Johnathan Perkins
Today is Commencement at UVA Law School. Congratulations to all of the UVA students who will soon become UVA alumni. You’ve worked hard for your law degrees, and you deserve commendation.
(Hopefully you have jobs lined up. Or at least other talents that can help you make a living — and pay back your student loans.)
Is Johnathan Perkins, the 3L who famously (or infamously) admitted making up a story about how he was racially profiled and harassed by university police, going to receive a J.D. degree from UVA Law — today, or in the future?
Let’s discuss. We have some evidence….
Continue reading “Is Johnathan Perkins, aka the UVA Law Fabulist, Going to Graduate?”
Judge Rae Lee Chabot
Society has a deal with judges. We don’t pay them very well — but, in exchange for salaries that are much lower than what they could earn in the private sector, they get to do whatever they heck they want. And get to be addressed as “Your Honor,” and wear really cool black robes.
One of the perks of judicial office is that it isn’t a nine-to-five job. Judges don’t have to punch a time clock; they come and go as they please. Court isn’t court until the judge takes the bench.
As long as a judge is reasonably current with his docket, he should be left alone. There is no face-time requirement for judges. (Sure, judges have to be on the bench for trials and oral arguments and such — but that’s not “face-time,” since the judge’s presence is actually necessary for the proceedings.)
In light of all this, I’m puzzled by the controversy over Judge Rae Lee Chabot. Judge Chabot has served on the Oakland County Circuit Court in Michigan for over 10 years.
Sure, the allegations about how she spends her days are amusing — and we’ll name her our Judge of the Day, just for the heck of it. But is there really a problem here?
Continue reading “What’s Wrong With Three-Hour Lunches and Shopping at the Gap?”
Dana Delany
* Do you need to teach your wife a lesson? Allegedly, there’s an app for that. [Fox News]
* K&L Gates provides a soft landing place for David DeNinno, the former Reed Smith partner who was called out in JoEllen Lyons Dillon’s sex discrimination lawsuit. [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette]
* Delaware Chancellor William Chandler has decided to cash his chips in with Wilson Sonsini. [WSJ Law Blog]
* Can’t a girl date a drug dealer and prosecute the men accused of trying to kill him without everybody getting all worked up about it? [Philadelphia Inquiry]
David DeNinno
* Can the Canadian government tax poker winnings? Then why can’t Canadian poker players write off poker losses as tax deductions? [Canadian Lawyer Mag]
* Sounds like the D.C. Medical Examiner’s Office needs Bones, or Dana Delany or something. [Underdog]
* Hey, Republicans, can you actually come up with a presidential candidate who was actually against Obamacare before a Democrat got it passed? It’ll make your protestations against the law seem less intellectually dishonest. [Huffington Post]
In our view, no bail is required to ensure Mr. Strauss-Kahn’s appearance. He is an honorable man. He has only one interest at this time and that is to clear his name.
– William W. Taylor III, a partner at Zuckerman Spaeder, at a bail hearing for his client, former IMF head Dominique Strauss-Kahn.
(The New York Times article quoting Taylor also notes that a plan for DSK to live in a luxury building on the Upper East Side was nixed, after building residents objected.)
Try telling a recent college grad to think critically before applying to law school. Just try to do it. It won’t be long before the young person you are trying to help gets inappropriately angry and shouts, “Well what AM I supposed to do, you fat f**k? Seriously oh wise internet blogger, what the hell am I supposed to do, work at Barnes & Noble? Oh wait, they’re not hiring, a$$hole.”
Yeah, recent college grads tend to act like going to law school (or some other professional school or post-graduate degree program) is their only option in a market that doesn’t have enough jobs. Citing the results of a recent poll taken by Twentysomething Inc., Time reports that 85% of 2011 college graduates are expected to move back in with their parents. (Gavel bang: BL1Y.)
Honestly guys, this is how riots start. Unemployed adults living in forced infancy without enough money to start a family of their own. That’s the tinder that has brought down pretty much every society ever.
The report reiterates what we already know: people are turning to professional school to wait out this terrible job market.
In the face of these numbers… well, I still think that people going to law school simply in response to a difficult job market are making a terrible and ruinous choice. Here’s why….
Continue reading “So This Is Why People Keep Applying To Law School”
Today’s Job of the Week, brought to you by Lateral Link, presents a great opportunity for a corporate associate to move to one of the premier firms on the West Coast. If you are looking for a firm with a top-notch M&A practice and a collegial work environment, then check out the opportunity below.
