December 2011
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Associate Bonus Watch 2011, Biglaw, Bonuses, Crime, Insider Trading, Money, White-Collar Crime
Associate Bonus Watch: Fried Frank Announces Bonuses 'Up to $52,500'
Here’s a Fried Frank bonus for you: Matthew Kluger, the former Fried Frank associate who sued the firm for alleged discrimination, is going to prison. As you may recall, Kluger — who also worked as an associate at other top law firms, including Cravath, Skadden, and Wilson Sonsini — was charged in a massive insider […] -
Anal Sex / Butt Sex, Depositions, Sex, Videos, YouTube
Like a Virgin, Deposed for the Very First Time
Well, we've got somebody who should be a late entrant into our Lawyer of the Year contest. He is Houston attorney Paul Waldner. He's a partner at Vikery, Waldner & Mallia, which is an arm of Justice Seekers in Texas. He is a man who brings the funny with him to the deposition room. Paul Waldner is a man who asks questions like: "So, your jurisprudential hymen is being ruptured?" Oh, you think I'm joking? No sir, I have video! And really, the witness's answer might have been better than the question.... - Sponsored
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Benchslaps, Cardozo Law School, Hotties, Rod Blagojevich
Blago's Class of 2007 Lawyer: A 'Harebrained' Hottie?
Landing a huge case is what all lawyers dream about. For most lawyers, the planets never align, and that dream never becomes a reality. But for one lawyer, that dream came true just a few years after having graduated from law school. Sometimes, however, dreams turn into nightmares. When you're representing a notorious client like Rod Blagojevich, your successes might soon turn into failures. Who is the (rather attractive) class of 2007 lawyer representing Blago, and why did a judge characterize her recent courtroom stylings as "harebrained"?
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Associate Bonus Watch 2011, Biglaw, Bonuses, Money
Associate Bonus Watch: A Nice Bonus At Kirkland & Ellis, Assuming Cravath Remains Cheap
Earlier this week, Kirkland & Ellis associates started receiving phone calls about their bonuses. Many associates are reporting that their bonuses "shattered the market." It's important to note that Kirkland has a "black box" bonus structure, in which the payouts are highly individualized and based on performance and hours. Every year, there are some winners and losers. And right now, we're hearing a lot of chatter from K&E winners.... -
Blogging, Drinking, Facebook, Pornography, Reader Polls, Shopping, Social Media, Social Networking Websites, Technology, Video games
Ways and Means of Mass Distraction
Thoreau admonished us that we cannot “kill time without injuring eternity.” But what did he know? That proto-hippie pond-fetishist could not have imagined today’s world, where our collective attention spans have shriveled to goldfish levels and so much actual productive white-collar labor can be, to an observer, indistinguishable from simply loitering in front of a […] -
Associate Bonus Watch 2011, Biglaw, Bonuses, Money
Associate Bonus Watch: Updates and Addenda
In the world of Biglaw, the subject of bonuses is a hot-button issue. People will disagree, often vehemently, on whether the bonuses paid by a particular firm are generous or cheap. Some of our recent bonus posts have generated salient updates and dissenting opinions. After the jump, we bring you postscripts regarding bonuses at several major law firms, including Cravath, Kaye Scholer, Quinn Emanuel, Sidley Austin, and Weil Gotshal.... -
American Bar Association / ABA, Biglaw, Football, Law Schools, LSAT, Morning Docket, Tax Law
Morning Docket: 12.21.11
* Most Americans can look forward to a tax increase in 2012 because our elected officials would rather bicker with each other than do their jobs. Happy freakin’ New Year! [Los Angeles Times] * Duncan Law’s dean sheds some light on why the ABA might have denied the school provisional accreditation. Come on, what’s not […]
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Bad Ideas, California, Cheapness, Holidays and Seasons, Money, Secretaries / Administrative Assistants, Shopping, Shopping For Others, Small Law Firms
California Firm Puts the 'Ghetto' Into 'Re-Gifting'
I’m much more likely to throw away a gift or give it to charity than to regift something I already have or don’t want. I think I’d live in fear of the original gift-giver meeting up with the regift recipient and talking about how I was a bad friend for orchestrating the whole mess. I’d […] - Sponsored
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Learn how emerging tools will likely change and enhance the work of lawyers for years to come in this new report. -
Animal Law, Basketball, Blogging, Divorce Train Wrecks, Non-Sequiturs, Politics, Sports, Tax Law
Non-Sequiturs: 12.20.12
* It’d be easy to say “a former Tea Party candidate posted about assassinating the President.” But it’s probably more accurate to say a crazy, racist, loony person scrawled something naughty on Facebook and is now in trouble. [Huffington Post] * I’d like to buy this, and then use it to TP Herman Cain’s house […] -
Drinking, Fashion, Food, Holidays and Seasons, Parties, Sexual Harassment, Small Law Firms
Size Matters: Ho Ho Ho
