Non-Sequiturs: 04.04.12

* The best part of this story isn’t how the company analogizes itself to a pack of hyenas, it’s how it fundamentally misconstrues the hunting habits of hyenas. [Dealbreaker] * So this school bans a “Jesus is not a Homophobe” t-shirt because it’s indecent? Saying that the so-called Lord and Savior doesn’t hate people is indecent? Man, I love God, but the people working for him are a$$holes. [The Volokh Conspiracy] * A sex offender’s probation banned him from Facebook, but he couldn’t stay away, and now he’s in jail for ten years. I don’t see why he couldn’t stay away, most of it is just pictures of babies and… oh man, that’s freaking sick! [Not-So Private Parts / Forbes] * Was this a tip or drug money? I don’t see why it can’t be both. [Associate Press] * This must be how Jones Day gets so many clients. [What About Clients?] * Lat said he was on the fence about Judge Jerry Smith’s benchslap of the DOJ and President Obama. Ruth Marcus of the Washington Post has stronger opinions. [Washington Post] * Between the Supreme Court authorizing strip searches and the ongoing travesty of the TSA, I’m pretty close to just walking around naked all the time to save everybody the trouble of disrobing the Big Sexy. [Borowitz Report]

* The best part of this story isn’t how the company analogizes itself to a pack of hyenas, it’s how it fundamentally misconstrues the hunting habits of hyenas. [Dealbreaker]

* So this school bans a “Jesus is not a Homophobe” t-shirt because it’s indecent? Saying that the so-called Lord and Savior doesn’t hate people is indecent? Man, I love God, but the people working for him are a$$holes. [The Volokh Conspiracy]

* A sex offender’s probation banned him from Facebook, but he couldn’t stay away, and now he’s in jail for ten years. I don’t see why he couldn’t stay away, most of it is just pictures of babies and… oh man, that’s freaking sick! [Not-So Private Parts / Forbes]

* Was this a tip or drug money? I don’t see why it can’t be both. [Associate Press]

* This must be how Jones Day gets so many clients. [What About Clients?]

* Lat said he was on the fence about Judge Jerry Smith’s benchslap of the DOJ and President Obama. Ruth Marcus of the Washington Post has stronger opinions. [Washington Post]

* Between the Supreme Court authorizing strip searches and the ongoing travesty of the TSA, I’m pretty close to just walking around naked all the time to save everybody the trouble of disrobing the Big Sexy. [Borowitz Report]

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