* Cozen O’Connor is caught between the parents and lesbian partner of a deceased attorney in a death benefits war. Lawyers’ fees will eat through that profit-sharing plan in no time. [Philadelphia Inquirer]

* Because everything’s bigger in Texas, they’ve got the seventh-largest lawyer surplus in the country. Wrangling a job at the employment rodeo is going to be tough this year. [Texas Lawyer]

* The Betty Ford worker suing Lindsay Lohan for $1M claims she isn’t in it for the money. She just wants to teach LiLo a lesson. I don’t think she needs a lesson in how to write a check. [Radar Online]

* Think you’re getting screwed at your job? Carroll Shelby’s alleged liquor ‘n porn run grope girl definitely has you beat. [Fox News]

* In his second lawsuit this month, Jersey Shore’s Situation is being sued because he refuses to wear things from his own clothing line. DILLIGAF? [Riptide 2.0 / Miami New Times]

* Much to many a tweens’ chagrin, there is no such thing as a constitutional right to be a high school cheerleader. [Chattanooga Times Free Press]


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