Biglaw Chairperson Entirely Unexcited About New Job

Check out a Biglaw manager giving the worst line readings since Attack of the Clones....

Sometimes, firm publicists need to understand that it’s more about shoulda than coulda. Sure, you could put your entirely capable but not necessarily media-trained new chairperson in front of a camera to film an awkward welcome video, but that doesn’t mean you should. The buzzword-driven types probably shouted “New Media!” and “Video is the Future!” or some such and cajoled this lawyer in front of the camera.

What we ended up with are some of the worst line readings since Attack of the Clones….

We recently congratulated Therese Pritchard on assuming the role of chair of Bryan Cave. Per her bio, the former SEC lawyer had served on the firm’s Executive and Compensation Committees, as leader of the White Collar, Securities Enforcement and Litigation Client Service Group, and as Asia Coordinator. Now she’s the firm’s first female chair and the first chair from beyond Bryan Cave’s St. Louis stomping grounds. Contrary to the title of this story, I’m sure she’s really excited about her new job.

Unfortunately, someone told her this was a good idea [The video has been removed, so you’ll have to enjoy the description below].

The tipster who pointed me to this put it well: “See if you can spot the moment when her unbridled excitement at taking the job comes through.” This isn’t a “welcome,” it’s a hostage video. I kept watching her eyes to see if she was blinking a message in Morse code that could help us find her. But then I realized she isn’t really blinking as much as shifting her eyes back and forth down a teleprompter. On shows like Ancient Aliens, they assert that a president is noticeably different after inauguration because they finally get told the truth about how the Rand Corporation — in conjunction with the saucer people, under the supervision of the reverse vampires — is doing something or other, and it freaks them the hell out. I wonder if Pritchard’s first briefing as chair of Bryan Cave went something like that.

If the firm would like some free advice, replace this video with something — anything — showing Pritchard in her natural element. Maybe speaking off the cuff or responding to interview questions. Just don’t hang your new chair out to dry like this by forcing her to give a wooden read of unnatural copy. She deserves better than that.

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THERESE PRITCHARD TAKES THE HELM AT BRYAN CAVE LLP [Bryan Cave]

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