As much Valerie Katz loves her a holiday party, she does believe there are certain rules one must follow. She cannot promise that she observes these rules herself, but as the saying goes, those who cannot do, teach. And with that, here is a guide for how to behave at the office party.... -
Advertising, Career Center, Interview Stories, Shameless Plugs, This Is an Ad
Career Center: Acing Your Law Firm Interview
Lateral interview season is about to kick off. You’ll likely see several law firm vacancies pop up early in the new year as firms struggle to find replacements for attorneys who jump ship after receiving their year end bonus. In preparation for the upcoming interview season, the recruiters at Lateral Link have compiled a list […] -
American Bar Association / ABA, Law Schools, New York Times
Revenge Is Best Served... Quickly: ABA DENIES Accreditation To School That Talked To The New York Times
Over the weekend, the New York Times unleashed a feature article about the role of the American Bar Association in keeping the cost of legal education absurdly high. The school profiled in that article was Duncan Law School, which was seeking provisional accreditation from the ABA. The article came out in print on Sunday. Everybody talked about it on Monday. And today, on Tuesday, the ABA denied Duncan its provisional accreditation.... -
iPhone, Small Law Firms, Technology
Survey: Attorneys Are a Bunch of Apple Fan Boys (and Girls)
Since time immemorial (or at least since the advent of computers), PCs have ruled the law office technology world. As iPhones and iPads have become more popular, Apple products have begun encroaching on the PC’s long-standing dominance of the workplace. But who would’ve thought that Apple would actually be taking over, even in the technophobic […]
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American Bar Association / ABA, Law Schools, New York Times, Quote of the Day, Rankings, Student Loans, U.S. News
Quote of the Day: Tuition Money Well Spent?
[A] law school could literally burn a huge sum of money and, as long as the flames were meant to teach something to the students — the craziness of the U.S. News algorithm, perhaps? — the school would benefit in the rankings. — New York Times journalist David Segal, responding to a reader’s question in […] -
Associate Bonus Watch 2011, Biglaw, Bonuses, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Money
Associate Bonus Watch: Dewey Get Bonuses? Why Yes, You Do!
This actually happened last Wednesday — but, due to the less-than-exciting nature of the news, we doubt anyone has been prejudiced by our delay in reporting it. The law firm of Dewey & LeBoeuf announced associate and counsel bonuses, on the Sullivan & Cromwell scale (i.e., the Cravath scale, but topping out at $42,500 instead […] -
Cardozo Law School, Email Scandals, Holidays and Seasons, Law Schools, Screw-Ups, Technology
You Know Your Law School Really Cares When You Get Holiday Cards Like This
You know that it's the holiday season when your inbox begins to fill up with holiday cards. Some are cute, some are clever, some are heartfelt, and some come from people and companies you don't even remember meeting or doing business with. So what happens when a law school sends out a holiday card, but completely botches it? -
Associate Bonus Watch 2011, Biglaw, Bonuses, Cheapness, Money
Associate Bonus Watch: Schulte Roth & Zabel Leaves a Trail of Bonus Crumbs
Schulte Roth & Zabel really came up with a creative way to make this terrible bonus season even worse for SRZ associates. Schulte is matching the Cravath scale, but not all at once. Half of the bonus is being paid now, the other half in March. It's Schulte's way of issuing a retention bonus without actually spending any extra money.... -
Biglaw, Billable Hours, Books, Celebrities, Crime, Fabulosity, Fashion, Fashion Is Fun, Food, Lawyerly Lairs, Real Estate, Small Law Firms
An Afternoon With Ed Hayes, Celebrated Litigator and Memoirist
What draws people to the practice of law? Some do it for the paycheck, some do it for the prestige, and some do it for the excitement and fun of it all. Veteran New York litigator Edward Hayes belongs firmly in the final camp. Although he has amassed fame and fortune over almost four decades of practicing law, his legal career reflects a quest for adventure. And what adventures Hayes has had.... -
Biglaw, Election 2012, Gay, Health Care / Medicine, Jersey Shore, Law Reviews, Law Schools, Mergers and Acquisitions, Money, Morning Docket, SCOTUS, Supreme Court
Morning Docket: 12.20.11
* The Supreme Court will hear oral arguments on Obamacare over three days in March. Let’s fast forward to June so we can see how Election 2012 is going to turn out. [Blog of Legal Times] * The Grinch definitely stole AT&T’s Christmas this year, and even a team of Biglaw superstars couldn’t save the […]
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Biglaw, Holidays and Seasons, Money, Paralegals, Reader Polls, Secretaries / Administrative Assistants, Shopping, Shopping For Others, Small Law Firms
Holiday Gifts for Your Secretary / Administrative Staff: Open Thread
Over the weekend, I had dinner with a friend of mine who used to work as a paralegal at a small law firm. She told me about how one year, for the holidays, all the lawyers chipped in to get her a gift certificate to a spa, so she could get herself a massage. I […]