It’s been a couple of months, so maybe you thought that there were no more dumb criminals doing dumb things with technology any longer. Well, that was a very silly thought, silly-thought-thinker. You should know by now that nothing will stop the deluge of dumb. This latest is special, however, due to the impressive dedication to stupid by our criminal mastermind. This case is one in which an 18 year old man videotaped himself driving like an idiot on purpose, injured himself to the point of needing an airlift to a hospital, after which he uploaded the video to YouTube — accurately titling it “Me Driving Like an Idiot”
Robert Charles Kelley IV, 18, driving west, first struck a Toyota sedan with his 1994 Honda on State Road 44 near Jungle Road, around 3:36 p.m. Monday afternoon, police said. He fled the scene of that crash and later would strike three more vehicles that were stopped at a red light at S.R. 44 and Colony Park Road, police said. Two patients from the first crash and one from the second were taken to Bert Fish Medical Center with injuries not considered life-threatening, police said.
Police also mentioned that they were planning on arresting Kelley, because of course they are. At the conclusion of his vehicular rampage, Kelley needed help getting himself removed from his now-destroyed Honda and was taken by helicopter to a hospital. Police had thought his injuries were serious, but he was released the next day. That’s apparently when the mood struck Kelley to finally upload the video to YouTube further implicating himself. It features, you guessed it, him driving like an idiot with a soundtrack of, you probably also guessed it, irritating techno music.
Markert said Kelley’s filming and uploading of the video falls under the “What were you thinking?” category, but of because the evidence it provided police, he added, “We certainly appreciate it.”
While the original video has since been taken down, you can see clips of it in news reports like the following:
Enjoy those multiple counts of leaving the scene of an accident with injuries, reckless driving, driving without a license, and possibly even intentional battery with a vehicle, son. Here’s hoping video of your perp walk ends up on YouTube.
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