It’s time for on-campus interviewing. All across the country, law students are stuffing themselves into business suits and prostrating themselves on the floors of some of the nation’s finest campus hotels.
It’s a stressful time. New law students might show up at law school having done no research into the legal job market, but after one short year the kids start to wise up. They realize, some for the first time, that 90% of them will not be in the top ten percent of the class. They realize that if they don’t get one of the handful of high-paying jobs, they’ll be relegated to gladiatorial combat for the low-paying leftovers. They realize, as rising 2Ls, that maybe they should have listened to everybody who warned them about law school in the first place.
But they know they can make it all go away if they are successful during OCI. If only they can wow the law-firm interviewers who show up on campus.
The problem is that for many law students, especially those at schools ranked outside the top national institutions, their OCI fate was decided long before they shook the hand of any interviewer.
One tipster is just now realizing that, and he is understandably pissed….
Continue reading “Quinn OCI Irks Fordham Law Kids, But Maybe They Should Blame Fordham”
Jason Smiekel
It’s not every day that a lawyer is accused of murder for hire. But that’s what happened earlier this month, when Illinois lawyer Jason W. Smiekel was accused of trying to put a hit out on a former client — who also happened to be the ex-husband of Smiekel’s current girlfriend (or fiancée).
Last week, the feds unveiled the indictment against Jason Smiekel (who was originally charged by complaint). At his arraignment last Wednesday, Smiekel pleaded not guilty to seven counts of using interstate facilities in a murder-for-hire scheme.
Since his arrest, we’ve heard from friends and colleagues of Jason Smiekel, 29, who claim that he’s getting a bum rap. They claim that blame for this unfortunate series of events should be located… elsewhere.
“How come no one is talking about his ‘girlfriend’?” asked one reader. “She needs to be questioned as well.”
So, let’s talk about that girlfriend — the one that an ATL tipster described as a “hot hot hot blonde”….
Continue reading “Chicago-Area Lawyer Accused of Murder for Hire Pleads Not Guilty
(And ATL readers come to his defense.)“
Last week, I referenced my boyfriend when writing about marriage. Today, I’m writing about marriage again, but now I get to reference my fiancé. Seriously, how cool is that?
I’m extremely excited about our engagement, but being a future bride is a tough job (even for someone with a Type A personality). There are just so many things involved in planning a wedding. We’re talking about things like the venue, the flowers, the band, the dress… good lord, especially the dress! The dress is actually my number one priority right now; in fact, in order to avoid looking like the Stay Puft marshmallow bride, I hired a personal trainer.
But now that I’m a member of the bridal class of 2012 (or 2013, we shall see), I can commiserate with the woes of my fellow brides-to-be. And in this case, I can’t even begin to imagine what I would do if I was denied the dress of my dreams simply based on the person I chose to love….
Continue reading “‘No Dress for You!’ A New Jersey Bridal Boutique Goes ‘Gown Nazi’ on a Lesbian Bride-to-Be”
How much do other people have to know?
This question comes up in many different contexts, and answering it always requires a little judgment.
At law firms, the questions often involve what the partner or the client needs to know. These people are supposed to be kept in the loop, but that task may be trickier than it seems. You want people to be fully informed, but you don’t want to become a pest, constantly alerting people to irrelevant trifles. What’s a person to do?
The answer varies by many things, including the nature of the matter you’re working on, the compulsiveness of the person you’re working with, the degree of trust established between you and the person you’re working with, time pressure, and the like. To the extent it’s possible, though, let’s establish some general rules….
Continue reading “Inside Straight: Keeping People In The Loop”
We all know Michele Bachmann as the Tea Party darling running for the Republican presidential nomination. Before that, Bachmann the Congresswoman became famous for making some of the most truly ignorant statements in modern American politics.
But few people know that before Bachmann became a crazy-eyed, anti-tax standard bearer, Bachmann was a lawyer. A tax lawyer. Working for the IRS. That’s right, as a lawyer Bachmann helped the government collect taxes.
But I wouldn’t call her a hypocrite. It seems she wasn’t all that good at collecting taxes….
Continue reading “As A Lawyer, Bachmann Worked For The Tax Collectors”
The 'scamblogging' law professor has revealed himself.
