Law Professors, Law Schools, Politics

Law Student of the Day: The First Thing We Do, Let’s Kill All the Gunners

You’re sitting in class, listening to your professor give a lecture. On this particular day, the content of the lecture is pretty interesting. You’ve minimized your Facebook window, and you’re actually enjoying yourself. As the class winds to a close, you see, out of the corner of your eye, a hand shoot up into the air. Dear Lord help us all. The gunner strikes again.

Your professor calls on the gunner, who then launches into a five-minute diatribe about some obscure aspect of the law. Class is over, and your classmates quietly sigh and groan as they watch other students leaving their classrooms. Your professor continues to indulge the gunner’s drivel. You’re trapped. Your class runs over, you’re now late, and you’re pissed.

Has this ever happened to you? Don’t you wish that gunners would just disappear?

Today’s Law Student of the Day has an idea that, if set into motion, will revolutionize and forever change the law school experience. What’s his plan, and where does he go to law school?

Jordan Seckman, a 2L at Washburn University School of Law, is running for Student Bar Association section representative. Both he and his campaign manager, Jonathan Kyte, plan to graduate after this coming summer through Washburn Law’s two-year program. Together they are running on an anti-gunner platform.

Now, before we applaud Seckman’s unusual campaign tactics, we want to let his classmates know that we are not endorsing his candidacy. In fact, we’re more happy to give Seckman’s opponents equal time in the spotlight, but they’ll have to do something that’s actually interesting to grab our attention. Something like this:

With the assistance of Kyte’s artistic abilities, Seckman wants you to know that the war on gunners can be won. Now, when I first saw this campaign poster, I wondered: “How are they going to win the war on gunners by walking down the street holding hands?” But then Kyte dropped some knowledge on me: it is only in a world without gunners that you can find peace and happiness as a law student.

Amazing! Why didn’t I think up this idea when I was running for SBA positions during law school? I bought my votes with candy and cutesy poster slogans (à la “Like a Good Bra, Staci Will Support You”). I won, but who knew that I could’ve won on a substantive issue?

Here’s what Seckman had to say about his unique platform:

Jordan Seckman

“Gunners” have been the bane of law schools for many years. They are a major distraction from learning. Additionally, these “gunners” annoy law students who pay a lot of money to listen a professor. I believe “gunners” are different from those who just volunteer. I would be open to input of my peers in finding solutions to the problem and winning the war against gunners.

My current ideas would include the creation of a gunner oversight position or educating professors on the effects of gunners. The task of the position would be to review student complaints and then either contact the professor or the student. I think that professors are in the best place to police gunners and control their classroom. While professors want to encourage discussion, they need to balance this with students who are a distraction in class.

Additionally, students need to confront these problem students in a civil manner. Some of these gunners are in fact delusional and this confrontation would help them learn how to work with a team.

Seckman wants to create a freakin’ gunner oversight position within the SBA to help these poor, “delusional” souls. That’s pretty hardcore. It’s kind of like AA for law students, except here, it stands for Aspies Anonymous. And well, you wouldn’t really be anonymous — if you’re a gunner, everyone knows who you are because you’re super-annoying.

Overall, this is a pretty great idea. I mean, who wouldn’t be up for destroying all gunners? But, readers, we’d like to turn this over to you. How do you think Seckman will fare against his opponents with this kind of campaign platform?

Would you vote for Jordan Seckman?

  • Yes (63%, 1,387 Votes)
  • No (37%, 800 Votes)

Total Voters: 2,185

Loading ... Loading ...

Earlier: Previous ATL honorees for Law Student of the Day

268 comments
(hidden for your protection)

comments sponsored by

Show all comments

Our Sites

  • Above the Law
  • How Appealing
  • ATL Redline
  • Breaking Defense
  • Breaking Energy
  • Breaking Gov
  • Dealbreaker
  • Fashonista
  •