If you show us the ability to be an attorney, we’ll give you the opportunity to be an attorney. It’s not like we let anybody in the door. We don’t. But we’re much more inclusive in our admissions policy than most law schools are.

Jeffrey L. Martlew, associate dean of the Thomas M. Cooley Law School’s brand spanking new Florida campus, commenting on the school’s admissions policy of inclusion, rather than elitism.

(Want to learn more about this bastion of legal education’s unique approach to law schools admissions? Come on, you know you do, so keep reading!)

In a recent interview with the Tampa Tribune, Martlew took the time to brag about the school’s acquisition of a 132,000-square-foot building, a place which now houses Cooley’s fifth campus. In all, the school’s got 3,745 students, and has been accredited by the same body that allows law schools to pump out kids who will someday be on welfare quicker than Octomom’s clown car vagina, the American Bar Association.

The Tribune notes, however, that despite those “qualifications,” many are critical of Cooley because the school has been known to admit applicants with questionable credentials, at best. One of those criticisms has to do with their U.S. News ranking, or lack thereof. Martlew, of course, had a rather entertaining response:

“We know we’re never going to be ranked high by U.S. News, and we don’t care,” Martlew responded. “Their philosophy is completely different than ours on admissions.”

Yes, their philosophy on admissions is different in that they use “exclusionary” data like median LSAT scores and undergrad GPAs to tabulate their rankings. With an 80 percent acceptance rate, it seems that Cooley doesn’t ascribe much value to that type of admissions data. Remember, folks, inclusion is key.

Besides, the school doesn’t need to bother with the U.S. News rankings — that’s what the Cooley rankings are for! In case you’re not familiar with that rankings system, it’s a set of that data that manages to achieve new heights of intellectual dishonesty every two years. Needless to say, we eagerly await the release of the 2013 Cooley rankings. Perhaps this year, Cooley will surpass even Yale to be the No. 1 school in the nation.

And there you have it, the Cooley Law admissions philosophy. Pulse: necessary. Intelligence: not so much.

New Riverview law school aims to fill admissions niche [Tampa Tribune]


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