Position: M&A Associate
Location: Los Angeles (Century City)
Description: A California-based firm, known for its entertainment-related work, is seeking a mid-senior level associate (class years 2002 – 2006), to join their M&A practice. Candidates should have a strong general corporate and M&A background. Experience in private equity fund formation is a plus. Superior academic credentials are required.
For more information about this position, please view Position #8843 on Lateral Link; current Members may contact their personal search consultant for this or other corporate opportunities in California. Non-members can contact Ryan Belville, at rbelville@laterallink.com for more information.
Not a Lateral Link member, but want details on this or hundreds of other openings? Register for free at www.laterallink.com to work with an attorney recruiter who is an expert in your market. Click here to learn more the professional recruiters at Lateral Link.
Of course this happened. Of course Andrew Meyer, the University of Florida student who was famously tased during a John Kerry speech, ended up going to law school. Of course a law school looked at Meyer’s history of barely civil disobedience and resisting police and said, “Come on down.”
And really, Meyer’s story isn’t even the craziest law school matriculation story out there today. Not in a world where a 15-year-old kid is trying to figure out which law school he’s going to.
Which institutions of legal education are welcoming these students with non-traditional life stories?
Continue reading “Tased Bro Goes To Law School”
The good folks over at Building A Better Legal Profession — a national grassroots movement that we’ve written about before, which seeks market-based workplace reforms in large private law firms — have updated their online directory and rankings of law firms with new information for 2011. The updated rankings shed light on which top law firms are excelling in such areas as diversity and pro bono work, and which ones still have some work to do.
Let’s look at some highlights from the new data, on such subjects as diversity, partnership, and associate attrition….
Continue reading “New Data on Law Firm Diversity”
We know that tuition keeps going up at American law schools. And, for the most part, we know where the money goes. Law schools use tuition money and alumni donations to fund capital projects and law professor salaries. And, at some schools, the law school kicks back some money to the larger university. Law schools are cash cows, and everybody likes money.
Who is to blame for this? It’s hard to say. I tend to blame the American Bar Association, since the ABA is one of the few entities with regulatory authority over legal education (some law students are trying to get the Department of Education involved).
If the ABA will not act, it’s only natural for people to make as much money as possible, with reckless disregard to who gets trampled along the way. But one can find other culprits if you look hard enough. You could blame law school administrators, who are more concerned with money than education. You could blame the students themselves, for willingly forking over all of this cash. You could blame the federal government, for seemingly giving away money without making sure the taxpayers are getting a return on their investment.
But you know who you shouldn’t blame? Law school faculty. That’s right — they might get fancy new buildings and make six-figure salaries, but it’s not really their fault that the cost of a legal education has outstripped its value.
Who among us would not take more money and more perks for doing our same job?
Continue reading “Your Tuition Dollars Hard At Work”
Legal recruiters find work for lawyers — and sometimes they create work for them. We previously covered, for example, the litigation between mega-recruiter Major Lindsey & Africa and one of its former employees, Sharon Mahn.
Sometimes recruiters go after each other, and sometimes they go after law firms — firms that don’t pay them the placement fees to which they’re entitled. Recruiter Alan Miles, principal of Alan Miles and Associates, went after Bingham McCutchen — and won, big time.
How much did Miles win? And on what grounds?
Continue reading “Lawsuit of the Day: Bingham Must Pay Seven-Figure Sum to Legal Recruiter”
Maria Shriver
* A former Ropes & Gray attorney caught up in the Galleon Group insider trading scandal, Brien Santarlas, testified yesterday that he was paid thousands of dollars for tips. Then, he was told “to dispose of the phone — break it in half, submerge it in water and put it in a garbage can.” He was also told to “Fart on it, dredge it in panko bread crumbs, and talk mess about its momma.” [Bloomberg]
* A candidate to succeed Dominique Strauss-Kahn as head of the IMF, former Baker & McKenzie chairman Christine Lagarde, may have a legal problem of her own. A less rapey one, but still. [Reuters]
* Maria Shriver has retained prominent divorce attorney Laura Wasser, but has not decided whether to divorce Ahnuld or not. Every decent Arnold Schwarzenegger joke has been done, so here’s Jean-Claude Van Damme dancing. [CBS News]
* An Oregon woman has won her fight to get high and carry a handgun. A three-episode arc on Cops is still being negotiated. [WSJ Law Blog]
* Vivia Chen continues her impeccable trolling with a post on lawyers who were voted “most likely to succeed” in high school. Money quote: “If you’re in law, odds are slim that you came within breathing distance of cheerleaders or star athletes.” [The Careerist]
* The owners of the Mets considered buying fraud insurance for their Madoff money in 2001. Instead, they traded for Mo Vaughn. Bad Idea Jeans. [New York Times]
You have the tools to build your own life.
