The Seventh Circuit Can Tell When You Are Faking It

In the real world, nobody gives a damn about your allergies or stomach flu.

When I was a lawyer, I often fantasized about being in a non-fatal traffic accident to get out of work. Not “faking” a non-fatal accident, but actually allowing myself to be struck by a moving vehicle.

I didn’t like my job. But I’m no liar. I’m not like this guy who pretended he was too sick to go to work when he was really just unprepared…

Attorney Michael Joseph Finn was supposed to give an oral argument in front of the Seventh Circuit Court of Appeals. But Finn told the court that he had vomited in the morning and couldn’t make it. The Seventh Circuit went ahead with the case anyway, because in the real world nobody gives a damn about your allergies or stomach flu or restless leg syndrome. Cancer or GTFO.

His clients lost the case. And at that point, the court asked Finn for documentation… literally a note from his doctor, about his illness.

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