At the beginning of Superman — the real Superman, not the nonsensical slugfest from last year — General Zod and his accomplices are sentenced to the Phantom Zone for plotting a coup against Krypton’s rulers. Krypton as a whole seemed like a pretty forward-thinking place. You could tell because people wore glowing robes and robes are the universal sign of “fictional people with their collective sh*t together.” See, e.g., the Jedi, the 2688 world based on the music of Wyld Stallyns, Jesus.

Anyway, given the advanced society involved, the trial of Zod seemed a bit too Guantanamo. Zod didn’t get to mount any sort of defense and was pronounced guilty within seconds of showing up to court.

Apparently, comedian Patton Oswalt felt the same confusion and decided to provide us a glimpse into General Zod’s pre-trial prep with his public defender, “Leg-El”….

Oswalt’s ability to ad lib nerdtastic comedy is legendary. His 8-minute filibuster on Parks and Recreation proposed an insane Star Wars-Avengers crossover was reportedly made up on the spot. I don’t know if the script for this Nerdist short about an interaction between Zod (played by Chris Tallman) and Leg-El was ad libbed or retro-scripted, but it exudes an improvisational tone.

I don’t understand why he’s complaining about having 5 minutes to prepare for the trial — that’s still way more time than most public defenders get. And how can he think Billy Crystal from Soap is a “good look.” Where did he go to school, Argo City Law School?[1]

In the annals of bad clients, I guess a omnicidal narcissist would be one of the worst. Ask Alan Dershowitz about Claus von Bulow some time.

Kneel Before Zod With Patton Oswalt [Nerdist]



[1] Part of the InfiLaw consortium of independent law schools.


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