Another day, and another round-up of terrible job opportunities available to J.D. holders. I think it’s important to continue bringing these jobs to your attention. I think it’s important to have a place on the web where people can go to answer the question: Why is it a big deal if Indiana Tech opens another law school? Somebody needs to keep an eye on what future graduates from such institutions will be doing for a living.
Today we’ve got two God-awful job opportunities. As we’ve said repeatedly, you can’t get on our radar as a terrible job unless you are offering something more interesting than low pay for overqualified individuals (though offering a Depression era hourly wage is always a good start).
Check out these two jobs, which add the insult to injury that unemployed J.D. holders are really looking for…
Continue reading “Today’s Terrible Jobs Have A ‘Do It Yourself’ Feel”
* Dominique Strauss-Kahn has been indicted. When reached for comment, Khan said: “You task me. You can chase me around the moons of Nibia and around the Antares Maelstrom and around Perdition’s flames before I give up!” [ABC News]
* But he’s been granted bail. In response, Ordell Robbie put it this way: “He put himself in a position where he was going to have to do ten years in prison, that’s what he did. And if you know [Dominique], you know ain’t no god damn way he can do ten years. And if you know that, then you know [Dominique's] gonna do anything [Dominique] can to keep from doing them ten years, including telling the federal government any and every motherf***ing thing about my black ass.” [WSJ Law Blog]
* Please bring me the school principal who had four people willing to teach in a poor elementary school but decided to be racist towards those teachers because they are white so that I may slap him upside his head. I hope Dr. Frank Naiper tells him: “you will write a formal apology for your treatment of [the white teachers]. You will kow tow. You will step and fetch… because contrary to popular opinion, I’m the head n****r in charge!” [The Root]
* The FBI wants some Unabomber DNA. We spoke with special agent Clarice Starling who said she asked Kaczynski: “But are you strong enough to point that high-powered perception at yourself? What about it? Why don’t you – why don’t you look at yourself and [give me a cheek swab]? Or maybe you’re afraid to.” [Salon]
* A Republican doesn’t think the U.S. defaulting on its debts would be so bad? Egon disagrees: “Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.” [Huffington Post]
* Four more years of the Patriot Act. Progressives tried to reason with Patriot Act supporters but Jack Ryan said: I don’t give a s**t whether you [like] it or not. But if you don’t help me, I will put such a stranglehold on your [entitlement] money that your boys will be out in the streets throwing rocks! I will f***ing destroy you! I will make it my mission in life! [Politicore]
Welcome, summer associates!
Summer is almost here, which means summer associates will begin working at major law firms around the world. Will you be summering at one of the law firms profiled below? If you are a Biglaw summer associate and want to know what firm associates really think about the firm you are clerking at, check out the Career Center for great insight on all the leading firms.
- Formal training and mentoring are big at this firm, but some associates still feel ill-prepared to handle the actual work they are assigned. As one of the first U.S.-based firms to expand internationally, it can be “sink or swim,” according to Lateral Link members, and there is virtually no chance at becoming partner here. Still, the firm is considered a market leader with respect to family leave and has one of the highest average percentages of new female partners.
- Associates at this top-tier firm, known for its intellectual property practice, enjoy the collaborative work environment as well as the manageable work hours. It is a free-market system when it comes to work assignments, but associates in the firm’s satellite offices warn that work may be hard to come by relative to the associates in the main office. With a five- to six-year partnership track and a minimum billable requirement of 1,750, becoming partner is a realistic goal for most associates here.
More profiles, after the jump.
Continue reading “Career Center: Summer Associate Caveat Emptor – What Are Associates Really Thinking?”
If you ask me, I think that the insights offered in this column are all that you need to succeed as a small-firm attorney. I have received many emails, however, suggesting that facts might be as valuable as my opinions. Of course, that’s crazy.
