April’s showers were supposed to bring May’s flowers, but last month turned out to be nothing but doom and gloom for the legal world. Not only did we get to see the biggest collapse of a law firm in U.S. history, but we also caught a glimpse of some of the worst allegations of attorney misconduct that we’ve seen in quite some time.
So, which attorney called opposing counsel an “ignorant slut”? Who busied himself with drawing pictures of male genitalia during a deposition? Which attorney wrote a letter to a former opponent in order to call him an “a-hole”? And who referred to a female attorney as the c-word?
Find out this, and more, when you check out our nominees for May’s Lawyer of the Month competition….
Here are your choices, along with a description of each nominee’s alleged conduct. As always, the criteria for Lawyer of the Month are whatever you guys think the criteria should be.
- Martin Sweeney: After calling opposing counsel an “ignorant slut” in an attempt to schedule a deposition, this Cozen O’Connor partner warned fellow email recipients as follows: “[Bleep] with me and you will have a huge [bleep]hole.” Alas, it looks like Sweeney ended up with the huge [bleep]hole — he’s no longer a partner at the firm.
- Richard Celler: You’ve got to admire a man with a sense of humor, but apparently Mr. Celler hasn’t quite developed a sense of when it’s appropriate to use it. He recently got his entire firm kicked off a case for his deposition behavior, namely: drawing pictures of penises, playing Angry Birds, and scheduling the deposition at a Dunkin’ Donuts.
- Marshall Davis Brown Jr.: This attorney stands accused of saying some pretty misogynist things about female attorneys, but apparently he thought it was okay to say such stuff as long as he didn’t say it to their faces — or at least that’s what his response to a motion for sanctions contends. Everything really is bigger in Texas, including the d-bags.
- Steve Filarsky: A party to a SCOTUS case, Filarsky was up for Lawyer of the Month honors back in April, when he wrote a letter to the losing litigant and advised him to read the opinion “eternally from hell.” In early May, we discovered that he wrote a letter to the losing litigant’s lawyer in the underlying investigation, and called him an “a**hole.” How charming.
- Inder Choitram: Speaking of being charming, this British gent was recently featured in Time Out Abu Dhabi for his keen fashion sense. When one of his colleagues at Clifford Chance found out and emailed the article to the entire office, Choitram responded via “reply all” and asked that the associate quit masturbating to his fabulosity. Sheesh.
Please vote in the poll below. Voting will end on SUNDAY, JUNE 3, at 11:59 PM (Eastern time).
Who should be May's Lawyer of the Month?
- Martin Sweeney (36%, 121 Votes)
- Richard Celler (24%, 80 Votes)
- Inder Choitram (20%, 69 Votes)
- Marshall Davis Brown Jr. (13%, 44 Votes)
- Steve Filarsky (7%, 24 Votes)
Total Voters: 337
Earlier: ‘[Bleep] With Me And You Will Have A Huge [Bleep]hole,’ Warns Biglaw Partner
Things That Might Get You Thrown Off a Case: Drawing Dick Pics During Depositions at Dunkin’ Donuts
Texas Lawyer Allegedly Calls Opposing Counsel The C-Word, But Says It To Her Male Colleagues So He Thinks It’s Okay
Lawyer of the Day (Part Deux): SCOTUS Victor Has Choice Words for Losing Litigant’s Lawyer
A Clifford Chance Senior Associate Begs a Colleague to Stop Masturbating to Him Via ‘Reply All’