It’s a cringeworthy occasion for a judge whenever a lawyer asks for a word limit extension. Congratulations! You’re about to read a lot of unnecessary ramblings from people who don’t understand the power of well-crafted brevity.

That’s why any judge (or clerk as the case may be) will appreciate this string of 9 words capturing the soul of the American man’s relationship with the law….

Coming at you from Indiana, we have a glimpse of what would happen if Sons of Anarchy were real life.

“Girlfriend pregnant,”

[Smile] Good for you guys!

“wife knows,”

[Laugh] Ha ha! You’re screwed.

“must sell,”

[Cry] Hate to see a man parted from his hog.

“lawyer wants money”

[Laugh More] But of course the need for cash isn’t about providing for the baby or his prior family — it’s all about paying them lawyer bills!

Pro tip: this guy might need more than $7800 before this is all over.

Must Sell Ad: “Girlfriend Pregnant, Wife Knows, Lawyer Wants Money” [Neatorama]


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