Earlier this month, we wrote about an anonymous law professor — a tenured professor, at a top-tier school — essentially joining the ranks of the law school scambloggers. Writing over at a site entitled Inside the Law School Scam, under the pseudonym LawProf, the author offered a harsh indictment of legal education, purportedly from within the ivory tower.
I believed that the author was who he said he was, but others did not. Professor Ann Althouse, for example, opined that the blogger was a student, “uncharitably projecting thoughts onto [a] professor” (who talked about how little he, and his colleagues, prepared for teaching). Professor Althouse explained that she thought was student-written, “because it had some bad writing and simplistic thinking.”
Well, as it turns out, LawProf is an actual tenured law professor, at a top 50 law school. Who is he, and where does he teach?
Continue reading “The Tenured Law Prof Turned ‘Scamblogger’ Reveals Himself”
* Unfortunately, it looks like law schools aren’t the only ones cooking the books. According to Citigroup, partner profits in the Am Law 100 may have been a teensy bit overstated last year. [Wall Street Journal]
* A perp walk is a terrible thing to waste. Prosecutors may be dropping the charges against Dominique Strauss-Kahn faster than the old frog can allegedly drop his pants in a hotel room. [New York Times]
* Ethics investigation? Florida better realize that it’s dealing with the legal community’s honey badger. Jose Baez don’t care. Jose Baez don’t give a sh*t. [Crimesider / CBS News]
* Lindsay Lohan wants Pitbull to give her everything in this new lawsuit. Sorry honey, but you’ve already done more irreparable harm to yourself than a rap lyric ever could. [New York Daily News]
* In a lawsuit against Urban Outfitters over a picture, we learn that underage boobs are going for $14M a pop these days. Damn you, inflation, damn you to hell. [International Business Times]
* I see an orange jumpsuit in your future. And when you’re facing 47 counts of wire fraud after being busted in Operation Crystal Ball, that’s a pretty accurate fortune. [South Florida Sun-Sentinel]
Click if you "like" this wall.
* Germany essentially outlaws the “like” button on Facebook. Really, why did we let them reunify? Did we all honestly think that was a good idea? [BuzzMachine]
* West Memphis Three could be getting out of jail. Umm… hide yo’ kids, hide yo’ wife? [WSJ Law Blog]
* Is an MBA just as bad of a bet as a JD? [Law & More]
* The hippies who don’t like genetically engineered crops need to remember that not everybody can afford to waste money on produce grown inefficiently archaically organically. [Volokh Conspiracy]
* Is that kiddie porn on your shirt or did you just buy it from Urban Outfitters? [Gawker]
* You can’t blame your e-discovery vendor when things go wrong. [Law & Technology / Forbes]
* I’m very glad that everybody is now here at the “there’s a huge problem with the market for legal education” party. Can I interest anybody in the “prospective law students are incapable of making a rational choice” punch? It’s spiked with Absolut Special Snowflake and it gives everybody the same deranged sense of self worth as new law student. [Truth on the Market]
* Of course, if you absolutely must go to law school, think outside the box and be ready to take advantage of any opportunity. You are responsible for your own career from day one. [An Associate's Mind]
Justin Bieber (image via Getty)
As someone who is nearing the age of 30, I’m a little ashamed to admit that I listen to Justin Bieber’s music. Fine, I don’t just “listen” to Justin Bieber’s music. I know all of the words to several Justin Bieber songs. They are just so damn catchy.
Anyway, teenagers today are obsessing over the Biebs like how I went nuts for New Kids on the Block, then the Backstreet Boys, and finally *NSYNC. I wasn’t truly obsessed, though (I only saw one *NSYNC concert). But these Bieber fan girls are die-hard, and even have a name for themselves: Beliebers. That’s a little over the top, even for crazed teenyboppers.
And in Mexico, one Belieber chica is truly going loca in an attempt to score a ticket to Justin Bieber’s Mexico City concert. She’s so loca, in fact, that she’s willing to trade her virginidad for him….
Continue reading “And I Was Like Baby, Baby, Baby I’ll Trade You My Virginity for Bieber Tickets”
You'll get in less trouble if you accidently shoot the one on the right.
