It’s been almost a month since our last post on law-related vanity license plates. We got a great response to our call for photos, but we could always use some more. So, if you’re a fan of the Law License Plates series, please send in your photos via email (subject line: “Vanity License Plate”).

Both of these submissions came to us from my current home state: Massachusetts. In case you didn’t know, this will be my fifth year in the good old Commonwealth, land of some of the worst drivers in the world. And after seeing these vanity license plates, I am even more excited to leave.

Looking at these plates was a bit like looking into a crystal ball. Are you ready to see your future?

This picture was taken at the Essex County Registry of Deeds. Somewhere in up in northeast Massachusetts, this poor guy is trying to pimp out his profession on a car that looks like it needs some help from Xzibit à la: “Yo dawg, I heard you like being a lawyer, so I put ESQUIR on your plates so you can be douche even when you drive.” Our tipster noted:

I’m not sure what’s more sad: the douchey-ness of the actual license plate, or the fact that it’s on an incredibly beat up, old Ford Taurus. This could be the poster of the “don’t go to law school” campaign.

Good point. Am I doomed to drive a piece of crap? This is the same color as my current car, except I don’t have that many scratches on the bumper. I can drive, unlike most Massachusetts license-holders. Will I ever get to write ESQUIR on my plates? At this point, I don’t really care. I’m more afraid of becoming like the mom featured in our next submission.

Oh Lord. This picture was taken in downtown Boston. Our tipster said that JD LADY isn’t a very good driver. I don’t blame her, though — it’s hard to navigate the mean streets of Beantown as a Texan in a minivan.

Maybe JD LADY bought this beauty because she popped out some quints after the MBE, and it was filled with her horde of Toddlers & Tiaras contestants. Either way, it must be a sad existence to be a lawyer mom with enough kids to fill a minivan.

So readers, do you see your futures in these vanity license plates? I seriously hope not.

Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of vanity license plates


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