Recently I received an email from a young small-firm associate who wrote that he was going to ask his boss for a raise but, unlike Biglaw, he had no idea what other associates at comparable firms were making. He appreciated the survey results given by my predecessor, Josh Dickinson (available here and here), but he wanted more specificity. And only 650 people responded to the previous survey, the majority of them junior associates who were relatively new to small-firm practice. Let’s see if we can do better than that.
Please click here to take the survey.
If we get enough responses, I will attempt to compile results that offer the information available to Biglaw associates (i.e., average salary per class year for __ hours billed in ___ city).
Knowledge is power, my friends. Maybe we can all ask for a raise (except for the lucky few who make the amounts we will ask for). Or, if we all make too little, maybe we can arrange a little gathering, a la Madison, Wisconsin.
Small Firm Compensation Survey [Survey Monkey]
When not writing about small law firms for Above the Law, Valerie Katz (not her real name) works at a small firm in Chicago. You can reach her by email at Valerie.L.Katz@gmail.com and follow her on Twitter at @ValerieLKatz.
Reports indicate that cloture has not been invoked for Goodwin Liu’s nomination to the Ninth Circuit. That means the filibuster is still on. That means he’s going to be a law professor, not a judge (at least until the next election cycle).
Senators Susan Collins (R-ME), Olympia Snowe (R-ME), and the totally [curse words] Ben Nelson (Something – NE) all voted against Liu. Game, set, match.
Maybe Goodwin Liu and Miguel Estrada should start a support group.
UPDATE (2:40 PM): The vote to end debate failed, 52-43; 60 votes were required.
Senate votes on cloture for Goodwin Liu confirmation [Daily Kos]
Lawyers love to talk about how technology always moves faster than the law. Nowhere is that tension more apparent (and sadistically fun to observe) than within the mean streets of Facebook. We’ve covered legal standards surrounding Facebook before — and it never gets old.
This week, a defense attorney in a personal injury case learns that just because you ask to be someone’s Facebook pal, that doesn’t mean they have to say yes. Even if you ask through the court system and your would-be “friend” happens to be suing your client for car-crash injuries.
A shocking revelation, right? Details after the ol’ jump.
Continue reading “I’m Suing You, So No, We Can’t Be Facebook Friends”
Benesch Apportunity
Law firm marketing and technology don’t always go well together. When firms try to go high-tech, the results are often mortifyingly cheesy.
To avoid humiliation, many law firms — often culturally conservative, risk-averse institutions — play it safe. But caution can also result in some of the worst law-firm websites, ones that get compared to “a seventh-grade history project” or “[s]imply a brochure placed online.”
Sometimes, however, a law firm gets tech right. Check out the new iPhone / iPad app developed by the Benesch law firm, the subject of a nice write-up in the Cleveland Plain Dealer (via Morning Docket).
What does the app, called “Benesch Apportunity,” actually do? And might other law firms want to implement similar apps?
Let’s learn more….
Continue reading “Finding a Legal Job? There’s an App for That”
It takes a big man to ignore a small issue.
A lawyer who lacks self-confidence feels compelled to run down every issue, make every argument, and depose every witness. After all, if you choose to make an educated guess about the importance of a tangential issue, or whether to omit a plausible (but likely losing) argument from a brief, or whether to incur the cost of deposing a just-barely-relevant witness, all may be lost. You might lose the case, and the recriminations would never stop. Better to leave no stone unturned than to leave yourself at risk of being second-guessed.
That’s one reason to hire lawyers with a little self-confidence. They’re willing to take intelligent risks where it makes sense to do so.
Which brings us to the topic of today’s post: Compliance due diligence.
If your company’s considering an acquisition, you can simply outsource the entire compliance due diligence process. Hire Big Firm, ask it to handle due diligence, and wait for the results. No muss, no fuss.
And, at the end of the day, no deal.
No deal, but lots of legal expense.
Why?
Continue reading “Inside Straight: Compliance Due Diligence”
Every so often, we need to ask the question: Why do lawyers have to run law firms? Just because that’s the way it always has been doesn’t mean that it’s the right way to do things. Law is a business — obviously — so why can’t business people run them?
Things are the way they are now because of legal ethics rules barring non-lawyer ownership of legal practices. That’s not the only way to do it; England and Australia have no such bans.
We do in America, but hey, laws can change. At least that’s what Jacoby & Meyers is hoping.
Yeah, that Jacoby & Meyers….
Continue reading “Because Walmart Really Should Be Allowed To Own A Law Firm”