I’m about to tell you a story. If the story included Chicago PD shooting an innocent black man who posed no threat to them, the story would end in an acquittal, vindication for the officers, and an outraged black community starting a charity fund for his widow.
But this story involves CPD shooting an innocent black Labrador Retriever. A family pet who posed no real threat to the officers. As such, the police have been punished and roundly excoriated, and a federal jury awarded the family a huge sum for damages.
Which is fine. I mean, I agree with the jury’s decision. I just don’t like living in a world where shooting my dog is a bigger liability risk for a police officer than shooting me….
Continue reading “Police Better Off Accidentally Shooting Black People Than Family Dogs”
Ah, the good old “how many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb” joke. It’s pretty stupid, but all of its variants never seem to get old.
For example, here are a few from James Fuqua’s Law Jokes:
Q: How many lawyers does it take to [change] a light bulb?
A1: How many can you afford?
A5: Three. One to change it and two to keep interrupting by standing up and shouting “Objection!”
A8: You won’t find a lawyer who can change a light bulb. Now, if you’re looking for a lawyer to screw a light bulb…
Well, thanks to a mid-size firm in Minnesota, we now know that it takes exactly five lawyers to change a light bulb….
Continue reading “How Many Lawyers Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb?”
As we mentioned in Morning Docket, a San Francisco appeals court decided that law clerks still waiting to pass the bar are ineligible for overtime pay.
Yay, sanity.
Oh, I know struggling law grads out there are eager to wring every last penny they can out of their employers. But if you step back and think about it, paying law clerks overtime is just stupid. The nature of the work doesn’t lend itself to an overtime compensation structure — to say nothing of the fact that the client who paid time-and-a-half for “overtime” legal work would be the dumbest client ever.
Sorry, law clerks. Even though many of you don’t use it, you guys have way too much independent discretion to get overtime….
Continue reading “Silly Lawyer, Overtime Is For Kids”
Remember Isaac H. Stoltzfus from Intercourse, Pennsylvania? After handing out condom-stuffed acorns to women on the street outside the Statehouse in Harrisburg, Stoltzfus became our Judge of the Day back in September 2010. In the spirit of res ipsa loquitur, we kept our coverage short and sweet.
We now know that Stoltzfus was cited with one count of disorderly conduct, but that charge was dropped. In April, the Judicial Conduct Board filed a complaint against Stoltzfus because… well, let’s not split hairs here, the dude was handing out acorns that he had personally hollowed out and stuffed with condoms. That is some pretty bizarre behavior, but Stoltzfus claimed it was just a prank, and filed a motion to dismiss the complaint.
On Wednesday, the state Court of Judicial Discipline dismissed the complaint, but why? We’ve got the scoop, after the jump….
Continue reading “Every Judge Gets a Nut: No Discipline for Isaac Stoltzfus, of Acorn Condom Fame”
Here at Above the Law, we’ve been discussing English grammar and usage forever — well, at least since 2006. We’ve discussed a plethora of grammatical and stylistic issues over the years, including how to form the possessive singular of nouns, proper use of the comma and the semicolon, and, most recently, whether to use one space or two spaces between sentences.
We’ve now decided to formalize the discussion. Every Friday we will raise an issue of grammar, spelling, or style, in our newest ATL feature: Grammer Pole of the Weak. We will kick off the discussion, then open up a reader poll and let you debate in the comments.
Today’s topic: “all right” versus “alright.” Let’s discuss….
Continue reading “Grammer Pole of the Weak: It’s All Right?”
Smile for mommy.
* This Cooley lawsuit is a “mystery.” They don’t game the numbers, they just do what “everybody else does.” Need a rimshot? [National Law Journal]
* Yesterday team Bingham McCutchen struck out swinging, and now Frank McCourt is poised to hit it out of the park. [Boston Herald]
* Recent law grads can kiss their overtime goodbye in California. Even the unlicensed can be “learned” in this profession. [San Francisco Chronicle]
* Whitey Bulger’s girlfriend pleaded not guilty to harboring the alleged Boston gang boss. Way to stand by your man to avoid a mob hit. [CNN]
* No plum smuggling for old men. According to this age discrimination lawsuit, a Speedo is a Speedon’t for men over the age of 50. [New York Daily News]
* Think you can get away with looting during a London riot? Not when your mom’s a total narc. Not cool mom, not cool. [BBC News]
You didn’t think we’d just get one day out of the Gregory Berry story, did you?
