The Candy Crush Law School

Law school gives up on recruiting people whose lives are going somewhere.

The Daily Business Review has a nice article up on the declining number of applications to law schools in Florida. You are familiar with the gist, if not the details. Applications are down at all but one Florida law school. The money quote is from George Dawson, dean of the University of Florida Levin College of Law: “If any law school dean told you he or she wasn’t concerned, you shouldn’t believe it…We had a significant problem this past year … with applications down 20 percent.”

Well, that’s the money quote from a news perspective. From a comedy perspective, we’ve got to check in on a different law school…

Nova Southeastern experienced another double digit drop in applications. The DBR says Nova has decided to go to social media to market its law school:

Nova is combatting the decline by stepping up its marketing efforts and hiring social media consultants to reach out to prospective students through social media such as Google, Facebook, Instagram and Candy Crush.

Wait, assistant dean for admissions, William Perez, makes it even worse:

“We have not been good at marketing and promoting our school, and that’s what we are doing now,” Perez said. “Rather than spending many hours on a college campus, we are turning towards social media as a direct marketing campaign to get our name in front of the students so they can see us an option.”

The school will still do some limited recruiting in Florida and the mid-Atlantic states, he noted. Tuition at Nova is $35,956 annually.

Sponsored

I’m going to pause right now for laughter.

I couldn’t make up a funny thing to say that is any more embarrassing than a school freely admitting it’s not wasting time recruiting kids FROM COLLEGE and is instead focusing its energies on Candy Crush players. It’s like if you are actually spending time on campus, perhaps in a library or participating in some other activity to further your professional goals, you are OUT OF NOVA’S LEAGUE.

If, on the other hand, you are wasting time on an app game that thrives off of people with low impulse control making unwise purchases, you might be perfect for Nova.

Nova Southeastern: The Law School For People With Nothing To Do.

Falling Down: Florida Law School Applications Tanking [Daily Business Review]

Sponsored