an economically feasible manner.  Only one of the schools in the area is a state school and affordable (see: rational) for me to attend, but they only offer a full time program….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Pls Hndle Thx: Should New York’s Bravest Brave Law School?”

The wheels of justice might have taken a wrong turn today. It seems that Justice Antonin Scalia had some minimum contacts — with another vehicle, on a highway outside D.C.

According to a Supreme Court spokesperson, Justice Scalia was involved in a minor car accident this morning, while heading in to One First Street to hear oral argument in Wal-Mart v. Dukes. The accident took place on the George Washington Parkway (a tricky road to drive on, as I know from my time spent in Washington).

Justice Scalia — my personal favorite among the justices, for his brilliance, wit, colorful personality, and unmatched writing skill — was thankfully not injured. He made it on to the bench in time for the Tuesday oral argument session.

What kind of car does Justice Scalia drive?

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Justice Scalia Gets Caught in a Fender-Bender”

This is what greeted me when I logged into my Twitter account this morning:

Alas, the Howrey Twitter feed hasn’t been updated since February 9.

In terms of more active feeds, please feel free to follow Above the Law (or yours truly, or Elie Mystal).

You can also follow many leading legal commentators, including several of ATL’s outside contributors, by checking out the feeds that we’re following here at Above the Law, or our list of Favorite Legal Tweeps. Happy tweeting!

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