Since we posted about Berry, the former Kasowitz Benson associate who is suing the firm for $77 million, Above the Law readers have been sharing their opinions about working with him.
Some of our readers went to Penn Law School with Berry. Others worked with him when he was busy “conquering” Silicon Valley. They remember an interesting guy.
Let’s take a look at their opinions….
Continue reading “Remembrances of Gregory Berry”
Why your 3,500 sq ft wife shouldn't be driving a Lexis.
* Maybe we need law school law firms in the first place because law school professors — the ones who drill law into our heads for 3 years — are “incapable of practicing law.” [Adjunct Law Prof Blog]
* “Boss, I’m stuck in traffic. No, I’m literally stuck.” Driving your car into wet concrete is a pretty great way to perpetuate the stereotype that women can’t drive. Thanks for that. [Daily Mail]
* Star Wars Old Republic ships in November, so clients better get used to the old, “I’m too busy playing video games to attend to your matter” automated message. [Legal Profession Blog]
* If you’re Asian American and you want to be a lawyer, according to Lat it would be a good idea to have some social skills (not just study skills). [Northwest Asian Weekly]
* If you’re still thinking of taking the LSAT in October, get a leg up on the competition by getting inside the mind of one of the nerds who helped write questions for the test. [LSAT Blog]
* Proofreading is probably something that we here at Above the Law could stand to actually do every once in a while. [What About Clients?]
* Apparently, Tom Coburn forgot about the “tremendous advantage” he received from rich daddy Coburn of the “O.W. Coburn School of Law” Coburns. [Gawker]
* Alabama, I think you might be doing it wrong. Men aren’t supposed to get hosed at abortion clinics. [Constitutional Daily]
I rode BART into San Francisco on Monday for dinner. As our train approached the Embarcadero station, the driver came on the intercom.
“We aren’t stopping at this station. Don’t want to drop you in the middle of a protest.”
So my roommate and I got off a block later and backtracked. We encountered a few clumps of would-be protestors wearing Guy Fawkes masks and bandanas. They might have been more intimidating, but many had hipster neck-beards curling out from underneath the masks. Mostly, though, there were a lot of riot police. A lot. Who were mainly just standing around.
The protest was in response to Bay Area Rapid Transit’s recent decision to temporarily turn off cell phone reception in four San Francisco stations, which was in anticipation of another protest, which was in turn a response to a recent police shooting in a San Francisco BART station.
Only in California do we have protests about protests. It’s all very dramatic, but where do law and technology fit in? As is the trend these days, pesky hackers broke into the BART Police Officers Association’s website on Wednesday and released personal information about the men and women who patrol the local subway system.
Read more about the allegedly horrible, no good, very bad policy decision that led to the hack after the jump….
Continue reading “San Francisco Subway Shuts Off Cell Service, Hackers Get Angry”
A common topic in my discussions with small-firm attorneys is whether or not to specialize. There are pros and cons to both, but one of the greatest difficulties in specializing as a small-firm lawyer is to make sure that your niche can provide enough business to serve as the sole focus of your practice. For instance, it may be possible to focus exclusively on trusts and estates matters, but it is unlikely possible to focus solely on fashion law.
There appears to be a growing area that may be worthy of a niche practice: reproductive law. Consider the statistics (provided by Andrew Vorzimer who specializes in this area and writes the blog Eggdonor): 1.5 million couples will seek treatment for fertility related issues this year and half of those will be unsuccessful with traditional treatments and likely turn to assisted reproductive technologies (e.g. in-vitro fertilization and surrogacy), which often require specialized agreements (and could lead to specialized litigation). Despite this demand for legal services relating to assisted reproductive technologies, there is a dearth of legislation in this area. Together, these seem like the building blocks for a lucrative and exciting legal specialty.
There is another reason why smart, competent, and ethical lawyers should consider this specialty. This is because there are small-firm lawyers in this field like Hilary Neiman and Theresa Erickson….
Continue reading “Size Matters: Niche Practice Scarred By Baby-Selling Ring”
